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Life Suicide Poems | Life Poems About Suicide

These Life Suicide poems are examples of Life poems about Suicide. These are the best examples of Life Suicide poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Rhyme | |

On My Own Terms

Mama became sick when I was in sixth grade,
It was really hard to cope with sacrifices we made.
Kids were cruel and did not understand the reality,
Of a trying pathway now set out before Daddy and me.
I was picked on and laughed at, hair pulled, I was teased.
I let them laugh to my face, shoved down on broken knees.
Until the day I rose to fight, facing my bullies I fought tough.
I would never give in to bullies again, I became jagged and rough.

My spirit fought hard. Tears, love, experience, learns and yearns,
I'm living my life on my own terms!

Boys tried to take me on, take me out, and have me surrender.
I never let one kiss and tell, My purity would never dive under.
I met my prince charming for whom I had waited for a ring.
Years and years of waiting peacefully for love, joy it did bring.
While all my girlfriends partied hard, their lives fell off the spotlight.
I sat in the shadows quietly waiting, I shined when the time was right.
The first kiss was heaven, and every taste was even sweeter than before.
Two rings, three kids, a family, how could I have asked for more.

My spirit fought hard. Tears, love, experience, learns and yearns,
I'm loving my life on my own terms.

I started feeling something, deep inside my body, it grew,
I went to the doctors to confirm what I already knew.
Mama suffered so many years, I was too young but it came.
When I got the news of my sickness, nothing would be the same.
Children grown and married, husbands fingers worn to the bone.
No one should see me suffer, I put a payment on the headstone.
Softly I said my goodbyes, no one could stop me from my choice.
I wanted to say I love you, while I still had a strong, firm voice.

My spirit fought hard. Tears, love, experience, learns and yearns.
I'm leaving my life on my own terms.



08-17-2014
*fictional story, I have no feelings on the if suicide is okay speech, this story is just a character, it is what is it is.


Details | Salaam | |

Yeh khaalipan


Jab Meri Bechaini Mit Jayegi
Jab Mere Dilko Sukoon Mil Jayega
Yeh Khaalipan Mit Jayega

Do Pal Ki Chandni Ke Liye
Aj Bhi Zinda Hoon Main
Meri Khaamoshi Ke Ageh Aasmaan Bhi Khatam Ho Jayega

Kehne Ke Liye Toh Roz Marta Hoon Main
Thoda Aur Marne Ke Liye
Yeh Deewana Kal Phir Ayega


Details | Ode | |

Love is a Sacrifice

You have my soul, but you have your fate Whatever your words, I’m willing to take You have my word; I’ll give you my breath It’s like a chain that would never be break You are my love with all my heart, I’ll fight for you with all my might. And in the way, you admire your goals, You hold my hands, but not so close. As you go to your chosen path, I’ll accept the fact that we will be apart. In the dark side, I leave behind Within my faith, that you’ll arise Please don’t look back, coz I’m fighting still I’m hurting so much! Don’t want to have you near I accept my fate for what it does, I’m bleeding so much, do you know for whom it was? You reach your goals, as you want to have, Would you remind the man that gave what he had? As you reach the stars, and be the one Be a sun that shines its own. After the rain, the rainbow comes, Like dark in the moon, when the light flash A glimpse from you at least a short For then I knew my pain is worth.


Details | Rhyme | |

My Final Exit

I'm dying and I'm angry because it isn't fair,
and with my family, friends and loved ones this news I will not share.
It's hell for me to be going through all of this alone, but that is the cross I must bare.
It's my last gesture to show all of them how much I loved them and truly cared.
The last thing that I want is to be the cause of any of their despair.
If I told any of them that I was dying, 
it would only serve to depress all of them,
and so my limited time left with them, for all of them, never to them will be known.
When I do feel that my time is drawing near I'll announce a trip I'll be going on.
I'm a wilderness survivor enthusiasts. 
I've been known to venture deep into and live in very remote wilderness.
so one day I'm going to announce to them that I'm going on another little trip.
I'll leave unknown to they what will be my following final statement.
"If I do not return, please do not notify any authorities.
Please do not send out any search and rescue parties.
If I do not return it does not mean that I've suffered any life threatening injuries.
Most likely it means that I've made a choice to continue living there and never leave,
living my life naturally and in solitary with all of nature surrounding me.
That's the way I've always pictured my retirement to be.
Inevitably I will one day die in the wilderness, but likely in my sleep peacefully,
but for all of you I will never die, at least never officially,
and you'll assume that I'm still living my life the way I always wanted it to be,
in solitude far away from any so called civilized society.
I'll miss everyone of you very dearly, 
but I'll be living my life in a manner that will truly make me happy,
and isn't that the way retirement is supposed to be?"
I'll embrace them all and share with them how much I hold all of them so dear,
and then I'll venture off into the wilderness, never again to reappear,
and should it ever look as if I won't die after all peacefully in my sleep
I've brought along a little extra insurance with me.
If the pain gets over bearing or if I get too weak
to successfully forage and gather enough to eat.
If malnutrition is getting the best of me,
I'll swallow a half dozen tranquilizers which will render me unconscious shortly,
so it's very important after taking them to stay active on my feet
until I begin to feel the effects of the meds affecting me.
Only then will I lie down comfortably
and slip a plastic bag over my head snugly
secured with a rubber band around my neck for extra security.
Within seconds I'll be deeply unconscious and asleep
and I won't even be aware of any discomfort as my carbon dioxide I breath.
and then slowly, humanly and most peacefully
my final exit will arrive and death will take me.
Animals will scavenge upon the remains of my body,
providing them with much needed nutrition for them to eat.
The rest will decompose and bring nutrition to the soil
which will provide seeds with nourishment enabling new life to unfold.
I will then be for all eternity where I most would ever want to be,
among nature's wildlife and forests of fresh streams and lush trees.


Details | Lyric | |

Solipsist

Let the Deicide commence.

You're a voyeur at best!
Your vampiric heart is beating out of your chest!
And you have slayed the ones whom would love you for anything less
Ready to consume the final fragments of innocence,
And for you there is no forgiveness,
On your knees pleading, screaming to a tyrant in the skies;
The father of lies.

I will never be enslaved in your superiority
The people agree: jaded of your false dichotomies.
Know: I will be whomever nature intends to be
Apollo and I will share our dreams,
and you will be forced to see
your failure!

I know who you are...
Readily the first to present your scars
Chained by some despot or mental czar
An emotional homunculus in your mind, behind bars
Reluctant to escape - even when proven fake
Your demented mind - depths no one will penetrate!
 
...And you see me suffering
Not caring of any casualties
Just as long you recieve your safeguard of sympathy
So very wary of the masses and their Anarchy; Liberious ways

Solipsist - Is there no one you can see?
Even if she was presented burning?
Solipsist - Is there no one you can believe?
Even if Sophia was screaming?
Solipsist - Know you have killed and abused me
Imprisoned in your own  personal reality 




Details | Personification | |

Not Really

How it must hurt you so on days like this,
  Walking around with a frown clutching your fist.
Hearing the words that are meant to anger you,
   Confused  you cry because there is nothing you can do.
Your mind is playing tricks on you driving you to say,
    I hate you all and the games you play please just go away.
Trusting nobody you are not sure which way you sould go,
    It's not real and  all in your head  is what you do not know.
Waiting to see just what tomorrow will possibly bring,
    All will be perfect and you wont rememver a thing.
Your thoughts they torement you  almost every day,
   Each night asking our Lord why your life is this way.
Feeling so alone thinking there is nobody who cares,
   But actually there is so many but you are not aware .
If only you would hear me so you might begin to see,
   You must believe in yourself if you want to be free.
You must have some faith if you are to understand ,
    What God has in store for you and what he has planned.
All the hurt and anger will soon begin to disappear ,
    You'll stand up tall again facing life with no fear.
Please remember always that you are never alone,
    By listening with your heart your path will be shown.
TAC


Details | Alliteration | |

My Love

My love I can not find you anywhere, 
I feel like I lost my soul somewhere, 
because you are my soulmate, 
and us being apart can not be fate. 

You did not leave because you wanted to, 
It just was just something you had to do. 

I was not right, All I wanted to do was fight, 
and knowing you was the love of my life, 
yet I would not make you my wife. 

I know that's what you really wanted 
and now I am feeling haunted, 
by the things I should have done, 
and you being the only one 
I ever loved and will love forever, if it was'nt for me we will still be together. 
 
But you are gone 
and I can not go on, 
so I must say good-bye, I'm leaving myself to die.


Details | Free verse | |

Love, Death, and Rebirth

The signs started in December
When she started waking up in tears each night
She was a normal girl with dark brown hair and darker brown eyes
She had plenty of friends and a loving family with just one thing missing
Her father. 

Days passed by and turned into weeks but only felt like a few seconds
Her life just whizzed by faster and faster until it was just a whirr in front of her eyes
Darkness filtered into her heart and mind until she didn't know if she could go on
But she had to. She couldn't let her mother and her sister drown in this same pain
She wouldn't let them.

She pushed all the darkness into the depths of her own heart
In hopes to save the hearts of the two people she had left
Because what else was there to live for now?
The rest of her world had crashed and her mother and sister was all that was left 
She wouldn't let them drown in pain too. 

She watched as they started to heal in her loving arms
Their hearts started to lighten up once more
But hers was just as dark as it was before 
And growing darker day by day 
But she wouldn't let that stop her. 

Suddenly a year had passed... and then two 
It only seemed like seconds to her but everyone else started moving on
Her mother and sister no longer needed her nurturing care
But she needed someone to hold on to
Anyone...

With nothing left for her to take control of, the dark pushed past her boundries 
It found a way into her soul
Until all she could see was dark and no light 
But her mother and sister were healed now
They didn't understand

The tears came back and engulfed her soul
Bit by bit until she wasn't sure why she was still alive
The grief took over like knives 
Piercing her skin over and over and over
It hurt so much.

She started to wonder what it'd look like to be dead
She could see him again if she was
Wouldn't it be so much easier than having to endure this pain?
Wouldn't it be so much easier than having to live knowing she'd never see him again?
It would.

So she started to hate herself
All that negative energy was starting to take toll
Everyone around her was breathing while she suffocated more and more by the second
She wished she'd just choke already instead of living in constant pain
If no one would put her out of her misery, she'd have to do it herself

She couldn't see any light anymore
So she grabbed the pill bottle off the shelf and just hoped it wouldn't take long to die
Deep down she still had a spark of light, but she just couldn't find it 
And now it was too late in her mind to change, to turn back and try to look deeper
She was done living.

That's when people started to notice that everything wasn't as peaceful as it seemed
They started to see how deeply depressed she had become
They wanted to help her see the light again before it was too late 
So they sent her away to see doctors and to take pills to make everything better
It was a start.

She didn't see a change at first but suddenly she could think clearly
Maybe what they were doing was actually going to help her see the light again
Yes, she still wanted to die, but maybe that wasn't the only option anymore
They cared,  and behind all their own problems they were trying to understand
They really were trying

Six months longer she would be treated and cared for
Until suddenly she was sent home from her treatment and care with a smile on her face
She had a new perspective
Someone had helped her ignite that spark in her heart until it was a glowing ember
She had been reborn

Sometimes you have to be able to experience the worst of it
To come back shining brighter than before
And if she had died that cold day in October, she wouldn't of ever seen the best of it
Or known that it would get better
and it did!

And she now sits at her laptop, with a smile on her face and warmth in her heart
It's never been an easy road and it won't ever be
But at least she knows she's lived through the worst
And it can only get better from here

So whenever she feels lonely or gets back into that dark spot again
She can look back on what she's learned and can read this poem
And remember that she survived the darkest depths of depression
And she will continue to survive it as long as she lives
Because she is stronger now than she ever was before ?


Details | Lyric | |

Lacerated Wings

They are bound to the Earth like trees
Suffocating under the weight of an icy grave 
Reaching to be free, but only their limbs are seen
Hoping that one day someone will see:
They can't escape with lacerated wings

The ocean surrounds me, covering everything
Nothing will be clearly seen; confusion overwhelming
No-one can save you, you're on your own, left to die
Manipulating every bleeding heart you can find
I can't escape with lacerated wings.

Swarms of nets, waves of screams 
Entangle: your captive illusions and dreams
The mask has be seared - The truth now they see
The Liar - Vampiric Fiend; lowly thief
And now they know you can't escape with Lacerated Wings

There's reasons for your rejections:
Your Heavy heart's transferred oppression
The scars are too deep to pass the trials
But you can find peace in your cage of empty spirals
You Cannot Escape With Lacerated Wings


Details | Rhyme | |

4 - Messenger from the Dead

Alas there is no more confusion,
finally found my last conclusion.
Expect me as if Jesus will return,
from a ghost to a realm of concern.

Your dreams are portals like doors,
welcoming spirits into hasten wars.
Leaving the thoughts without trust,
keeping your fears in much disgust.

And though you sought no consequence,
deeds that confirm a wicked malevolence.
Awaiting in your nightmare of screams,
enjoy what is left amongst your dreams.


Details | Rhyme | |

Stop Thinking

You say you're ugly,
You say you're fat,
You say you hate reality,
but it's not just that.

You say there's nothing good,
you say everyone hates you
you say you can't eat food,
I wish I could help you.

Because in my eyes, you're beautiful.
In my eyes, you are perfect.
In my eyes, you are wonderful.
Please take the time to reflect.

You want to die,
I want you to survive.
You're trying to say goodbye,
but I'm holding onto the knives.


Details | Rhyme | |

Ana

She writes her songs and her poems,
not one person know 'em.
She listens to the sound of her music,
she's stuck to it like a tick.

If someone took the time to listen,
her true colors would glisten.
She's put on a mask,
and hid everything when someone asked.

She was the type of girl who would always laugh,
making you wish it would last.
She was the type of girl who would smile the day away,
too bad it is no longer that way.

She is now the girl who is depressed,
I bet you're impressed.
Since no one could tell
that she was going through hell.

Everyone thought she was happy, 
when really, she felt crappy.
Everyone thought she was having the time of her life,
who would have guess her best friend was a knife?

She spent her days alone,
she seemed to do everything on her own.
Never once wanted help.
Thought she could do everything herself.

Then the day came,
when she lost the game.
She fell apart,
and everyone saw her broken heart.

They saw the way she overreacted.
Oh, if only you saw the way she acted.
She bruised herself, scratched herself, and made herself bleed,
no one knew what it was that she needed.

They saw her tears,
and that was what she feared.
They found out she wasn't okay,
oh, she hated that day.

Everyone found out about her secret,
and she wish they'd just forget,
but she knew they couldn't,
and that they wouldn't.

She left that town and started over,
no one knew she went undercover.
She said she got better,
when really... something else occurred. 

She secretly hurt herself,
and walked away from help.
Everyone thought she recovered,
when really, she was undercover.

She secretly wanted to get worse,
no one knew of course.
No one cared to ask,
if she was wearing her mask.

Now it's too late,
she locked the gate.
Killed herself,
everyone had forgotten she needed help.

Goodbye cold world,
this was a story of a girl
who once loved everyone
then feared who it was who won.


Details | I do not know? | |

Welcome 2013

Well we are already a couple of months in so i just wanted to say welcome. 
this will be a new journey for the both of us, so i hope it will be awesome. 
I will try to write more than usual this year, I promise. :)
What would help tho if you readers would send me topics and stuff to help me write about things cuz my mind goes way faster than my fingers and i cant think of just one thing. lol. so thank you readers. plz comment and tell me your thoughts.


Details | Free verse | |

The River home

It was a home on the river we lived .
It was the ghost of a young man whom had taken his own life.

I still remember the vision of him walking by me with a blank stare 
We,  as a Family of  seven , moved into this river house 
Panoramic views right out to the river , I should mention

I was home alone as a child , looking out at "The Julia Belle Swan " as she went by .
Upstairs in that room as I saw a figure walking by , with very nice features , auburn hair 
I thought he was my older brother , a handsome young guy 

Then I realized the young man was not my brother , a  apparition he appeared .
He was not there to scare or frighten , 
the message I believe he wanted to shed light on, so clear.

He walked right by ,then disappeared through the window, out to the River .

The Ghost knew I could see him , a gift I have been given
when I was a younger child of five , I had once died for a short time. I was lifted by Jesus in Heaven . Death is not for us to decide .

Later in the years we moved from that home , every home we lived in had a story 
or a presence of its own . My Mother had told me later , a young man took his life there .

 Keep fighting your way through life and its despair , 
you are important to someone whom cares .  If you feel alone and want life to end , Please pick up the phone , call anyone ,  call for help , call a Friend .

"This is not fiction , it truly is a gift I have been given "


Details | Carpe Diem | |

Lucid Dream

Look upon city once known by name,
ruins that I called home, streets swallowed by flame,
in time alive shell not witness less of what should you understand,
reach on to hand of a stranger, scroll remain;
in signs that might be changing welcome,
different of a man.

When dawn awakes and there is no light,
upon dusk of man darkness will be spread by sight,
in time not different change will arise, life we thought you knew,
death would recognize.

Hearts will bound to King without a Crown,
why do mothers shed tears, echo rooted in the ground,
is there reason of a foolish wars, contracts written in blood,
new born babies died breathless, can't even appreciate the Sun,
don't deserve to live, not worth of the land,
existence will be scattered in ashes,
you will be remembered
by name.


Details | Personification | |

SUICIDE NOTE

My name is flower
Of number one display and color
To commit suicide I decide
To take nuclear waste or pesticide

Am tired of you people polluting the air
Polluting our rivers and streams that's not fair
You clear out our jungles, you cut down our mountains
To make way for tall buildings Hollywood Mansions and fountains

You burn fuel for energy source
Depleting the ozone showing no remorse
You drill, you drain the earth of it's natural resource and nutrients
Causing a shift in the earth's plate
Evidence Tsunami and Earth Quake

I cannot take it anymore
This is the final straw
Yes am gonna commit suicide
Either by Nuclear Waste or Pesticide
O! yes you need me for oxygen
along with all other plant life existing

So if I were to take them all with me you'll die
You'll be no more... no lie?
So sit back admire the beauty, the splendor  
The wonderful blossoming of a flower

In my last breath I write this suicide note
Dated 25th April 2011 by... flower


©Copyright April 2011 by Brian Pierre-Alexander
© All Rights Reserved


Details | Rhyme | |

Death by Beauty

A smile moves across her lips
She gazes at her crime
A scar across her flesh and soul
To haunt her for all time
She’ll waste away for all she cares
Never stops to use her brain
Doesn’t care about the ones who are close
All she cares about is pain

She wants to be what the others expect of her
Doesn’t care about the self-respect for her
A rose can’t be a forget-me-not
Can’t she see what all she has got
Already?

Never to go back again
She feels the world is at an end
She will never show her grief
Although she’ll cry in empty streetS

She’d sooner live like a desolate mole
Living in fear in an empty hole
Screaming silent wails alone
Content to live in her mental home

A final tear falls from her eye
It hits the ground, it’s followed by
A beautiful body, mutated by hate
A kind word could have stopped it, but it is too late
One two many bricks in the wall in her mind
Molding her demise because her heart was blind
This self conscious being could never have won
For she was destroyed by the beautiful ones

She wouldn’t fight back, wouldn’t respect herself
In the end, she managed only to wreck herself
A rose can’t be a forget-me-not
Little did she know, she had all she had sought
Already


Details | Rhyme | |

Someone Felt Like Giving Up

Someone Felt Like Giving Up! I know someone who wanted to give up. Things in life began to “trip him up.” After much thought and contemplation. He really offered no real explanation. He felt like his life was at a “dead end road.” He said he couldn’t continue with a heavy load. No matter how many different things he tried. He was not happy… Nor satisfied! He began to share a piece of his mind… He was ready to leave everything behind. The choices that he had sometime ago… Began to “wear” at his heart and soul! I tried to encourage him the best I could. But I’m not sure he really understood. As I watched him go his separate way… I said; “there’s something I wanted to say.” “There’s a God who reigns in haven above!” “He wants to fill you with his hope and love!” “He knows and cares about everything you’ll do!” “He’s loving and kind!” “And wants to help YOU!” As I spoke, I could see he thought for a minute. A commitment to God… He decided to give it! He decided to give it all to a God who won’t fail him! He wanted to serve a God, who wants to bless him! He’s happy now that this choice was taken! With Jesus… He’s never alone nor forsaken! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Concrete | |

Confession Chamber

Forgive me Father for I have sinned,
for being born with you to begin,
its been a long time since my last confession,
I don't wont your blessing,
lies and resurrection.
I don't believe in love, I don't believe in faith,
cant stand my own kind,
humble in hate,
I don't believe in truth, I don't wont to be saved,
erase me from your list,
buried, unmarked,
graved.

Abused as a child,
bloodstains of a man,
only shovel awaits,
forgive me if you can.


Details | I do not know? | |

mama

mama how do i tell you its bad again
how the voices are telling me its okay to hurt
they want me to fall
to fall from the top of buildings 
and not get up
but don't worry mama
i plan to shut them up

mama how do i explain how the pain has returned
all you wanted was me to be better
i tried and tried and tried and tried
but in the end, the crazy won
they drive me crazy to no end
i want to make it stop 
but don't worry mama
i have a plan

mama i cant tell you how it feels
to be sunken to the depths of earth
angels are soaring above me
but their happy gazes hurt
i need this incessant chatter to go
to hurt me, to hate me 
it all feels so real
but don't worry mama
it wont soon

mama i can see the look in your eyes
it hurts me too that this is goodbye 
cant you see this is the only way 
for the voices to vanish but my body stay
goodbye and farewell 
ill miss you so much
but don't cry mama
ill be better now


Details | Light Poetry | |

A night to forget

She thought that he’s charming
Her friends says he is so cute
But little did they know
It’s the furthest from the truth

Her mom buys her a new dress
Because he ask her to the prom
But during the fun and laughter
He spikes her punch with rum

She wakes up in his BMW
He,s smiling with a cigarette
A morning she will remember
A night to forget

She can’t stop crying
She lies on her bed
Feeling hurt and disgusted
Suicide thoughts comes to her head

Her mom notice the changes
But she don’t know what is wrong
She use to sing in the church choir
The preacher says she stops coming around

She hugs her mother last night
Then walks out the door alone
And its now early morning
She didn’t come back home

She jumps over the bridge
They pull her body soaking wet
She couldn’t live with the memory
Of the night she can’t forget

It’s sad that her young life was ruin
By the evil that lays hidden behind a smile
Her mother life is shattered
Never knowing what happen to her child

This is happening to innocent girls
All over the world
Taking away their dignity and pride
Sucking the life out of their very soul

Another girl sits under a tree
Reading a book of poem by kaz ishmael
He said “excuse me just got to say
That you have a beautiful smile

She brushes her long hair
Think her jeans didn’t fit to right
His BMW is waiting out side
They are going to movies tonight


Details | Light Poetry | |

Tomorrow

We don’t know what tomorrow brings
So we just can’t speculate
And it will make no sense
For us to just sit down and wait

The love we found today
We both know it’s real and true
All love with face some obstacles’
But love will always make it through

Some people will try to hold back
What they are feeling in their heart
When they know this love is a fairy tale
Romance Right from the very start

We are worrying about the future
Bout the unknown is like a blank page
But god can close the curtains anytime
Down on any one’s stage

I know a man who loves woman
He falls for her heart and soul
And his parents says it’s crazy
He’s too young and she’s too old

So they stop them from getting marry
Causing years of pain and sorrow
While driving he got in accident today
And they will bury him tomorrow

And the wound in her heart won’t stop bleeding
And every breathe she wish was the last she take
A little boy calls his dad, saying look, look ,dad
And they found her body floating in the lake

His parents was worried bout the future
Although they know it was unknown
But still they plant the seeds of pain
Now look what it has grown

Why didn’t they let them be together?
For today all that remains is sorrow
For trying to change the course of true love
They have taken away their tomorrow

For today they would have been married
And build a happy home of love
But now they are two lost souls
Forever roaming the world above

Some times one year of happiness
Is worth 100 years of being alone
For as long as two hearts are true
Forever the flowers of love will bloom

And as long as there are stars in the sky
And the waves must come to the shore
People of all different ages
Will be falling in love forever more

But what if tomorrow never comes
And you let today go
Then the real magic of true love
You will never get to know


Details | Free verse | |

Life Can Be Cruel

I cannot get into heaven
God I have tried!
Suicide is a double edge sword
Especially when you survive!
Walking the streets at night
Dazed and confused
Longing to be loved
Wondering...
When is Mum, coming for me?

"Does she still love me?"
"Does she still care?"
"Does she still think of me?"
"Does she wonder, where I am?"

I want her to come find me
I want her to say she 'loves me’
I want her to comfort me
I want her to take me home
And keep me safe
And not forget hat I exist
Like the way she treats me now

I wish God 
Could make my Mum
Magically appear
Making this hellish nightmare
On the street
Disappear!

“Send my Mum please!”
So, all this can end!
Before this last ray of hope
Diminishes for good!

I don’t want to become
The walking dead
Forever forgotten as if 
I was never born!
For this is the cruel, harsh reality
Of living life, feeling unloved
Uncared for, abandoned,
Left to fend for my own

A dangerous killer inside me
Eating away, at my soul
Something, no one can see
As I suffer in silence
My insides crippling!

Lost, alone and frightened
Weeping on a dirty
Graffiti park bench
Dirty tears
Rolling down my cheeks
Stuffing newspapers under my jumper
To keep myself warm

“What am I going to do?”

“Will I make it through the night?”
“Will I get raped and beaten?”
"Will I be left for dead?”
“Will I survive
To see another day?

“Is my life worth living?”

Please God, I beg of you
Have mercy now
Please show me the way!


Details | Ballad | |

All in great time

Don't stand at my grave,
An weep.
I'm not no long there.
I'm forever asleep
In a peaceful place.
You may look up,
  To the sky.
Maybe even daydream 
 Of are memories...
 I just ask this one
  Simple thing ...
Please don't cry,
Upon that stone
With my name engraved,
Cause that body is,
No longer mine...
I'm not there...
But I'm here somewhere at ease..
 Share are memories 
Tell are stories.
Cherish ever moment,
And soon enough.
ALL IN GREAT TIME
Forever by my side,
But it's not your time,
So get up and dry
Your crying eyes...
I'll be here no rush..
Together soon enough...
Don't give up...


Details | Limerick | |

Big Fat Looser

I Am a Big Fat Looser

Oh I am a big fat looser
I don’t deserve to live
I need someone to take a Gun
And shoot me till I’m dead

Yes I am a big fat looser
I really want to die
I’m looking for a violent guy
To shoot me in the eye

Oh I am a big fan looser
I really have to say
If this is life I realize
I hate it every day

Yes I am a big fat looser
And life is just the pits
I am a guy that wants to die
Not live another day

Oh I am a big fat looser
I really hate this life
If you the one don't have a gun
Then maybe use a knife

Yes I am a big fat doofus
I really have to say
If suicide is painless
Well then maybe that’s the way

Oh I am a big fat doofus
I live in misery
But I don’t have the courage
Or I’d blow myself away

I really am a doofus
I’ve one more thing to say
If anyone is listening
Then shoot me right away
So I can die today


Details | I do not know? | |

The suicidal girl and the mean guy

Why tell people in advance?
Do you want them to feel guilt?
For not loving you, listening to you?
Why hurt them? Revenge?
Yes, the world has hurt you,
It can be cold and mean.
So you do have the power
to make a lot of people feel guilt.
You want to leave the world, hurting people?

So you weren’t loved as a child, 
a lot of us weren’t. When you grow up
you learn it is not about others loving us,
it is about the love we give others.
You cant make the world love you, 
but you can bring love into the world. 
That’s why you have a heart. 

Every major religion agrees suicide is bad for the soul
In the west, we call it purgatory,
you sit alone, in a dark place, and feel,
you feel guilt, shame, hurt, and loss.
God isn’t there, the angels aren’t there
It’s more alone than you are now,
feeling 1000 times worst,
and the only thing you can do is feel it,
go into the emotions and purge them
until you are capable of loving again,
giving love to others, that is.
Only, then can you even be near an angel or god.
A soul with no love, cannot even be in God’s presence.
That is why purgatory exists, to purify a soul of its selfishness

Here is your cure, 
Go help some people worse off than you.
Look into their eyes, feel their suffering,
share theirs with them, listen to their pain,
radiate love to them, be quiet and listen
As you give to them, you heal.....

Write poems of how you feel, 
your life experiences, stop writing suicide stuff...
Take your pain and put it into the art,
go deep, make yourself cry. 
If the poem doesn’t hurt you, it’s not deep enough. 
Write some on beauty that make you feel it..

Pray for the planet and all the people in pain
Imagine your heart glowing love, healing it all.

Forgive everyone that has hurt you.
Anger will burn a hole in your heart. 

Face your fears, go out in the world
heal it, make it a better place

This is your mission here..............


Details | Rispetto | |

Suicide Attempt Survival

Loving to all around her, happy with life She started to change, slowly at first you see It was painful to see the sadness, her strife She wanted to die, her life was so empty Nothing that was said registered in her brain Seems that she was always living in the rain One day she tried to take her life with some pills Trying to dull the pain on the window sill She survived the desired encounter with death Living to face a new day without sadness And now with a secure new outlook and breath The dark won’t be so dark within the brightness She has found hope in the near death ritual She’s glad there won’t be a lonely burial Now life resumes as she survives an ending Out into life she brings love with her sending
Russell Sivey Contest: Surviving After Suicide Attempts Sponsor: Anne Currin 7/28/2013


Details | Rhyme | |

I Knew Someone Who Wanted to End It All

I Knew Someone Who Was Ready to “End It All!” I knew of someone who just wanted “to end it.” Giving up on life, and did not want to “defend it.” It was a heart wrenching and difficult situation. He said what he wanted to, with no explanation! I could see his face and the sad look in his eyes! What he was going to do next, was anyone’s surprise. He turned to drugs and encountered addictions. With this brought much disease and afflictions! He gave up on the wonderful family that was given. And turned to a pretty wild and crazy way of livin’! I told him about a God who loves him very deeply. As he listened, he began to grow restless and weary. I reached for his hand and began to pray for God’s power! It was a miracle! The blood of Jesus changed him that hour! The spirit of God brought healing and hope to his body! He was so excited! He rushed out to tell everybody! The “end” that he wanted, seemed to just fade away! For the son of the living God, changed him this day! The glory of God, and the power of Jesus’ resurrection… Changed him! And got him going in a NEW direction! He’s so thankful for the blood of Christ’ atonement! And is a different person now, because of that moment! This same Jesus loves and can do the same for YOU! Through the problems of life… He will see you through! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Verse | |

I blame me

I blame me for all my mistakes
I blame me for all the rejection and heartache
I blame me for all the times I stayed silent 
and should have started and earthquake
with my words
I should have spoken up when I had the chance
now all those thoughts are wasted
unspoken, unheard

I blame me when my husband touches me 
and I feel the hands of a predators pounce
And I blame me when the pressure it on
because all I had to do was shout out and renounce His name
Lord, help me to get rid of the shame

I blame me for my loneliness
I blame me for my feelings of lust
I blame me when I look at myself and see absolute disgust
I blame me when I shut down - unsure of who to trust
At times not even sure if I really know how to love

I blame me when my kids are crying out sick
because when I brought them here
I knew that this world was unfit
Yet overpowered by my love for them 
I became more and more protective
So I blame myself in advance for their sadness
when they finally see that the world is not objective

I blame me for those nights I can't rest
Wondering if my consciousness has finally realized
that I have done my best
to stay positive and have good intentions
So I blame myself when I give in to temptations and my human inhibitions
and begin to feel ashamed of myself
I begin to feel like I don't have enough strength to love myself
because
good things don't happen for me
So I blame me for my thinking and feelings of worthlessness

It's a big world and my lonely soul has no more confidence
I have nothing
I have given up 
and so I blame me for my incompetence and my soul's rut


Details | Carpe Diem | |

Letter to bereaved ones

         I beg your forgiveness for I am not long for this world. Happenstance has led me down this path so crooked and forlorn. Misery has preceded my path and darkened my senses all but torn. Mistakes have illuminated my way though their light be a fallacy; an illusion to comfort a tortured mind, riddled with confusion and false fancy. ‘Tis only just to forgive me sisters, I am not long for this world. 

          An image wreaks havoc with my memory. A picture so horrendous the effects of its trauma echo through the hallways of time. The sight that for all my life I was so grateful to possess, leads me now to curse what gods may be that granted it me. For surely had I never seen the sight of him, cold and lifeless, I would have eventually endeavoured to be healed in my spirit. The fault is mine; it was never him but I that had the capacity to change. ‘Tis only right to forgive me father, I am not long for this world. 

       My middle name should rather have been disappointment. That is all I have ever delivered to her who brought me into the world and nurtured an infant into a lady. I call her Gaia, that is her spirit name.  My existence has put lines on her face prematurely and caused her to despair time and time again. The audacity of me now to leave this earth without ever having produced for her a grandchild. The insolence of leaving only words to counter the preponderance of condolences from rejoicing enemies that shall now assail and abuse her. My soul is repentant, twas never the intent to hurt your heart dear Gaia. ; Tis only compassionate to forgive me mother, I am not long for this world. 

       As for the empty future that awaits me. No children to carry on the memory of me. No great achievements to render my life the content of legend. No great works to immortalise me in poem and prose. No others to mourn the passing of a life most unremarkable. Nothing but things, regrettable decisions, words left unsaid and the cold sound of silence to mark that most auspicious event. Death finds me waiting and unafraid with only the last words to pass from these lips; ‘tis only fair to forgive me self, for we are not long for this world.


Details | Limerick | |

death is good

oh give me a rope
with a noose that is loose 
and i'll tie it up on a beam

then give me a pill
that will give me a thrill 
and i'll end it all on a high

Death Death is the way 
for life is to sucky to play

so give me a gun
that is loaded for fun
and i'll blow my brains far away


Details | Rhyme | |

I Was At the End of LIfe's Road


I felt worn out... discouraged and defeated.
Nothing in my life right  
seemed to be completed. 

I felt alone, knocked down and betrayed!
I never thought I'd feel this scared and afraid. 

In this very dark time, where would I run?
Where would any help actually come from? 

I felt utterly worthless and quite alone...
With each passing day, in this place I called "home." 

As I got up, each morning and opened the bedroom door.
And wondered if anyone cared about me anymore?

I felt a "tug" on my shoulder and looked around.
And noticed a bright light, shining toward the ground. 

"I love you my son." Where the words I heard.
Excitement and hope within my heart was stirred. 

I looked up and couldn't began to explain.
The love I felt when I called on Jesus' name! 

From my ceiling, I saw what looked like an angelic being.
He said, "I am God! “ I can do anything!" 

He reached down and gently picked me up out of bed.
Words of mercy and hope where what he had said. 

"I am here so that you may rise up and live."
"All of your failures and sins I will forgive." 

Everything inside of me... God did understand!
With him here... I knew victory was at hand! 
This particular day, this was certain. 
He took away my sins and heavy burdens! 

Look at me now and it's so plain to see!
He can do for YOU, what he's done for ME! 

By Jim Pemberton


Details | I do not know? | |

Pessimist

How do you expect me to be less of a pessimist and more of an optimist. When you’re pessimistic about my optimism.


Details | Rhyme | |

Do You Feel There's Nowhere to Go

Do You Feel Like There’s Nowhere to Go? I know that it's easy to get discouraged and upset. Feeling “trapped” ... But can't escape "just yet." You've tried everything. And not sure what else to do? Is there someone who can help you through?" Many things you've done. You’ve wanted to be forgiven! Yet struggle with this each day you're livin’! You meet people and wear a "smile." And sometimes wonder if living is really worth the while. You may have prayed over and over again. And yet constantly feel Like you’re “trapped within.” You may have tried to call on Jesus' name. Yet find yourself in "guilt and shame." Jesus is here now! And wants you to know… He can bring peace to your troubled soul. Rather than thinking of things done in the past. Come to Jesus now! His love will always LAST! Allow HIM to bring to your life the needed victory now! He'll make you a brand new person! And HOW! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Lyric | |

In Another Light

The best thing you can do about a suicide is understanding it.

The boy opens the door and walks by his mom
his mom says "how was school"
He doesnt respond 
he walks silently to his room
His mom turns away in sadness
"its dinner time Kurt" she yells up the stairs.
He walks slowly down the steps
Hiding something in his hand as he puts it in his pocket
His mother is setting the table
Putting meat on his plate 
He sits down unto the seat
not touching his food
"is there something wrong with it?" his mom asks
He doesnt look at her
"talk to me. why have you been ignoring me" she repeats.
He gets up off the chair and walks outside
Walking into the woods as his mom runs out
"get back here where are you going"

Every living thing dies alone." he writes in white on a tree in there back yard
He throws the rope over the toughest branch
He steps up unto a little chair
Tying the rope around his neck
The chair falls

His mom worries in panic
She cant find him anywhere
She waits up all night

The Next Morning"

She walks out to the garden
Looking up at a tree
She sees the fallen chair from behind a tall bush
She runs
Picking up the chair
Seeing the thing she never thought would have happened
She falls to her knees
A tear falls from her cheek
Not understanding 
Reading the words on the tree
Every living thing dies alone"
She wonders
Thinking
Crying

She untangles him from the tree and holds him
Talks gentle to him
Something she hasnt done in a while
Now grasping the meaning behind what he has done

The best thing you can do about a suicide is understanding the meaning behind it.


Details | Lyric | |

Running Out

Written September 14, 2011


Is this how I should feel at times like these
Facing crossroads, not ease
RC running miles on plastic tires
And then batteries run dry

Here I lie on a bed of signal fires
Why didn't you stop before the sign
Frozen in time like the watch you didn't wind
I'm bound by thoughts that bind

Am I the dusty classic
Getting shelved in the highest bin
Am I the friend whose forgotten time
Time and again

Is this the way a boy feels
When he's personified again
Is this the way I should feel
Full of regret and gin

Here I lie on a bed of signal fires
Why didn't you stop before the sign?
Frozen in time like the watch you didn't wind
I'm bound by enemies that bind

The days they run on and on
They seem to have no end
I guess that's how it goes
When you're nervous and frozen

Maybe I should have fought the bout
Cause now its as if time is running out
Is this how time is meant to run
So sharp and so high strung

Here I lie on a bed of signal fires
Why didn't you stop before the sign
Stop before the sign
The sign the sign the sign


Details | I do not know? | |

Why me

Why me
Why me dear god 
Why the hell me!
I did all you asked 
I’ve even played the card 
Of a good girl, the one 
Everyone wanted me to be.
Why can’t you save me.
I’m hurting immensely 
And no one care not even slightly.
How could you allow me to fall 
So deep, so far into misery.
I’ve grown to hate myself so much so
I’m that demon within the angel 
That you see.
I’m crying out for help
And not once did you show me sympathy.
Like everyone else you pretend to care
My prayers are just words you refuse to here.
You watched the tears ran down my cheeks
And didn’t send an angel to watch over me.
I don’t want to be part of this world anymore
Just set me free….
Sleeping forever is where I are to be.

05/05/09


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Never Say Goodbye

It was the day you left 
my world fell apart 
lets go back to the day 
before you walked away 
you was going off about something 
but I thought it was nothing 
I told you i never kissed her 
when will you ever learn 
That it was never my fault (never my fault) 
This isn't how i wanted it (its going wrong) 
All grownup but cant take a hit (living a lie) 
Loves not the only thing (hate is next) 
But i could never sing (caught in a lie) 
you never backed me up enough 
you though it was a bluff. 
I'm on this mountain, you and I. 
This was you last goodbye 
so now i'm sitting here 
thinking of suicide (suicide lies within darkness) 
Maybe I should die 
you love was just a lie 
now your gone like a suicide 
deep inside where nasty putrescence resides 
these razor blades are cold (like frostbite) 
Dead on the floor; 
So lifeless, so still, so sold 
I drink this whiskey 
Passing out again; 
why don't u miss me (you never loved me) 
you said that you loved me 
I wasted my time; 
cause you didn't as I see. 
Sudden noises wake me up 
i grab the whiskey and a cup 
what happened to that day at the mall 
i remember it all 
i no its not just in my head 
that day we first kissed 
i was nervous and missed 
yet your heart was calm (this whiskeys dry in my palm) 
everything blew up in my palm 
i just got back up 
that day in the rain 
i had everything to gain 
but instead of being cool 
i lost everything like a fool (I tripped over these stones) 
So hard and hollow 
My life is over 
but this time i'm really sober 
i grabbed the gun 
i put it to my head, oh what fun 
you ran through the door 
i through it to the floor 
i start freaking out 
what is this all about 
you said you was sorry 
and that you was a fool ( you looked just like a kid) 
I looked int you eyes 
i said never say goodbye 
you looked at me (the blood inside me poured) 
I saw that it shall be 
forever you and me 
That's when i never say goodbye!

Name: Patrick Nonnemacher (this is the story of me and my girlfriend)


Details | Rhyme | |

Life is Worth

Life is worth living wherever you are.
Deep in the jungle or high on a star.

Life is worth living if you give it a try.
Even not thinking and wondering why.

Life is not always the way it should be.
Trials and troubles are not always free. 

Sometimes our lives don't always seem right.
you can make it better by learning to fight.

Life is worth living whoever you are.
It's not worth stepping in front of a car.

You can survive it if you stay strong.
Just remind yourself good won't be long.

Keep your chin up and things will be fine.
And don't let the past keep you behind.



Details | Blank verse | |

As The Other Me Takes Over

Society is a reason that has just ran cold,
Like the tempature I'm feeling never seems to get ahold,
The sadness lingers over and the beauty starts to fade,
When I saw all the negative on the news today,
The darkness that is surrounding me has found a new home,
Deep inside my brain it swells trying to kill the bold,
The new found confidence I had seems to have been old,
Like the old man with the cancer that has just got told,
I know he's still with me in my heart and in my soul,
but I just can't stand what this new year has to hold,
Will it be good for me, will I see, 
All the positive, when will the demons stop to breathe?
There like vultures in my body, I can feel them feed,
All this happiness that I held, were they just a dream?
I've found a medicene that will kill the pain, of the hurt I share,
Your pain it scars me like a knife cutting threw the care,
The worry of this generation is not what it should be,
But I was left with a gift, I'm lucky too be me.
Can I be the light, In the darkness?
Can I bare the stake running threw your lungs,
Can I be the air that you breathe when the whole worlds died,
Can I be the tears in the midst of happiness you cried?
 
Please love me now and in return I'll make your life worth while,
and you won't know what is hurt, I'll heal your wounds and take you from your life,
Give you a new start and I'll set things right,
I see the innocense in a noose every single night,
I wish I could pick them off the rope so high,
What would drive them too that point,
I regret the days I spent,
Being so unhappy in the life I live,
I'm trying to be proud in a world where it's scarase,
Where children have no parents,
Where the government is only but single Tyrants,
So make my job easy and give me the knife,
That will kill these lunatics that crave the night,
That don't do whats right,
I will train in the darkness where I'm the only light,
I will rid the world of there parrell and strife.
Please god just save me tonight.


Details | Rhyme | |

Be Her

You see her?
Why don't go be like her?
No one likes you,
so this is what you must do.

You must stop being yourself,
get off of you shelf.
You must please everyone,
to do that, you must be number one.

She's the perfect girl,
you're the no one in the world.
So go ahead, and give yourself away,
since you're going the wrong way.

You are no longer you,
see what you can do.
You are now her,
that's better than what you ever were.


Details | Couplet | |

Painful Fate

Pain splatters teardrops on my brain
No wonder why I’m soaking from misery’s rain
I tried to comfort her and take her under my wing
But every time we talked her words left a burning sting
So I put a pillow over her head
Wishing and waiting for her to be dead
But instead she slapped me into confusion
Is my life real or not? A question that gives me frustration
So I used to hurt myself to know what’s real
I couldn’t even trust the way I feel
And the only feelings that I had are the ones I didn’t want
Like nightmares and relationships; and all the others that shall always taunt
I wanted to drink until I got severely drunk
Maybe that would get me out of this funk
But then I said no; I’m too afraid to be my father
Imagine everyone telling you that you’ll be just like that monster
I’ve been told that like a million times
And I felt like if I was slapped by billions of extremely sour limes
Words that almost made me commit suicide
Everything that broke me and made me fall
Yet didn’t kill me didn’t make me stronger at all
Why do people say things that make no sense?
Are they all lies or is my life just a bit intense
Why would I want to hear that I would be abusing
Backstabbing and abandoning everyone I’m supposed to be loving
And worst of all I look just like the monster that I hate
So I despise myself and my devastating fate
Because from the pain I cannot hide
I would rather put a gun to my head and pull the trigger
And hear my heartbeat quickly get bigger
Fall to my knees and say goodbye
And let my last tears fall from my eyes


Written under the influence of anger and depression


Details | Free verse | |

The Black Abyss

Sinking in deeper,
No way to escape,
The dark and scary Reaper,
Fore told in the Book of Life.

Is this my end?
Will I ever see the light of day again?
No. My wounds, I must mend.
I must find my strength.

Stand my ground,
Face my fears.
Only then will my voice be found
I must survive.

Break the suffocating chains,
Run from the darkness.
Power will fill my veins.
I will Fight!

Fight the painful names,
The horrid memories,
The demented games 
And escape My Black Abyss.


Details | Rhyme | |

EYE Don't See -Part 2-

My eyes
Refuse to see tragedy
My eyes
Marinate in dread…unable to embrace ecstasy 

And I’m left in my solitude…
My eye’s sagging…from endless mourning  
And I’m close to my demise… 
Only to find myself disappear…
When will peace draw near?

You don’t see 
What damage you’ve done
Just let me be
Leave me alone…hand me a gun

I yearn for unspoiled glory
To make me feel perfect once more
I yearn for flawless serenity
To make me feel no regret…don’t ignore
My calls…don’t hang up on me

You don’t see 
What damage you’ve done
Just hear my plea
Listen to my excruciating cries…
Listen to the truth, not the malicious lies  
Our journey has just begun   

And I’m left in my solitude…
Do you hear me weeping?
And I’m close to my demise…
Only to find myself disappear…
When will peace draw near?

Eye can’t handle the stress
Let me release my horrendous distress
Eye can see you making that same mistake
At least MY life isn’t at stake

And I’m left in my solitude…
My eye’s weeping…do You feel my lament
And I’m close to my demise…
Only to find myself disappear…Stepped on like cement
I’m aching with discontent… I abhor this torment    
When will peace scrub off my fear?

I can’t believe my eyes
Your guiltiness flows into me…
I can’t believe I fell for your lies
Your heartless action rape my mind…you don’t see
What my EYES see…

You’ll never see 
How much pressure you put me under
Unchain me from this chamber
And watch me flee…

When will you be set free?


Details | I do not know? | |

Charon's obol

In the shadow, behind the tree, 
on the meadow, bend your knee,
down the valley, up the stream, flat bedrock,
hear me scream, bellow the heavens, toward hell,
dark tunnel, wishing well; fellow traveler listen well,
no chance given, could you tell, 
on a knife-edge, head or tail?


Details | Rhyme | |

I'm Tired

I’m tired…….
	Tired of smiling when I’m dying inside
		Tired of looking for a safe place to hide
			Tired of loving when I am turned away
				Tired of trying to find right words to say

I’m so tired….
	Tired of always trying so hard to please
		Tired of daily feeling ill at ease
			Tired of feeling that I’m so small
				Tired of just waiting for you to call

I’m so very tired...
	Tired of pretending to be alright
		Tired of crying after one more fight
			Tired of seeing unfulfilled desire
				Tired of failures that put out the fire

I’m so very extremely tired…
	Tired of trying hard to measure up
		Tired of drinking this bitter cup
			Tired of wishing beauty to be mine
				Tired of hoping it will all be fine

God, you know I’m tired…
	Tired of wounding You time after time
		Tired of waiting for heaven sublime
			Tired of longing for perfection in me
				Tired of waiting from guilt to be free

I’m tired…
	Maybe you’ll understand the reasons why
		I want you to know, I really did try
			But I’m shriveled up and empty inside
				There is no place left this raw hurt to hide

I’m tired; I have no strength left to stand
	Guess I’m just too proud to reach for your hand
		I wish I could make you really “see” me
			And not this monster that I’ve come to be

I’m tired; I’ve no charm to make love last
	No magic to erase the sordid past
		I’ve learned that life is cruel, mean and unkind
			Happiness was not for me to find.

I’m tired; I can bring this to an end 
	You know it is too hard this heart to mend
		You know I’m much too tired to try to live
			My last breathe of life is all I can give….

I’m TIRED!


Details | Rhyme | |

Jesus, Give Me the Strength to Make It Through


Jesus, Give Me the Strength To Make It Through!

Lord Jesus, please give the strength and power.
To help me to make if through my darkest hour!

In the midst of this darkness…  
I need your guiding light!
With your help…  Everything will be alright!

  I need you now! Like I’ve never needed you before!
Through life’\s difficulties... 
 I need you so much more!

By your strength, and gentle loving hand…
Everything I go through.  I know you understand!

Thank you for the work, in me, that you want to do!
I’d be totally lost right now.  If not for YOU!

You are all that I could hope for!  
 All I ever needed!
With you in my heart…  
My life is totally completed!

You’ve brought me strength and peace within!
I love you so much!  I don’t know where to begin!

You’ll be there for me! Even when everything seems lost!
You sacrificed your life for mine,
 by your death on the cross!

Yes!  Victory over my darkest hour
 has been overcome!
By the power of God! 
 And his risen son!

Thank you Jesus!  In you, my life is totally secure!
You’ll always take care of me!  That’s for sure!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | Rhyme | |

The Little Girl

There was once a little girl everyone called an "old soul"
This little girl had far too much self control
All the time she wanted to beg and cry
To be let out of this life, to be buried under blue sky
But she never did cry to die
Not out loud, but all the time inside
Everyone thought she was just quiet and shy
They had no idea that she wanted to die
Of course you wouldn't think a child of that age
Would be tired of life at this tender stage
But tired she was, tired of the nights
When he would come into her room
And turn off the lights
She wanted to die yes, each and every time
But no one knew and she could not tell
She would just peer over ledges
And wonder "What if I "fell"?
She often wondered how she could "accidentally" leave
Because in her life she only ever grieved
Grieved for her innocence forever lost
She wanted so bad to die at any cost
She did not die though, she was not brave enough
To take her own life no matter how rough
So she just went through the days listlessly wandering
Everyday, every year the same questions pondering
"Why do I continue to live this life
When all it ever had for me is strife?
I'll tell you why, because I' a coward
Too scared to take my life, too scared to be empowered
Too scared to live and be free
Too scared to know the deepest parts of me
I have to do something I can no longer abide
Living everyday just to die inside"
The girl made a promise, to herself and no one else
That she would put her pain on the shelf
She would leave it there and try to forget
Everything that happened, all the torment
There was a life she wanted to live
She decided it would be in her best interest to forgive
Not forgive him, that she could not do
But forgive herself for everything she went through
And try to live the life she always wanted
Being happy and vibrant but not haunted
Haunted by the ghosts of yesterday's past
She hoped she could be happy now, free at last
But the girl did not really believe deep inside
That from her pain she could actually hide
Pain and suffering was all she knew
What if this plan for her life also fell through 
The girl did not know what else to do
So she just went on with the days
Pretending to forget what she had been through


Details | Rhyme | |

bloody red roses part 2

     She lies in a pile of bloody red roses

She left a note to her folks  saying

" I cant go on im sorry"

      It didnt say why

But still we cry

      We are all very sad

some of us are mad

       none of us are glad

She'll b greatly missed

        To me she was like a sis

But when will the rumors stop

        Noone knows the truth not even the cops

My pain is great 

       I wish we hadnt been late

But when we got there 

        there she lay 

on her already made bed of

Bloody red roses


Details | Free verse | |

Overwhelmed

My eyes were overwhelmed
By the beauty of her face
How her hair shone in its bob cut
Not a strand was out of place

And when I walked beside her 
I felt privileged to be there
I’d have walked a thousand miles 
My time with her to share

Yet when she looked into the mirror
A different picture met her eyes
She could see just fat and ugly
And what she called thunder thighs

If I lived another lifetime
Trying to convince her of her mistake
It would have made no difference
She would still be in the lake

Don’t let your mind deceive you
Or others who would tease
You are how you were meant to be
And you have no one to appease 




Details | Rhyme | |

Chrsit Love For Your Pain


Christ can give true love, for your pain!
He has so much to give, in exchange!

He can give a life that’s eternal and secure!
His love for you is everlasting!  That’s for sure!

He offers much more than this world can give!
And will bless you, each day that you live!

He can bring true happiness and much more!
He truly is someone worth living for!

Won’t you accept his love and acceptance?
And come before him in true repentance?

He can take a life that’s been “worn out.”
And do a total cleansing all throughout!

He’s the alpha and omega! 
 The beginning and the end!
And will be here to help!  
When you need a friend!

Won’t you give him a chance today?
And allow him to take all pain and sin away?


By Jim Pemberton


Details | Free verse | |

Solitary Darkness

Here I sit in the cold darkness, alone
All I ever wanted is for someone to care
But compassion for me, no one has shown
Everyone else is happy, this isn't fair

Cast out by the group, denied and ignored
Tired of trying to find a solution
No option of mine mine are left unexplored 
Hope tainted, like a lake afflicted by polution

Why be in a place where I’m not accepted?
Forced to watch with a green chip on my shoulder
Condemned to always be forgotten and rejected
From jealousy and envy my soul begins to smolder

There is only one place I belong
Prepare your mind to be blown
Or perhaps you knew all along
Here in the darkness I shall sit forever alone


Details | Classicism | |

IN DEFENSE OF SUICIDE


                                           IN DEFENSE OF SUICIDE

                           In this still room devoid of human voice,

                           Where imagination bends the knee to king of choice,

                           And ever vibrant memories dwell,

                           Bounce with delicious ease from heav’n to hell;

                           Why find return to daily chores?

                           Why interact with twits and boors?

                           Why not forsake me—let me be?

                           Why not remand me to eternity?



Victoria Anderson-Throop
2013


Suicide in ancient Greece (and many other cultures)was not considered a crime. It was often a choice of honor.


Details | Free verse | |

Summer School

One year I went to a summer school. 
And there was a girl there 
With shining eyes and
An award winning smile. 
She was kind to everyone and 
Excluded no one. 
She always laughed with others
But you could go to her when you 
needed it.
We talked for hours and
Quickly became friends. 

Last year I went back to summer school. 
The girl was still there. 
She had sad eyes but
Kept the award winning smile. 
She was kind to everyone yet
Excluded herself. 
She never laughed properly 
But you could always go to her 
when you needed it. 
We talked for mere minutes and
I guess I lost a friend. 

This year when I went to summer 
school
The girl was no longer there.
Rumours of suicide surrounded
Her name
And no one was kind to us all.
Everyone excluded their-selves.
Silence consumed every thought and moment
Because no one was there when we 
truly needed it. 
Memories of talking haunted me and
I couldn't help but miss my friend.


Details | Rhyme | |

I Was Told That I Wasn't Any Good

 
I Was Told I Wasn’t Any Good I heard the devil whisper into my ear… “You’re no good!” “Come over here!” In front of me, where discouragements of various kinds... At first, it was almost overwhelming for my mind! He promised something “better,” than what I already had! He said that if I did what he wanted… I’d be happy and glad! I asked how Jesus to help the way I’m livin.’ The life I’ve lived… And HIS power of forgivin.’! Would I trade all of this, for a life of stress and sin? Perhaps having a form of happiness, but no freedom within? Was I going to trade what God gave, for a ”pleasure of the moment?” Was I about to make a mockery of Christ’ atonement? I ran, and bowed my head and cried… For a brief moment, I felt rejected and despised! I felt the Holy Spirit’s presence all around me! And then, it was like the love of Jesus had filled me! This time, I knew that what I had, was all I needed! With Christ in my life, I no longer have to be defeated! Satan is a liar! He has one purpose and goal! He wants nothing more, than to destroy my soul! Take notice Satan! This is what I proclaim! Everything I ever need! I have in Jesus’ name! The blessings from Jesus, has supplied my every need! It’s an everlasting and abundant life, that I received! Thank you Jesus! For giving what I need and more! You are truly wonderful! And are worth living for! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Free verse | |

It's Not Your Fault

The thing about life
is that
it can end in an instant

When the rope of the
harsh words
wraps tightly around your 

Neck squeezing tighter
and tighter
you just want to jump

To end it all to end all
the pain
and the hatred and words

It is not only the words
that push
you over the edge

It is too the fists and
the feet 
that slam into you

Over and over
without
a break with out letting up 

Making you break down and slide down
the wall
and cry and cry and cry

One phone call can 
save a
live, stopping that jump

Stopping the self hate
and
spreading the love

The love i have for 
you will 
never fade or die and i hope

will make you better
to sleep
and to be able to be 

Happy again to 
be happy
forever and always with me

just remember and know
that it's
NOT YOUR FAULT


Details | I do not know? | |

Suicide

Triangle Squares and crooked lines
Imagine this within the minds
Of those confused and lost in a way
I can't put in words
I can't even say
They were brought in this world for a reason I know
Maybe to suffer maybe to show
How lucky we are to be free from a state
Of mental confusion
Destruction high rate
Suicide.....


Details | Rhyme | |

How Much Longer Will I Last

Will my life last, much longer?
What am I doing?  I began to wonder…

Many things keeps dragging
 me further down…
What’ll I do?  There’s no one around???

Many “things” have 
  a hold on me…
I cry every night…  I want to be FREE!

I’ve tried and tried…  But to no avail…
Just when I think I have victory…  I fail!

I’ve read in scripture of a power
 I haven’t seen.
I read of a lord who
 can do ANYTHING!

I’m going to give him a try! 
 I’ve nothing to lose!
I’ve been so hurt, worn out and abused!.…

To you, dear Jesus… 
 I confess my every sin.
I can feel your love
 from deep within!

Thank you Jesus! For giving
 me a joy I never knew…
I don’t know where I’d be if not for YOU!

You’ve brought to my life
 a peace I never had.
For all you’ve done for me.  I’m so glad!

Won’t YOU give your burdens
 to the one, I call friend?
And experience the joy of being born again?

Please come to him now!  
Why not this hour?
And experience his life-changing power!

By Jim Pemberton  


Details | Rhyme | |

The Value Of Life

Whatever happened to the Values of humanity? 
No one Wants to fight for thy sanity Or conquer 
vanity. There’s so many suicides, homicides and
human sacrifice, it’s like No one wishes to survive 
or remain alive. 

Even kids are taught at such young age God has
legalized to agonize and commit vile crimes. Whatever 
happened to fighting  for humanity the values of life has 
done down with brutality; since when did been criminal 
like ISIS become righteous.   


Details | Couplet | |

love starved

If love is a hunger.Then my heart is 
empty.The pains run deeper then 
the pacific ocean floor.So many 
lovers my heart feels like a revolving 
door.I ask my mother to feed me 
cause i    hunger for her love .She 
gave me the left over scraps from 
my sisters and brother.barely 
enough to stop the pain.I ask my 
father to feed me and he only feeds 
my mother ,and when he 
remembers that I have no love he 
says hes fresh out.I asked my 
husband to  feed me .But he cant 
even make food.He gives me a 
dinner mint of lust .It disappears as 
soon  as it touches my 
lips.Countless lovers taking from an 
already starved heart. The inner 
parts of my heart consumed by the 
love given but never received.My 
heart is just and empty hollow lining 
.So empty the hunger pains can 
never be felt again.


Details | Rhyme | |

Do You Blame Or Trust God


Do You Blame Or Trust God? Do you blame God for the trials you may face? Do you reject God’s mercy and grace? Perhaps you are in a most “difficult situation.” You can’t figure out a “reasonable explanation?” You may feel abandoned, alone and afraid. There may have been times when you prayed. You don’t know why this happening to you? You probably try your best in all that you do! But, it still things really haven’t worked out. And you often wonder what life is all about? Rather than blaming God… Why not trust him? He’s not your enemy! He wants you to know him! He’s not the blame for the sorrows of mankind! He’s always faithful, most loving and kind! He patiently waits for anyone to call on his name! With him in control… Things won’t be the same! He is here! Even if everyone else fails you! If you give him a chance! He wants to help you! Won’t you take the time, and invite him in? This is where a new opportunity can begin! His life for yours, is what he gives in exchange! He can help your situation to really change! He can change your life! And turn it around! And can put your life on a solid ground! By Jim Pemberton


Details | I do not know? | |

Abuse

Trapped. No where to hide.You scream at me through the door.Though your words still 
sting me.
I sit on the ground alone.Blood drips down like tears. tears run down like rain.The room's 
spinning.  My heart bursts out of my clothes.We got into a fight.  Why is unclear.
I tried to leave.  You hit me. I fell.I started to cry.  You kicked me.A sharp pain burst out of 
my chest.  I could not breath. I have little energy,I kicked you.  You fell. I ran to our 
bedroom.
I am trapped.  No where to hide.I'm weak. I stumble to your Night stand.I see a gun.You 
break down the door.  I grab the gun.You start to choke me, squeezing my throat like you 
were trying to get some sort of juice out of me.
I pull the trigger.
BANG!Trapped.  No where to hide.Your grip feels looser.   Your face in pain.
You fall down. i fall into darkness.Free.  No need to hide.


Details | I do not know? | |

I Stand On The Threshold

Silent tears that no one sees....
A broken heart that no one can sense....
A soul crying to the world....
      but no one is listening. 
There are times when death 
seems to be a welcome friend....
With promises of no more pain...
      no more disappointments.....
         no more feeling as if 
                       all my efforts
                               are meaningless. 
And so a prisoner of my emotions
       I am trapped in a world
            that no longer belongs to me. 
I am a prisoner in this life.....
       A cell mate in this body
           where many prisoners reside. 
And I cry in the silence of my soul
      where no one can truly understand
                          This tortured shell.
And so as I continue to show the world
            this false facade of bravery and strength.....
   Inside- death is mocking me... 
                    Tempting me....
                          Inviting me.....
And in fear of the unknown.... I fight!
I stand on the threshold....
On one side- I see a life of those I love who will never understand
                        how deep are the wounds within my soul.
On the other side- A promise of rest and relief....
            An opportunity to know an unending peace.....
A chance of rescuing those I love
         from having to deal with this
                                     tormented soul. 
I stand on the threshold.... 
          Not sure which way to go.


© Amada Gonzalez


Details | I do not know? | |

Suicidal Comforts

 I pace alone in a place for the dead…Over come by woe… Yet here I’ve grown so fond of 
dread that I swear its heaven… Oh my sweet May dressed in grief Don’t cry in front of his 
stone with his name scrawled in a severed hand I look at you through tired eyes and see 
tears fall like shards of glass that bond In rivers like sinners thoughts weep with me to join 
the damned A darkened sky the day that laughter died fell swiftly into night and stayed 
within her sight I set staring at the knife oh god how easy now the sacrifice of my life but let 
her be with me He’s bid Farwell to distant thunder those inept stars we worshiped under 
falling friends falling father lie in wait in flames below whilst my love a blood red flower falls 
calls to me from verdant bowers graveside I cry please save us from the hell you’ve known 
A darkened sky the day that laughter died fell swiftly into night and stayed within her sight I 
set staring at the knife oh god how easy now the sacrifice of my life but let her be with me 
An eye for an eye espied in the bible my faith is lost to burning idols one less cross to press 
upon the survival of this lorded agony and I as much as I have tried to bury him from my 
mind fates tourniquet was tied when he died lithe arms around his throat like pinning swans 
entwined his foot falls always like night fall next to mine Suicide is a tried and tested formula 
for release He snatched her whisper like the wind through cascades see her face in every 
natural feature midst the mist and sleepy hollows of forever with glee deceiving he Suicide is 
a tried and tested formula for release I hear his voice from where the grave defines him 
siren song to sing alone no finer suicidal notes harmonized in a minor strike the cords with 
misery memories let us be let his soul rest in peace

                                                                                        (Together we cry)
                                                                      In memory of those lost Written by Casper


Details | Blank verse | |

IT IS NICE THAT LIFE LASTS LONGER THESE DAYS

IT IS NICE THAT LIFE LASTS LONGER THESE DAYS
THAN LONG AGO
WHEN THE GRIM REAPER COMES TO TAKE US AWAY WITH HIM 
TO WHEREVER
WE  NOW FIND OURSELVES PRETTY WORN OUT AND HAPPY TO GO WITH HIM

EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE YOU ENCOMPASS THE FEELING THAT LIFE IS WORTH LIVING
AND TRY TO KEEP IN THE ZONE 
IT IS A FALSE HOPE
BUT THE ONLY HOPE OF SURVIVING
THIS WORLD WITHOUT MEANING

WE STRUGGLE TO FIND THE MEANING OF LIFE
WE LISTEN TO OTHERS
WE READ BOOKS AND 
WE GO BACK INTO HISTORY
AND TAKE OUR FOUND TRUTHS 
AND PROJECT THEM INTO THE FUTURE

EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE YOU ENCOMPASS THE FEELING THAT LIFE IS WORTH LIVING
AND TRY TO KEEP IN THE ZONE 
IT IS A FALSE HOPE
BUT THE ONLY HOPE OF SURVIVING 
THIS WORLD WITHOUT MEANING

IT IS NICE THAT LIFE LASTS LONGER THESE DAYS
THAN LONG AGO
WHEN THE GRIM REAPER COMES TO TAKE US AWAY WITH HIM 
TO WHEREVER
WE NOW FIND OURSELVES  PRETTY WORN OUT AND HAPPY TO GO WITH HIM


Details | I do not know? | |

Scars

Wounded by the words of hate 
For you to change I will not wait 
I guess I was the one you didn't need 
Too blinded by your ego and greed 

Its the same thing with all you guys 
Filling my head with all your lies 
Telling myself that all is well 
While words were said that bite and yell 

You never hit me; you wouldn't dare 
But you left scars if you care 
Scars that constantly try to hide 
Scars that are forever burned inside 

The days I'm unhappy to be alive 
Are days when thoughts of you arrive 
Days when i pull my hair and yell 
Knowing, of course, nothings well 

A new idea like smoking pot 
Brings my mind to other thoughts 
Scars that are forever burned inside 
Bring thoughts and attempts of suicide 

Your memories have made me insane 
Constant thoughts and constant pain 
From memories of you I cannot hide 
Bringing scars to the outside 

Knowing of course nothings well 
An apology you came to tell 
But wounded by the words of hate 
A sorry from you came too late. 

All this time you always knew 
Haunting you what i went through 
Memories of my awful life will burn inside 
Until you drive yourself to suicide 

Two lives filled with scars and hate 
Was it chance, or was it fate 
At least the pain and wounds are no more 
Two lives ended ends a war.

_By Tamara Brown_


Details | Prose Poetry | |

Untitled 8

Appearing from nowhere, a red stain in my colourless 
vision, I found them cold in the whiteness of the first 

snowfall. They lay there in the misty haze, stunned to silence,
smothered in their white blanket; that splendid state 

beyond shivering. All the swans are dead, their bodies 
melt, reclaimed by the snow. I watch myself in their vacant eyes,

staring out at me, as if I’m some kind of god- the sun’s 
sparkle has faded; black mirrors, an onyx iris. With wings

contorted, they lay limp, their broken necks hanging like empty white bags, 
their once-upon-a-time white feathers twitching in the wind, the veins

on their sagging skins unwrapped, all speckled with flashes 
of ruby, brighter than fire, and just as untameable. This

scalded mess looks at me; the ends molt through, peeping like scared 
children, and crawl along my frozen skin; it’s almost

pleading, the red ocean growing and overflowing, staining 
the pinking dirt. They are all equal here, entwined in strands that slither

like embracing fingers, numb to the bone from the biting frost; iced
to perfection, inseparable chunks. From high above in the black sky, he saw

it all, creaming with knowledge- watching through his terrible spyhole,
that ghostly hue that bones this new aurora’s gleam with sallow blemishes.

This scene infects me; I circle the remains in awe and continue; this sight’s 
colouring me green:  it is over; they are finished, laying in the soiled snow.


Details | Narrative | |

The Addiction Of Bipolar

I wake to cold sweats scratches
From Sleeping on this broken mattress
Outside is cold but its my home, My palace
My brain crashes from this addiction
I so I need that fix to get me back high
I'm trying to fix the broken pieces missing inside
I've seen heroin take my best friends life
Yet I still inject it, Why? 
Why wont this addiction just Roll over
Now I'm diseased with this thing called bi polar
A world trapped in eternal sadness
For others beautiful for some so numb
While I'm covered in an eternal blackness
They say I need to take these pills before 
I turn to madness
But there my thorn digging my side
As sharp as a cactus 
No wonder I have this cuts of pure madness
Because it aches stomach pains Nausea vomiting, Insomnia
Give me a story of drama
But then my dis honer
Had to cut my wrist to see that this blood
is thicker than is vodka
Slowly sinking under water
Holding a ton of bricks on my shoulder
Only makes me stronger
In order to move on we have to see the rain
live through the pain
before we get that sunshine once again!


Details | Rhyme | |

Help me

I remember how you were that day

make it happen or i’ll make you pay

is what you said before i went

away…

Seems like now the tides have turned

onto the platform in which you burned

maybe it wont fall this time

maybe… 

Leave me be when i’m not here

make me sway, make me hear

the reason why i’m not living 

the truth…

So here I stand drifting away

into the abyss where they all lay

holding regrets and promises

alone…

But there it is

that bright white sight

something's whispering behind me “choose the light”

should I listen?

should I stay?

help me…


Details | Rhyme | |

bloody red roses part 1

        A shot rang out,

it became quiet,

         she tried to scream 

but out came nothing

         she tried to move

But she soon realized she was paralyzed with fear

         All of a sudden 

she saw herself 

        Looking down upon herself

She tried yelling for help

       But then she saw it

It was in her hand

       Then she realized she did something

something she promised herself she would never do

       Noone knows why she's gone 

Nor what happened

       All they know is that she pulled the trigger

on herself while layin in a bed of

Bloody Red Roses


Details | I do not know? | |

Untitled

Have you ever been so angry?
That you can’t express hurt?
When the highlight of your day
Becomes your downfall.

I’ve flirted with disaster
Destruction became part of me.
I have no one to blame 
For I am my own misery.
05/23/08


Details | Rhyme | |

Satan Wants Me to Be Destroyed And Defeated

Satan Wants Me to Be Destroyed And Defeated!

Satan wants me destroyed and defeated…
So God’s will in my life, won’t be completed

He wants to see me “up against a wall.”
And wants to be there, when I “stumble and fall.”

He wants for my life to “crash to the ground.”
And he doesn’t want any help to be around!

He wants my life to come to a “screeching halt.”
And then try to tell me, it’s all of my fault!

He wants to see every good thing to be destroyed.
He doesn’t want God’s truth to ever be employed!

He’ll twist the truth into any way that he can!
Anything of God…  He doesn’t want me to understand!

He wants to corrupt what I’ll do and say!
And wants to take everything wholesome away!

I need to listen and trust Christ to overcome!
I can do it, through the blood of God’s son!

With him as my Lord, Satan will have to flee!
I seek the blood of Jesus to daily protect me!

A invite you Jesus to complete your will in my life!
And ask for your blessings upon my family and wife!

I seek Jesus!  Behold his awesomeness and power!
Jesus is the victor!  Satan is defeated this very hour!

Thank you Jesus! For redeeming my soul!
Because of your shed blood…  
Satan has to go!!!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | Free verse | |

Fin

She turns up the music to hide the sobs
Blade meets wrist for a final encounter
Red tears come streaming, staining the ground as they fall
Silence encompasses the room despite all of the noise


Details | Rhyme | |

Will God Accept Me


Will God Accept Me?

I had nothing to offer to God but a life of  shame.
I was embarrassed of the mention of my name

I had nothing to offer to God but “failure.”
I didn’t know if he listened to me prayer?

I had a life that was just falling apart.
I often cried from a wounded heart.

I began to blame myself for things going wrong.
I began to feel like I didn’t belong.

I’d begin each day with a lot of stress and tension.
I didn’t feel any kind of love or appreciation.

Many of my friends began to “leave me behind.”
There wasn’t a single “friend” I could find!

Just when everything was falling around me...
Jesus was there!  His love began to surround me!

“Lord, please help me!” Where the words spoken.
My life was coming apart!,   And was empty and broken!

Jesus reached down and took a hold of my hand!
And told me everything I went through...  He understands!

Day by day he brought to me a peace I never knew!
Putting my life back together was what he wanted to do!

As I read his word, his spirit renewed my mind.
A precious friend in HIM…  I was able to find!

He accepted me! And gave so much more!
He truly is what living my life is meant for!

He is and will always be the Lord for me!
And can do the same for you!  Most certainly!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | I do not know? | |

Christmas

T'was the night before Christmas
And all through the house not a single noise could 
be heard
For, you see, the only one up
Had practise of being quiet 
even when she's screaming inside
With hand over mouth,
and tears streaming down her face
She silently sobbed the night away
The only festive colour running from her wrists
The only thing she wanted for Christmas
Was to be dead.


Details | Quintain (English) | |

Irreversible Reaction

	
Women in Afghanistan Commit Suicide to Escape Domestic Violence

It is estimated that 2,300 Afghan women attempt suicide every year, reports National Geographic. Between March 2009 and March 2010 alone, an estimated 103 Afghan women set themselves on fire, reports the Ministry of Women's Affairs in Time Magazine. Most women are successful in their efforts. It is believed that more than 80% of women who attempt suicide by fire or self immolation die, reports Time Magazine. ( Women's Revolution, Sunday, January 16, 2011)



By the side of you, rest of your life
She vowed you to share grief and strife
To be together until depart by death
She was the one who kept on you  faith

Happy moments added to days and years
She brought up precious sons and daughters
To ease your life with every gladness
She swallowed silently any bitter soreness

She was to welcome weary you at the door
You were in torment, she made it pass slow
She assured  when you suppressed in fate
She was really your faithful soul mate

Beach parties at every Saturday night
Camping, surfing and adventurous flight
For your own pleasure along aims of life
Had you ever been nonchalant on your wife?

For a slight mishap, you abused her a peak
Ending arguments with lavish slaps on cheek
Hiding your blunders raised arrogant voice
Had you ever been egoistic on  her face?

Deprived love in her own grand  kingdom
Tortured her mind at each and every blink
Agony buried in her heavy heart fathom
It might compel her to make own life sink

Could you bloom a lovely fresh  blossom
From its cleaved petals  gone  withered?
She was merely a fragrant satin blossom
Why did you let her life untimely fade?

Swarnapali Liyanage
10/08/2011


Details | I do not know? | |

THE SUICIDE OF HENRY B, DAMD

     "The Suicide of Henry B. Damned!"
Between the edge of secrecy
and seething brink of lunacy
there went I to the very deepest
       darkest part of me!
I preyed upon my bleakened soul
to bring an end--this was my goal
to every thing that keeps me breathing
       deep inside of me!
But in the darkened night of it
I pained--and then I flenched a bit
and what it does to keep me going
        is my mystery--
Before the end that was my cause,
the cutting edge it slip--I pause!
my hesitation's left it beating
         keeping life in me!
Within it--my own misery
I bring sorbented hope in me
to end this cursed life defeating
         all the will in me!
And blackening my mind, I show
the blade just where it has to go
to cut the very heart that's beating
         cursed life in me!
(the SHADOW knows---ha ha ha HA HA
© ron wilson aka vee bdosa the doylestown poet


Details | Free verse | |

Adflicto

I just want to curl up and away
Forever lost in the land of dreams.
Where is that happy land of sunshine?

Lost in a perpetual storm; am I
The storm or is it around me?

The dark Beast forever stalking my
Light, my life of laughter, smiling.

I thought I was safe but then
The grief tore my soul apart
Once again, I was broken, ruined.

The circles, the fears and desires
All mockery of me, the joke.

Escape but not for me, chained to 
Walls of the pit I’ve fallen into.

Too much of everything yet not
Enough and the paradox is heartless.

Raving mad and angry at the world,
At life so cruel and beautifully still.

A hope, a whisper so frail like frost
In the shining light of angry morning.

What am I, anyway, except thoughts
And a bundle of torn up skin?

Tired and wracked with thoughts so dark,
Peace must be found or I shall

Break. 


Details | Free verse | |

You will never truly know how I feel

Ever have those days
where everything in the world
just seems to go wrong
 
where no one is talking
no one will listen 
and no one really cares
 
you are yelling 
and screaming 
and no one seems 
to even look your way
 
that happens all to often
you have your "bestfriends"
but they never seem to listen
when you truly need it most
 
why do they only come to you
when they need something
when they need it
never there for you
 
sometimes it seems like 
you are just all alone in this world
and everything is wrong


Details | Rhyme | |

Suicide Is Not the Answer


Lately, I have noticed a very disturbing trend.
Many people wish for their life to end!

There are many circumstances
that bring this about.
Many feel "trapped in," and think
"there's no way out!"

I admit,...  I have been very
discouraging thoughts.
Sometimes, wondering, if I was dealt
"the wrong lot."

But just when I feel alone
and trapped within.
I think about Jesus! He's always
been my friend!

I've called to him more than a time or two...
When I didn't know
"what I was going to d."

When, to him, I cried out and pleaded...
He's given to me the hope
and direction I needed!

I recommend this same Jesus
to your life today!
Whatever your problem...
He has made a way!

An abundant assurance
Is what Jesusbrings!
He is an awesome God!
And can take care of everything!

Your problems are never too big
or small for him to take control.
He can bring healing to you!
And make your body whole!

He is what's needed! In this lost
and dying generation!
Won't you accept his mercy
and salvation???

By Jim Pemberton   2012





Details | I do not know? | |

words

Words Words can make you hurt, Words can make you cry. Words can make you laugh, 
Words can make you try. Words can change you and Words can make act wrong. Words 
can hurt others. But words that hurt are nothing new. Words with action is. Because some 
actions can hurt and make pain come. Some actions can make you feel happy and loved. 
Some actions can get you down the wrong road. But whatever happens, with words or 
actions Remember that friends and people have feelings Try listening to them Friends can 
make you laugh when your sad. They can catch you when you fall. No friend lets you die Or 
leaves you in a dark corner to cry. Friends are angels from above. They are there for you. 
So if their is one thing from this that you remember is should be this, Don't say your my 
friend one moment, Then hurt me and leave me to die the next.


Details | I do not know? | |

Adieu

The night so cold and dark
The stars hidden can't see them spark
Moon light covered with thick cloud
Howling I heard sounds so loud

Inside the bush and thick forest
I found hungry and vicious beast
No one dares for they are scared 
On that giant tree awaits the bear

Life so cruel, suffered for so long
Don't know why it went so wrong
No one cares no one understood 
Can't find somebody, no one to hold

Always hiding it's hard to breath
So in despair, so close to death
Can't stop it now, can't hold it longer
Felt like they're pulling me under

Just wishing this life would end
Forgive me loved ones to you i send
For I die never seen a single light
The Life I wanted far from my sight

Twinkle, twinkle little star
How I wish.....but it's so far
Tonight's the time to say goodbye
Sing me a song....a lullabye.....

By: Leila Mijares 
March 1, 2013


Details | Free verse | |

Mistake

( MISTAKE )

I must admit that I have often thought
of leaving it all behind and letting everything go

I was lost and alone, as I always am,
So many people around me,
Yet no one seems to care.

They say they understand and love me very much,
But just when I Trust to love, they forget and move on.

I held the knife so close 
as tears, mixed with blood,
Began to fall slowly.
Like a foolish child I cried.

Knowing that I could end it all now
made my mind draw a blank.

I put the knife away and tried to wipe the blood,
that ran faster than I can describe.

I knew suicide wasn't the answer I was looking for.
I knew there was a reason for me being alone.

So many bad things happening at once -
They can make you forget
About the good qualities of life.

Even though life is hard,
and trouble an inevitable part of it.

If you decide to leave it all behind,
maybe you will,
but I can guarantee that others 
....Your Mistake will haunt

(c) Jasmine Paul 11-22-2014 <3


Details | Rhyme | |

Torn Pride

 I sit here, once again with tears in my eyes
A sad individual, a waste of a life
How can i feel like this, I'm suppose to be proud
A sunny day, unreachable by clouds
 
But I've fought, I've fought so hard
These emotions won't stay away
Each time my heart falls short of it's goal
And tears want to run down my face

I feel as if I'm all alone, no one shares my pain
This sadness, this weakness, I'm so ashamed
I tell myself to toughen up, stand strong
But my pride has been beaten for too long

I sit here, broken and torn
Listening to songs as i morn
I have no wish to try again, for i have yet to heal
But i know i can't stop what my heart feels

I cry saddened by my unaccepted love
I cry, angered because that's not what a man does
I tell myself its ok to cry
But i hate this feeling, i hate this life


Details | Rhyme | |

You're Important to God

You’re important to God!  And he knows it!
He wants to be with you!  His word shows it!

Your life belongs to God!  Yes it does!
He died for you!  It’s you that he loves!

Your life is precious of God!  Yes it is!
He wants to be with you, each day you live

Your life is just a heartbeat away!
From allowing God to change you today!

Your life is but a brief moment in time!
Won’t you take time for God?
  So merciful and kind!

Your life can be touched this very hour!
By God’s love and healing power!

Your life for his!  A choice can be made!
This is beautiful!  And worth the trade!

HIS life brings peace and hope within!
The beauty of him, forgiving your sin!

HIS life for yours, is what he gives in exchange!
You can find all you need, in HIS sweet name!


By Jim Pemberton


Details | Free verse | |

Gregory

Gregory, Just an average man, with no secret…

His life was all in order, no son, no wife, no daughter…

He was known for slaughter, not too many people know this…

He keeps a list, everyone, including the mistress…

He has no weapon, only his little, stupid thoughts…

Gregory had a talent no one else knew of…

He could sing, sing till’ the cows came home!

But once Gregory made his change, he was not the same…

He was always finding things to blame, thinking life was a game…

You could say that Gregory was the same…

Until the night he walked into the freeway lane…

Maybe Gregory was a little insane, maybe he was a little hue…

But smarter than most, he never knew how to smile…

He tried and tried, but to society he was a ghost…

His little, stupid thoughts covered his emotions…

Gregory always thought of why he was here…

Gregory started to taste alcohol, it started as beer…

Ended as Heroin, his words always were…

At least I’m someone…

He laughed; Gregory knew that was a bad assumption…

No family to call, Gregory started taking his problems elsewhere…

And his little, stupid thoughts were right there beside him…

He grabbed his grandmother’s wicker basket…

His only words were…

“Fantastic…”


Details | I do not know? | |

Alone Waiting to Die

Alone waiting to die the world is just to much to bare.
My life has no meaning just pain , hate of my passed it eating at my bones.
The waiting is just to hard I will just take my life. End the pain 
my  God why me it just to much . no one wants to love me to hold me they just do not 
understand , the pain that’s been handed to me from this world of hate. I cant bare 
anymore, someone help me. I waiting to die the pills are overwhelming my body 
and slowly kill me. I am  dying and no one cares I am sick of all of it 
my life this world screw it all. I am waiting to die and suicide is my only way out 
no one wants to listen to my cries for help or care if I live or die. 
so I going to leave and die no one knows why but me and God. So I am 
going to commit suicide and no one know why I am alone and waiting to die  
suicide  the y all we wonder why ..   


Details | Free verse | |

On the Bus

“I want to stand with you,
Another day,
Just take my hand,
It’ll be okay...”

She’s singing on the bus
And I’m dying watching her on YouTube
Because she’s lying
Because she’s promising a lie
Because she’s singing to me

Saying all that I wish to say

And maybe I just wasn’t made to be loved...
Maybe I was just put here to be...
And maybe I just wasn’t made to love...
Maybe I was just created to live in perpetual hell...

Its 2:32 in the morning and the wind is howling outside my window
Still it’s nothing compared to the howling inside my soul

I drowned once... so long, long ago...and tonight I just wish I finished what I started...followed through

Frost is forming on the wall beside my head
Shimmering on the pillow where I rest my dead midnight shaded skull
But apathy has set in
In these shivers I know I’m just going to fall asleep
To dream of that morning when I was drowning
To relive that moment when my lungs were on fire
To breathe in those final heartbeats when my eyes cried out in agony
To wake in the lingering pulse of one final beat
When all around me lay peace and tranquility

It’s so hard...so hard...


Details | Free verse | |

Evil Never Ceases


like a hole
in a bucket
that’s always
leaking,
or a faucet
that’s always
dripping,

evil never
ceases
till death 
do us
part

like a brief
memory lapse
that’s always
evident,
or a faux pas
that’s always
awkward,

evil never
ceases
till death 
do us
part

like a uneasy
malaise
that’s always
present
or an incurable
addiction,

evil never
ceases
till death 
do us
part


© Eugene Harvey


Details | Bio | |

Let it go

Blinded by lies, chains and barricades. 
Contemplating suicide becuse things remain the same. Haunted by the past but 
living through the days. 
Fear of the shadow's cast being molded by the clay. Enabling you to stop me 
when I want to grow. 
Accept my words and hear my plea.
There's something you ought to know. 
I'm letting you go. 
I can't be held back, I've made up my mind.
This isn't an attack, but I'm leaving you behind.
I'm not contemplating suicide or being held back by 
pain. 
Content with the present, happily living through my
days. 
Not worried about what it meant when you said "It's
just a phase." 
Not allowing you to stop me; I'm making myself move on. 
Do you agree to disagree? I've got this battle won. I've let you go.


Details | Free verse | |

She sells Suicide

She sells suicide in the mirror i see
by the seashore dark lady
how i adore her
arch angel say it if you want
that whore its allright
she sells herself black magic
by twelve
arms open wide laugh
and i know i got a knew flame
im gonna buy a brand new dance
the most amazing show on earth
dark angel if you will
because she sells suicide from new orleans
suicide from down below something i been missing

all the things she said
something special

perfume i wont take to kindly to

she sells sundials and daisie
bad scratches in seriuous ways
I'll run
and her thoughts make me crazy
she sells jokes and smiles
make it all worth the while
and the gun was in my hand
lend me my light liar liar liar
and ask the page through the tinted glass
has love brought me to a higher place
does she realy truly 
surely she does
she sells suicide in a darkened room
even to the saddest of us clowns
the ones that get down and pray

the ones that care to no longer to save the day
wont turna card up anymore

when all the merry men clapped 
have company they shouldnt have
gypsie music
begging us once to marry them
im a mistake in the past
the brew was gone
Liar liar
string our dreams along
and im coming clean to gypsie music

Im thinking ill be alright and wheres my reason
till we have heaven in sight
say it if you choose
she sells suicide everyday
this im sure
she sells suicide
i want some more
to know more of myself
suicide for the rich
the down beat the trodden
the happy and the poor
very close to you 
I'll find it in you 
and secretly true
the queen and the three
i wish you could have seen my face
lend thee thy light
she sells it by the truck full
she sells it to bangkok
while you pray
and yore wont take to kindly to it

she sells suicide
to forgotten faces
laughing and dancing
like the sound of my voice
i heard it was true
liar liar liar
the black two eyed jack
I'll fight
but never thought id see it like this before


Details | I do not know? | |

My life story

do you think stephen king could do this?
write a ghost story about a police situation that gets out of control
a metaphor of overcoming fears we know as evil
in the hands of intelligence
with the metaphors of subtlety
a writer's protest for those confused and about to make a terrible choice
the theme of denial and throwing your life away page by page

A story about a mental institute
a patient driven crazy by a peculiar gift
trying to warn society of a terrorist
and no one believes him
medicated and overmedicated
as his illnesses keep changing
writes the word tidal wave and the next day one happens

A story of a torture victom
whose birthday and name
is a loveless musical message of genocide
could he base this on a historical family
and the discovery of why there is a ghost

Could he ensure a happy ending
for the brainwashed victom of societies torure
who thinks he is the meaning of life
could you incorperatre a way to break history's patterns from repeating themselves?

Good luck king
do my life justice
there will be no other story you can write as terrifying as this
you could incorperate the facts
sex used as a weapon to euthenise somebody
who just tried to commit suicide on their birthday
someone who had been held hostage
and then beat by cops

i was there for your birthday
my suicide i wish not to attend
but it's inevitable if you don't try

goodbye king


Details | ABC | |

SUICIDE DRUG

The connfessions smelt of whiskey
but I felt the same, wished you'd kiss me
We talked of feelings that are forbidden
So we tuck them away, keep them hidden
I'm craveing a buzz, your my suicide drug
When with you I feel this high
Inhale softy, release a sigh
My addiction is the dept in your eyes
though I'm unsure my feelings are wise
I'm craveing that buzz, your my suicide drug
We get closer and share escape
If this is a dream I hope never to wake
I taste a trance and the world fades away
this hunger fuels my evey day
I'm craveing your buzz, your my suicide drug