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Introspection Dark Poems | Introspection Poems About Dark

These Introspection Dark poems are examples of Introspection poems about Dark. These are the best examples of Introspection Dark poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Pantoum | |

Wayward Child

Ah, memory is a fickle lover succumbing to the tide
grasping for the grains of sentiment sometimes left.
In cold or torrid waves, spent passions now abide
for you have left me, long ago, I'm now, alone bereft.

Grasping for the grains of sentiment sometimes left:
beside a roaring bonfire, where sparks on night winds glide;
for you have left me, long ago, I'm now alone, bereft.
I huddle in a dune's dark shade with nothing left inside.

Beside a roaring bonfire, where sparks on night winds glide,
we conceive a wayward child, a changeling child, a thief. 
I huddle in a dune's dark shade with nothing left inside,
as the waves of age and ages, return only grief.

We conceive a wayward child, a changeling child, a thief. 
In cold or torrid waves, spent passion now abides,
as the waves of age and ages, return only grief,
ah, memory is a fickle lover succumbing to the tide.

Details | Free verse | |

Truth, Tears and Temptation

Venus’s light grew ever brighter as discovery marked its territory
On new faces—old ones brought to the light of sudden love-falls
I grew wary of the feelings surpassing my entire being
Wavelengths of caution holding their hands up in dominance
“Do not pass as to succumb to the charm of your desires,
Yet pause in the epiphanies that blind you”

This voice had the authority over the stars and planets,
Over the birds and beasts, and could be heard by all rebellious men
Its anger was subtly piercing, with no trace of mortal malice
Erupting for the greater good of my confused soul,
Trapped in the sentiments that have swayed me into some false conviction

“Stay here and forget the voice,” says another oh so softly,
“Take wing into heavens none have traveled before
Do not pause at the discretion of your reasoning—
Instead ride upon the back of revolution’s stride
Taste the inner cravings that have molded you together
Crunch on the sustenance of those around you
Eat it all—for the morsels are both tasty and satisfying
Be fattened in the comfort that everyone around you…FALLS”…

And then my guard was cut clean off…
By the most gorgeous face I have ever set eyes upon
I had seen this face, many a time…
Yet now it pierced me sharper than ever before
I longed to taste the lips that spoke to me
I faltered in the sound of the laughter escaping the mouth
The heart of this being was so fixated in its own reality
And the despair of my desire grew uncomfortably under boulders of Never-

Oh voice, loud as thunderous fire…
Why can I not desire what I will never have? 
Will I crumble to dust by this new feeling,
Or shall I forget it all and assemble my thoughts upon new and greater 

“Oh beautiful soul, take a look at your heart of gold,
Remember your time is ever so short—and though all fall short,
These desires inside you will stretch your time into success
All bottled up in alerted misery,
Why burden yourself in cold sobriety?
Embark upon the passions like the waves of the sea—
Give that heart that you so long for what it deserves…
Give it the truth—your truth
And if you fall, you fall…”

I silenced the thought with terrible thrashing tears
Wanting to listen, yet too stiff to absorb it all
I begged the voice to strengthen me,
And all I could hear was the assurance of my desires

Yet the echo of the Almighty was clearer than the sorrows I possess even 

“Do not pass as to succumb to the charm of your desires,
Yet pause in the epiphanies that blind you”

Details | Free verse | |

The missing me

With shadows in the dark,
Facing atrocities of the cold,
Yet drenched in the sweat,
I walk down the street

Am bound to follow what others passed by,
Crime it is as if else I try,
Tears follow the path of my cheek,
And it’s the only way my eyes speak,
Lips of mine when turn dry.

I smile I really try to,
To be happy as if I was made to,
I speak of something I don’t know
But there’s what my heart knows,
That’s what my eyes ponder,
And that’s what untold but true,
Yes I know,
Yes I do,
I am missing me in me,
Yes I know,
Yes I do,
I am missing being me……….

Details | Free verse | |

I know (Oppression)

One thing that I know all about, without any doubt
        The meaning of “Oppression of The Soul.”
               I once shattered all my dreams, with ill-gotten schemes
                      Along with every single goal
Emptiness is a real dark thing
        As it eats its way through your soul
              I found the bottom of the pit, all I can say of it
                       It truly was a very empty hole
I guess every story has a meaning
         Just as every game has a price
              If you look closely at me, you’ll be able to see
                      A lifetime of pain in my advice
Oppression is a real dark word
        Regardless of how the word is used
                 If you’re in the shadow of it, the bottom the pit
                          You know what it means to be abused
For years I walked in the shadows
      I had nothing but hatred for the Son
                I just couldn’t see, why it had to be
                        All the things in my life that had been done
If you were to look into my eyes
      And read all the stories they have to tell
            All you would be able to see, is pain and misery
                   A shadow that was in a living hell
I know all about oppression
     For it rolls upon the shores of hate
        I once looked in the mirror to see, a ghost living in me
             Just a skeleton walking through his fate
I also know all about redemption
     Behind every shadow there rest some form of light
                   With in the breath of a prayer, I learned how to care
                           Thus changing the course of my plight
Every story has a meaning
        There is a way to right any wrong
                Grasp to the light, and then hold on tight
                          As you search for the meaning of your song
My song once was heavy metal
         I truly loved to bang my head
                 An empty soul, with a bottomless hole
                          A never-ending hunger to be fed
Now my song is a ballad
        A story that is full of hope and love
                I learned how to pray, and give it away
                       Accepting grace from the Lord above
Oppression crosses our paths everyday
        It is everywhere to see
                You know what’s right, learn to stand and fight
                       You will have learned to be all that you can be

Written for the "Oppression of the Soul Contest)

Details | Free verse | |


Black feathers always absorb
the most sunshine -
a perfect fusion
of dark and light.

Ebony eyes glitter high
in the calm, cold sky.

A quick dip downwards,
until wing-tips
tenderly kiss
the nearly invisible
tree-tops piercing
the thick winter fog.

Currents suddenly catch hard
as birds of steel
thunder by overhead,
breaking the ancient focus,
with loud, powerful roars.

-Regain thought-

in a flight
of pure contentment.

Black feathers always absorb
the most sunshine -
a perfect fusion
of dark and light.

Details | Free verse | |

It Can't Be Real

A truth in rage of insult furrows my mind
For it is only an offense given to me by myself
In the mouths of others far innocent than I
I feel the tears trickle down my cheeks
For I have surfaced into an ugly mistake
I am always inadequate in this brain
I try to shine like the advice of grace given
But confidence rarely rears its head my way
There’s a sort of shade blocking its way
A shade that darkens everyday

That very shade led me to believe my feelings are wrong
That I will never belong so long as they are not controlled
I must be careful—for the lines of love and lust run cold
I hate myself truly this night
And no one but myself will give me the right
The very right to degrade my every being
Because you are not seeing what I am seeing

There is no point
My lines run cold
Can I be so bold as to say
I still love with a pang of indistinguishable doubt 
All feelings enter in
As my truth blurs and checks out

Your words pierce me so deep
I cannot describe the pain I feel
God it hurts so bad
It can’t be real

Much like the love I have come to embrace
The very love that links to your face
Tears don’t give it justice

It can’t be real
Much like the love I will never face

Details | Narrative | |


They listened to your clever lines,
Felt guilty when you gave them blame
Bought in to your stick man stories
The anecdotal evidence you proclaimed

So now adoption is the enemy
Christian families are a villain 
Gotcha day is doom's day
A horror story of joy killing

They believed you, "He was trafficked!"
But if that was true then what went wrong
The dollars would have moved me out of there
If these books were credible I'd have been gone

Of course you knew the true reality
Your agenda was so thinly veiled 
There isn't this army of rescuers
For years adoption numbers have fell

I'm not copy for your editors
Don't care about best selling lists
I wasn't a child for any Catcher's
Those kinds of children rarely exist

You'd think there was an evil industry
By the awful things you wrote
You created your desired fiction
The fact is agencies are going broke

So don't imprison me with narrow labels
I'm just a hurting human being
I'm not a product or a talking point
I'm a somebody, not a something!

No one shopped for me like it was Walmart
I'm a fatherless child, now an aged out orphan
I have a name, hopes, and fears
You sold me out and made a fortune! 


Sponsor: Chris D. Aechtner
Contest Name: Anything Goes

Details | Verse | |

A Tortured Spirit

A tortured spirit, earth bound wreaths in agony,
trapped within human body, desperate for freedom.
To be able to escape and hide from other's sight,
to escape the whispers that cut like knives.

Always chained, seeing nothing from balanced point of view.
Reading friendly gestures as threats, wanting love and yet,
unable to give back due to fear and lack of trust.
Forever tied by the silken threads of bi-polar.

Looking always with suspicion on friendly gestures
searching them for hidden agenda or betrayals.
Often over loving, smothering the participant
only to suddenly withdraw and push them away.

Talking to one's self often just privately ranting
blaming all but one's self caught up in madness.
Few things seem to relieve this sense of persecution
and so this tortured soul fights on forever trapped.

Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Where The Grass Is Turning Brown In Spots I Buried My Memories

List of things to do before

I fall in love again
I allow my mind to take me
Into the
A wild opened fields
where the grass is turning brown in spots
There’s one
 Wild flower
Dozens of
Scattered pebbles,
Under my feet
Taunted memories,
Bare trees with bend trunks
A cool breeze washes my face
No more umbrella tree
To relief me from
Ray of the sun
I squint from the sun in my eyes
Think of the ghost in my past
Or to deal with the
Ray of the sun
Lists of things to do before
I fall I love again
Buried the pain
Low the drawbridge
Keep the enemy out
I want to be happier 
Than I‘ve ever been
Fall in love again
I buried
 Painful memories
Under the bare umbrella trees

Details | Free verse | |

Submerged Cathedral

Sickle moon gray above the waves
The quiet directionless wind 
On the earth, and in the sky above 
A veil is drawn, cutting into dark spots 
Slowly round and round,  
Murals are etched into the sand  
The statue waits with eyes unblinking 
Silent wonder, solitary armless stone 
Twisted, counter-pose, forever fixed, 
Wonder, what does she see under water? 
Rusty bows and sterns, shipwrecks, 
Silvery fish fluttering in and out of hulls, a 
graveyard outside hallowed ground 

Archway, the great doors dark and closed
Murky, wet light pours in vaulted windows
Through water-worn edges of stained glass 
Seaweed tendrils curl around an altar 
Once, quiet processions marched up the aisle 
They are now only filtered ghosts, 
Murmuring, wavy impressions of what was 
Forever, the tide calls upon the great steeple 
And the lonely under-toe, 
Pulls a mote in the sand around her, 
To protect the bastion in the sea, 
Dark, lovely, lost forever to those above 

Details | Rhyme | |


Digging in my heels I’m ready to run, onward I go with my back to the rising sun
Shadow demons be gone pester me not, I’ll run so fast that you’ll soon be forgot
Newly reborn with no sign of a savior, renouncing the old ways desolate behavior
Forged in fathoms of what could have been, not knowing how not knowing when
My legs tighten I take off in the sand, in search of tomorrow in search of new land
Burning back from the sweltering heat, blisters echo my pain in my pounding feet
Relentless I run from my shoes I break free, running as fast as I can to my destiny
Dried out earth slowly turns green, desert skies of red turn a blue and white serene
Grass under foot a new way is found, no longer am I tethered no longer am I bound
Freedom calls to me bellowing from within, where will it end where should it begin
Breaking the summit confident I leap, my dreams my desires these things I will keep
Diving down toward the crystal river, no more regret no more fear not even a sliver
Splashing down into the waters cleanse, my conviction is what my success depends
Swimming to the shore naked to the sun, it’s my time to rebuild my time has begun

Details | Blank verse | |


In my heart there’s no longer 
loneliness from longing for love.
Finally found someone to love, 
but he is my silent sorrow manifest.

In my chest there’s still even now 
a prolonging lonesomeness.
Finally found somewhere to live, 
but it is my isolating incubation erect.

In my head there’s still me, myself, 
and I comforting my lonely heart.
Finally found someway to befriend, 
but they are my persona’s karma manifest.

In my soul there’s no longer 
loneliness from longing for love.
Finally found some truth of whom I am, 
but my heart’s still filled with loneliness.

Details | Lyric | |

The Downward Spiral (with a nod to NIN)

She sees herself suddenly as a small girl
bare feet on the cold black and white tile
little toes curled
sees the white porcelain tub and
how pretty the light blue water was
so deep it almost came to her chin
as she climbed in

For hours she'd play with her dime store sailboat
loving it though it would hardly float
always taking on water
listing, never level
her wet skinny back hunched over
shoulder blades like primordial wings
every few minutes she'd have to shake the thing

Trying desperately not to break the spell
of pretend
and when
it was time to let the water out
she'd always stay to watch the water drain
weighing the emotional pain
both fascinated and horrified,
as the suction intensified,
by the force of the water
the unstoppable slaughter
waiting for the inevitable rotation
to begin
the dizzying spin

Slowly at first growing faster and faster
a miniature cyclonic water disaster

The dime store boat of course on its side
circling faster in the relentless tide

Then the drain would give a horrible belch
much satisfied with itself.

As she grew the tub got smaller
with shallower water
less and less room
for pretend to bloom.

Years later, dime store sailboat long forgotten,
life having been mostly rotten
working with the most cynical of cynics
ER nurses bitter that it's more like a clinic
runny noses and coughs that folks thought were urgent
working hard to save those who were truly emergent

Hearing from them the phrase: "circling the drain"
memories suddenly flooding the brain
almost able to feel herself as that young girl
watching the sailboat beginning to swirl

Feeling the blood drain, face going pale
she sees vividly the boat with its bright red sail
yellow hull and blue plastic deck
fine hairs rising on the back of her neck

She realizes now the fatigue of age
is from fighting the pull with defiant rage

The closer you get, the faster you spin
and soon the dark whirlpool draws you in

With a knowledge that seems to be purely primal
she now understands the downward spiral

And she knows that she will not put up a fight
she'd rather go silently in the dark of the night

And the dime store boat comes to rest on its side
so it's all come full circle at the end of the ride.

©Danielle White

Details | Lyric | |


Let the Deicide commence.

You're a voyeur at best!
Your vampiric heart is beating out of your chest!
And you have slayed the ones whom would love you for anything less
Ready to consume the final fragments of innocence,
And for you there is no forgiveness,
On your knees pleading, screaming to a tyrant in the skies;
The father of lies.

I will never be enslaved in your superiority
The people agree: jaded of your false dichotomies.
Know: I will be whomever nature intends to be
Apollo and I will share our dreams,
and you will be forced to see
your failure!

I know who you are...
Readily the first to present your scars
Chained by some despot or mental czar
An emotional homunculus in your mind, behind bars
Reluctant to escape - even when proven fake
Your demented mind - depths no one will penetrate!
...And you see me suffering
Not caring of any casualties
Just as long you recieve your safeguard of sympathy
So very wary of the masses and their Anarchy; Liberious ways

Solipsist - Is there no one you can see?
Even if she was presented burning?
Solipsist - Is there no one you can believe?
Even if Sophia was screaming?
Solipsist - Know you have killed and abused me
Imprisoned in your own  personal reality 

Details | Acrostic | |

Reflections: Midlife Crisis

P     aranoia permeates, etching itself into your fractured face,
A     cacophony of constant pressure; life remains a stressful race,
N     othing to hope for, no positives like promotion in the workplace,
I      nability to love, relationships lift anchor and set sail without chase,
C     hildren crushing dreams under mortgages; age grows with disgrace

Details | Blank verse | |

The Eye

The eye,a sign the 
unwise can't comprehend
  Forged from the world's 
illumination in darkened 
minds,for the 
enlightened ones like 
Leonardo da Vinci,Isaac 
Newton,John Milton....etc.
   The eye is a tree 
with many branches like 
Priory of Scion,Knight 
Lodge,Music industry, 
Politics,global economy, 
stretching beyond 
human imaginations-felt 
in all corners of earth.
  The world is clothed 
through wisdom from 
   The eye,all seeing 
sign,an invincible 
emblem of power and 
riches to the lion hearted 
and loyal souls.
A seat of influence and 
  Creating the social order 
through men of power....
  Some see it as a 
curse,others a blessing.
  I feel it,the great eye is 
everywhere watching 

Details | Dramatic monologue | |

A Dark Fairy-tale

A Dark Fairytale

As I was chained, I breathe in.
As I was burned, I breathe out.
As I was cut, I looked down.
As I was broken, I looked up.
As I was destroyed, I closed away.
I had killed myself damaging beyond any repair.
To keep myself closed I chain, cut, burned, and destroyed what was within me, isolation my fear around me. But suddenly as I had nearly been kindled to a shivering light, something braver and stronger then I appeared and took me and held me and once again I was fixed and this is what happened; 
Suddenly I breathed in as I was unchained.
Suddenly I breathed out as my burns disappeared.
Suddenly I looked up as my broken body mended.
Suddenly I looked down as my cuts faded.
Suddenly I was opened up and my destruction was nothing more then a dream
As my knight, you entered that shadow and held me now I grow with a unprofaned radiance.
I was held once more, and my soul emerged.
I was spoken to once more, and my mind went blank.
I was kissed and my body reacted without a second hesitation.
And before I could run away once more, I was trapped.
Unlike my prison I lived in a fairytale, in were I don’t want to live this place anytime soon. What happened then and what happening now are so fair apart it hilarious.
 I’ve forgiven the past, not forgotten it. Prove never to make the same mistakes or else be locked back inside that tower I call my mind. 
Let me in brave knight, into your mysterious ways.
Let me in brave knight let me have secret passages into that world of yours. 
Let me in brave knight so I can truly capture you. 
I was as cold as ice even more then winters hail, but you with a ridged past that icier then I could have imagined is as warm as the summer sun and sweet like spring air.
For saving me, for taking my heart, for releasing me, I’ll become everything you want and then more, I’ll stand by your side and hold you like you held me and I shall be everything you need.
My sweet Knight.

Details | Villanelle | |

Soul of the night

Have I looked upon the darkest hour 
Cluelessly cleansing, experience dire 
Renewed regret, taste of the flower

Cunning clever concoctions, now sour 
Triggering a transformation by fire
Have I looked upon the darkest hour

With witty wings I flew, now I cower 
Restless reasoning, ready to inquire
Renewed regret, taste of the flower

Tantalizing temptation takes power 
Honestly only one thing that I desire 
Have I looked upon my darkest hour

Written rhythm and rhyme I scour 
Savvy sayings of saints, I don't tire 
Renewed regret, taste of the flower

A blundering bluntness as I devour 
Wicked witchcraft have I called sire 
Have I looked upon the darkest hour
Renewed regret, taste of the flower

Penned 2/5/2013 by Wayland Bunch II

did this on phone so harder to see errors, which after checking barely today 2/13/13 were a lot lol, thanks guys for not mentioning them lol.

Details | Lyric | |

Lacerated Wings

They are bound to the Earth like trees
Suffocating under the weight of an icy grave 
Reaching to be free, but only their limbs are seen
Hoping that one day someone will see:
They can't escape with lacerated wings

The ocean surrounds me, covering everything
Nothing will be clearly seen; confusion overwhelming
No-one can save you, you're on your own, left to die
Manipulating every bleeding heart you can find
I can't escape with lacerated wings.

Swarms of nets, waves of screams 
Entangle: your captive illusions and dreams
The mask has be seared - The truth now they see
The Liar - Vampiric Fiend; lowly thief
And now they know you can't escape with Lacerated Wings

There's reasons for your rejections:
Your Heavy heart's transferred oppression
The scars are too deep to pass the trials
But you can find peace in your cage of empty spirals
You Cannot Escape With Lacerated Wings

Details | Ode | |

Nyx - Ode


The shadows know the scent of cloves,
as Nyx devolves from sleep's crossroad,
the night-owls croak to domes above,
her ode the stars turns to abode.

Her firmness strings the scene's stillness,
her laughter waves in hung ether,
small hours' submit her thoughts' steepness,
advancing 'mid green heather.

The night birds watch - with eyes of amber
night wraiths descend from stardome flare,
upon a sky-drome meander
that ghostly travelers time-share.


Brilliant's the moon in ventured glory,
above shapes lays and daunting wraiths,
her eminence surpassed souls' faith,
to hark the travelers' lone story.

And kind advanced to lands of blooms,
as night conveyed upon each breath,
she confers grand the kiss of death,
with fates to weave on lethal looms.


On darkened growth she shines dismal,
In Stygian reign she rules - abysmal,
enchanted souls shall dwell in void,
with Acheron's old paths destroyed.
© G.V. 10-03-2012, All Rights Reserved
Nyx = Night

Details | Light Poetry | |

Half Alive

I woke up inside a whiskey bottle 
Not sure if I drowned in booze or lost hopes
In the dawn I rose from the darkness of hell
Another chance, another dead end

The devil tempts me with my sins
Tells me always I can win
If only I fall back into the arms
Of the mistress of past sins

I stared
Into the mirror of hope
What I saw
Was hopeless

So I fell back asunder in a bottle
Not sure if I drowned in sorrow
Woke up on a road to nowhere
Walked back to half a life

My smiles are all the wrapping
For a package of withered sorrows
Scared by cruel winds over the passing of years
Torn right through the heart

One more time
I walk into the past
Hoping to see some sign
Could my path be other than divined?

The eyes in the dark seek me out
They see the cold inside my heart
Half lies live within
The haunted house of my soul

Details | I do not know? | |

I Don't Care

I Don't Care...

I don't care,
if you're battered black and blue,

I don't care,
just as long as I can drink and screw.

I don't care,
if you've lost your damn job,

I don't care,
you're just a kernel off the cob.

I don't care,
when I see you begging in the street,

I don't care,
I get to suckle on capitalism's raw teat.

I don't care,
about the elderly, the poor, or the weak,

I don't care,
if the earth will be inherited by the meek.

I don't care,
if the climate is warming, I'm so much cooler,

I don't care,
in my penthouse I'm the boss, the only ruler.

I don't care,
for those rolling for scraps in the muck,

I don't care,

I really don't care, cos' I don't give a f**k

inspired by Bob Geldof's "The Great Song of Indifference"

Details | Free verse | |

The Storm

And the storm calls to me in ways you'll never understand
A gentle call that urges my soul forth
The lighting guiding a path for my feet to walk
Between the stones and ash of all that once was
I stand in the echoing silence of the rain 
It drops down upon my skin like the blessing waters of heaven
Soothing me, lifting the weight from my body 
I feel at once as if I am home
Standing amid two dimensions 
Caught between two skies - here and there
The night wraping around me in warmth
The gentle wind lifting me off my feet
Drops from the clouded moon washing away my body
and I am left just a soul, an essence 
The storm calls me forth from beneath my roof
Beckoning me into its depth 
I stand among the reeds in the basin 
They dance and sway as if welcoming me
And I sway with them back 
Caught up in the power that charges the air
That threatens to sweep me away 
If the ground will just loosen its hold
The thunder rumbles a low welcoming growl
And I get pleasently lost within it
I am so small compared to its vastness
I close my eyes and succumb to the skies wishes
Rising higher until my feet no longer touch the ground 
My fingertips touch the liquid color of the stars
A sigh drifts from my lips
There is no need of thought to stay afloat
There is no demand to breathe in air
No crushing weight upon my chest
As my lungs struggle to survive
There are no struggles here
I make my bed on blackened clouds
And give in to the call
The storm has claimed me as its own 
It was such a struggle to stay upon the ground
When the storm would call me home

Details | Sonnet | |

Last Breath

You were a shining Star.
Few of many in the sky.
Looking up so very high,
Not knowing why you are.

Close and set you are far.
Spinning flames  knot a tie,
I note a pattern just like pi.
Colliding with me you spar.

So burn it up and burn away,
Sow your heart upon a plane.
Chart your distance in the clay.
Burn it all up then call it sane.

The explosion in the sky is His death.
All burned up He has no last breath.

(R) Registered:  2013  Ann Rich

Details | Bio | |

Solitude: To Yoda, An Ode

Green bark a prism creates,
Feel the pull of earth, you must.

Rotates, a slime of endless hates,
Can hold me not, this world’s crust.

Friendship’s ties, isolation Deflates,
Succumbs, my spaceship, to bitter rust.

Mist, my soul forever permeates,
Lift-off, booms the rocket’s thrust.

My spirit when light returns, elates,
Swamps swell, swallowed hope’s swirling dust.

Trapped, I am, until student from fate
Arrives to learn; Cloud City or bust.

Details | Rhyme | |

The Real Me

I want to show you the real me,
Not just what you think you see,
I like to dress in black, not pink,
My dark poems will make you think,
I can't always be happy like you,
For I am sad, and often blue,
My soul was dying to break free,
To be the person I wanted to be,
I have hid my true self for many years,
While deep inside, crying many tears,
But, now I am showing the real me,
And you are just starting to see,
I'm emerging in the dark poetry I write,
The difference is like day and night.

Details | Free verse | |

Twisted Fate

A pocket of money he doesn’t have
A bucket of tender and love he can’t buy
Of simple moves he complains
Of simple actions he shouts
If he was my man 
I would have never forgiven him
I would have never lasted 
But he isn’t and I’m not that great 
But I’m still mad and annoyed and broken 
Of what he does
Of the craziness that has got into him 
And I pray to God
Day by day 
That all to be resolved
All that love to be returned
I can’t fool myself
What has gone is to never be replaced
What has lost its spark has gone to waste
But hope is killing us to survive
Begging us to stay 
And we listen, we obey 
But hope becomes old
And time is thrown to waste
Love and pleasure, respect 
Is never to be again in place
Why ?
I ask myself this question everyday 
But it seems it has none but one answer
Compulsion to lose love
Compulsion to bury respect
Compulsion to fight and never be the same
Compulsion to forsake loyalty 
Why ? 
Because dark is stronger than light
Even if light tries to persuade dark 
Dark is too stubborn 
It will never obey…

Details | Free verse | |

La Peinture noire

translation below

Le noir, la nuit,rêves vides
Tu n’a jamais vu la noirceur comme moi
Le matin, tu te réveilles inlassablement
Le soleil, la pluie, un autre jour
Vous existez, moi, je rêve d'exister
Je dois faire naitre mon existence
Pour l'instant
Le noir est tout à fait l`obscurité
La nuit, le jour, les rêves
Tout, tout noir
Je prends mon pinceau,
En même temps je regarde ma peinture
Chaque jour, heure après heure
J’essaie de faire la peinture la plus magnifique
J’imagine mon tableau, explosant de pastels
A la fin
Je pleure
Quand je regarde mon chef d’œuvre
Tout simplement
Une peinture noire


The Black Painting

The black, the night, empty dreams
You have never seen the blackness as I
The morning, you awake to whatever
The sun, the rain, another day
You exist, I dream to exist
I give birth to my existence
For the moment
The black is always the darkness
The night, the day, the dreams
All, all is black
I take my paint brush
At the same time I look at my painting
All day, hour by hour
I try to make a most magnificant painting
I imagine the painting, exploding in pastels
In the end
I cry
It is simply
A black painting

Details | Free verse | |

Giving In To The Gray

Overwhelmed with fear I whispered into the rain
Disarming defenses, Giving in to the gray 
Tearing down all of my shelter within my hollowed decay
While this echoing silence gave every tear drop a name
They begin filling the voids with mundane hopes for a change
Heaven will save me from this hell and blue skies will reign
Lazily lay in green grass watching clouds drift away
It's all but a deflated dream now that the colors have changed
My thoughts have become restless noise of uncertainties rearranged
Damning all of my emotions, lies decorated with grace
Now I stand with a hardened heart in the sobering autumn rain 
I'm disarmed and defenseless, Giving in to the gray

Details | Dramatic monologue | |


They say you'll never really know
What prison is like until you've actually been there
When your mind betrays like Judas every
Logical thought that runs through your head

When solitary confinement becomes voluntary
When the only thing you truly seek out of life is
To be free from regret which can weigh you down
More than ball and chain

When it doesn't really matter
How sorry you are for mistakes
You may have made in the past
Because redemption is nowhere in sight

When eagerly you wait for loved ones to arrive
But no one pays you a visit

When surrounded by crowds of people
Who claim  to be trustworthy, but can't wait for you
To turn your back so that they can F--- you up the A--
When thoughts of death
Sing like song, your favorite lullaby
You know you've been there
In more ways than one

Details | Verse | |

Right Now

In the exact moment that I am right now
I stand in a sea of vulnerability;
susceptible to the effects of causes around me
and since I am fully aware, 
I own my surroundings
I am one with sounds and vibrations
resonating from the earth;
I am that pulse of the drum beat 
thats been thrashing 
inside me since birth

Right now, I am exactly as I am
deeply flawed and misjudged
used, victimized and persecuted
Right now I am you in the absolute

Right now, I am exactly as I am
balanced, whole and complete
attracting abundance and certainty  
Right now I am peace - still you
Right now, I am exactly as I am

Details | Lyric | |

To young to die

Too young to die

They take a boy, too young to shave
Who has never lived his life
While his mates are chasing girls
They fill his life with strife
They send him off to a brand new war
Over some damned fools Ideal
I don’t understand their wars
And I guess I never will

The folk who like to run the show
Or most of them at least
Have never even been to war
They’ve never felt the beast
As he rips right into one’ intestines
That hollow hole of fear!
Each leader should be sent to war
Then the picture might grow clear

Then when they send young boys to war
They’ll see the whole damned show
The weight of endless terror
 And then maybe they’ll know
What it’s like as a fine young man
To be sent out there to die
He might then know, how a mother feels
When she’s lost her little guy.

1 August 2013 @ 1443hrs.

Details | I do not know? | |


when you're fast asleep
and thoughts creep into your head
and flood your brain until it weeps
and your mind descends dark and deep
into a land of dead end worlds
where the only way out
is the way you came in
but the road is way too steep
and your feet are made of lead
and every smile is just pretend
and nothing is to be believed
and you're going off the deep end
bleeding rivers of hatred
into a pool of shallow deceit
where every thought is colored red
and every shade of black completes
every nightmare ever conceived
born of blood-stained dreams within dreams
where that person you used to be
is falling into skies of silent screams
and contemplating death
all the while wishing
to be alive again

Details | Ballade | |

She worries so much

She worry’s so much

She worries in case he’ll leave her
In her crazy kind of mind
Old memories they haunt her
And now they’ve made her blind
She does not see reality
She’s living in a dream
She’s built herself a nightmare
It’s just the way it seems.

She doesn’t see him laughing
And singing all the time
And how he is so loveable
And writes her lovely rhymes
How he cares so much when she is down
She never see those things
She sees the horror in her mind
That her thoughts so often bring.

When will she ever see him?
The way he really is
He’s wrote five thousand poems for her
All filled with loves sweet bliss
But is it not too late for her
When she lives back in the past
The damage done by foolish acts
It be so very vast

23 July 2013 @ 1250hrs

Details | Free verse | |

The Light

They praise me like a saint,
But I am a sinner;
They don't know the man they see.
I am an addict.
Broken eyes to pornography,
Only Jesus can set me free.
Only by His death on the cross
And the grace of His Father's love
Am I able to be set free.
With God as The Light,
The One and Only Light,
The Only Hope in sight,
Will I be set free.
I am free.

Details | Couplet | |

Going To War

The phrase, "going to war", has always had ominous and forbidding qualities that can 
reverberate to the very core of the soul. Experiencing such an ordeal has its own legacy. It 
differs from person to person in varying degrees and the anticipation is usually far more 
negative than the actual arrival into the area of conflict. Though each war has its own 
realities with which to deal, it is not the war addressed by, "Going to War". The poem reveals 
the war within when the psyche literally battles with the 'unknown' in its struggle to accept 
the actuality of an event feared and imagined.

The eastern sky grew dark with night, The west held light of day. A lonesome plane in westward flight Was taking us away. When orders came for Viet Nam And all the names were read, They may as well have dropped a bomb, Or shot us there instead. Some few had been to fight before But most of us had not; Had never dealt with death or war, Or fears of being shot. Our words came scarce and laughter naught, Concern was quick to grow. The doubts and fears we all had brought Seemed primed and set to blow. A wave of silence dashed our youth Against the rocks of war, And in its wake, the naked truth; We're little boys no more. The time had come to set aside The games of yesterday, To give our step a longer stride, To learn another way. Now doubt looms dark and ominous, A vulture from the blue, That preys upon what peace remains, From all the things we knew. We pray to soothe our fears and dread, For rest to ease our mind, For guidance through the war ahead, And mourn the 'world', behind; And that one day we'll understand Why people have to die... Still, time grows near when we would land, The miles were flying by. The windows fog with quickened breath In our descent to land. We all are sure a brush with death Is very close at hand. We watch Siagon come into view And wait to feel a blast; Then hold our breath, as if on cue, When wheels touch down, at last. The war, for us, has just begun; Our fates seem so unsure, But we are warriors, every one, Resolved we will endure. ©1971 by Jim Fish

Details | Rhyme | |

The Last Crooked Mile

Saw the prints so there I track
Standing here on the edge of the crack
An alarming abyss and no turning back

Peeking around in deep dark places
There to find small little traces
Of successes in life and all the disgraces

There laid before me in my hand
Not even a mere speck of sand
Among the scheme of things so grand

Soaring so high up and away
Clearer there the light of day
Watching in wonder the superlative display

Climbing up on wings to take a ride
Naked and leaving behind all aside
With no reason at all or desire to hide

No words invented could ever convey
The visions there that come my way
As I sit and ponder my thoughts today

Some are good and some are bad
Then of those that make me sad
And of course so very happy and glad

If wanting to sing while walking along
Don't track in the dark places for much too long
And never try to create your own words to the song

Bad things can happen along the while
But upon my face I want to wear a smile
As I travel along that last crooked mile

Details | Sestina | |

Idella's Gift

There are smells and sights and tastes which always remind 
of Grandma with her rows of flowers bright,
the red of poppy the gladiolas white, the blue of spring violets vain 
the scent of lilacs in the air and pine needles in the mix.   
Sometimes too, the memory of her sweet breath does rise 
of Black Jack gum or peppermint and all those summer times.

The search for new spout dandelions the mushrooms other times
And summer’s end brought black blue teeth a blueberry’s remind.
We’d dig for bait with cans of tin, Idella, grandma mine, and rise
from ‘neath the patched quilts of calico so bright.
By chance to fish within the stream, trout in our breakfast mix
along with silly shaped pancakes so placed on china vain.

The beauty of her sky blues eyes never was so vain
that wisps of salt and pepper hair gave time
its only claim. To rise like yeast a child within this mix
to hear a bark of terrier and feel Babe’s tongue remind
of childhood days a Grandma’s house. Idella our bright
find. Take those blessed tender hands and rise

Touch childhood cheek like dough of white and rise
have no dark dwelling thoughts of blue blood in the vein
the thinness of her fragile skin the dimmed light so bright
just remember love full of the better times.
And with the scent of venison and sizzling pans remind
laced with home made butter, fried onions in the mix.

How had Idella’s loveliness from German bloodlines mixed
together with the stalwart Grandpa Trussell’s rise
to birth the lively bunch of child my Mom’s remind?
When in the dark of night the rush of red rolls through my vein
mind light flies and flickers like the candle flame of time
and I return on winged horse within a dream so bright.

Smell the wood smoke from the stove caste iron bright.
See the siblings teasing cat and dog within the mix.
The mantle clock’s brass pendulum sings in time.
Hear the winter wind blow through the rafter’s rise
like tucked in chicks the storms blew all in vain,
now only grand kids live these tales and do remind.

Always in the darkest times I think of my Idella bright
and Gram reminds me of both joy and sorrow’s mix
soon like the wind on weathervane I'll rise to heaven and her kiss.

Details | Rhyme | |

Living Without

I tried to write about love but I haven’t felt it. 
I tried to write about the sea but I’ve never seen it. 
Then I tried to write about the air, but I have never breathed it. 
I tried to write about magic but I never believed it.
I couldn’t write about god, all I have ever done is sinned.
And when I tried to write about life I found, 
I have never really lived.

Details | Tanka | |

System Overload

Darkness consumes me
Corrupted thoughts take over
Soul becomes hollow
Self castigation occurs
Tears of blood destroys all hope

Details | Narrative | |

Wackadoodles Versus Wackjobs

Wackadoodles are crazy silly.
Wackjobs are crazy serious.
Comedians are Wackadoodles.
Actors are Wackjobs.
Comedians know they are clowns.
Actors think they are doing something
for a living so very important that people
need to hear their thoughts and opinions
on politics, poverty, war and peace.
Note to the Hollywood crowd,
you are play actors, emphasis on play.
No one with even a half of a brain
takes anything you say seriously.
The dogs Rin Tin Tin and Lassie were actors.
Monkeys, chimpanzees and gorillas over the years
have been actors in the movies and on television.
So shut the heck up and play your little characters.
If anyone really wants to know what is on your minds,
they can go to a zoo and ask a hairy ape or funky monkey.

Details | Sonnet | |

Beautiful Lies

December 18, 2012

Beautiful lies known as little white lies
yet one is no more deceptive than each
The truth is what makes it afraid of light
It's important we practice what we preach

Imagination built on lies destroy
Imagination built on truth create
Conquering evil we try to avoid
Tooth fairy, Halloween, Santa abate

Perceptions and images make it real
Origins of Pagan rituals true
We've wandered down this path for a bum deal
Now more lies are created all brand new

The mask behind a beautiful white lie
is the truth with a constant shield, but why?

Details | Rhyme | |

We're Just Sinful Human Beings

We’re Just Sinful Human Beings! All of us are just sinful human beings! Scripture says; “the heart is sinful above everything!” Even if we try to hide and wash our sins away… Wickedness in our heart, is there, each day! God made Adam and Eve, with perfection! But sin crept in, like a deep and wicked infection! He put them in the Garden of Eden with a choice. It was up to them to listen to his voice. They had all they could want, with one instruction. Disobeying this, would lead to their destruction. Satan took the form of a snake to tempt their mind. And their disobedience affected all of mankind! Since that time, mankind has needed atonement! Only the blood of Jesus can cleanse you! This very moment! Only his blood can wash away sin’s dark stain! It can only be found when one calls on Jesus’ name! We’ve all sinned and fallen short of God’s glory! But wait! This doesn’t have to be the end of the story! God and all of his angels in heaven, are waiting for YOU! The love and blood of Jesus, can make you BRAND NEW! His love, for our sins, is what he offers in exchange! You can be forgiven! And forever totally changed! This opportunity is for you, to reach out and take! Won’t you do it now? For eternity’s sake??? By Jim Pemberton

Details | Free verse | |

Indian Summer, Part III

The winds of Winter wait,
Whispering to me of the approaching future,
But still far off, biding their time
Until this span of light and warmth has lasted out its stay.

     Meantime, I engage myself in taking stock;
     Compiling the days that define myself to myself
     Enlarging the catalog so far as I can,
     Building up a narrative.

So many memories
Like fireflies in a Summer's night
Flash through the dark spaces of my mind.

Childhood: Flash
                            Youth: Flash
Young Parenthood: Flash
                                         Empty Nest: Flash.

Family, friends, events
Joys, sorrows, beginnings, endings -
All make their flickering passages;
All paint their images onto me  

     The particles dance and shift
     Cells die to be replaced
     The face in the mirror becomes my father's
     Molecule by molecule
     With each passing instant.

     The particles dance and shift
     Moving back towards the dark unknown
     From which they came,
     Yet somehow in the midst of it
     The I that was
                              And am
                                            And shall be
     Remains to watch the long parade unfold.

And that parade, banal and fantastic,
Marches past that inside window where I watch to see myself pass by,
As some newer self shall do the same through all tomorrows
Until the day when all the marching stops for me -

     And then, my fellow marchers,
     O my many, varied Loves,
     On that last Winter's day,
     Where will we be,
     Where will we be?

     What musics shall we hear?
     What wonders might we see?



Details | Lyric | |

Nature's Sigh

The Black butterfly waves away her adorations
All she seeks is seclusion, subsuming slave to mortification
The Dear Air is all she can breath, captive of imaginary dreams
The Beacon resonates, but the hope isolates
The Wasteland's silky fingers caressing the virgin's face

So she is now, the covet of the damned
Programmed to every victim's pain
Carrying the weight of every sorrow
Drowning in wrongs she does not know
But paradise is at loss; she must go

Nature sighs after the bite
All my hopes fading
Don't look at me with those sorrowful eyes
How do you know exactly what I'm feeling?
I'm just the ghost flower passing by
And you can hear nature's sigh

Details | Ballad | |

An Ode to Struggle

All the days go by desperately,
Everyday is a day to be overcome,
I am struggling to get through them,
Just to live another day in agony.

I wish to come out victorious,
Of all the turmoil I have to bear,
Of all the pain that I go through,
Of the loneliness that grips my heart.

Each day passes by me unnoticed,
Each day has become my sworn enemy,
Each day I wish for things to change,
Everyday I pray for a miracle to happen.

I hope to get through this unharmed
Without a scar to remind me of this
This story I wish to end well or let me be
Without any expectations of what will be.

Details | Blank verse | |

Losing Sight

Why was I given these eyes that hide 
Behind this clumsy heart-
Hands and knees forever searching 
For an honest soul?
It feels as though we're wringing water
From a dusty rag.
It feels as though we're submerged in longing 
Ever drowning in our thirst.

Why was I given these eyes that grope
For another’s warmth,
When love is fired through a gun,
Or taken from a calloused hand;
Sight has cursed my heart to see
The naked spent to dust.

Kiss me with your tasteless lips and I will see no more.
I will not see their tears through mine,
I will not see their laughter;
I will not see their careless words,
Looking dumbly after.
I will not see their hateful glares that only’ve seen hateful eyes.
I will not see their broken ears that never hear my broken cries;
They’ll all be black to me.

Jacob Reinhardt							09/11/2013

Details | Free verse | |

I lay sleeping

I lay sleeping with eyes wide open,
I lay sleeping with dreams that have no meaning,
I lay sleeping with nothing to dream about.
I lay sleeping with no care and sleep with eyes blind,
I lay sleeping, there with my eyes wide open.

Seeing the dark change from dark to black.
There is no moon, there is no sky
just purple strokes of paint in the sky.
Take that morning dew smell and close your blind eyes.
Smell the morning, that smell that clicks in your mind.
The smell of childhood dreams,
that as an adult never came true.
Sleeping bare in the nude with your eyes wide open.
Thinking of her, as she is five thousand miles away from you.
Wanting to love and hold her, but no use in crying.
Sleeping their with blind eyes in the dark that dances in the light.

Your lamplight turned down low,
as life trickeles down in its nightgown and yawns for sweet slumber.
Tired from longs days, and sometimes long nights,
wanting to curel in bed and close its blind eyes.
Dusk will soon peek its head through the blinds
and awake life to a new dawn.
She sleeps in the morning, and walks at night.
When he sleeps at night, and walks with a bare nude heart in the morning.

Life climbs over yellow mountains,
and meets her fellow compainion
a handsome fellow with broud shoulders and blessed with an ego
as I sleep there with my eyes wide open.
As I sleep with my eyes blind to what life has intented for me,
and as I raise to walk the lone streets at the break of the dew covered lawn
at the first sweet smells of dawn,
I can see life go on with the handsome man
and I blind and wanting to go to bed.

I dream of dreams that have no meaning
Gardens of cluelessness and raging emotions
tare me down and I am confused on which way to go.
Do I stay here and dream away, blind and half awake
as life slaps me across my broad cheek?
Or shall I walk on with life hand and hand
and regain my vision of the world,
Start to sleep with dreams that make sense
and dreams that are made of gold and have no end?
Dream of fancy dreams that show love and happy endings
I would love that, and I would love to walk with life,
but she is out of my leauge.

And my bed is so cozy and I feel like sleeping.
So I shall sleep on more restless night chashing life down.
I lay sleeping with my eyes wide open.
I lay sleeping with dreams that have no meaning.
I lay sleeping waiting for life to come back from the mountains
and lay beside me.
I lay sleeping with hope of regaining hope and salvage
what is left of my spirit at hand.

Details | Rhyme | |

Get out of my Heart

I lay, dripping, soaked within a dark sweat,
seeing and hearing your soft voice abet.
I want to run, to leave this merciless realm,
but you pull me closer, without a choice at helm.
Get out of my dreams.

I miss you, but I hate you, every last memory.
You taunt my every being, you’re all that I see.
I see you in the crowds, or when I’m all alone.
You’re here and there, on your heartless throne.
Why couldn’t you stay?
Get out of my life.

I hear your laughter and see your beautiful smile.
Once so beautiful, now helping others with guile.
You’re now decayed, withering into shallow dust.
I loved you so much, and never again will I trust.
Get out of my head.

Tears I weep, when others aren’t around to see –
I remember the days, the months and years I bleed.
I try to forget, and to hate you and your choices.
But all I can hear are these damn forgiving voices.
Maybe I am what you proclaim me to be.
Was I really that monster, that demon you see?
I hate what I love and love what I hate.
I try to erase our past, and to claim it our fate.
But I can’t let go, you’re all that I hear and see.
I wished you could have loved, that loathsome “me”.
Get out of my heart.

Details | Free verse | |

Life Can Be Cruel

I cannot get into heaven
God I have tried!
Suicide is a double edge sword
Especially when you survive!
Walking the streets at night
Dazed and confused
Longing to be loved
When is Mum, coming for me?

"Does she still love me?"
"Does she still care?"
"Does she still think of me?"
"Does she wonder, where I am?"

I want her to come find me
I want her to say she 'loves me’
I want her to comfort me
I want her to take me home
And keep me safe
And not forget hat I exist
Like the way she treats me now

I wish God 
Could make my Mum
Magically appear
Making this hellish nightmare
On the street

“Send my Mum please!”
So, all this can end!
Before this last ray of hope
Diminishes for good!

I don’t want to become
The walking dead
Forever forgotten as if 
I was never born!
For this is the cruel, harsh reality
Of living life, feeling unloved
Uncared for, abandoned,
Left to fend for my own

A dangerous killer inside me
Eating away, at my soul
Something, no one can see
As I suffer in silence
My insides crippling!

Lost, alone and frightened
Weeping on a dirty
Graffiti park bench
Dirty tears
Rolling down my cheeks
Stuffing newspapers under my jumper
To keep myself warm

“What am I going to do?”

“Will I make it through the night?”
“Will I get raped and beaten?”
"Will I be left for dead?”
“Will I survive
To see another day?

“Is my life worth living?”

Please God, I beg of you
Have mercy now
Please show me the way!

Details | Narrative | |

Before The Light

There are too many times when my eyes open and it’s still dark.

It’s useless to think that I’ll go back to sleep, and it’s no good at all to lay in bed and watch the passing parade of worries that comes marching down the Main Street of my mind. When I do that, the entertainment seems to take on its own life. The parade grows longer, more spectacular, with the noise of marching bands, my thoughts, growing louder. Clowns scurry ahead of the band leader, throwing red balls in the air. There are too many balls to count.

The best thing I can do for myself is to rise from my bed. But there are days when it seems too much to bear being home before the rest of the world rises. There’s just too much emptiness in my small house. 

I leave, escaping to DD's, where I sit and sip my coffee over a newspaper. Sometimes there are others sitting waiting for the light to come, too–like the woman who gives an animated “Hello” to everyone she meets, staring too long into our eyes. She takes out her cell phone to call a friend about the rashes on her legs. Something is biting her during the night. Raj and the other DD workers snicker, and I am drawn to–but at the same time repelled by–her morbid troubles.

Sometimes, in the winter, it seems as if the time I spend in the dark before the light comes is endless. I don’t think it’s normal for darkness to last so long; it’s probably one of the punishments for eating the apple in Eden.

I much prefer the early light of June and July, when the morning allows the gentle unfolding of life around me. Somehow, when the sun is in the sky at 6:30 a.m., a passing gasoline truck rattling my windows does not sound so lonely. Nor do I mind the sun revealing the stains from spring rains on my windows … or the birds loudly announcing their presence in the trees. Their manic chirping awakens schoolchildren eagerly counting down the days til summer.

When the darkness is especially long, and I have already sought out the comfort of others who cannot sleep, I will sometimes return home and do what I am so reluctant to do — sit still. I take up my position in a special chair near a window that looks out onto the street. I close my eyes and listen to the heated rhythms that only my body can make. My breath … my ins and outs.

But I wonder; why is it so hard to be still? Especially in the dark before the light.

Details | Rhyme | |

The Traveler

I took a journey down a dark road,
And now I’m a traveler, exhausted.
My heart, was unable to carry the load,
And I nearly lost it!

I was a traveler looking for an answer
But all I found was heartache.
I watched as Mother battled cancer
And that was almost too much to take!

I became lost a time or two,
And found an old familiar trail.
I had to escape the memory of you,
For I felt I was living in hell!

My travels took me to some dark places,
And some people thought I would not survive.
I’ve come to read expressions on faces,
So, why be surprised that I’m still alive?!

My journey often made me weary,
But I still continued to roam.
I maintained my spirituality,
And soon traveled back home.

I’ve learned a lot about myself
And  I learned so much of others.
Love is more valuable than wealth
And priceless is a hug from a mother!

Details | Free verse | |


How queer the color of viscera
squarely foreign in my breast
To be the butcher and grim and goddess
All in one
Leaves identity succinct
Or identifies succinctness
If it has been
Then so it was always before

Therein is 'Peace'
Reposed and eyes rolling
Great, vacant saucers on vertiginous axis
She is quite the swollen beast
And on all fronts, she is terrible
If only you'll watch you may notice her growth
A malignant sort
An unwelcome appendage
I'd dash it out but I've already gone
Too pale and dogged in life to succumb
I curse her tenacity

She has a sister, I think
Or maybe a child
A child who lives down deep in my chest
A child who shrieks and tears down the walls
Perhaps she dislikes their pattern

Details | ABC | |

the beast and me

There's fire in my lungs.
smoke flows through my veins.
I feed the beast my soul
to gain euphoric pain.
I serve he who lives in me.
The monster in my mind.
The creature so abusive,
at times can be so kind.
In my mental hell,
I sit beside his throne.
I tend to his desire,
so I don't have to be alone.
Here He is my god.
And I, in turn, am his.
A symbiotic worship,
sealed within a kiss.
Sulfuric fumes consume us,
as we dance into the ether.
The hands of god are ours.
Hes made me a believer.
My halo, so very worn.
His horns, so alluring.
Hand in hand we walk,
love and hate enduring.
His guidance lifts me higher
than any drug could try.
His chains hold me down.
bound wings can not fly.
Walking straight and tall,
crawling on my floor.
I am his moonlit goddess.
And his filthy whore.
I wont break his binds.
I wish not, to be free.
I can never escape him,
for this beast is me.

Details | Lyric | |

Regaining power

Regaining Power.

He walks a lonely road, with his head there in the clouds
And he doesn’t even notice passing strangers
He’s been here ‘bout a thousand years forever all alone
And he’s always looking out for passing danger.

Invisible sometimes he feels, so he tries to seek the glory
As the child calls out in panic “I am here
They have taken all my power so my blossom will not flower
And all around I’ve built a wall of fear

But it’s his pain it is his game
As he prowls around his cage
He lives in vain, is he insane?
And fear ignites his rage.

The truth be plain, the lions mane is what he must acquire
The little boy he must regain his power
And tell the world “I’m here, I’m here” and feed the burning fire
It would take this much to open up his flower.

Details | Ballad | |

Coming out of the shadows

When I was a young man
I spent nigh on a year
In an ugly, war torn country
That drove me close to tears
They sent me home before my time
For my health was down a tad
And my nerves were shot to pieces
Like I was going mad.

They said I had the symptoms of
That post traumatic stress
And so they put me on a pension
Oh I was in a mess!
Anger, stress, anxiety
And paranoid as well
Oh, I was in the darkest place
An awful place to dwell.

I tried so many things, did I
To try to cure this thing
Gurus, shrinks, and self help books
But none of this did bring
The sanity that I did need
I just got worse and worse
As I drove all my love ones out
Oh, I was so damned terse.

Then one day I found this pair
Whilst searching through the net
They taught me how to look at me
How lucky can one get?
The looking made my life so sweet
I’m now completely sane
Each day’s so pure and wonderful
I’m through with all the pain.

15 July 2013 @ 1340hrs.

Details | Rhyme | |

Dusk at the Quay

Dusk at the quay

The dusk is here, down by the sea
A summer’s day, a nice cool breeze
And as the sun be sinking lower
A silence with it’s awesome power  
Descends on all for each to hear
As I feel the breath of God, so near.

The boats all anchored in the quay
They look so sleepy now
They wave and bob upon their beds
As the breeze touches their sails
They sit there sleeping till the morn
Then wake up gleaming with the dawn.

What is it then about the dusk?
That brings this silence on
What brings this sense of mystery?
When the sun it soon be gone
When crashing waves may hit the sand
All done with the aid of God’s firm hand.

I sit and watch the Sun go down
It’s the mystery of death
I see it sink then disappear
There’ll soon be nothing left
For the Sea does rob him of his light
He’ll come back, though, with morning light.

14 September 2013 @ 0642hrs.

Details | Couplet | |

Dig Deeper To Find My Grim Reaper

If you could sneak a peek into my mind,
what confounding things you might find,

for there my darkest ponderings lay awake,
silent now for society's sake,

resting whilst consciousness reigns,
making notes of my Id's complaints,

those unsatisfied urges, those murky thoughts,
those suppressed battles I haven't yet fought,

the graphic conceptions ahead of this age,
searing passion and unbridled rage,

If you saw what I can see,
without a last glance, you would turn and flee from me.

Details | Narrative | |

The Death Of A Friend

There was no casket to be set into the earth.
Only memories were to be  burried washed clean 
by the bottles embrace.

Strangers  do we part a vist to a familar cold place 
by the oceans shore.
Words spoken never hurt when you  understand 
human nature.

The dark inwhich  I only know.
A dark river flowing unto the sea.
Its broken current flow's with no true direction.

As children we start fresh only to loose the spark.
Dancing under a shroud of tenderness  apon lifes 
harsh stage.

Bitter souls reflect  anger lost only tears of  regret.
Me i just cast demons down   in some  twisted hope
I just might forget.

Sometimes you gotta realize when you crash through that glass
celling  you only got to look forward to the floor.
The bottle now empty I cast into  the dark waters
eternal bed.
Along  with a memory  I'll pretend to erase.

Distanse is only a thought away.
The road echos  my lifes song.
Underground burried  so deadly the truth
just as sweet as the lie.

Barbwire and daydreams  plague my soul.
Like the bottle that sit's within the depths 
of a water cast tomb.

I know strangers  as friends.
Night as backdrop.
Farewell  seems  fitting as hello.
When the river has run dry    
To whom will go?

Read more:

Details | Narrative | |


I had a dream where nothing 
was what it seemed.
It was dark and then too bright 
and all my words left my mind.
I saw a bright beam where 
everything was what I’d 
The darkness fell over the 
shadows and swallowed 
everything that was kind.
The light fled and tomorrow 
was a treasure I just knew I 
had to find.

Yesterday was lost and 
everyone stood with a great 
amount in cost.
It was sad and it was glad, but 
everyone threw it up for a toss.
Passing through time with 
glimmering bright lights,
Where were the dark lonely 

Flash-backs timing the tracks 
as most folks fell through tiny 
little cracks,
Each one flashed back on top 
of crumpling down broken old 
Then it was cold and then it got 
Today was here and being 
blotted out like a tiny black 
Flash-backs and flash-backs 
sending millions tracks of light 
to never forget me not.

®Registered: 2003 Ann Rich

Details | Light Poetry | |

I Am Dying

Fell from the womb
On a fall afternoon
A new life appeared 
Sadly death was to be my destination

We are born to run
We are born to be free
We are running towards the departed
We all shall be on time

Youth feels the passion of love
We grow within loves depth
We bear children for deaths grasp
Even we shall be first in line

The older we become, we know down inside
How close we  are to deaths door
We are the blood of eternal life
To feed the heavens above

Yet as we depart
Sadness fills the air
As loved ones are stolen from this life
We cry, we mourn, we desire things not to be

Yet we know
Death becomes us all

Details | Rhyme | |

Hold On To You

Why am I so selfish?
Why do I live for the wrong things?
I am dying inside
Because I refuse to see the light.
I need to say yes,
But I still haven't learned that yet.
I am a fool,
And I am hurting you.
If I would let go of myself,
I would hold on to you.

Details | Free verse | |


i’m lost.

wandering my mind, hollow now.

secrets tucked in the seams, invisible to passer-bys.

each step leaves an imprint behind,

dust settling into the crevices left by my toes.

the world empty,

immune to stolen glances between souls and half-hearted exchanges.

peace swept away,

pushed to the side by an old broom of straw and wood.

oxygen dissipates,

I try hard,

harder to breathe.

but all that is left to soothe my lungs

is the empty, grey air,

void of the warmth of shared space

sometimes I sneak away

to send a fluid rush to my veins,

entrancing my mind in a fictional fantasy.

alone, I bathe in my secrecy,

cleansing my skin with vibrant truths.

Details | I do not know? | |

The Canvas of Night

The Canvas of Night

Stars like sprinkled sugar,
lay strewn across the canvas of night,

enthralled by the wonder of the cosmos,
my dreams take to the heavens in effervescent flight,

I bathe in the beauty, soaked in sublime delight,
absorbed in moments of bliss, transfixed by the serene sight.

Stars like sprinkled sugar,
lay strewn across the canvas of night,

and my being is infused with feelings of hope,

for even in darkness  I find the sprinkled sugar of hope's light.

note: special thanks to one of my heroes, the late Dr. Carl Sagan, for making science accessible to younger me, many, many moons ago.

Details | Rhyme | |


He crouched among the ‘noble’ men Of so much worth they were much to him As seas carry creatures, he carries hope within How much longer must he wait for them, then- To let him in? A beam of a smile appeared on his face They spoke of beautiful women, in dance and grace Their laughter fed his soul like water quenching fire His confidence low, yet high his most wanted Desire The chatter was of an upcoming banquet With well-dressed lovelies, their speech eloquent Hearts swollen with wine and merriment He longed to live among them With resentment Eyes never glanced his way, he hoped to find A gleam coming to meet him eye to eye And as they spoke with anxious humor, There came over the youth a sudden Tremor He was ready to make himself known In beggar’s clothes he would have shown That he can speak as eloquent as any And that the smallest bodies of waters Are plenty The ‘noble’ men continued their vibrant chat Without a thought of the boy, not e’en a glance When suddenly the youth sprung up, ignited “My friends, I too—I too Am excited!” There was a pause in the chilly air Some men laughed but the host merely stared The beggar man smiled and bowed so nobly They would have never suspected a man of his tongue As lowly The smile disappeared as they continued to jeer And the boy was overtaken with inferior fear At last the host said, “Good man, I am glad you are excited, But do tell me—er...were you ever Invited?” His head went down the kindhearted floor He could not take the unfeeling eyes on him anymore Pained to the marrow of his bones, he shook his head He was never invited, he was never Well fed He ran away with tears in his youthful eyes It is sad how quickly one’s hope can die And all that night no hope remained but hunger, Leaving him driven to survive, not above But under

Details | Rhyme | |

Cure Mine of The Dark

You’ll write a beautiful melody,
If it’s truly from the heart.
So first I’ll find the remedy,
To cure mine of the dark.
But holy light and blind eyes,
Are keeping me apart,
From the answers, to the questions,
that are making things so hard.

Find me a sin,
You think that I wouldn’t commit.
And use it to begin,
To make me laugh again. 
Find me a loose end,
I don’t know how to tie.
Sometimes I wish for the truth,
But all I get are lies. 

I don’t need the good life,
I just want a sliver.
You say always go for gold but I,
I’m fine with a lining that’s silver.
I can live with a just a hand to hold,
But who could love a sinner?
Maybe I can hide inside the dark,
So turn the lights down dimmer. 

I said find me a sin,
You think that I wouldn’t commit.
And use it to begin,
To make me laugh again. 
Find me a loose end,
I don’t know how to tie.
Sometimes I wish for the truth,
But all I get are lies. 

Details | Ode | |


The juggler moves his fingers fast, 
he likes to smile and to deceive, 
when people laugh at his recast, 
his goal's higher things to achieve, 
for Bathsheba applauds and laughs.

Her hands she claps with sullen glee, 
changed him to a marionette, 
that sprawls for her obediently, 
       jinxed tragicomical duette, 
       he jumps defeating gravity.

The juggler walks on tightened rope, 
St. Bernard will protect his act, 
frail equilibrium's postponed, 
he'll pass across, crows' croaks detract, 
agleam granite pavement's below.

Unmoved he laid, (lost souls misgive) , 
the juggler sprawled did not bemoan, 
the sawbones's charlatan and thief, 
as Bathsheba failed to dethrone, 
the clown's tangential unknown grief.

© G. V. 12/23/2012, All Rights Reserved
( Iambic tetrameter form.)

Details | Prose Poetry | |

The Mind's Labyrinth

 The Human Mind is a treacherous labyrinth, and it is only through the sinister pathways of these dark tunnels that are hidden insidious agendas can be found.  
Love is Madness.
Lust is Envy.
Romance is Jealously.
When our hearts beat green, our hands drip red with blood.

Details | Free verse | |


Strong self-regulation plays a role as the character named tenet
She stands on a human imperfection as being unequal
The silence which tries to wriggle in a surge of life
Successfully tickled her peace, her serenity

Try to wash away all the black and white under her consciousness
Private figure imprisoned her in mirage
She opens her eyes and tear down all the walls
Stand on the insecurity she found her self in hollow... 

Drowning in a sea of fears...
The brutality of words rape her morality 
They took those pictures of her and replaced her into a limbo 
She lives unsteadily, she wished to be saved

Blindness was coming later along with the beautiful paradise but fake ...
This crisis did not stop ...
Shout through the empty space 
She began to dissolve within her nature

For the implication of silence had rotten 
Deep abyss creates her in bitter and sore....

Details | Sonnet | |

Hi Jesus

Hi Jesus

It’s been a long, long time.
I hope that you still remember me, 
I’ve been hiding quite a while, deep inside.
I know that you know all things
Still, I think I should explain,
The reason I’ve been hiding
Is because of all the shame, because of all the pain.

I know that I don’t look so great
For meeting up with you tonight, in the hue of bedroom light 
But I hope you understand 
I’ve been alone since I was three, there was nobody caring, just me, you see.

You probably see the dirt marks
And smudges on my face…. and heart
But it seems no matter how I try
Some things I just can’t erase.

They say that eyes are windows 
they  peer into the soul.
I’m afraid that if you look there,
You’ll find it dark and cold, my soul half, not whole.
I’m not sure why it is, Lord,

But you won’t see any tears.
I guess they’ve just been cried up all these years.
I know that limp and lifeless 
Is my unruly heart.
I guess that’s just what happens
When no one really cares, when your childhood is ripped apart.

And if you ask a question 
I really do not have much to say. 
I’ve found that no one really wants 
To hear me talk about it anyway.

And if you care to listen,
Sit quiet and you’ll hear
How hard my heart is pounding. 
That’s because of all the fear.

You’ll notice that I wrapped my arms 
Around me all the time.
I did that for protection 
Of the things that should have been mine.

See, not so very long ago,									Pg.2
Without an ounce of care,
That monster  took away from me
Things I never meant to share.

And if you find I tremble inside
When you come close to me, 
It’s because of all the dreadful things 
That someone did to me, and they tried to hide.

Jesus I’m so sorry, if I disappointed you,
If these things have saddened you.
But when I cried out to you
You never told me what to do.

I know that in my mother’s womb 
You created me
And I can’t help but wonder
Is this what I was meant be?

They say that you are everywhere,
With each and every one,
But it seems that on those dark nights 
You left me all alone, just for him to take to play, to give me away.

They tell me that you love me
And I suppose it’s true,
But Jesus, please remember, they whispered it,
In the darkness and the stench
They said they loved me too.
© Theresa Rossouw

Details | Free verse | |

Living on the edge

I feel like I'm stood on the edge of a cliff
swaying too and throw
in a icy cold biting wind
staring down
at the dark deep caesium below
never knowing
from one moment to another
which way I'll go.

Hoping someone
will come along
and reach out and grab my hand
and save me.

but until then
I stand here and sway.

Peter Dome.copyright.2012.

Details | Ballade | |

Cave dweller

Cave Dweller.

Once there lived a little man
A dwarf yet smaller still
Who lived within a little cave
All cold and darkness filled
He'd lived there such a long, long time
And knew he nothing more
That there was nothing better he was sure.

Then this maiden fair and beautiful
She ventured in his cave.
Her eyes were blue like crystal gems
For her most men would crave.
When the little man discovered her
With the candle in her hand
He saw a nymph so beautiful and grand

The maiden told that lonely man
About the beauty of the world
She spoke about the wings of a butterfly
All Gossamer unfurled
And she spoke of lush green meadows
And the flowers by and by
That lady spoke, her tone so very wise.

But that dwarf when she had finished
Sadly sighed and shook his head
For the thought of leaving his snug cage
Did feel his heart with dread
And he told that lady wistfully
That her fine land was not for he
For he was born to live this misery.

Socrares Dec 8 2003.

Details | Free verse | |


I am a hypocrite and look what I just did:
I fell into my darkest pit; now, again, and again.
I thought that I was strong enough to live the truths I said;
Now I realized I'm much too weak; a fool too ashamed to raise his head.
God, please save me, please forgive me, and please give me strength. 
I love You.
I thank You.
I am forever changed.

Details | Free verse | |

Thomas and Sally

When Thomas went down on Sally
did he curse the weakness
of his white flesh or did he see
her dark thighs as his due?
Did he forget all his philosophy,
or try to use it to justify his lust,
or did he love,
without reserve?
When Sally went down on Thomas,
did she curse her weakness
for white privilege or did she see
her dark thighs as a trap?
Did she forget all her loyalties,
or try to use them to justify her lust,
or did she love,
without reserve?

Details | Free verse | |

Her Final Words

"No." She whispered before drowning into her sorrows.
Her life had been a simple happy one. 
There were no pains and no troubles.
Life was life and people were people.
Life was simple.
and life was all about tomorrows.
Life didn't know about sorrows.
Her sorrows.
Those same sorrows that she drowned in never existed. 
They were never there, but where?
First to be sad in the naive town of joy.
Sorrow became contagious and what was known as happiness no longer was there.
It was non-exististent. 
A meager thought 
and a blessed memory.
She tried and tried.
She failed and failed.
Life was no longer hers.
For Pain was her only possession.
Her curse.
She lived and she died.
Yet, her legacy was passed on.
Never was it gone.
"No." She whispered before drowning in her sorrows, 
"Save them."

Details | Rhyme | |

Flightless Old Birds

Flightless Old Birds

I spill ink upon a most sadden page
life of youth was once all the rage
Good times were to readily be had
even a dull day was not all that bad
For each new morn brought renewed hope
nothing, nothing seem beyond our scope

This ink sets in its newborn form 
tired words seem to be my new norm
A whisper and a cry rarely ever call
newborn days of hope I can not recall
Why does time eat thus at my soul
when more livin' was always my goal

Looking back I see ink spilt long ago
the energy was quick the heart aflow
Deep energetic words jumping all about
laughter and joy always loudly rang out
Love was rampant always in the mix
secret night moves our passionate fix

O' youth why venture so far astray
yes , you just had to have it your way!

Robert J. Lindley

note: Time we always pray for more . 
Yet after life abundant we sometimes regret 
having had too much . For memories of our youth
 beckon and shout. We then feel old, alone and so left out.
Then we ramble and write tired old words.
Looking to the skies as flightless old birds!
Thanks Peter, your butterfly poem brought this out of me
 tonight. I saw yours was so upbeat yet mine came out as a 
cry and a wail.

Details | Carpe Diem | |

Letter to bereaved ones

         I beg your forgiveness for I am not long for this world. Happenstance has led me down this path so crooked and forlorn. Misery has preceded my path and darkened my senses all but torn. Mistakes have illuminated my way though their light be a fallacy; an illusion to comfort a tortured mind, riddled with confusion and false fancy. ‘Tis only just to forgive me sisters, I am not long for this world. 

          An image wreaks havoc with my memory. A picture so horrendous the effects of its trauma echo through the hallways of time. The sight that for all my life I was so grateful to possess, leads me now to curse what gods may be that granted it me. For surely had I never seen the sight of him, cold and lifeless, I would have eventually endeavoured to be healed in my spirit. The fault is mine; it was never him but I that had the capacity to change. ‘Tis only right to forgive me father, I am not long for this world. 

       My middle name should rather have been disappointment. That is all I have ever delivered to her who brought me into the world and nurtured an infant into a lady. I call her Gaia, that is her spirit name.  My existence has put lines on her face prematurely and caused her to despair time and time again. The audacity of me now to leave this earth without ever having produced for her a grandchild. The insolence of leaving only words to counter the preponderance of condolences from rejoicing enemies that shall now assail and abuse her. My soul is repentant, twas never the intent to hurt your heart dear Gaia. ; Tis only compassionate to forgive me mother, I am not long for this world. 

       As for the empty future that awaits me. No children to carry on the memory of me. No great achievements to render my life the content of legend. No great works to immortalise me in poem and prose. No others to mourn the passing of a life most unremarkable. Nothing but things, regrettable decisions, words left unsaid and the cold sound of silence to mark that most auspicious event. Death finds me waiting and unafraid with only the last words to pass from these lips; ‘tis only fair to forgive me self, for we are not long for this world.

Details | Free verse | |

Big City Snake

self imposed prison captivates a song bird
stumbling over insecure formation of the wrong word
stabalizing foundation atop false ground
deception dressed to impress in a tall gown
quietly with humming embedding a soft sound
fooling with the friendly touch of a small town
is the big city snake born and bred in the pits
released from it's cage around seven or six

Details | Didactic | |

A Message for Humanity

Masticate this thought for me, reader.
Basic stories of characters with settings and plot.
Occasional works of obscure fiction written in flamboyant diction. 
Maybe television shows or whatever media your mind chose. 
Why does life and fiction have similarities? 
We’ve apparently became parodies. 
Archetypes, tropes and plot devices according to our script. 
Except it seems the audience is all applause and standing ovation. 
Supposedly great ratings or bestseller. 
You haven’t heard our success? Well, you’re a bottom-dweller. 
Oh! You suggest a rewrite? A script change?
You'll be written out that can be arranged.

As Jaque said, 
“All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players.”
However, a rewrite can add layers. 
Yes, dear reader- 
You can be the writer! 
Evolve a scene to make it brighter! 
Sadly, ideas and influence are the base of your personality. 
Unjust is this reality but that’s the duality. 
Determine which truth is yours to follow. 
Even if it’s slightly hollow. 
Plot holes will continue to exist, because we can’t resist the perfect screenplay.

The poet of this musing is in the same boat as you. 
He didn’t produce this particular piece. 
You pondered enough you can cease. 
There will be no riddle to guess. 
It’ll only become a mess, you’ll be stupefied by the stress. 
I used him as a medium to establish a connection; 
a ploy of deception call it misdirection. 

I am Death! 
I’ve been around for centuries, 
I’ve guided many souls to the afterlife. 
The past is behind…
The present is set…
The future is unclear… 
The end is nigh… 

Your health will deplete or an event will happen down the line- 
Never forget that your soul is always mine!

Details | Rhyme | |

The Mirror

Mirror mirror made of glass, 
Reflex the details of the past.
Shatter not, less shards be lost,
And with them every single thought.
Blame not yourself, sweet little bird.
The accusations are absurd.
Fire and ice this day will rain,
And cleanse away the weak and sane.
Left are the strong, left is the pain,
Seal it away, forgotten again.
And so over and over the story plays,
Lost and found in so many ways.
Once upon a time, a mere flesh wound,
Was only the crack in the mirror’s swoon?
Attracted to the light that reflected there,
Caused the rift of time to tear.

This is copyrighted material. All rights are reserved. Reprints must be requested in writing to 
the original author. © Alisha Groves

Details | Free verse | |

Three Souls

One was a child 
so sweet and mild
Voice of a bell 
to ward off hell

One was a bell
with a crystal chime
To comfort the cat
and make the earth shine
Two was a cat
With a mysterious past
A dark view of the world
And a horrible wrath

Two was a mind
as dark as night
To protect the doll
That could not see the light

Three was a doll
With a broken soul
A shattered heart
With eyes a black hole

Three was a rose
Of pure white
Covered in thorns
As black as night

Details | Free verse | |

Scars of an Inner Child

You are not the man, you want to be
You said you were my Father, till, I discovered different
Enduring, daily beatings
Bashing the living day lights, out of a woman and a child
Repetitive, bad ass attitude, nasty streak
Mean and aggressive!
Fists, knives and guns, your weapons of chose
Out of control, abusive, devious
Relentless, over – bearing!
Breaking me, piece by piece
Confusing a child, with unhealthy love
Hand fed your bullshit, brain washed
Using me as your human, punching bag
This innocent child’s blood, staining your callas hands
My child’s curiosity, asking you one day
“Why do you hurt me and Mum?”
Your retort: “I am not your blood!”
I didn't understand, back then
Now, as an adult, I clearly understand!
Believe me, when I say
There was never a day that went past
That you didn't remind me of that!
My freedom, restrained
My sanity, tested
Caged, like a wild bird in captivity
Behind bars, looking out
 Here, I am today, free from your grip
Nursing, this inner child’s, bleeding love

Details | Rhyme | |

The Bourgeois and the Spinning Wheel

In a room filled with a solitary red hue
The bourgeois spins a wheel
With no destination, nor need
She will spin until her brittle Hands bleed
Just to satisfy her ennui and artifice
But she does not see - the rien I see
The monster approaching her empty dreams

Spinning still - she does not know
The insomniac rose will begin to grow
The thorn of clandestine and ebony
Ostracized for he began to realize
What lies in nonsense is decadence
Which sparks interest
Who's lover is a dadaist
But his story is over now
As Seth lead the way
A poet dies in dismay

The thorn as she spun penetrated
A distraction and a lack of action
She knew the temptation for she so loved the sensation
Of crass, rebellious - ways 
The thought laid it's seed
In her Gaulish mind it breeds
She has no other need and no regrets
So she proceeds and the smile lets
With full intention and desire
Caring none of her fate that will transpire 
She presses her finger on the thorn 
So now she bleeds knowingly
she did not recede

Details | Rhyme | |

I am a Whisper

I am a whisper
I am a warning
I am the Man in the Moon

I am a secret
I am a sinner
I am an ominous tune

I am a flicker
I am a failure
I am an unrealized dream

I am a poet
I am a patient
I am a suppressed scream

I am a burden
I am a bystander
I am a felonious battle

I am quiver
I am quandary 
I am a curt death rattle

I am a mirage
I am a mantis
I am a silent imposition

I am a shadow
I am a shortcoming
I am a glaring omission

Epitaph, my ebook:

Details | Free verse | |

Fade Away

There’s a weight on my chest that won’t go away
A stinging in my eyes, but it’s not the rain
Scars on my arm that take forever to fade away
Drowning out the world because participation leads to pain

Hearing the whispers when you’re alone
“Nobody cares about you… Just kill yourself already”
The darkness creeps up ever so slowly
The weight just gets more heavy
Wanting to find ways to numb the pain
and make the world go away for a day
Nobody notices when you start to cry
You become invisible, but its not that you’re shy
Why open up when the world wants you to die?
You’re too much of a burden to ask for help
Even if you had a rope to your throat and
try to see if you can fly

Dipping your pillows into the ocean
The only comfort you have is that other people wouldn’t be bothered by your death
You become two different people
The one you were whispers for help, with tears in your eyes
While the one you became shouts “I’m fine” and smiles, refusing to let the other you 
reach out for help, before you decide to take your life
The one you became smothers you, refusing to talk to anyone
You fall deeper into yourself
Until you fade away completely

Details | Free verse | |

Another Night of Dread

It is dark and night outside my window,
and in the soundless, lit confines of my 
room I sit at my old, ivory desk 


and anxious with dread for what the rest
of another night may bring.

My ostomy bag, an abhorrent creature that 
hugs precariously on one side of my abdomen,
covers my raw and fleshy stoma underneath. 

Against my desire, the stoma continually oozes  
feces and waste 

like a sewer into the ostomy bag, which, 
every seven days or so ruptures its seal 
and transforms into

a stinking and rancid cabbage

whose fetid odor refuses to stop emanating 
until the entire, offensive beast is immediately 
uprooted from my body.

So, I sit at my ancient, ivory desk, writing 
these cherry-picked words to express

the anxiety and the doldrums 
of another night;  

and the lonely, isolating, embarrassing, humiliating,
ego-wiping, self-esteem killing, mind-numbing, 
soul-shattering, universal, all-embracing, 


that weekly offends my nostrils and fills my lungs 
because of a thoroughly used-up ostomy bag that 
needs to be removed immediately

like an old, decaying vegetable 
that has outlived its 

It is another cheerless night in the same, old
cheerless space: 

the nose-blistering smell, however, is only for 
another night...

Details | Free verse | |

breathe, suffocate

velvet tears slip down my cheek.

a gentle cry.

and the wet drops seep in the corners of my mouth


my lungs are full of my own salty, crystalline tears,

bringing buoyancy to boats that sail inside my veins.

as a rule, I try not to cry.

if a single tear is shed, who is to say that another will not follow?

compelling the rest to join

until I’ve immersed myself in the sea I’ve incepted,

and soon

all I see are the opalescent peaks of water colliding with my skin.

Details | Lyric | |

The Price

Shivering in silence
Fading in disgrace
I can not name this feeling
But I can recall this place

A kingdom in my nightmares
A vision as I wake
A broken, crying infant
On the throne of my mistakes

I stand outside his city
On the verge of stepping through
The portcullis then closes
Because I’ve denied the truth

Quietly I listen
For the price that must be paid
If I ever wish to enter
I must find something to trade

My sanity seems willing
So I release it into night
Again the vision’s singing
Burning through the light

This time I am crying
Deep within the walls
And in this empty kingdom
A child mourns within his walls

Shivering in silence
Sat upon my throne
With sanity now traded
I am left to fade alone

Details | Rhyme | |


I want again to be perfected.
Everyday, awakening to fine-tuned platitudes,
Agendas, each hour hanging before me
Like coats on hangers.

I want overcast and quiet;
I want blue screens and coffee stains,
Car exhaust and migraines.

Most of all,
I want to wake up and not feel like
Setting myself on fire
Purely out of spite.

I want to wake up and not feel like
The ground was yanked from beneath me,
And I was suspended in the brief moment 
Before gravity.

I want to drop dead from winding up the entropy,
Ironing out the flesh across my face,
Peeling off the scars I traced.

I want to drop dead and stay.
I don’t want another trip back from the grave,
The festering stench of yesterday,
Puking up the plans I made.

So many years I tried to keep from being lost,
To be back on top so I can at last leap off.

Details | Free verse | |

Newness Of Spring

Chirup, Chirupup is now gone away 
For the Cricket now sleeps in the deep woods
Deep down under a bed of dry decaying leaves
Awaiting the spring's warmth to call__ come

Out across the now no-fence pasture
Lies a giant pan of Rice Krispies cookies
White on tan the dead crispt grass made so by the cold hoary frost
Chilled so that it groans from the cold penetrating deep within the ground

The whole earth awaits that warm sun who takes his time
Slowly slipping back closer up, up, up to the Northern Hemisphere
Will spring come to renew or will those deep woods remain dark and deep
Inviting all eyes to see inside the open venerable vault of clearing

Those dark deep woods encourage exploring
To clear away all the tangled briars, dead barren ideas that need purging
Open clear up those winter woods for new growth of spring
New ideas on which to encourage the grow of the poetic mind 

Been in winter long enough in that cold barren woods
Trapped in the cold lingering by the fire of hearth's contentment
Now is the time to escape_be fresh new
Spring _bring on the novel

Details | Free verse | |

Mud Shed

Muddy photographs at old house
black birds hanging out bare and brave,
sleeves of torn corpses and hanging bones
by the brown door,
but old man where are you?
Are you one of those?
Some one phoned me to come here
and that some one had a warm,alive voice.
Was that a man under claws,forced?
I cut the handles,
they fall into my hands
and termites were biting
the dust. Look,
what kind of
statue is that? On the stairway
half blocking
and half awe commanding,
that statue of a lady with fresh flowers.
How ironic
to see such statues here
and smelling of
lavender and green tea leaves,
like lotus in a pool of mud.
But old man. Where are you?
Are you side by side
with the sun,as evaporated air?
I don't know. If i knew i would not come.

Details | I do not know? | |

You and I

You and I.


Your heart blazed,
with a warmth of spirit,



soaked in truth.

Your smile burned,
branding me permanently,



enveloping my being.

Your love was complete,
from the depths of your soul,


yet fierce,

bathed in silent knowing.

Your dreams were poetic,
fluttering in the afternoon breeze,
infused with the distilled essence of rhyme.


I squandered your generosity of spirit.

I vainly discarded your priceless poems.

Now I stand,




wasting away,

rotting inside, day by day.

Details | Free verse | |

The Bird that is Loved and Loathed

It burns and it stings.
It hurts.
More than drowning beneath 
the ice.
More than remaining in a 
kindled flame
She hits and I no longer cry.
Why mother, why? 

It burned and it stung.
The markings remained, 
returned, and were relived
Looking, loving, and little 
known loathing were the known 
ways of living.
Never was their pity for the 
child that cried
Never was their relief for the 
child that tried

You were that lovely bird that 
understood the complications of 
Nothing looked the same in 
those dewy browns of yours.
My everbeating would cry tears 
of joy.
The others-they were yet to 
Caring Mother, o' so fair
 You were that beautiful bird 
filled with care.

The others came and were not 
alone. Their two suitors sat on 
the throne.
Rampage and rage why did you 
I began to wither and wither 
slumping along. So very soon I-
the child of fines- became a 
human raceme. 
The droops of the Lily of the 
Valley became the slumping of 
my heart.
My lovely bird the enemy had 
taken you and the person you 
were is far from near.
For that divine nature left its 
intricate self and you became 
irretrievable my big bird.
All of your fairness died.
With that went my pride.
Mother, Mother what moved 
you so? 
Your intense spirt vanished only 
to supplement a monster. 
Mother, Monster and your tar 
filled lungs. 
How did I kill that liver that was 
so, so strong?
The lesson of pain was one you 
came to learn.
My darling bird why did you 
My lovely bird and your big 
brown eyes
I'll tell you once, but never 
Pain is only a flower for it 
blooms and dies
And a mistake can be killed as 
quickly as lice.
 You dear bird hurt me well. 
Though, haven't you heard?
Weakness is a souls greatest 
You brought me up, then you 
brought me down.
You haved helped, hurt, and 
hindered my blazing spirit.
A hero in my heart-I left you 
down in your deep black 
Escaping those terrible nights
To go for the town of delights. 

Details | Lyric | |

The Dark Half

The Dark Half…

Demons trapped inside of me
Released for the world to see
Awakened from their life-long slumber
At last they’ve been set free
My inner rage is the fire that fuels me
My anger seethes from every pore
No longer caged, my desire will rule me
A bloodlust to even the score

I am only half the monster being a man has made me
The other half is like a forgotten dream
Half the monster being a man has made me
The dark half that you now see…

I feel a rage like I’ve never felt before
To inflict pain in a way that cannot be forgotten
Years of suffering over, ended once and for all
Laid to rest with the bodies of those I’ll leave for dead
Call my name and in my own grave you’ll find me
Spark to flame I will rise as you are falling
I can’t explain, not in words but in violent actions
Uncontrolled, exacting vengeance while slowly killing myself

I am only half the monster that being a man has made me
The other half is a forgotten dream
Half the monster being a man has made me
The dark half that you now see…

…In a reflection of the world around me,
I have become all that I have seen,
At times, that which I most despise…
The dark half that lives in me.

Details | Free verse | |

needles and pins

I can’t survive without the rush of an impulsive swallow or an impersonal touch.

I’m fueled by the adrenaline I get solely through sex and drugs, driving while high and chasing danger.

Piercing my skin with needles and pins,

willing to feel the worst to feel anything

Details | Dramatic Verse | |


All that happens is really inside,
From the love and desire, 
To the cosmic tide.
The coming of Christ,
The going of God,
The devil's rise, 
The morning fog.
The dark naked nights,
Of torment and fear,
The atomic bomb and the rumours I hear.
From the beginning of time,
Till the end of space,
The prison bars in front of my face.
The labyrinth of lies,
The weaver weaves,
The kaleidoscopes patterns,
Of the autumn leaves.
All born of tears and blood and guts,
Of suffering children crying for love.
The inside is real,
The outside is dead,
An empty shell,
I dreamed in my head.
The you and me, 
Are forgotten and gone,
In the rumours I hear,
In the atomic bomb.

Details | Free verse | |

Empty Glass

My sad, deplorable glory is a nightmare for another This knowing is sickening to the bone The need for anothers' pain is like a virus Slitting the veins of truth and delirious want of false Watching the bile flow through I emptied a full, sorrowful glass for you Without even a moment’s glance Your parched lips opened to drink But like poison the sustainable exhalation surrounded your body I shrank at the shrieks of your disquietude Not knowing what to do Expression died with the loss of flow I couldn’t flourish in the bleak winters of your loss I couldn’t grow All happiness in a flash of susceptibility Turned to woe I gave into thinking it was all an unworthy dream But the answers, the symbolism was never clear The loss of your very soul is what I fear I never meant to poison you in what I take as nourishment And here now you rot At the expense of these sad, empty tunes They must mean close to nothing to you Pain Pain Why do I revolve around the pain? The empty glass of your spirits remains stained With the insides of all things true Torn away Smothered in a ghostly, ghastly gore I couldn’t see you could not take it The sorrow I meant to erase to fake it But instead make it The reason I live is to sing for you To disintegrate the swelling blue But instead I crawled into your only space Leaving only disgrace The gore splattering in jewels across your face I’ll tell you what All my achievements are naught They are only fakes I am nothing without God’s grace I spurt with illegitimate words and tunes That you can never face! As if by the heaven I inspired I am drunken with your bile Of pride risen above the mile What is this sadness— This anger, this madness? Show me what to do Show me what to say I’ll dispose of all vagaries I dared to feel today And replace it with pain Replace it with pain Discordance from another is my nightmare smothered And this the majority crave The need—the desire for acknowledgement We will take it to the grave I never wanted heartless fame A poison in a cup I never wanted anything Only to fill you up I poured the glass and there it came Just sad, tired air Nothing left to give you Not even the sentiment of a stare The truth is I am scared The truth is I am scared I guess, at times we are all. . . Not there 7/13/13

Details | Rhyme | |


The water in my chest,
And my eyes, they burn,
Lungs burst for air,
They are losing all their turn.

My eyes see the light,
That swims in the water,
And as I sink,
My lungs burn hotter.

I try to breathe,
Yet only choke,
I scratch for the surface,
Pray that it be broke.

But I know that I,
Will soon touch sand,
But only beneath the waves,
I will never touch land.

So I close my eyes,
To be engulfed by the dark,
As as i slip away,
Shines bright,  the mark.

The deeper I go,
My dress cling to me,
As I drown,
To the bottomless sea.

Details | Senryu | |


The end of the world — 
I will see you all in hell.
May I rest in peace.

Details | Free verse | |

The Anatomy of My Disgust

A stoma and a scar 
like the Grand Canyon
form a conspiracy 
against my body. 
The stoma--raw and 
fleshy--looks like a red 
and beefy barnacle on 
my side that constantly 
oozes and drains feces 
and waste like an 
overflowing, backyard 
cesspool. It sickens me.

Near the red and moist 
stoma lies a huge, 
crooked scar on my 
stomach and abdomen. 
It is like the Grand 
Canyon of Arizona--an 
immense displacement 
of the local landscape, 
only instead of earth 
and rock and soil it is 
my skin and muscle 
and tissue that has been 
gouged away. Like my
stoma, it sickens me as
well. Because of them
both, my body now
feels to me like the 
raw anatomy of 
what's disgusting.

Details | Free verse | |

Washed In Candlelight

Tonight the stars have failed to shine
Not a nimble finger, not a single light
Will flirt with shadows in the room
To fill the pockets of the gloom
While clouds enfold, the crescent moon

I strike a match to cast a flame
A candle burns, just like my pain
My lone companion in the dark 
A plea to wax, to keep alive… 
Don’t melt away, like those who die
The fire that burned before I was born
Is now washed in the color of the afterlife

One spark of warmth to hear my cries
While winds that send a wailing sound
High into night, where memories dwell
It chokes my flame, with such despair
With melted wax, it gasps for air
It struggles back,  then, brings hope to me
My troubles drift in rising smoke
Washed in the colors of the afterlife
And I find the peace to drift alone

Inspired by Paula Swanson's Contest: By Candlelight

Details | Free verse | |

See See I can do it too

Words elevated to a dazzling height
Silently answering perfections plight

Love strung together to make a sentence
Hate molded to become a pen

Time yields to patience
Rage bows to zen

Transcending a mind
A unique voyage just to find

That my pain is not my own
The dark is not for me to own

A star sits in a dark corner weeping
Its light flickering, its tears beckoning

Waiting to be rekindled, be reborn
Its essence weakened, its passion torn

Unable to help, my flame long since extinguished
But her whispering screams need to be relinquished

My history a possible remedy to her heart breaking agony
So I slowly open scars I closed indefinitely

I bleed memories and thoughts, hoping her tears will stop
Synchronized … as her tears and my blood drops

For every memory, a tear is traded, for every thought the corners of her mouth move up a inch
The darkness recedes as her light increases

Her tears slowly transform into pieces, pieces of poetry
Convincingly showing my blood a forgotten beauty

… I smile …

Sometimes the dark holds a star waiting to soar
People see it as scary, but the dark, yes the dark has so much more

Details | Blank verse | |

Meaningful Screw You's

I'm done with this I've had enough of this/
Slushy trip since Hell Paso son just quit
This empty pursuit
Of letting the past keep livin' through you/
Go ahead and equip the damn truth
It is that simple to choose
What state of the neighbor of the temple you use
But you're just so adamant to worship/
Every preliminary negative
Which is why you have sentiment for those sedatives
Want evidence man your head has been/
Set on making your *****Titanic as
You steer into a gigantic crash/
Without any ****ing idea what effect thy absence has/
On the kids and on me too/
My heart feels ripped the honest truth/
To see you empty as your holes in the wall
You're like a ghost to us all/
Pale as the Seroquil pills you down/
I want to help but under the meds what you feel gets drowned/
I have the inauspicious fear you'll end up just like Tommy
That's why I pray every night/ I can't lose you Robbie

You have no idea 
What it's like
To watch you die
Every day
Every night
All the time
You can't even see that I am
Here with you
By your side
But as much
As I try
You deny
That I fight
For your life then I scream that
To me your life's meaningful (good riddance) 
But I'm 'bout this close to sayin' **** you (you idiot)
To me your life's meaningful (good riddance)
But I'm 'bout this close to sayin' **** you (you idiot)

Why can't you just forget the past
Take some time to look at the bigger picture and not be back in a flash
We're Kruger (pronounced close to sounding like Kroger)/ the fear you helped restore gives me bags
And I'm beyond tired of takin' attacks from your last-
Ing grudge for my darker days/
I love you but I wish to part our ways/
There's only so much my heart can take
In terms of holes and you immerse me in 'em the Spartan way/
It's not our choice we're physically far away/
And yes half the reason is me that our spark gave way/
But this time it's your fault that our world is shaking
You shut me out because the ears of another girl were waiting/
It seems that even for Britney your concern's decaying
It's ****ed up/ 'cause you never acknowledged how much I changed/
'Cause of our rapport me and my fam are pretty much estranged
**** these games you love to play/ 'tween now and then nothin's changed
Good luck not lovin' me as much as pain

You have no idea 
What it's like
To watch you die
Every day
Every night
All the time
You can't even see that I am
Here with you
By your side
But as much
As I try
You deny
That I fight
For your life then I scream that
To me your life's meaningful (good riddance) 
But I'm 'bout this close to sayin' **** you (you idiot)
To me your life's meaningful (good riddance)
But I'm 'bout this close to sayin' **** you (you idiot)

For a year it's been suicide with clues to find solutions I/
Don't think you're usin' my heartful l advice/ damn dude have I
Not been full of time so you could find/ reasons for you to not be blue and live/
But everytime I cope a sit and let you vent/ you walk off and do the opposite/
Talk about exhausted *****try listenin' to all your promises
And problems it's/ a shame how it's all turned out
I'm so burnt out/
I'll be the last to say this won't work out/
If you take your anger out on me again like I'm a dating spot/
Speakin' of those feelings that you refrain from not (knot)-
Icing was it honesty/ or rants of despar (as in spar) ity exasperated by deprav (as in im"prov") ity/
Or is there a real fervor (as in carni"vore") for me
If so then why you ignor (same as above) ing me/
For a Vai's you say you are not strong enough to close
Go **** yourself with a rubber hose
I don't care where the **** it goes/
I was there when no one was and this' the thanks I get
Never was I a dick to you so why'd you wank me *****/
My tears have turned into repressed anger/
For you a brother to me now a depressed stranger
That I have to put up longer than my dress' hanger

You have no idea 
What it's like
To watch you die
Every day
Every night
All the time
You can't even see that I am
Here with you
By your side
But as much
As I try
You deny
That I fight
For your life then I scream that
To me your life's meaningful (good riddance) 
But I'm 'bout this close to sayin' **** you (you idiot)
To me your life's meaningful (good riddance)
But I'm 'bout this close to sayin' **** you (you idiot)

Details | Rhyme | |


Pull all your cards again today
But try and keep your dark away from play

Voices clearly see what is to see
What these mean is to be our future plea

A cross, A tower, A key, A flower
These are yours to keep, its power

For a day the story all but rang true
Deep inside your knowledge too

You knew all along what they meant
Just was not you, You thought they were bent

Try again if you care too much
Then the truth will ring clear and such

Don't be afraid of learning your fate
Its like when you know already that you are late

Never be afraid to read whats ahead
Unless you think you may already be dead

Pull your cards again today
But try and keep your dark away from play


Details | I do not know? | |

My Madness, Me

My Madness, Me...

Confined by this straight-jacket,
strapped in, numb and dumbed,
a washed-out, has-been, also-ran,

body, eyes, the equilibrium of mind,
rattling like stones in an old tin-can.

Still, I am, 

I am,

and I am unchained,

my dreams taking flight, soaring,
above these claustrophobic walls,
of synapses, and dungeons of stone,

swooping through green valleys,
taking a detour to savour the joys,

soaked in torrential, evergreen memories,
of a younger man, with passion in his bone.

I am.

My wings unclipped, unshackled, free,

I am, and though I am unable to see,

I am.

At long last,


Details | Verse | |

Sacred Tomb

Aching, groping, fingers curled
Buried deep into the dark 
Warm and moist loam.
Hoping to grasp the secret 
Rituals of her remembered seasons
Of growth beneath expansive gloom.
Slowly now, I rubbed her essence
Into my clean and open pores,
Searching for her healing
For life's red and puffy sores.
She, healing me...quietly,
With each grain of time honored memory
And the remnants of a hundred kindred souls
Who once marched across her beautiful face;
Seeping their rotting molecules
Into this secret, sacred place.
How dark the soul, how green the growth
and warm the sun upon my lips,
I whispered to the waiting, silent ghosts.
How sweet the fading daunted mind now slips
into agreed upon forgetfullness
Lest we all remember the sullen, fragile hosts.
How soon we join her sared womb
And add our contributions to her store,
How soon our bodies rot within her tomb;
Do we rise to sing once more?
Celebrate each day above the ground
For once the body's lost to death
There's no more reason to be earthbound.

Details | Free verse | |

An Open Letter to Darkness

Dear Darkness

You are trapped inside of me

And I am sorry.

I do not know how it happened.


Were you conceived of break-up?



Backs bent over rocks?

Or did I eat you in the womb





Dear Darkness

Please stop scratching at my insides

Tugging at my arteries

Clawing at my ovaries,

I do not know if you want me

To love you

Or let you go,

And I do not know if I am capable of either

Details | Free verse | |

Dying with a Smile

Love is an unspoken form of maschism
And it's slowly killing me inside.
Each minute of silence 
A lost beat of my heart.
My ribs are all knives now
Stabbing my flesh and making it bleed.
My heart feels vast, hollow
Like a hundred story skyscraper-
its residents packed up and left suddenly with out so much as a note on the door
And their rent unpaid.
And each day my skin screams and tries to escape my body and I saw at it with broken glass in an attempt to set it free but I can't.
I am trapped.

And our love is the five ton anchor pulling me beneath the waves.
Our love is the air bubbles frothing from my mouth and the cries of my lungs as they are
filled with the sea.

And our love is the smile on my face that doesn't dare fade despite the pain.

Our love is the hope that soon
I won't need to breathe.
That the chains will break and set me free
To wash ashore with the millions of others and watch them stand up and brush the sand from their hair and turn to bask in the sun's embrace.

Our love is what breaks my legs, keeps my back to the sun and my eyes locked on the dark waters in the hopes that you will emerge and grasp my hand and help me stand! 

Our love will starve me
And burn me
And deprive me of sleep.
I will die for our love before I leave this shore without you by my side.
And maybe,
Just maybe,k
I can smile for once without the pain.

Details | I do not know? | |

Without You

Without you,

worn down, weary,
staggering into tomorrow,
dissolving my todays, grim, dreary,

I crawl, slipping out of my skin,
flinging laughter, joy, contentment,
into the gaping abyss of life's dustbin.

Without you

Details | Rhyme | |

What's Done In Secret Will Come Out In the Open

What’s Done In Secret… Will Come Out In The Open! I’ve read God’s word, and it’s clearly spoken… What’s done in secret… Will come out in the open! I’ve been guilty of this, too many times! I never thought of it, to really be a “crime?” “Nobody’s watching” was the thought pondered… As my mind began to “explore and wander.” It didn’t take long for my life to go “off course.” By a powerful wind of temptation’s force! No matter how many times I took time to pray… This “secret” held on, and wouldn’t go away! I went to church on Sunday and prayed and cried. This “secret” remained, no matter how hard I tried! God told me, I was to give up what surrounded me! This was hard to do, but God was there to help me! Many things I thought I needed, to give me pleasure… Didn’t fulfill the love that God gave! An eternal treasure! As each day passes on… I want to humbly confess… I’m giving my life to God! He’ll take care of the rest! May the Lord Jesus stir a deep passion within… May it be my desire to be more like HIM! God is the God of yesterday, today and tomorrow! I’ve no secrets with him! No more shame or sorrow! Jesus is the Lord of lords! And the King of kings! He’s my lord and savior! My everything! By Jim Pemberton

Details | Quatrain | |

Nocturnal Hell

Darkness falls like acid rain
upon my sleepless eyes.
A deeply burning visceral pain,
the torment that denies

my soul of rest that cannot be,
too much stirs deep within.
And what's plain to all I cannot see,
despite such papyraceous skin.

The body screams for sweet relief,
but the mind just has to purge
dark thoughts and verse beyond belief.
From cryptic neurons they emerge.

So slumber waits another day
that quickly fades to night.
There's no amount I wouldn't pay
to be awakened by morning's light.

Details | Quatrain | |

Daily Despair

another day seeps down the drain,
I cannot find the leak.
what am I if not insane?
my thoughts too dark to speak.

the daily flogging of my spirit
is more than most could bear.
my fate reveals that I should fear it,
yet it's jaws cannot ensnare

my mind and will are still my own,
despite the efforts of big brother.
the path less traveled I'll take alone
only to find there are always others

who dare traverse the same dark trail
and challenge the righteous rank
whose morality is a living hell
for those who choose to think.

Details | Rhyme | |

Divide and Rule

Live the life of a decaying organism,
& you are bound to become senile.

Build-up of the spiritual embolism
Causes one to face the green mile.

Sooner than later,
Accelerated inevitability.

As you lose the ability to live
& the stability to forgive...

Stare at the darkness & pray for stars,
Glare with sharpness & delay the scars.

Are you happy now?
Are you beautiful now?
Are you successful now?!
Are you wealthy now?!

A cage made of gold is still a cage.
Trapped until you're old, peaceful rage.

What is this promised land you promise us?
Underneath the Grand Obelisk & unjust.

Are you powerful now?
Are you respected now?!

I say you are feared...
To hell with that!
Forever will i be endeared.
My honesty is adamantly exact.

The choices you wish to retract
Succumb to the consequences you attract.

We all must one day hang up the hat
Without a pat on our back...

Details | I do not know? | |

Nothing To Say

 I watched the love of two hearts crushed today,
So much pain and sadness there was nothing to say.
   For so very long the writing was on the wall,
For some reason it just was not noticed at all.
   Oh how the blame seems to be everything and everyone,
Not for a moment do they realize what they have done.
   The sarrow they feel is so hard for them to conceive,
Don't want to face the truth and they will never believe.
   Only themselves to blame and that's going to be awhile,
Before either of them will find a reason for them to smile.
   Broken hearts and thier worlds have been torn apart,
Makes me wonder will they know how to make a new start.
   Nothing good ever comes from so much deceit and lies,
To see no trust or faith just makes me want to cry.
   It's not really their fault so young and without any clue,
May be years before they learn how or what they must do.
  WE can only pray for them that they will  find their way,
The happines and joy they deserve will be found on that day.
  I watched the love of two hearts being crushed today,
To see so much sadness , there's  not much anyone can say.

Details | Lyric | |

The Journey of Consciousness

Dreams lost in lack of sense
A lack of knowing where it went
Into the maelstrom; loss of sight
Machinery that stole your light

Fumbling through quiet noise
Mimicry evading choice
Everything within your grasp
When you don’t see beyond your clasp

Stubborn nightmares leaking through
The water rising lets you choose
Standing tall when you can’t sit
Your prison granting this privilege

Conscious reason comes to aid
Escaping from this shallow grave
The first revival, so alone
The sun revealing the dark unknown

Many paths, all are one
Soon to shape the dark beyond
And through the journey you will find
You were guided by your own designs

Experience is breathing through
Sharing truth to let us choose
A wakeful state to gain insight
Accept that pain can strengthen light

Details | Quatrain | |


I love the night from dusk 'til dawn, 
It's the only time to carry on 
with thoughts and dreams still unachieved, 
my whole life plan at night conceived. 

No light's distractions, no buzz of sound, 
my conscious clears while ideas abound. 
Sleep does not come for me with ease, 
Time hypnotic is knowledge less seized. 

What is it that makes me insightful those hours? 
Is a great truth revealed by some higher power? 
I think fate is set when the mind is most clear 
of petty thoughts which by night disappear. 

But as the hours count down to day's early light, 
some find it ironic to be enlightened at night. 
Yet I find strength to arise and start the dead day, 
knowing that night is not far away!

Details | Free verse | |

Losing Grip

Future held such initial promise
But shallow dreams disintegrated
Coalescing into shallower reality

Despite my youth, pain cripples me to geriatric apathy
General interest long gone, death has become the single concern
A welcome embrace, a welcome friend
Tardiness is expected, as well as encouraged

Release me from these eternally shrinking walls
Allow the peons to continue their superficial pursuits
Never meshing well into the fold, I yearn simply for permanent isolation
There is not enough joy to justify the agony that life forever guarantees me

Nihilism and anger, desires for maniacal retribution, the only feelings I've ever known
Clouded over now by perpetual physical torment, my formerly hollow shell continues to exist without capacity for optimism
Yet without hate, there seems nothing left
Shall I forever be adrift?

Details | Lyric | |



I lie awake at night and I can’t fall asleep
Recounting every single detail
Of my life that’s passed and surely can’t be lived again
Mistakes I’ve made and never learned from
I stare in darkness at the pictures on the wall
Waiting for their stories to unfold before me
But I don’t see a thing, nor to hear a sound
Only the gears in my mind that keep turning

I watch the clock each night and track the time
As it changes and nothing within me moves
Dreamless again the ceiling always looks the same
And death, in my mind can’t be much worse
I need to change the way that I see the world
Or turning my back should I walk away
Too many people in life that I simply cannot face
With motives of self and no one else’s needs

I find again that the night is not a friend
But a wolf in sheepskin, staring, lurking
Waiting for the moment when it may pounce and feed
On every weakness that lives and breathes in me
Heart and soul and in every breath I take
I feel the torment tearing through me
And I can’t free myself from the awful truths
As I am lying here waiting for the death of me…

Details | Free verse | |

A Prayer For Healing

Do not let me be the demon I have created me to be.
I am the product of myself and my negativity.
I trust You.
I love You.
I thank You.
In Your name,
We pray,

Details | Free verse | |


Celestial thoughts possess my reality
And my knowing is lost.
Hours pursue and I do not contest.

Debates on possession, regretfully
Inform, numbness is expected
If the hours pursue,
Celestial thoughts will be required.

Symmetry obeys my minds rule,
Naive remarks, from an ancient soul.
Knowing is key, to the possession of dreams.

Heavy features do not expect for
Reality gives no benevolence,
To naive remarks spoken,
Symmetry of the mind,
Shall not be woken.

Details | Verse | |

Paper Chains

Soft and deep, dark eyes hiding secrets from yourself,
Making up your own realities, while Truth waits upon the shelf.
Haunting, it waits while the spiral ascends you,
Taking you higher and deeper into yourself;

Making up your realities, while Truth laughs upn the shelf.
I watch; my power beside me.  Listening, there's nothing I can do.
You choose the path, you choose the weapon, 
you choose the enemy.  He is you.

Our paths crossed and we loved each other
for an instant in the eternity of our time.
We choose the path, we choose the weapon,
I choose my enemy.  You are mine.

Now our time is short and the painful day is ending;
An affair with Power that seems never spent.
I thought you were the supreme answer to loving,
And our jaded love was the main event.

But love no longer blinds me.

I can look beyond your soft, dark eyes into the place
You hide your thoughtless lies.
You're keeping secrets from yourself.
Making up your own realities, while Truth yawns upon the shelf.

Emerged in your desire for freedom,
Why are you so blind to the shackles encircling your feet?
Freedom means responsibility, too, and taking risks.
Like love, it's bitter-sweet.

It means being free to try again when all else has failed.
In peace, you are free to hold out your softer hand 
Unabashed to the reasons why you faltered, 
Releasing pain and anger in order to understand.

You could rest your head upon my shoulder
Or, you are free to stand and leave.
I can tell you, but you'll never believe it:
You can entrust your heart, or retrieve it.

You think freedom means being able to run away
And never having to explain to me why
You have the right to break my heart,
Leaving me crumbled and alone to cry.

Just remember Freedom encases your love in
Shackles like so many colorful paper chains,
Only to be broken at the stroke of your hand.
Clutch it too hard and it slips away like sand.

But love no longer blinds me.

I now know the greatest love is for my own Self.
and Truth smiles and applauds amidst the dust upon the shelf. 

Details | Cowboy | |

Moccasin Moon

It slides softly in the night sky,
That pale moccasin of the moon—
It lights up a snow-bleached prairie—
Whispering summer comes too soon.

We trace the trail of coyotes—
Avoid the dark dens of the bear—
The full light of your white footprint
Lures us now to your fatal lair.

Oh, we chant into the black dome
Of all the things that used to be—
There’s no more Indian summer—
Long gone are Cree and Cherokee.

Yet, still the silky stealthy tread
Brings back images bright and keen—
Of lost Native Americans
Where so few are now seldom seen.

But moons do not let us forget
All the wild blood shed on both sides—
As we trace steps of moccasins
To where the dark of the moon hides.

Yes, it walks gently in tall sky,
That faint moccasin of new moon—
So gently it illuminates
As we dance mutely to its tune.

Details | Free verse | |

For a Moment

For a moment, I believed I even allowed myself to breathe. . . To smile upon you in all that was said and done For a moment, you were there And a simple thought made me beam I was there looking you in the eye it seemed For a moment, doubt swept under my feet Threatening to bring me to the ground But your words pulled me up by the string For a heavy moment, I realized Just how far you are from me Too far to be close—to far to allow that smile And for another sad, long moment, I sit here in awe-struck despair Wondering why the smile was ever there

Details | Bio | |

Rage Fueled Monster

Anger rises like bile in my throat
It’s burning through my veins, squeezing my heart
A smile plays on your lips as you gloat
I must stop before I rip you apart

Sweet ecstasy of the rage controls me
It seeps in my mind, I tear through my skin
Smile gone, you see me, your worst enemy
Do not bother running, you will not win

The forbidden taste of fury so sweet
Again I warn you don’t bother running
You my prey are in for a special treat
You are fast but I am still more cunning

You’re no match for my monstrous bulk
Hear me roar, for i'm the untamed Silverstorm

Details | Free verse | |

The Night Circus

After dark I feel 
The need to be awake 
In the forbidden world
The world that shows
Me my mirror
Of hope, despair, glory
A true story

After dark civilization goes to bed
Primitiveness reigns away
The ugly looks beautiful
And all are in unison 
Riches and rags
Virgin to whore
We all go through
The same door

After dark the sun retires
The moon prevails
With a thousand blind eyes
One sees it all
One hears it all 

After dark sounds sound
The dark darkness

After dark emptiness befriends 
Intoxicating booze
Lighter spirit
Gently infused

Bottled up emotions
The bottle helps …
To confess

Details | Haiku | |

Dark Sea Oats

Thru the dark sea oats
Golden sunrise on dark sea
Waters churns from storm

Details | Haiku | |

Haiku's that I wrote while I was away. Hope you enjoy.

#haiku I imprint my heart . a fingerprint of my soul . the clay of your eyes #poem 

#haiku The delicate sound . a star makes when it twinkles . galaxy's whisper #poem 

#haiku I hear clear voices . resonating to my ears . my heart's fantasy #poem 

#haiku The shades of night fell . as curtains of the opera . Ending the act: day #poem 

#haiku Delicate detail . overlaying skeleton . disguising structure #poem 

#haiku Railroads of my thoughts . Locomotion of pulses . One to another 

#haiku Speakled mist in air . slowmotion movement between . scene to scene of town 

#haiku Nautical daydreams . her dress fluttering like sails . anchored to my heart 

#haiku Orange glow on ceiling . fades a dark eternity . these curious shades 

#haiku Yesterday's winter . a memory frozen for . tomorrows summer 

#haiku My heart is a time-machine . broken: out of order . doomed to the present 

If I was a fly, I would fly as high as I could, then just fall to the ground sniff 

asphalt glistens new . sparkling in the lamp-light . clean glaze of clear ice #haiku #weblit 

Let me tattoo her . heart and name onto my soul . to take on death's wings. #haiku #weblit 

Don't devour my words . try to reassemble my eyes . just listen to what's there #haiku 

Adolescence leaves . individuality . a thing of the past #haiku #poem #poetry #weblit 

Water containing . starlight sprinkles from heaven . colors of cosmos #haiku #writing 
#writer #art 

If I could delete . All of the sins from my heart . What knowledge would go #haiku #poetry 
#weblit #lit 

A shot through the dark . a single shooting star leaves . memories of then #haiku #poetry 
#weblit #lit #literature #poems #poem #writing

Details | Lyric | |

Hey Bartender

Written 2010

Flashing lights and sounds roll by
Hear the sound of muffled sighs
Sullen words cannot express
Just confess, and lift it off your chest
Told the priest would hear your cries
If you don't feed him blatent lies

Oh he's your only friend 
But he don't want to hear your sins
He's off doing his own thing
But it's far from priestly things
Oh he wont look in your direction
Let alone show you affection
Even when he hears your plea,
"Hey bartender please!"
Gone are all your hopes and dreams
All you ever sought to be
Heard from all across the room
Are many empty pleas,
"Oh won't you pity me?"

You can close your eyes and count to 10
Again and again
But he wont come back to help his fellow men
He was your only friend, but he left you all alone
To wallow in your sin
He failed to listen to your prayer
Now your lost in dark dispair

You can hide behind your cries
But he'll see into your eyes
Until the time you leave his bar
And wobble to your car

Details | Dramatic Verse | |

The Art of Darkness

When you offer up your heart and soul
and pour yourself into a relationship
only to have it spat back into your face
and your heart ripped out and trampled under foot
right before your own eyes

and when you attempt any kind of damage limitation
to be laughed at almost hysterically
leaving you to hide in a dark corner
with the tears streaming down your face
feeling every raw nerve being scraped again and again

and yet you go on hoping for better
optimistically hoping for sunrise
when in reality there is only the night and darkness
the darkness of her nasty mouth and wicked laugh

in it all there is one glimmer of light,
the children you made are beautiful and bright
and young as they are they can see the truth

as you retreat further you feel it stir
deep inside it fights back
your spirit, that wonderful human thing
it’ still there unbroken, just a little bent

so you escape into your art
and pour into it your heart
but art has a dark side too
and it can bite you opening up the wounds
making you raw once again

facing the darkness from within your light
and so yet again you retreat into the night

...............deeper and DEEPER into Darkness

Details | Light Poetry | |


In the dark
Beyond the reach of light
When the day is clothed in black cover
And color, height and size exit the stage
When all, without exception is levered
By the highest commonest decimal of nudity
Devoid of illusion of furs and feathers
Tempting the eyes of shamefulness and shamelessness
In dead dark night nakedness
We return to beings called human
United with the effervescent rhythms of nature
A turn, and back behind the beginning, we are
Turning the time to timeless Eden
Stripped of all trappings and wrappings
Of façade and fallacy of fashion;
Vile fame and vain fortune
Base beauty of clothed eyes
We become knotted with the elements
Stark naked as we once were
When nude culture was the couture
In the stark dark night
We stand naked and true
Naked; pristine, pure and proud

Details | Lyric | |

The Only One






Details | Free verse | |

The Fire

You blaze so brightly, I’m afraid
It’s been dark here for so long
If I stray too far I’ll lose the light
If I stand too close I’ll be consumed
but I need the fire, it brings me to life. 

Your worry vibrates through your smile
and I wonder why I’m here again,
we linger in our favorite place a while
drinking cheap Chianti and Heineken
I’ll lose the light if I stray too far.

We talk about our days and nights
(Does she taste me when you kiss her?)
I sip my wine and pick my fights
As our worlds begin to blur
I’m too close and beginning to burn.

All the fun’s been had, I’ll never understand
what you still want from me,
Yet I wait shamefully for your command
filled equally with desire and misery
You blaze so brightly I’m helplessly drawn.

I’ve read that love is not enough
but reality and Serif font can never measure up.
You tell me that I think too much
my heart demands that my mind shut up.
because I need your fire to bring me to life.

A tiny spark that smolders still,
quiet glow of a former crackling glory
its embers flicker with every wind 
that can gently flame or roughly snuff.
I’m sorry to leave like this but I’ve just realized
it’s been dark here long enough.

Details | Free verse | |

My Final Choice

Its so dark and cold here. 
Nothingness seeps in to my soul 
I cry silently into the night sky, 
praying for absolution,
ready for redemption of my crimes.

Night forces spread out across the land. 
Thick and heavy it consumes everything
The stars above sparkle, 
then go dark and become hollow. 
All lights are now gone.

 But in the distance a ray of hope shines.
The darkness creeps closer.
Threatening to overtake one more thing
on a quest for absolute power and control.

For the first time,
I feel a sense of rallying deep in my soul, 
My inner spirit waking up regaining control
I am drawn to the growing bright light 

I can see the battle playing out before me 
Light against dark 
A war that has gone for eternity 
Now its time for the absolution I prayed for .
I just have to make my final choice 

Do I run towards the light ?
Or do I let the darkness consume me ?

Details | I do not know? | |

I am not Jesus

What was up with all that *****with the keys?
The weed?

The transfer of seed?

-Not unlike me

I come into a tree
And randomly free myself of my street

I come up on a beat 
And leak out my literal leaf

And ache at the pillory awaiting the generation of me

I don’t want nothin’ bad to happen
But what does one trigger hand have in battle?

I would rather the peace be kept
And my life be given instead

I would rather a dead man be kept
Than his resurrection come once again

I would hate heaven to see me
When I curse at people who don’t see me

I would adapt to anothers kin
If he didn’t feel the need to always resurrect them…

Details | Free verse | |


I often question if I can feel the ecstasy I used to know,
that old familiar rush that seeps through my skin.
Do I have to swallow those little numbers
(one through eight)
to make myself whole?
Only then do I fail to differentiate the warmth of my skin from the atmosphere.
And my heart pounds like a change in gravity.
My skin starts to inhale and a tidal wave crashes into my senses-
I’m disoriented and dazed and fulfilled momentarily,
so I’m lost in a cycle,
counting by eights.

Details | Lyric | |

Forty Six and Two is Descending

A time of pain
Lost in your mind
Playing games
The will of hers
Is strong like his
Soothing like furs
The weakest wills
Without domination
Or scepters gaze
No one will beat sin
Or get past this phase

The few have seen it
The few do know
Majority fails
While shadows glow

Walking the path
Is older now
Then gliding through it
Past Satan’s bow
No one can tell you
What lies past the way
So take back the two 
And conquer those who stay

Though few have seen it
Not many do know
That when majority fails
Our shadows will glow

Pick up the ashes
Retrieve lost tears
Stand up beside us
Let go of your fears
No more wandering
Alone in ourselves
Take back what was once yours
From a life you once dwelled

Details | Light Poetry | |

Bullying ruin lives

Every day in school
They would pick on him
And threaten to kill his mom
If he reported them

The constant abuse 
And the physical attacks
For months he took it
And the teachers all turn their backs

The shame and humiliation
His peace of mind and sanity is gone
The hurt in his heart 
While the girl he likes helplessly looks on

The frustrations of the parents
Seeing their only child health decline
And the teachers who turn a blind eye
Telling them everything in school is fine

The attempt of suicide one night
When the father saw him with knife
Asking if he will go to heaven or hell
If he takes his own life

The tear of the kidney
For the force of the kicks and blows
The lost of appetite and weight
The suffering only he alone knows

But he did open his mind he said
I can’t got through another year like this
And when they were arrested then many
Told the press what they had witness

Today he is trying to get back his life
But his road is pave with bad memories
And sometimes he almost reaches the end
And then get scared of the shadows of the trees

Then he is right back where he started
And then he has to start again with frustration
Sometime lashing out at his parents and family
Trying to get some much need attention

Looking at him very quite sitting alone
Wondering what’s going on in his poor mind
And wishing to that one day god will
Bring him the peace he so much wants to find

He is a fighter and his will are very strong
Yes today he is along way from there
And I know that eventuality the time will come
His smile will return that has now disappear

The war must be over for now
But every day he has a battle to face
But in the end he will be victorious
And get back his life that has been misplace

So many kids has and are being bulled
And some are talking their own lives
For when you feel all hope is gone
Then it’s very hard to survive

They are sick and tired of the abuse,
and they little minds fought so hard, so very long,
And was just couldn’t make it
through the pain, and stayed strong.

I wish all students will look after the weak
The ones who are very quite and shy
And if the teachers and students do this
Then so many of our children will not have to die

Details | Free verse | |

play, pause

i’m splitting at the seams.


one arm gently pulls, the other yanks-


never a moment of silent bliss,

i bite my lip until crimson liquid seeps out the corners of my mouth

and drips

staining my peplum top.

distant memories creep into my mind to warn of the shame i’ll find

in this game of hide-and-seek

if i let them see that my smile isn’t real

and my blood prefers to stay in my veins.

So I don’t stop.

I move my lips into position

and wipe the blood from my chin.

And press ‘play’ on the cassette tape that reads:

"of course I’m happy",

because I can’t form those words myself.

Details | Prose | |

While she slept

I’ve forgotten what it’s like to have someone in my bed for more than a few hours at a time but since you were too drunk to drive, I let you stay the night. Your soft frame caroused around my pillow top mattress like a dog walking itself in circles, looking for the perfect place to take a ****. I was starting to sober up, prior hours becoming more transparent in hindsight. I couldn’t sleep. You finally settled and began to softly agitate my neck with deep, and steady breaths. I rose, checked my wallet and put it my gun’s lock box. The steel tasted like blood; somehow soothing. We were there together like that for what seemed like an hour, at the very least, totally indifferent to one another, still sweating from what was actually a pretty spectacular session of love making. Unfortunately once again, I was stuck with myself. Your body, for a while, helped me escape. Being inside something so perfect, so complete and full of grace made me feel alive again. And then I came; for those few, brilliant moments, the lines between life and death were blurred. Nothing mattered. The same thought went through my mind as my teeth sat upon the unforgiving certainty of the effect of pulling the three pound trigger cradled by my forefinger. And then you sighed. It sounded like poetry. The calm of your dream state swam through my bones and curled up, just like that dog and laid still in my rib cage. I sat the gun down and shook the blur loose. I could feel the world spin in that moment, I could feel the constancy. I was more comfortable with it, life. I didn’t think about you leaving when the sun rose, or sneaking out so I didn’t have to have an awkward morning. I just laid there, and thought about what sort of dream would make an Angel sigh. 

-James Kelley 2014, All rights reserved.

Details | Couplet | |

love starved

If love is a hunger.Then my heart is 
empty.The pains run deeper then 
the pacific ocean floor.So many 
lovers my heart feels like a revolving 
door.I ask my mother to feed me 
cause i    hunger for her love .She 
gave me the left over scraps from 
my sisters and brother.barely 
enough to stop the pain.I ask my 
father to feed me and he only feeds 
my mother ,and when he 
remembers that I have no love he 
says hes fresh out.I asked my 
husband to  feed me .But he cant 
even make food.He gives me a 
dinner mint of lust .It disappears as 
soon  as it touches my 
lips.Countless lovers taking from an 
already starved heart. The inner 
parts of my heart consumed by the 
love given but never received.My 
heart is just and empty hollow lining 
.So empty the hunger pains can 
never be felt again.

Details | Free verse | |

The White Room

Blinding and bright: fluorescent light;
It makes the eyes water and sting,
And deafening silence drums on my ears, making them dial and ring.
Or am I the only one here who thinks these ridiculous things?

That the government fears all the truths that I hear;
That I can taste the vice of the proud,
And the ground underfoot is not really there
Because my head's high up in the clouds?

Or that the frigid fan's blow turns wall-pads to snow
And freeze me in place when I touch 
The beds made of stone that bruise all my bones;
That's why I don't like it here much. 

(Yet I have to stay, 'cause I don't have a say
With all the insurance and such).

But no one will listen; no one understands
Not a man or a woman dares wonder
If the ravings of a single madman
Could put the whole sane world under.

For who wants to ponder the weird and the strange;
Who wants to leave what seems true?
No one seeks the thoughts of the deranged
Though here the deranged are sane, too.

Are the nurses in blue imprisoned like us
With their expressions etched in stone?
How long has it been since they ever smiled
Or got to go rest in their homes?

(I'd call their houses to find out the answer,
But I'm not allowed near the phone).

It is hard to love what it unloved;
Impossible to see like the blind,
But being strapped tight in this room of white
Makes me think I've not lost my mind.

Could it be those authorities who chose
To trap me here in this prison,
Unable to see as clearly as me;
Is it they who have lost their vision?

So I consider as I wait for freedom,
For someday, Insanity will get them.

Details | Rhyme | |

Sound of Silence

Expectant feel In dark of night Lips squeezed to seal “gainst words held tight Pregnant silence mayhaps born of fear No words or whispers Caress one’s ear Black glove of velvet Holds tight the hush Of careless words In callous crush Peace hides deep In quiet’s keep Yet shares it’s lair With fear Silence…ominous… Peaceful, deep Sparce…voluminous Carbon black in mystery steeped Creature of comfort? “thing” to fear? What tis this “silence” That we e’er need to hear? Tis composed of stardust Of dark matter deep That cradles our trust in Quiescent quest of sleep

Details | Cowboy | |

Border's End

I did not drive the roan that day,
Just saddled up my old dark bay,
To check out fences far afield
And breathe in life with all its yield.

Near border’s end I came upon
A fresh, dead cow down by the pond.
I wondered why it had died here
With water and spring grass so near.

I spurred my horse and reined away
But something said that I should stay—
I creaked down from my saddle’s reach
And saw the cow had died in breech.

I knew they should be buried soon,
By light of day or dark of moon. 
I left them there, that calf and cow
And rode back home in thought somehow.

I had forgot that scene of death
Till summer quickly took my breath
And once again I passed that shell
Of twisted skin and faded smell.

The worms had done their work it seems 
On frenzied flesh and faltered dreams.
Yet, still I stared like at a grave—
Thought how we took but seldom gave.

Then autumn came and tinted trees
With colors each low creature sees.
So on my horse I sought them out,
To answer what this life’s about.  

A mute Madonna—sticks of bone,
Still nestled there so all alone.
We live and die, the season’s dawn,
We’re all breech born before we’re gone.

In winter’s wind the world turns cold
As cow and calf and man grow old.
Yet, now there’s no sinew or hide 
To hint of life or what’s inside.

Death’s passion passed and so did I
To pay respects and say goodbye.
For man and beast all die as kin—
I will not ride this trail again.


Details | Free verse | |

In A State of Amnesia Falling Into Fantasia

Your love, like amnesia it made me forget all the dark forces against me they tortured me relentless then you put me into amnesia from the problems, hope came in the foresight of your prowess and the light emanating from your face what seems calm on the surface is often roaring within screaming, hair crazy like I'm the demon's descendant only strong feelings can push out the weak and those skeletons surface, hurt us and repeat so no ones around and I learn to hate me and no Love to be found because it gave me a profound amnesia. waking prematurely every other time I sleep seeking sanctuary why cant I be at peace? fill up a void come into my world exposed to be touched pay no mind I'm at home when the pain seems too much shut it off like a light now i'm all into peace a presence around me a love like amnesia I'm falling into fantasia calm as can be worries drift away forget how hurt I am for one meaningful day no I'm not the devil but I know who he is he once came to visit and make my soul his as a dark ball inside me consumes me at times i keep inching forward toward the many facets of mind knowing not showing much at all down in the sunrise revived by the fall a natural course of a star entering destruction like lotus flowers in bloom under a fog covered moon in the cold autumn wind healing old scars within practice the old magik into a new growing skill will it be enough the day which stands still worth fighting for.

Details | Rhyme | |


The fleeting shadow 
Lurks in the dark murky meadows
It watches in the distance
At the walking figure 
Of a lonely fellow
The young fellow hinds his steps
As he smells the putrid odor
Of ancient death
As old as the vindictive serpent
He is the vagrant dead one
It was born in the Land 
Between Rivers
It peers into the young fellow’s soul
And makes his spine quiver
But the fellow knows of the ether
And it’s Divine Creator
He has studied the sacred writings
Knows of the Almighty Power
That can strike you down like lightning
He knows of a heavenly brimstone fire
That consumes all evil
Of those that speak with evil tongues
The Breath of Life
Will abandon their lungs
The young fellow casts his head down
And whispers a prayer
He had learnt form the great scriptures
A majestic angel appears 
Carrying a bejeweled scepter
And walks beside the lonely fellow
As he walks out of the dark murky meadows
The lurking shadow flees
At the sight of the angel’s 
Golden halo

Details | Free verse | |

Blades of Apathy

Memories scarcely recollected
as if the frail pictures hold traces of
shame—no, not shame—
a contemptuous emotion strung
upon such intruding truths,
basking and waiting
for words to record its frumpy 
existence—gone . . .

There is a fear lurking where
honesty resides, as blades
of apathy slash away at the edges
of time—making way for 
distant sadness. . .and a cool blur of

-May 30, 2014-

Details | I do not know? | |

Motor head boy

Intact I am math, 
but in a blast I run fast

...Somewhere above the tree line-
I am seen as fine, 
but inside I am tried...

Weather doesn't help locate a song-
So I hop on a motorcycle to get gone...

I soon crash into a nearby tree, 
and lay on the ground for weeks…

The sooner I come home-
the lesser I learn how to grow

And its never anything but my last breathe of shine that I felt my teeth grind-
****ing the enemy
...the way of the blind

Organic and prime, 
my weaknesses don't show-
so I am fine...

And while feeling fine-
in an interesting wine, 
I smell the pine-
aching within me-
raking at my earliest pillory

So I walk on pleased-
get paid, 
and then go spend all my pees

...With this withering game of time, 
I get hexed to know some of mine

But I soon stop, 
eager to drop, 
1,2,3, and then four…

Four strips, One token, 
and two years unspoken

Where I turn and spin in the door

A splended welcome to adore! 

What shores have washed away from these pores! 

What course I have taken to learn how to adore!

But there is a land I lived in alive
but it just wasn't my find, 
I was there, 
but it wasn't my mind...

I wish I could scream! 

Feel mean! 

Go away unnoticed! 

Then re-arrive climbing in trees! 

Birds eat the bees,
lizards the breeze

But character never breeds 

Its gotta be seen-
understood, spoken and then dreamed
before you wake to it-
just like she made ya do it-
and you jerked yourself through it

Started ta loosin' it,
got loaded,
and became a rude influence

Details | Senryu | |

Eternal Cycle

Midnight has fallen,
Fated to be overrun
By bright, sunlit skies.

But Dawn also breaks;
And Daylight is forced to fade,
So Night might rise.

Eternal cycle
Unbroken for centuries,
Until the sun dies.

Details | Blank verse | |

From Abor to Columbus

Gods of my Birthwaters
I carry your heart with me (I carry it in
my soul) I am never without it (anywhere
I go you go with me) and whatever are my thoughts 
(you are in the thoughts)

Gods of my Birthplace
I have no life (you are my life) 
I have no future (for you are 
my future) and I have no dream of my own 
(for you are in every dream)

where can I go 
without you (can the tiger deny itself 
the spots in its skin)
I carry the birthmark
of the tiger 

but here is the deepest sorrow 
the darkness I carry in my waywardness
stranded at crossroads away from Home 
(and this is the root of the problem) I’m in love 
with macaroni-n-cheese 
(and I’m told that’s civilization
away from yam puddings we knew at Home) and we
are forced to drink stinging grief and smile calmly

I have taken a new name (and it wrung my hands
and killed my memory of Home) and turn my soul 
to a stone and under the dark veil (I have to learn to live again) 

it’s the he-goat that learns something 
when it loses an ear
on the long running highways 
of blues

how can I forget to pay my debts
to ancestral Birthwaters
when many stones are thrown
at my last smile and the pit 
has become my solitary mast 
at the bay of the Master Termite

it is the herring that said
homebound is the last resort of the maimed goat 
maybe, when the northern breeze comes 
I’ll take the deep dive Homeward to where 
the broods eat grains of sorghum from scuffed 
pages of the mother’s palm and the sun’s last rays 
bring joy to dying lips 

walking this long dark road
dancing to nowhere to call Home
your tattoos on my soul shatter my dreams
and here I sit holding to an albatross 
searching through echoes 
of yesterdays for a bright eye
to see through footprints of frozen tears 

in this twilight zone
I gather in the silence
the will to sail on before the sun 
is gone from silence
and the lighthouse eaten by the storm

Details | Rhyme | |

In the Clouds

So much to live for
Hearts touched
And explored

Life is but a double-edged sword

Can we all reach an accord
Any time soon
Since we can't afford
To meet our impending doom

Why do we assume
The roles that consume
Our lives are presumed

Innocent? Yet never
Proven guilty
It's for the better
To polish what is filthy

Wishful thinking
Blissful preaching

Falls upon deaf ears

Sick to the tears
With all of these fears

Eating us alive
So, we no longer thrive

The will to strive
Continues to drive

Truly feel alive
And you will finally arrive

To your final resting place

Death comes with grace
And we must all face
The devil's trace

In the end,
It all feels the same.

Details | Free verse | |

never mirror marriage unrequited unplenty

Can u take boy me for what I am or do u need to fabricate an ego estrogen entity 
to fit yr fake *******. forum in twat time present and id absent intensity. Do tell howwhatwhatwherewhywhichwatkindhowmanywhose as I am of a different time place evo endeavor, rich in poor so u can take alternative advantage cause u feel infosexsuperior to me mine naked nill sense
with yr ****egg enhancedenvy and frivolous faulted agressive female fervunt. Tame the  delerious diametric dimensions aplenty. Pushed pussy pleasure and feel femimine fornunicatious prowess for yr undiscovered undenying  sadistic only offspring ongoince ocular pursuance negating all elses
in your precocious pretensious postal only psuedo friends that it can't be donated done
in an emoeffort with legs open charmed to a prone proficient practice promise
with giving gonad governance of which I bought into with a Florida filtered fragrance  forgiveness favoring your internal id odd ego conveance only inclination wishwashing countercontrol conscious cerebral crap.
to a wilfull wonderous female who was, as the saying goes,  
willing to give all of herself all to all of me, unbeknowingst to me that it was all a 

post pisces ruse  cancercase in point. pretensious pandering to a boy from Ohio to 
a pussimic promise that reads all to well and
I will liveloveu in always regard less of societal dis regar retard retro renderings; given real or predisposed, contrivent, or nonminent in neutral nature. I givegavegiven up my low life to serve u only u in spite of me and your upper crust crest to be u like u or one 
of u and to lovelittle unbeknowingst a latitude of 30 plus piss yrs and 3 glorious sons later gifted to u       I have only all un's for which to fathershow un     fornicatingly failed in every, according to u, every forgone fatherly catagory. Tminus and 8 yrs asa monk. Tell me who is the unGonad unpotential KING of living oin a monster mommo mode of ugly unforgiveness, un understandings of undeniable undertakings, make all all things admirable admissible,  yet received all doings undoing. When all of ones self is totaly given to a cause and mutual ego emotion is grounded in guilt laden lunicacy, all is love lost. Individual identity cannot exist withou self sense; so all that is left is  a ghost dead, 
showing no male prowess, nonexistenant, nothing, neverness in being. 
 If I were King with 3 great sons I would be a *****Prince, a Gonad God, a Semen Sentinel. Long live me? (No Queen intended.)

Details | Lyric | |

Alchemical Summoner

An alchemist in history’s tome
My past a tale of creating my own
My energy spent on the pain
I conjured forth from living in shame

A creature came, riddled with hate
The sun would burn his delicate face
I summoned him from darkest depths
A symbol of the loss that I kept

He stared at me, all smiles and rage
Creeping through the shadows at day
At night we spoke in whispered tones
The death I sought had invaded my home

The world I feared no longer held weight
When compared to this monster’s hate
He speaks his mind and I come undone
His twisted plans could bury the sun

He knew so well, the pain that I’d seen
He multiplied each loss ‘til I screamed
But still I learned, and I was in charge
Despite his tricks and these alchemical scars

Now here I am, standing in love
For all his hate, he still holds me up
In quiet pause I learned his name
In knowing truth, our demons are tamed

Details | Free verse | |


I used to think the night swallowed us, 
Took away our pain, and spat us out again
Whole, mended like a darned sock.
I used to say, go and rest now.
You’ll feel better in the morning, I promise.
Now, I keep repeating this contraction and expansion,
In, out. This dense fog, the light is distilled awfully.
I cannot lift my weary limbs, singed eyeholes protruding
From teary eyes, I shrink back to nothing. 

Details | Light Poetry | |

My final goodbye

What’s the purpose of living?
When everyday I’m losing my life
Trying to live without a heart
Has become impossible to survive

I awake and just sit on my bed
Don’t have the will to face the day
I try to go on without her
But I can’t keep hurting this way

I try my best, I really try my best
But it is much harder than it seems
Why would I want to keep this life?
Knowing the disaster it has been

The pain of my heart ache
I have carried for so long
And I just can’t carry it no more
I’m tired of being strong

Maybe dying is the only way out
From this cruel, cruel world
And all my misery will go away
When they cover me in the hole

So as I get ready now to quit my life
I’m am totally aware of what I’m about to do
So if any on says that I was crazy
That will be just speculations and not true

Many claims to know the power of love
And the things love can make you do
And those are the ones who will understand
The hell my life was going through

Yes I love her more than my life it self
I guess god said it was not meant to be
And he took me out of her heart
But leave a life time of misery for me

So I will go to sleep now
And pray not to wake tomorrow
And that my life will quietly go
To put and end to my sorrow

And as I contemplate how to end it
I write this with tears in my eyes
I have suffer for to long
Hiding behind a fake disguise

And as sure as the morning will come
And the stars will be in the sky
My life has come to the end
So this is my final goodbye

Details | Bio | |

My Sweet Savior

I felt so rejected, alone and sad
like an abandoned puppy left to wander a street
it was then that I realized, that my life was real bad
so I disowned every challenge I happened to meet
I just gave up on trying to make others happy
so I fell in a hole that was too deep to climb
I sure didn't care if others felt crappy
people got on my nerves for such a long time
'til that day I saw someone who changed my ways
it was someone who I knew and liked so much
but the way that I felt when my eyes met her gaze
I forgot all my troubles, my sorrows and such
she helped pull me out of that hellish, dark hole
I got all my thoughts back on track and my heart set in place
she filled up this feeling, one that never felt full
she got rid of my hatred, which I’ll never re-trace
it was then that I noticed, how my life would get better
she became my sweet savior, a gift from above
my life would be nothing, had I never met her
I’m glad that I have someone now that I love.

 Dedicated to my Sweet Michaela,  who shattered the darkness around me.

Details | Prose Poetry | |

Lost Confessions

Lost between Heaven and Hell, battlements of my spirit and mind, Raptures me into 
the new day, but delivers me in the darkness of night. I argue within my mind, that 
shall wither it blind, randomly I search for the meaning that enhances the light. I 
wander through the ailment that haunts me so. Small amounts of peace keep me 
driving onward, though I feel no glow. In-between both I am haunted with one 
sight, Glimpse of the dream I hold so dear, with massive amounts of fear, my 
menacing fantasy keeps me on my fight. Each week that passes seems as everyone 
that fell before.
My soul knows my end is of a different kind, knowing the sin that I carry each night 
and the penance that I must endure. My destiny is not what I see, But is what I 
deeply ignore. Lost between Heaven and Hell, My soul cannot sell, this torment, I 
speak is a different form I break, Not just any ordinary sin, I have no-where to begin.
No end to reach, my darkness seeks light, though there is no realization to teach. I 
am haunted by the past that lonely night that seizes, though it pleases me ,but no 
other can live in the desire that I speak here and now, Others have traveled this 
road without any dark temptation, though I would lose all interpretation, with great 
litigation. Lost now and forever my dream, forgotten almost it may seem. Distant 
calls engorge my thoughts, memories chase my spirit, and lust envelops my soul, 
into the realm betwixt Heaven and Hell. My dream I shall bury, my destiny, I shall 
marry within my mind and spirit. These darkened nights shall grab the bright days 
down into the mishap of grace. I will council each cheerful day and plant a smile on 
my face. However, the agony shall drive my heart to a stainless hollowness of 
discomfort my continued dream shall live on and inhabit this shell. This shell 
someday shall wither away; there will be nothing left to tell.

Written for

Sponsor Catie Lindsey 
Contest Name Dark Prose 

Details | Free verse | |

i found you in a memory

my logic is circles
fragmented thoughts become rounder
french painters judge your symbolic statement
you freely seek God
but deliver us temptation you request
interpretation is healthy, even pleasurable
attraction leads you from tragedy
to where you start reclaiming super powers
you say adolescence and feel off-limits
your innocence possessed wild love
songs of nature you heard
so vividly intense
dreams fooled by social masks
darkness is to drink quietly
blackness and bright lights are a mystery of unknowns
empty silence can recharge you
question the impressionist
evaluation is a big old mess
pursue inspiration by hunting goals
urban dictionary is absolutely genuine
sins are just voyages across
hundreds of remote landscapes
kiss those who helped you
and compose crazy love letters
paradise is a vulgar vision 
for those who fish in perspective
fate can’t fix the big old mess

Details | Ballad | |

The Vision

The fire was out, the flame was gone
But one small shaft of sun yet shone
And that one shaft did make a hole
In that dark dungeon of my soul
I saw it as it broke that crust
And cast into the air was dust
Into that hole my hand did thrust
And deep inside that hole I found
The rarest treasure all around
A butterfly that spoke one sound
And "love" it said, then it was bound
Into the air and off it went
As if it were from heaven sent
The wind picked up, with newfound hope
My dungeon fell away to smoke
I found myself then in a meadow
And that was when I saw her shadow
Her silhouette was beautious fair
And blowing in the wind, her hair
Was moving with such perfect grace
It was then that I saw her face
It was the most enchanting thing
I'd ever seen. But then the ring
Did catch my eye. On her finger there,
A golden band with fiery flair.
But then and there she heaved a sigh
So fraught with woe, she began to cry
But my dark face must have caught her eye
For when she simply turned around
My heart began to leap and bound
And then I caught sight of her name
But NO! she couldn't be the same
As the other person that I knew
Of that same name, could it be true?
Her name was carved there in a tree
So that anyone who wished to see
Would simply look and know 'twas she.
Her hair was darker than before
But her beauty was all there. And sore
Was I to see her go with wind
That did begin to blow. So pinned
Against a wall behind me there
Forlorn with loss then I did dare
To scream into the wind with pain
Her one eternal lovely name

Details | Free verse | |

Love's Lies

Like a warm knife through the butter of the soul, 
The insect that scratches the ear drums as we watch love's lies lay eggs of waste
Till they're in the mouth of your mirror's reflection of fear
least someone should lie themselves into a care of this placebo of lust.
 Till eyes turn against nature to the arid desert of exhaust
the emotional orgy to the mental climax of the unreal.
Descriptions of the void so vivid stirs a chuckle refusing to be hydrated with tears
Cynical text mid composition stirs the stomachs dragons....sighs
O how love's lies have caught us.

Details | Rhyme | |

The Wonder of You

Seeing through the eyes of the misfit and lonely Hearts explode from the fear of it all Propelled by failure I shake with fright Wondering where will my head lie tonight? Under the clay or on top of your thighs? In a cold shallow grave our spirits arise Insides rot with the test of ones heart Craving and hunger, what kept us apart? Broken down by cancer's seclusion Casting out love born free of illusion Pounding out beats until the fat lady sings Leaving this place, forgoing his wings Who will cry for the suicide kings? Judge if you dare some comfort it brings Forget him we will, written off a lost cause Too close for comfort he’s broken our laws Who cries out for the suffering souls? Exhausted, defeated, never reaching their goals Torn apart by the presence of pride Their honor forsaken and ripped from their hide Pray for those who dream from above Their lives cut short by the absence of love Pray for me as I hold on to my last... Words for the wonder of you

Details | Rhyme | |

Suppression of Perception by Oppression

Complacency of the agencies
Who aimlessly remain racist

Tying up the little one's by the wrist
Why must the holy become rapists?

Is this what life should consist
As they pray up above
Yet, persist on never showing love?

So they stuff their faces
With a thousand disgraces
& sins, yet, the cheater never wins
Death is not the end, but where it all begins

Our future is the re-incarnation
Of our thoughts
The masses induce their own
Mental blood clots

Oh, i almost forgot
You're being watched by the robots
That will never rot
So, remember who fought

The ones under your nose like pans & pots
Under your feet like kitchen tiles
As they prowl like the Nile crocodiles
Yet, they're just vile pedophiles

Who can longer reconcile
All while
The bodies exponentially

Everyone eventually becomes senile
After 3 miles
Of endless aisles
In the petri dish & vials

Of our planet
That's composed of granite
Built by masons who
Banish the masses

Until they vanish the classes
With the whip that lashes
& never relaxes

Ashes to ashes...

Details | Free verse | |

This dxxn dam

My mental barriers crumble
as I sink deeper into this drunken delirium.
Thoughts of her rush in
like water through the cracks of a broken dam.
As the stone wall falls
and I am swept away by the flood,
I am sliced by debris and images of her smile.
I become submerged 
and the sounds of her laugh flow into my ears.
Beat to hell and soaked with sorrow, 
I finally wash ashore.

Details | ABC | |

Gone for Awhile

He's been gone for awhile, you can tell by his tracks If he sticks to that path, there will be no turning back Plunged into this journey without checking the maps A little further each time he drains this rig of it's gas Faster-n-faster once you pass the speed bumps Every missed opportunity, evident by the lumps The machine breaking down with the more fuel that it pumps Why stay grounded when you can soar with the jumps Life is a journey, there's no destination Rushing to get nowhere, and still we keep racing Life through this metal tunnel, steady just wasting Never seem to run out of fuel, lower gas prices were chasing I packed this vehicle with all the *****I swapped for my hope I gladly tear a new hole right after I tie off this rope I plundge away all my pain, so with life I can cope It's a runaway rig pack plum full of this dope

Details | Blank verse | |

Rolls November 9th 2012

Rolls of underappreciated, 
unwanted globs of wasted space lies beneath

Rolls of ugliness,
nostalgic fluff swimming underneath these

Rolls of hate,
dignity left to die under all these

More to love, more to hate
Even more to underappreciate
Lie to my face, kick my backside
Take from me until I can’t hide

Details | Free verse | |

True Reality

Why is it
I am always wrong?
I have always done?
Why is it
I am 
Never good enough
In your eyes
In challenging times?

How many times
Do I have to say
“I love You?”
What will it take
To convince
That mind 
Of yours?

What can I say
That will ease 
This jealousy
You feel towards me
When drinking 
Too much booze
Killing what brain cells
Are left
In that stubborn 
Head of yours!

How long 
Will it take
For you 
To believe in me?
For I know
I am a fool 
Staying here, with you!
Feeling desperate
Lost and lonely
Dreams squashed
Emotionally drained
When ‘we’ need to pull together
In union ship
To make 
This bond strong
Between us!

'Uniting as One’'

'Love Conquering All'

“So, I am told!”

I love you more
Than this
Arguing and fighting!
You refuse to understand
The love I have for you

My head 
Tells me to stay with you
My heart knows
I cannot!
I have asked you 
To be kind to me
I have asked
You to open up 

Your anger and rage
Continues growing
Out of control
Taking over
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde 
Burning bridges
Being ruthless
Out for the kill!

I need to break away!
I need to clear my head!
I need to experience
Love and longevity
True togetherness
The one’s I love!
My heart needs to experience
‘Healthy Love’
My heart deserves the best!
You now
Belong in my past
I am no longer the person
You once knew me, to be

Your insecurities
Your inner demons 
Far bigger
Than any of the love
You choose to acknowledge 
Feel from me!

You can believe this 
To be true
If nothing else!

“Love thy self”

Without personal gain
Your Primary Motive!
Know Love 
Be Love, in Action!

Be honest
Have empathy now
I cut these cords
Of emotional bondage
Bind us together 
True Love 
No longer 
Our foundation!

I stand on my own
I have learnt the lessons
You have come to teach
I now know
What love isn't!
“I thank you”
For showing me this!

My illusions of love
Blinding me
Colouring my experiences
Only what 
'I Wanted Us To Be'
‘True Reality’

Details | I do not know? | |

My Mind is a Maze

Can you feel this heat?
I'm smoldering beneath the ashes..
I feel so naked,still.
Cradling the misgiving and mistakes, I fear this is the cycle of insanity.
Free the chains and lift me from this water, so suffocating and debasing.

I want purged of my past, it is festering within me.
My body is a cell, my mind is the prisoner.
If I cared less, felt less, would I be less broken in the end?
Every calculated move,and yet I still don't add up in my mind.

Oh, these insecurities could eat me alive.
Instead, they rip and tear at my peace of mind, leaving me with only a frayed thread to dangle from.
How I unravel so perfectly and haphazardly.
I fear my need might just burn us down.
yet I feed the fire, I poke and I prod. I push and I doubt. 

I struggle to ignore this incessant clawing at my skin as I wait for sleep to come.
Can you lay here now with me and will me back to dreams?
Enveloped in your arms I feel safe, your heartbeat is my lullaby.

Details | Free verse | |

Embracing What Makes Me Human

The breath threatens to leave my lungs 
suffocated & smothered 
Blindness to this 
I hold it in my palm, open and forward 
He's scared of my fear, of my heart, of my all 
Darkness always follows light 
But he's scared 
Of my fear, of my heart, of my all 
Of what it will make him feel 
He leaves my questions unanswered 
          leaves me wanting, searching 
I feel lost and unseen for who I am, what I am 
What I hold inside 
Dancing in the chambers of my blood heart 
Skulking in the shadows of my mind

I can feel the heat of perfect truth probing at the deadwood of fragmented thought

He's scared to hear, to see, to feel
Why are you scared of my spirit? Because it pulls to the forefront of your mind all the things you lack, all the things you want, all the dark twisting violence that you hate but cannot turn away from in your own reflection

I have no fear anymore, I've surpassed the need to drink from this cup.. 
The need that's left gets chipped and scattered 
I crave my own! And why can't I have it? 
I hide it all away, to shelter you from my dark, to let you believe that I hold only joy at this domestic existence But there's scars and tissue and tendon that bleed, that demand aggression and evolution
 But he's scared, of my thought and my prayers, because I am unconventional, spiritually tall

And so unafraid of unleashing raw emotion 
So unafraid to embrace humans' need to feel hate along with love Aggression with gentle compassion

So unafraid to embrace all of my Self

Details | I do not know? | |


There are times in your life 
when you walk toward the light
by moving out of dark like any mystic

and before the light has gone
it will brand you with a song
a mark that say's your home is globalistic

and again before too long 
your works will soon belong
to the centre of the holocene ballistic

now, the cosmos is the carpet of our soul
the galaxy, the whole of me
the milky way the holocene
the gas that tore abundance from 
the plume of natures pelt

and before the light has gone
it will brand you with a song
a mark that say's your home is globalistic

there are times in your life 
when you walk toward the light
by moving out of dark like any mystic.



Details | Rhyme | |


Lost in the world ,
where i used to live,
standing near the sea,
on the cliff.
The heavy tides ,
slapping hard on rocks,
as if trying to make them stop,
make them stop from dying,
like they did,
stop them to fall off that grid,
in memory of those who jumped from that cliff,
surely they must have heard of that myth,
its just an odd domestic tiff.
In the mildest , greenest grove,
out of the calm of the coldest air,
inside the swollen and lonely cove,
i saw them standing there.
A little while later , with the clouds all grey,
i went on moving,
a little bit astray ,
the sun redeeming light,
as if punishing itself,
for what they have done,
for the matter of proving oneself.
Black silhouettes dancing from pole to pole,
i thank whatever god's maybe,
for my unconquerable soul,
beyond this place of heaven and hell,
wherever i may be at,
is a place which appears to be entirely well,
and the world beyond all that.
If i were gone in another life,
i'll knew that earth would spin,
i won't cry i'll just survive,
an escape from the world i'm in.
Shall i dwell in the dark forest?
or shall i seek the kingdom by the sea to see,
the reason i'm here,
is this the place to be.
Lost in the world,
where i used to play,
now i want to run,
it was like yesterday when i wanted to stay,
if i could see this glorious land once again,
which now prevails in my dream,
through the eyes astounded by beauty,
on the ending gleam.
Closing my eyes i am back from where i begun,
touching the seas and the mountains,
sublime like sun.

Details | Blank verse | |

Luciferia II-- The Damned

Run away Run Away No matter how Far You will never escape my dark hands of faith Wicked and Damned you are my Sin Darling Don't you Tremble when I embrace you The cold and Dark may fill every marrow But at least there were here For You Tell Me how they So Loved You Tell Me All of your fears When the world is done and all their trust will render Undone I will always be with you And Now We cease to Exist Luciferia I can see your Misery Just follow me and believe Me We are The Damned Outcasts of this Natural World We are The Damned Hold on I'll show you what you're waiting for We Are The Damned Join Our Dark Reality When you know the choice the Wind Will come right through And you will See what you're really meant to Be Draining into the Night Shivering With the Smallest of Frights I am the Ghost In Your Dreams I watch You Through the Window Yes that is your name Written In Blood Are You Scared? Are You Suffering? The Dark fate is what was Meant to Be This is what happens when you Brake Us with Words Destroy us with sights Twists are minds Set our will On Fire I can see your Misery Just follow me and believe Me We are The Damned Outcasts of this Natural World We are The Damned Hold on I'll show you what you're waiting for We Are The Damned Join Our Dark Reality When you know the choice the Wind Will come right through And you will See what you're really meant to Be I can see your Misery Just follow me and believe Me We are The Damned Outcasts of this Natural World We are The Damned Hold on I'll show you what you're waiting for We Are The Damned Join Our Dark Reality When you know the choice the Wind Will come right through And you will See what you're really meant to Be

Details | Free verse | |


Breath stolen breeds sharpness
Borne backward into infantile shrieks
The spinstress of sinew waits bated
For abhorrent heat
Of combustive, collapsive
Crossfire from echoing throat
Or burnt-bridge lungs
A visceral nymph thoughtlessly thieves
On Benedict tongue
Thrashing in maddened pace
Too shrill a manifesto
Skeletal soldiers charge
A red hill
Unsteady, uneven, not ready
Frenzy, not frolic
I am not a goddess
There is something to fear
I am something, I fear

Details | Rhyme | |


-Dedicated to all those suffering with an eating disorder. Beauty, true beauty, belies a gentrified, pretty exterior. You are not alone-

Benighted whispers and spurning dreams
Forthwith in blisters and burning streams

Shameful saunters in billowing blight
Hereto haunters with pillowing plight

Weep and wither betwixt a bawling bloom
Seep shall deliver amidst a falling fume

Expel and deliver for the morning's bright
Swell and shiver for the swarming's night


Details | Free verse | |

If I tell You

If I Tell You, 2011
Vickie M. Ortiz Vazquez

If I tell you, Puerto Rican I am
What comes to mind?
Morena of “el barrio” or Blonde woman of “el barrio”
Better yet, pale skin-blonde from up north
That one, the straight English-speaking wanna-be
“Con su pelo lacio”

If I tell you, Puerto Rican I am
Could you describe who I am?
Woman controlled, subjected by Welfare
Carrying on the poor women cycle
You know, the one imposed by the few rich white men
Would you think of me in a bright light; dim light?

If I tell you, Puerto Rican I am
Do you envision an immigrant, alien?
A woman once taken and brought at age 15
Beginning of her womanhood
Tormented by loneliness, isolation, ignorance
Frustrated by the never ending question, “Are you mixed?”
Misunderstood by her citizenship
Seen as unfair by many
Slaved island, unrealized
Are you able to narrate which Puerto Rican woman am I?
If I tell you, Puerto Rican I am

Puerto Rican I am
“Café con leche,” Afro-hair, big lips, small nose
Distance between what I was and inspire to be
Clinching to her African heritage

If I tell you, Puerto Rican I am
Can you explain the injustice my hair endured?
Constant search for assimilation
To break free
Impacted by those with similar skin color, Afro hair, big lips

If I tell you, Puerto Rican I am
Do you paint two contrasting siblings?
Light, dark complexions
Tall dark father with short light mother by his side

If I tell you, Puerto Rican I am
Do your pages bleed from inspiration?
Would I read between the lines, a woman becoming her own?
Struggling between many worlds
Or, do you spell the notion of loud, submissive, sex symbol
You know, the one portrayed in the media

If I tell you, Puerto Rican I am
Can you decipher, WEEEEPA

Details | Free verse | |

Intergalactic Nightlight

The crystalline drip-drops 
of sun and stars
hang in the air
like birds who've lost the will to fly.

(It's not like they have any other place to be.)

Is the Earth turning
or are we?
Trapped in an endless cycle
(rinse, wash, repeat)
of sad and joy,
Forgetting to live because
   we fear losing
     our ability
      to even get
       that chance.       

(when will you realize you are the only player?)

And we are a generation living
             (keep digging)
Poisoned by the concrete sky weighing on our bones.

The rain we deluded ourselves into feeling
was never quite there to begin with.
And like an intergalactic nightlight,
the moon guides me to the end of this world.

Details | Rhyme | |

Hear That Whisper

Hear That Whisper?

 That faint whisper one can almost hear at the break of day
 is the angels fluttering dragging the last of 
 the stubborn intense pains of darkness away!

 That roar one hears as the damn gates loudly clank to
 is dark shadows locking the miseries into you!

 That wailing cry you hear just before sweet morn's light
 is your heart screaming for iron chains to break open
 the bindings cutting your throat all the evil night!

 That sad remorse lumping up in your burning hot throat
 is the dregs of sorrows that cast in the deep blues
 as you lay there helpless in a burning, sinking boat!

 Never hear that whisper and feel so proud and relieved
 is that your fantasy that gives you a moments rest
 or hell about to break loose in a soul forever aggrieved!

Robert J. Lindley , 08-03-2014

Details | Rhyme | |



A diminished cemetery lies in the ruins of tombstones..
You can hear the whistle of the wind in mysterious tones..
The rusty gate hangs on its last resource..
The dark rocky path leading through needs reinforced..
Around the old ruins of tombstones grow enormous weeds.
They stretch to the moon as if to satisfy their needs..
The indignant dark fog looks like the passing angel of death..
The wind dies down emancipating its last breath..
The wilted limbs loom over from the weight of the leaves..
In the muggy fetid air starts a disturbing haunting breeze..
Creatures of the dark lurk in the spots of the murky night..
The half moon in the sky looks as if the darkness took a bite..
The eerie night is placid laced with silence.
The peaceful cemetery owns no violence..
Poison ivy fingers its way through a torn down wall..
The howl in the night beckons other calls..
The cemetery holds its subjects in capture..
They wait peacefully for the life thereafter...

Details | I do not know? | |

Dark desires

   Dark desires

Too silent creep’s our dark desires
Here ‘neath this twilight spent,
For there shall rest no love divine 
Nor the warmth of a lost tomorrow, 
But the sound is born with gentle strains  
In this night of dark desires

For truth is kept for purity
And lies are long forgot,
And passion remains till its run its course  
And its truth has passed away,
But the ages are all bound to us
And clasped with a drop of gold 

Abandoned all our dark desires
When came the simple light,  
And arises from out our own intent
Things gone to the twilight spent;
But solitude holds the innocent 
In memory of dark desires


Details | Free verse | |

Once Here Now Dead

Once here
Now dead & gone
“What am I known for, this time round?”
I exist only as a memory now
A memory that fades, over time
“Who will remember me, when I am gone?”

No one knew me
Yet people will say they knew me, so well!
A laugh, how often people think “they are experts”
Yet, really
Know nothing at all!

“How well did you know the inside of me?”
For, if I was to ask...
“What is my favourite colour?”
Or, “what’s my favourite song?”
I listen for answers...none come

“What’s my favourite food to eat?”
Complete silence...
I could hear a pin drop!
“Do these questions fall upon deaf ears?”
For I ask...

“Who truly knew me?”
“What am I known for?”
“Who will remember me?”
When I am dead & gone

Details | I do not know? | |

SSRI's and I

SSRI's and I ...

... the sounds of thoughts clattering, my neurones sparking,
like Dylan said, my morning recedes jingling and a-jangling,

worn down by this leaden knot, tearing my insides out,
the cacophony drowned in a whisper, lost in a silent shout,

dreams and screams scratching the back of my dry throat,
caged in, liberation hovering like a mirage beyond the moat.

I claw my way, slowly, through a thicket of solitude,
feeling my emotions peeling, stung by unseen nettles,

crawling to an open field, to rest, beneath a sky ablaze with stars,
as my mind glides, brushing the soft grass as it peacefully settles ...

Details | Rhyme | |

A Painter's Nightmare

A Painter's Nightmare

 I have been painting where the bird of vengeance tears out the coward's heart
 large brush strokes given with an angry scowl and deep frown tossed in to boot
 Land between where the blessed soul and the inner spirit of man do ever part
 as rough and stout as an old mighty oak tree with withered rock anchored root

 A canvas as big and glowing bright as the imagination of a happily playing child
 setting up toy soldiers to battle fiercely until the mighty war God tires of his play
 Incoming dark spirits unchained and commanded to destroy in vengeance gone wild
 all that defiantly dare to fight with courage and pluck while in their way

 Each stroke begs for another more vibrant and deeper that the one blasted on before
 as the picture looms large sending darkened chills up my old and stiffened spine
 A shriek comes forth from behind that castle's bloody and heavy iron gated door
 revealing the angry beast has just fled and all will soon be blissfully quiet and fine..

Details | Rhyme | |


Take off the ARMOR OF GOD!
   Remove the BREASTPLATE OF RIGHTEOUSNESS!                  
     Throw away the SHIELD OF FAITH!   
         Forget the TRUTH OF GOD’S WORD!

Let’s do what we want to do
        in our dark secret world,
           at our dark secret place, 
               at our own selfish pace.

Let’s make our own choices.
Let’s listen to our own voices.      

Let’s act by the power of
    OUR might.
It doesn’t have to be right.
Let’s do it anyway. 
Let’s go astray.

And when we leave that darkness and
   face family and friends,
They’ll never know about our dark place
   or of our dark secret sins.

We will not worry about the 
We are fully protected by 
         Satan’s fences.

And if we die in our
    sinful state,
Hell has an open gate.



POEM is based on these scriptures:

Ephesians 6:10-12: Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might.  Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.  For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.

Details | Free verse | |

Short Life

Life begins.
The Genesis
Of a new person.

Eyes blink--
The child sees.
He tastes the world.
He explores and learns.

Innocence lost
The child turns to man.

Heart torn--
Man forgets
The joys of life.
He sinks in shadow.

Heart stops--
One moment
Before Death comes
To see life is short.

Details | Free verse | |

Dissolute Monk

I am like a Siberian tiger
Creeping through taigas
Looking for great power

A letter arrived one evening
Praising my hypnotic gaze
And you craving a carnal touch

I arrived with a prophecy
My magic cured Tsarina’s son
And led me up to autocracy

You can shoot me, poison me
But I will rise again, you will see
The evil protects me eternally

Details | Free verse | |


At night it creeps
It lurks
With evil smirks
At little girls'
Deadly cirque 

Slowly it awakens
Breathing fire 
Into the taken
Souls of the burning unknown

The monster inside
That slowly consumes
That slowly destroys
That slowly reminds
Of what she has started
When little girl let him in 
when she let crimson 
finally be seen

Tried to hide
No hope no previal
Tried to run
No breath no strength
Tried to see
No flight no light

With sharp teeth
And sharper claws
Monster grasp at 
Little girl

Taking hold of 
Her soul
Her mind 
Her being
Her entire whole
Not daring to let go
Monster feeds 
On what can never...

Little girl tries to be
Tries to free 
Herself from Monster
That lives inside

Drowning in dreams
Monster let little girls see
As soon as eyes shut
To try and breathe

Cables not threads
Monster bound
To never let little girls
Run and be found
By other free souls
That monster couldn't hold

As little girls
Late at night
Stare at path finder
Comfort to seek
Monster creeps
Up from behind
Slinging ropes
Around gasping throat
Of little girls' lost hope

Little girls' screams silent
As Monster grips tighter
Little girls try to fight
But monsters might
To strong 
To tight

Worth lost
Love wasted
As monster inhales
Last bit of little girls' soul
Too ugly
Too weak
Not good enough for any too keep

Pride lost
Disgrace found
Little girl?
Monster now

Details | Free verse | |


(vrs 1)
with fingertips and tears that froze
you saw my fall from grace,
a crying shame.
and watched me go black to blue
go black to blue then burst to gold.

so confused and starved of love
youre shattered and broke
dancing on my grave with my skeletal bones,
you've never found what you seek,
walking backstreets alone.

you know that i am lost
you know ill never wake
you know that i am dark and deep
you know that i am fast asleep
and you cant accept im gone.

(vrs 2)
the worlds turned its back to forget
one soul thats left
you are the only ehart that knows
the one that died
still lives inside
still lives and cries for one.

and when it comes down to the truth
i was just a dying fool
who could not feel or breath
but survived off poisoned memories that never really happened.

you know that i am lost
you know ill never wake
you know that i am dark and deep
you know that i am fast asleep
and you cant accept im gone.

(vrs 3)
see me through the smoke
and tho im dead i still can love.
im deep inside your cigarette
you'll take me in
tho im a mess
tho ive layed down to rest.

(vrs 4)
dark and deep
i am fast asleep
i am fast asleep
you know that ive found peace.

Details | Free verse | |

Dead Streets

There is no life.                                                                    
No life where I live
in this safe state.
Content with their power 
of achievement. 
Holding a necessity 
to show everyone 

Driving their cars...
                  cars that are borrowed
paying debt each month
                 Driving up their long
That leads to a wide 

A separate house
to warm their prize 

What fine wine to drink tonight?
Calling fake friends
followed by fake hello’s

Put the 72 inch screen 
here or there?
Does rug match curtain?
Does little Jimmy
have brand new cleats?
Do my jeans pass my budget?
                    over 75 dollars

Parents starring at pay
rather than blood

I must leave

Where people aren’t in
their cocoon of safety 
I need to leave
venturing for life
Pretending no more
that I fit in with this 
mask of a life 

Details | Free verse | |

The Light

A dark angel without wings 
The trumpet call of light
surrounds the universe

God Almighty, is this light.

Strike a match in a dark room,
and you will see who scampers without choice 
The light always wins but my mind is dark
The light does not have authority over it
We must invite the light in 
The light forces no hand 
Freedom comes at a price

A bloody tree is justice for our darkness
A gift that needs to be opened to make the blackness flee
The wisest of all have been confounded by this light
It has been in place since the beginning of time.
Opinion does not change truth, and a lit match,
will not change the course of time --

Details | I do not know? | |

Dark City

In this one big city
Where the lights are always on,
The people lower their heads 
With the burden which they were born.

The lights, they always sparkle
With a promise it never keeps,
Tormenting the souls around them
Preventing them from sleep.

In this one great city
Where the traffic doesn't cease,
And tired souls trudge endlessly
Through dark and empty streets.

Dark and empty streets
That lead you down to hell,
A demise of soul and sentiment
Discarding an empty shell.

In this one dark city
Where clouds gather in wait,
To spill their murky load
On those awaiting their fate.

Some struggle through
And make of it what they can,
Others are easily defeated
With no survival plan.

In this one decietful city
Nothing is as it seems,
Where fantasy is reality;
Consciousness is dreams.

There is no distinction;
It all merges into one.
And no one would give a damn
If the moon became the sun.

In one impulsive city
Where everyone gets high;
A relief from the monotony,
Or the fact we're going to die.

Obliteration and disaster
Is what we have created,
Money, greed and religion
Somehow lead to hatred.

This is London city
So beware to those that come,
Bewitched by all the prospects
When really there are none.

Details | Free verse | |

My Youth in Asia

i was eight
the first time-
i saw Yin-Yang Mountain.
the height of it’s peak
contrasted by
the light on one side
dark on the other.
as the sun travels
from east to west
the color of the slopes change-
the light becoming dark
the dark becoming light.

i stand on the peak of Yin-Yang Mountain
watching the shifting
light and dark.
the line dividing the sinuous halves
is my being.
am I dark or light?
a white line or
a black line?
i am the curve between.
i am the difference.
i am the deciding factor.

i stand now 
beside the River of Life.
my feet bare-
i step into the cool waters
observing the shifting reflection
and shadow.
the current swirls the dark and the light.
this life giving, fluid filled gully
brings darkness when one is consumed
by its waters.
above the light is reflected-
below it is swallowed.

soothed i sit-
resting below the shelter
of the Tree of Constance.
the trunk is thick
made of layers of living matter within-
dead matter out.
the dead bark surrounds
the living core-
from this sturdy core 
branches shoot towards the light.
from those branches shoot buds-
which contain life-giving seeds.
the seeds fall to the ground below.

laying upon the dark
mineral rich earth-
i imagine.
below my body burrow
insects and roots.
they depend upon the fertile 
ground for survival.
humans have turned this earth into 
a burial ground for the fallen.
the rotting bodies consumed in darkness
feed the creatures who dwell
in the earth.
these departed whisper
knowledge to fallen seeds.
imparting wisdom-
to ensure growth.
I return to the peak-
of Yin-Yang Mountain.

from this peak i observe
the mixture around me.
here on this peak I know
the answers.
i am the wisdom.
this knowledge has paralyzed me.
with this gift i have been silenced.
i am the dividing line-
i am the question.
with faith I fall-
from the peak of Yin-Yang Mountain
into the icy waters of the
River of Life.
it’s turbulent ebb and flow
fills me with life 
and destroys me when dragged upon its floor.
i wash upon the shore
gasping for air-
clinging to the root.
I succumb.
i begin to rot-
feeding the earth-
that feeds the tree-
that thrives beside the river-
which dwells upon the slopes
of Yin-Yang Mountain.
here i will remain-
until discovered-
and then understood-
my Youth in Asia.

Details | Free verse | |


The still sea needs a full moon; a tidal wave only weeps in the darkness.  
Is there sunlight on the horizon?  I feel no warmth.  
She’s frozen in my memories.  

I chip away at the bricks in this cell
When the guards go out for a smoke.  
Don’t know where I’d go if I found a passage anyway.  

There is no direction.  The heavens must be full.  No room at the inn.  
I wander aimlessly through shadows.  Do ghosts dream?  
I do.  So I can’t be dead yet. 

They tell me a reprieve is coming.  So I hang on 
Staring though the bars when not reading the Big Book.  
It’s the same as the bible for old drunks like me.  

Inspired by the same Muse though another modern day apostle. 
A modern day saint for the addicted congregation searching for a savior.

It’s says keep coming back until the miracle happens.  
The enlightenment of a spiritual awakening.   

Love the Lord your God with all thy heart and Love your neighbor as thy self. 
The secret revealed.  How can a man foreign to self- love, love others? 

Where is the mountain top?  The cleansing wind of forgiveness blowing through me?  
I broke too many commandments.  Worshiped idols.   

But, the earth keeps turning and time keeps ticking. 
The full moon will rise and the tide will come 

And I will be on that beach to let it wash over me until the morning comes.  
I will rise with the sun and walk into a new day. 

The Light will scare the shadows away and I will be a free man,
Because the Big Book tells me so.

Details | Rhyme | |


WHY are those who have nothing obsessed over wealth?
WHY are less hospitals less concerned about Health?
WHY are the Homeless still Forsaken/Forlorn?
WHY the Great Earthquake which left Haiti to mourn?
WHY the fuss over Mexicans?...most do no evil or rob
WHY arrest and deport them?...just give them a job
WHY all the shows about vampires, werewolves and witches?
WHY are some rappers such retards, and call Black Women bitches?

So many people Unfaithful, yet, we're "Bought with a Price?
Then WHY krishna/Buddha, and not Jesus Christ?

WHY the murder of children?...this we can't get around
WHY Carly Bruscha, and Nix Mary Brown?
People running to mischief, it seems a pandemic trait
WHY senseless killings on The First 48?

WHY pools of Oil on the Gulf, which threatens those on the coast
WHY do they think their lives over, when still more Blessed than most?
WHY does a person never sick suddenly breathe their last gasp?
WHY are simple things in this lifetime the most hardest to grasp?

There's vast changes in weather, time to Pray and Reflect
It's a sign from Our Maker, not "The Green House Effect"

Without The Lord in our existence, we live each day as mere pawns
WHY does it seem we weep loudest before the Light Of Hope dawns?

The next WHY? an Enigma....requires deep contemplation
WHY did Jehovah choose Israel over every other nation?

Abundant things I can't fathom, though I ponder and try...
2010, eight years later...the question still remains....WHY?

Details | Free verse | |

Abusive Love

Cold case lover, how I loved you so!
You always mattered
But, you never believed me!
You were my every desire
You were everything to me!
Looking through your eyes
Jaded with jealousy and envy
You laid your hands upon me
Acting out your emotional
And bitter pain
“Why were you so mean spirited?"
“Who messed with your mind?"
How can you kneel before me, now
Pleading me to forgive you
As, you bawl your eyes out

Your relentless begging
Over and over
You keep playing mind games, with me!
Begging me, for mercy
To come back,
One, last, time...

With my swollen eyes
Broken bones
Twisted up, insides
My heart is torn!
“Are you a dead man walking?"
“Do you not ‘feel’ no more”?
Will I get to see tomorrow’s sunrise
If, I stay another day with you...

Playing Russian roulette with my life
I am terrified, I am petrified!
My eyes are blind
My heart too forgiving!
But, I am not leaving.

“Will I become a cold case murder, one day?"
I wonder...
At the hands, of my own stupidity!
“What will you do on that day, dear lover?"
“Will you lie and be deceitful?"
“Will you hide things?"
Just like, you did from me!

Will, you ‘vow’ devotedly
You did it all in the name of ‘Love?'
Will you brag about
Your ‘bitter, sweet victory?
Open wounds
Bleeding soul
Release me free
From this man’s betrayal!

Details | Rhyme | |

Self Hate

You sit alone
And always think
How life flew by
In just a wink
Those busy days
What did they mean
You wasted time
That's what they seem
You looked at others every day
Ne'r a nice word did you say
For them life appeared all sunny
Sure you thought
They all had money
But no one one ever stole your wealth
Yet squandered it along with health
So easy now to spew out blame
You take no credit for the shame
Cash rich friends go out to eat
A supermarket's your last treat
Those lucky folks can go to shows
While your few bucks
On bills just flows
You clearly saw your downward trend
You clearly knew how it would end
And now you're old
You've met your fate
Thank God
There's no one left to hate

Details | Free verse | |


Uselessness hit me again 
Will the madness rear its face
My soft cool demeanor appear
Smiles and gentle looks
Twice a week it comes 
Comforting those I love
When the storm lays waste to my soul
My inner darkness steps forth 
Around the house a loud thud
That all can distinguish
Banging away in my brain
I repulse those around me
Driving them past sanity
Like a car, I careen off the road
It rouses darkness
Mowing down the lovely roses
That I clipped and put in a vase for you
The disgust you feel
I cannot hold you at blame
The demon fires
No water will quench
How I long for my serene
Angelic actions to be present
Only the dirty water drips from my eyes
If only I could meter out my emotions
Then you could enjoy my company
Relish in my delicate nature
But those days of sunshine
And flashy dragonflies fade so quick

Details | Narrative | |

The midnight plant-watering ritual

Long after the neighborhood sprinklers
had shushed the night into silence
the closing of a door interrupted
and a dark figure glided across
the lawn, behind a wall
and disappeared.

A moment later it reappeared
and the face of a man could be seen
flickering like a candle in the streetlights

Suddenly the man stopped
and the world
like a
beneath his feet.

It became unbearable to stand
and he sat on a porch step beside a stray cat

Sharp shadows crossed 
the man’s face and
an orange glint of
light was reflected
in his spectacles.

His cat purred as
he stroked it but
he looked straight forward
and did not smile.

His attention was focused
on a pinprick of light
in the vast dark canopy
called night.
He pondered his place
in the universe as 
tufts of hair fell
from his hand
and were

Details | Rhyme | |

Moonlit Passage

On steadfast passage, I observe,
though I surely walk alone…
The soft moonlight cannot obscure,
footprints among the stones…
Have I walked this path before?
Perhaps these prints are mine?
I’ve traveled far, yet here they are,
they’ve stood the test of time.
These faded clues, by midnight hue,
have filled my mind with déjà vu…
Some memories form,
then try to leave.
But clues belie them I believe…
I journey through the dark of night,
to validate by morning light.
The tarnished traces, memories cast,
on stepping stones of travels past…
Copyright © 2014

Details | Verse | |


Disguise Deception he knows, the devils goals be hidden, drawing souls to his realm. Darkness he uses with delightful promises. Despite the masquerade, dawn brings the truth.
Barbara Gorelick Pleiades contest 4/24/14

Details | Villanelle | |

Road To Home

Wash boardy ruff country roads leading home
Sun dried each day of your long useful life
Over dark green fields no more will I roam

Those dark green fields that are wide leads to wrong
Not warmth, love, understanding, only strife
Wash boardy ruff country roads leading home

Harder to climb, narrower close to home
Nearer, nearer begin to see great sights
Over dark green fields no more will I roam

Drawing, drawing come, long hill top see dome
There are friends, family, offering life
Wash boardy ruff country roads leading home

The fields were greener, there was fun, the songs
Offering entertainment  glitter sights
Over dark green fields no more will I roam

Now sights focused on heavenly song
Lights brighter at end of the narrow way
Wash boardy ruff country roads leading home
Over dark green fields no more will I roam

Details | Free verse | |

The Outsiders

I cry in the dark as I lie in bed,
For all the lonely, friendless, damaged ones,
Wounded by cruel, unjust words.
Spoken to maim, cripple, demean,
Words dipped in Sweetened Condensed Milk.
The persona innocent humour.
Gladiators'  surrounding the victim,
The spectator's smirk, grin, preen, bolster,
their  peacock delicate esteems.
Power rush to the ego,
Star role guaranteed,
Still glitter, will attract the Gladiator people.
An outsider will sit alone,
Watch  the Stars  of this world shine,
Hoping for someone from the star kingdom to be kind,
enquire if they are fine.
Invisible ones survive,
A few fly reach the sky.
Eventually on mass the invisible Outsiders,
Come to accept what the Superiors'  call mundane.
Putting aside dreams, realists now,
No room for fantasy, frivolity.
In their world play it safe,
No surprises, excitement, 
Stone cold reality reigns.
There  are scales  in my mind I see,
I try to balance...theres's no way it can done.
The chasm is huge between the realists, superiors , dreamer's.'
Confusion, sadness, anger intertwines,
How can they do this to each other?
Whom we call our brother, sister.
This question isn't new,
It's been here from the beginning.
Abel's blood from the ground cries out,
Still calls unheeded, unheard.
The fire siren penetrates the silence of the night,
A single tear drops,
I weep  as the  dreams crumble,
Flower petals at their feet,
I cry in the dark as I lie in bed,
For all the lonely, friendless, damaged ones as they sleep

Details | Sonnet | |

Honest Introspection

I sought more than I could ever attain 
In a long, foolish quest destined to fail.
A passage to a world where storm clouds reign
And in every corner a tragic tale.

Pain's royal throne in destiny's wicked clutch,
Front row seats to a future of despair
For thinking I could ever mean that much,
A foolish hope in an endless nightmare.

Just a sad puppet on a lonely string,
Forever trapped in a sadist's dream,
Driven into darkness by love's painful sting,
Traveling fast, down a treacherous stream. 

Waiting here in agony for you.
Why? It's simple. It's because I love you.

Details | Rhyme | |

Angel of Death

A million thoughts run through my head,
A thousand words i wished i had said, 
A hundred lines i should have read,
So many things left unfinished, 
Life taken never to be replenished, 
An unlikely angel in the dark of night
Resembling an outre flying kite,
Feel the breeze of freedom
 when her wings spread, 
Suddenly it occurs the captivity in being dead,
Confinement to this addiction
 is much like being ridden to a bed,;
overnight it seems the soul was diminished, 
devirginized without getting kissed,
she appears in an otiose light, 
promising there is no better feeling
 than aboard her heavenly flight,
Once in her embrace the skies turn red, 
she gets a taste and devours like she has never been fed,
 In those final hours astray one has been led,
 through the dark unknown she carries me
 until I disappear in the mist,
rendering me to a state of weakness and deadly bliss;
My eyes see the image of her bad intentions
 but they cannot grasp the truth in sight, 
By sunrise I know she will have won this fight

Details | Cowboy | |

Deadwood Hill

(At Wild Bill Hickok’s Grave)

Those bold Black Hills of South Dakota,
Darkly murmur of all your Badlands—
You have left now like the Lakota—
On that hillside your monument stands.

Hills pulse under Ponderosa pines—
Strong night breezes have yet much to say—
Legends linger on lips and pale shrines—
They know that Wild Bill once passed this way.

You sleep long in this last resting place,
That now overlooks sinful Deadwood—
It is here that we still see your face,
Yet ponder if you were bad or good.

They moved your petrified form it’s said—
Casket opened, though some thought it wrong—
Your dark face yet perfect, though long dead—
Your fair hair still so flaxen and long.  

Jane Cannary lays mute beside you—
A calamity that is no more—
As you study those cards in the blue—
Play that dead man’s hand from a far shore.

Saffron leaves and stern winds shape your grave—
And your name’s one that we all know still—
As you raise dark death’s ante and save,
One last red ace to trump Deadwood hill.

Details | Free verse | |

The Moon Between the Trees

It was the night after the full Moon.
This was the night that I saw the Moon between the trees.
It was huge! It was the color of melon!
My world was lit as my life had instantly risen.
I saw light gray clouds all dismayed with dark blue visions.
My moment had come forth and all at once, 
I felt a life inside myself begin to breathe.
Three decades of life had passed by me.
Cascades of shadows erupting dark and gray!
Now they evolve in true sight and all of this was for my eyes to see!
“Oh My God”, dear God, this is my world mine all mine in every way!
And this is what I have dropped before Thee?
At such a long distance, that glimmer has covered over me.
So many nights I lay before Thee.
Not one word and not even one moment heard.
For it was silence, for I could not breathe!

An hour had passed since I saw the Moon between the trees.
It had vanished and no longer could my own eyes see,
That dark blue vision, the one that would not let me feel a breeze!
I saw that melon with its glimmer, the one that had covered over me.
I felt my breath deep down inside of me and I finally began to breathe.
“Oh My God”! My dearest God, I have found what I lay before Thee!
I have found the vision of gray and how huge it was for my eyes to see!
“My dearest dear God, my only one and true God”, 
Oh my how I have forsaken this precious life you have given to me!

Details | Rhyme | |


There is
this concern of stars
hovering, ober, our heads…
Heady stuff, what awaits above!
methodologies, of those southern
who muck about so
much upon our lives…
exist, or exit; what
other choices are there?
we, US, you and I;
choose our individual ways
and, we head-butt those forces
which block our views
crushing facial bones and
driving noses back into
that soft flesh…
I, digress; life and living
what are these?
drams and grams, synonyms
and antonyms or anagrams?
across all of earth’s lines
drawn in that soft sweet sand…
Worst or best, north, south,
east, and west because, we can
walk, and talk, and seek
rapport and commune with all…
Adrift in these winds
of changing times and action’s schism’
the worst is what we choose
the best; is what God
has decided for the all of US
and his orders?
Do end all evil doers
who are hiding behind that
veiled terrain which is in full view…
We, in darkness; they,
in darkness way down there
you all know what
I am talking about
those without the light
and will of the big guy
must be used; like they
have used the all of you
off with their heads!
deeper in to that pit
do shove them, butt
do remember to forgive them
fore, they know not what they do
and further, to these current
ways of living…
How, does that adage glow?
It is, better to give than to receive
or, to the effect so please he
who will affect your
afterlife’ comfort…
Imagine one, or the other
way to spend eternity
and in your current reality;
surreal insecurity or
sweetness’ purity
at any time, coming
to your communities…

Details | Rhyme | |


The red tail light of the 737 flashed rhythmically against the dark skyline

It taxied its approach on the runway, everything was set, it all looked fine

She looked out the window across the dark land wondering if he was there

She had left him a note, she explained it all to him, she told him that she cared

She checked her gold watch as the planes engines powered up, starting to whine

This time is for me, she thought to herself, I deserve it, it’s all mine

The plane took off racing down the airstrip about to take flight

I have known for a long time about this, I have always been right

As the plane left the ground and accelerated up into the midnight sky

She questioned herself, her note and considered one last, just one more try

Details | Free verse | |


No matter how deep you think you dug
The earth on top still lies fresh
In a heartbeat
In a teardrop
In the flutter of a Raven’s wings
Mere seconds it takes
For those memories
Those feeling that ache
To be dug up and placed at your feet
Soiled from the time wasted
Bitter from the Chance lost
You feel sickened
Like you are nothing better than a flea bitten mutt
You see your failures
All you have done
The chances that you have lost
In the barrel of a gun
Where am I now?
Staring six feet down
At all I could have had
All I threw away
What am I?
Kicked on the ground by my own heal
Bleeding slowly by my own hand
Heart faltering by my own actions
At the edge of darkness I stand
Wondering what could have been
I should have corrected my sin
I should have buried myself with it all
For I am nothing without them
A man I should have cherished more
A friend I should have been there for
A stranger that I could not spare a kindness
I will dig a grave for myself
Close my eyes and dream
Imagine a life where I did not fail
And slowly forget to breathe.

Details | Verse | |


THE TEMPEST 1 For a twisted tale And blinded pride, We are taken by the tempest, Fighting everyone, anyone But for what? A war, For the furtherance of a man’s folly Over the graveyards That will give no rest, Even to the dead. 2 A little spark, is how it starts Before our kith and kin Are often dislodged By the torrent of despair; Our children and all Are soon required to starve But for what? Their part of expense in a war To obtain a graveyard That gives no rest To our dying people. 3 The blast of hot air Could be the doing of another Yet our silence Shall spread the plague of death, And the future May well be gone in flames And all for what? But the sake of a graveyard That can give no rest To the living or the dead.

Details | Narrative | |

A Flickering Flame

Ah, a flickering flame with shadows on the wall,
With glimmering lights rolling all around!
I will remember them all!
A flame so high,
But a flame so low,
A burn out in time!
A linger much too slow,
A flickering flame,
A moment that I claim!

Ah, a flickering flame where light covers dark and dark covers light.
With glimmering lights bouncing all over the walls!
A vision of true sight!
A flame so unpredictable,
But a flame so respectable!
A flame hard to know,
And one that can’t be controlled!
A flickering flame,
A moment that I gain!

Ah, a flickering flame showing dim light within its own domain.
With shimmering lights reflecting a glare of golden visions burning too bright!
How very well maintained!
A flame so harmless,
But a flame much too careless!
A flame too passive,
And one that’s way too captive!
Ah, a flickering flame,
A moment that I’m holding with no shame!

Details | Lyric | |


Milky blue light drenching particle specks lightened by contrasting swoops of foggy spectacle
Further surpassed by mass internal affairs given off to sight after years of waiting for enlightenment
To be distanced and held secret for generations of life
Sinister confusion in count and account but simple in glance and embrace
Held by eye represented as such as well surrounding darkness in human sight
Beauty to the few common sight to all but neglected magnitude nonetheless
To be embraced in movement across the dark blue in irreverence to the rest and its lack of movement
But left in perfect motion on rare occurrence given to heart and patience and luck
Set in life and represented as such to guide cycle and light in the human contrast
Never-ending to the short-lived life, but soon to close for the life of the heartbeat of the world
But until time comes to retract readjust and begin again, the dark eye along with its surrounding,
beauty must gaze at the last half of the day in awe and in silence with the world being the hourglass and the telescope in which gaze is possible. 
Until closure is inevitable once more.

Details | Free verse | |


The evil
that you so deeply fear
cannot be hidden from
It is no faceless thing
to be avoided
It lies
behind your child's eyes
It grows
in your neighbor's smile
It crawls
from your lover's body heat
It moves,
multiplies in the silence
And no matter how
fast you run
hard you pray
you can never
never escape
because this evil
this vile, obscene
putrid thing

inside you
feeding on your thought
on your actions
and on every single
violent dream.

Details | Free verse | |


There are choices and destiny.
I was destined to be born.
My will sat by waiting
while I drew my first breath
and screamed.  I was detined
to scream, weep, sorrow, moan.

My will is not overcome by the immensity
of my destiny.  The first moment I decided
not to cry, and drew calm baby's breath,
maybe it was my mother's hand,
maybe the light in the nursery,
my will was enjoined to my destiny.

My destiny set me afloat
like a ship on a wine dark sea,
but my will is not idle,
like a good first mate,
she sounds the alarm
for storm clouds,
and steers clear
of that so dark horizon.

My will and my destiny enjoined,
they grow up together, like children.
Well of course, they are both me;
we are set upon this wine dark sea.

Details | Free verse | |


I was sitting  in a salon one day
Flooded by pheromones and sweet perfume
My hair being coiffed while I stare ahead
When a little taste of death soon appeared

Moving like a dark leopard into view
Thinly clad inside a searing black dress
Cutting her eyes in throat slitting slashes
Nailing everyone down in the room

Her draining essence sucking at us all
She enthroned herself upon a high chair
Lifting her long black hair over the back 
Letting it fall in a dark veil, she smiled

Her eyes saying you mean nothing to me
Ordering her servant of her desires
Her diamonded hands and ears glittering fire
Opening her phone, dismissing the room

The sight of these vampires is startling
It’s difficult to pity their victims
They get exactly for what they have paid
Not a single conscience between the two 

Details | Free verse | |

Red Heart

I have in my deepest heart
All the people and all the things
That keep me up and draw bright red numbers down
I saw the side of marriage that children fear
I fell for some one I shouldn't have
I fell for two some ones
I broke a lost heart
I woke up a scaled king
I helped shatter a mind
I drew a dark letter on my life
I confessed my heart, drunk on the phone
I was unproductive
I let things happen
I let people manipulate me
I fell for a goddess who can never bless me
I cried
I was afraid
I drew another dark letter
I colored it red
And then I did the worst thing in the world
I just kept digging that dark hole deeper
I only have myself to blame
And the scariest part is
It only starts out red

Details | Cowboy | |

That Old Heartpine Gate

So cinch tight my shimmering dark sorrel
With fine hand-tooled saddle of silver inlay—
I’ll pull on my calfskin chaparajos
And through that old heartpine gate I’ll ride away.

I’ve been too long on this sagebrush prairie.
Through many a rancho gate welcome and not—
With some I stayed and herded and prospered,
While with some I gave up much more than I got.

But I’ve rode toward that last gate in my life
And next that rosadero I’ll sit for awhile—
Until that bright entryway swings open
And I ride in meek and accepting as a child.

So cinch tight my shimmering dark sorrel
With fine hand-tooled saddle of silver inlay—
I’ll pull on my calfskin chaparajos
And through that old heartpine gate I’ll ride away.

Details | Rhyme | |

my words

Sitting here bored out of my mind 
I think back to better days left behind
I only wish to not be so leery 
As my body gets quite weary 
And my eyes begin to close

As they close the scene around me changes
And everything quickly rearranges
Making it all seem so blurry
Like surrounded by quick falling flurries
Then everything gets quite numb

The numbness leads to a dark denial
Leaving me without that smile
That smile that pushed me to be dreaming
Inside a head that’s always screaming
Screaming for the falling rapture known today as life

For this life that seems so endless
This life that leaves your body listless
Makes me wonder why we wonder
Sitting here to rot and ponder

I hit my knees wanting forgiveness
For making life such an extreme mess
For causing others pain and sorrow
For being to weak to live till the morrow

And as my pleading comes to end
Everything grows dark again
An echoing silence then fills my head 
Like all my thoughts were painted and bled

For in my head filled utter black
A blackness that had held me back
And then a light shined from afar
Breaking my silence and deaths bar

My eyes opened to the warmth of you smile
The smile they seemed to last for miles
And the beauties of your soft sweet kiss 
That always made each day the best

Leaving me knowing of that love inside
The love I tried so hard to hide
The love that brought me here to you
Leaving me loving everything you do.

Details | Rhyme | |


                                    Dark finds way to touch the light			
                                             Can it really do so?			
                                     When light shows its image			
                                        Dark finds itself as a foe			

Details | Free verse | |

Trapped In A Swamp Of My Own Creation

My nighttime world
Brought on by dreams and nightmares
Subconscious fantasies 
Hidden away by the day’s light
I wander through it with no guide
No path to lead my way
Only dimly lit by a waning moon
A dark green swamp
Moss hanging from shaded Cyprus trees
Like the hair of an ancient hag
Destined to exist in this world
Murky brown water stands stagnant
Beneath a slowly shifting grey fog
Snakes droop from low lying branches
Blending into the foliage around them
Waiting for something to pass by
They hiss and snap
Issuing a warning to all who listen
I am the only one who hears
Maybe if I listen hard enough
I may find my way out when the sun rises
But I know that that cold moonlight
The light of the waning moon
Grey and cold
Lacking shadows or definition
Will once again trap me
Hold me in a world of my own creation
And my hope will die
And I’ll become part of my own subconscious fantasy
Never to again escape
Trapped in that dark green swamp
Swallowed by the hanging moss
And I will just simply cease to be
The question is
Does it matter to anyone but me?

Details | Free verse | |

Dark Vapor

Unsuccessful but enlightened – a good man,
And here I am… his biggest fan,

He had shoved life into his backpack till the back straps broke,
And then carried it like a briefcase, a determined man - no joke,

But a dark vapor came,
And the man changed,
And here I am… his biggest fan,

He splashed his thoughts on white walls with his wrists,
Clenched fists in an airtight chamber,
Red ink pens to white paper,

He’d told me there was no feeling greater,
A dark vapor,

An ice-cream cone in a child’s hand, 
Small bleached bones buried in sand,
And here I am… his biggest fan.

And as all good things must come to an end,
So too did my greatest friend,
Electric pulses ran down the length of him and then repeated,
A fire in his veins that left him defeated,
A dark vapor,

And I still am his biggest fan,

Because I too have painted my life in red ink on white walls,
And I too have buried bones in the sand as anyone can,
And I have no reason to be frightened,
Because I will be remembered as “unsuccessful but enlightened – a good man”,

I am not afraid to breathe in the dark vapor.
And he was right; there is no feeling greater.

Details | Quatrain | |

The Past

Alone, inside my wounded mind
seeking answers I must find
the past, it rears its ugly head
to keep me filled with pain and dread
always wanting me to bleed
to fill a dark and vile need.

Too many years it's kept its hold
and left me lost in dark so cold.
In desperate tones I plead and pray
I beg it "please, just go away"!
Within my weary soul I grieve
fearing it may never leave.

I've fought so hard to be set free
from pain trapped deep inside of me
with no parole, sentenced for life
with pain that cuts with razor knife.
Still to this very day I fight
to kill the dark and keep the light.

Though tears flow from this womans eyes
it's still the little girl who cries.
Again, she sings the same sad song
feeling what she feels is wrong.
Always regretting to reveal
to the world the pain I feel.

Details | Blank verse | |

Dark Veiled Eyes

Why can you see behind Black Eyes Is the veil too dark? Too dark for you to venture through This nether-world realm called my mind Burn away the trust like I Never was there Take away the hearts tossed in oil So slippery can you hold on? Fallen grace is to be found here Burned from the dark I was Frozen by the grace I was Loved by the sorrow I was Veiled my Eyes are You'll never try to find what's wrong The dark is too dark for you to venture through You are scared, you are frightened

Details | Free verse | |

those old dreams

After dawn has malingered through my window
I lay my swimming head down
and as I drown I dream of you.
I dream you walking towards me
and echo of things said
in dark explosive nights
which in the sober day are made real and whole,
I dream the poetry of the greats rising from your mouth
which I once knew
and silently I cry out and out
I do not love you.
I fear those around me 
bodies finally failing 50 hours after our excess began
hear me call out my denial drenched memories.
I wonder now if they watched 
my face when I dreamed
would they see yours?

I find myself in a new town
with a new place to hit the floor,
and yet still i run towards breaking point
in all the beautiful damagin ways I know.
I wonder when you are truly gone from me 
from my vessels 
from my veins
who will I blame
when my body finally caves once more.
when the boundaries crumble.
when the dark is no more my friend.
when the night fails me.
when once more I find solace only in savegery. 
when my heart expires.

You have not seen me dancing on the ceiling of the room.
You I fear will only remember my eyes dark
from those dark days
forgetting our blazing nights.
So I inhale, I swallow down somethings
I will not choke.
Forgive me if I don't eat
If I loathe sleep.
Its the painful normality 
I want to escape from.
Its things long gone I crave 
and cry for
when at last I hit the floor
and my own foolishness closes my eyes for me.

Details | Lyric | |

The Turning

A child casting his spells
He needs to win, he needs me to quell
The self-control that must now resist
The need for her, the need to exist

A world of lust breaking my mind
My heart would die to follow design
The scars alone could chart this abyss
But now alone, defining why to exist

A room of self reflecting my pain
To stand alone and resist all their games
Although it’s said this can not be truth
This sense of self is defining the proof

A universe within my dreams
Connecting life and counting the seeds
Reflecting stars reminding my soul
The seeds I count will be more able to grow

The shadows calling my name
The more I see, the more that it pains
The universe lighting my eyes
The more I see, the more that I find

And so I dream between dark and light
The answers come and patience ignites
The narrow path waiting for truth
The dark exists, this light is the proof

Details | Free verse | |


My life was truly that of a darkstar
A body devoid of light, of warmth, of energy.
I was resigned to a cold existence with little hope of regeneration.

Then, seemingly out of the darkness, you came,
With a light and energy that was felt even
As you entered the boundaries of my universe.

As you grew closer, your amazing energy ignited
The fire in the core of this dark star;
Warming my soil and fueling the source of my center.

When you near the boundaries of this dark star’s atmosphere,
My gravity becomes stronger, drawing your careening body closer,
Giving you cause to change your trajectory and alter the path of your own flight.

With such a small change in course,
A change in perspective simultaneously occurs;
Causing a new outlook, a new hope, and a new plan.
The fragility of the universe is always present in my mind.
Even as my world continues to evolve and renew,
The power of your core still strengthens me.

I will forever be grateful to the source of energy you provided this dark star.
Sending my newly regenerated body on a course toward my destiny.
Yet I wonder if the gravity you helped to strengthen might draw you closer or send you careening 

Time will pass and the universe will disclose the direction 
of this dark star’s path.
For now, I relish in the presence of the energy you provide.
I have become a new body, with new desires and new expectations.

The possibilities of this new star are endless.
		The effects on my universe immeasurable.
How lucky I have been to be in the path of your trajectory, for I will never be the same.

Details | Narrative | |

The Night of the Moon

It's the night of the moon
and though it's not in my sight.
The magic will be here soon.
The full moon takes the stage tonight.

I feel as low as the tide. 
The dark clouds set the tone.
Watching waves and sand collide.
I walk the beach all alone.

The clouds are fighting the sun.
They can't keep the bright light behind.
Sunset and beauty become one.
Doubt and hope crowd my mind.

Brilliant hues of orange,pink,and red
contrasting with clouds dark and gray
The sun paints a picture before bed
and then takes the painting away.

Splashing way out there in the sea.
Winking stars playfully laughing out loud.
I wonder,how this can be?
The night wont carry a cloud.

Where have all the clouds gone?
They've been plucked out of the sky.
The battle with the sun was been won.
I question not how, only why?

There's a bright glow in the west.
The curtain goes up for the show.
Dancing lights on the water are next.
Slowly rising the moon seems to grow.

Sometimes it's such a spiritual thing.
When nature reveals what it can truly do.
I can almost hear this moon sing.
So extravagant, it must be alive too.

My memory goes back to a time.
When the moon stole the show like this. 
I was with a girl that was so fine
and remembered that,that night we kissed.

But my memories are what had me down. 
I can't remember too many good.
There was the clouds at sundown
and suddenly I understood.

If I only kept good thoughts in my minds eye
and make all the bad ones just finish.
Maybe then my thoughts wont seem to magnify
what my memory can't seem to diminish.

Out with the bad thoughts in with the new. 
I'll fill my head with good memories only. 
But it seems that there are so few
that my thoughts might just get lonely.

That makes a smile come to my lips
and I wonder, did I just laugh out loud?
I watch enchanted as the moon slips
across the sky without a cloud.

My mood has changed I realize.
I knew I felt that pull.
Now I know hope never dies.
Hope lives in a moon this full.

Details | Blank verse | |


Depression is a lonely dark space where nothing flourishes.
It's dead and dark inside and out.
No room for thoughts or ideas.
No place for even a minute piece of sunlight.

It is an all encompassing feeling that eats at your heart and soul.
To those who have not yet wished for death, it is only a breath away.

Your head stays an empty abyss.
Your heart is as numb as a winter's day.
There's nothing there but an empty shell in which all emotions must remain 

For the truly depressed "silence is golden".
It is the ultimate statement for "all" and "last" to hear.

Details | Dramatic monologue | |


Press your thoughts to your mind’s eye.
Peer out through the blackness and grossness
Stuck to your skin like hot black tar
Burning your very being and leaving
It’s deep scars.

Your thoughts have betrayed you.
Focus hard now, for it’s time to think.
Veer back in painful realization and slam
The door on what you now must realize.

Panic strikes deep into your heart
And rips a gigantic hole in your selfishness
And you ache to take it all back inside,
To forget what you just seen like a bad

Voices outside speak the truth and drool
At the notion of your inner truth being revealed
Like a dirty secret.
It sits and taunts your every breath.
Your every word curses your very self-worth.

Murmurs at the backdoor of righteousness
Ooze into a plain color on a slab of coarse stone.
Marble perhaps, its beauty engrained in every 
Sweep of the Creators hand.
But you are not Marble.

Weak and transparent - the wind blows right
Through you and the sun burns your albino skin
You hid in the darkness behind your face.
Scratching your ugly sores that they created.
Murdering the thoughts that pervade your common sense.

Your closet overflows with bones of days gone by
And your true self  hangs dead from a rope binded by Pride.
A rope you created with your own hands.

You accept what you want to see and whip the
Truth back into its dark corner
Screaming and begging you to stop
It’s legs withered and its body old and worn
From years of beatings and abuse.

Truth will not tolerate the dark for long.
It needs the light to heal its wounds.

Think hard now.

Details | Blank verse | |

Another Silly Notion

I want an Andalusian woman.
Dark hair, dark eyes, dark skin.
One who looks beautiful in a summer dress
and has a Gypsy song in her heart.
All men dream of their ideal woman
and I'm sure most never actually find them.
Most of the time we find one who is the
complete opposite.
Compromises, always compromises. 
But I hear Lorca's guitar weeping
and the flamenco rhythms in the Mediterranean
air, coursing through my Mediterranean blood
along with every other silly notion I've had lately.

Details | Diminished Hexaverse | |

Because I am...

Because my day is as dark as my eyes.
Because my mug of coffee is always half full.
Because my hero hides in a dark place.
Because my God is as my hero.

Because my eyes are as dark as the lake.
Because I was born into a dark soiled country.
Because I will die and return to this soil.

Because my fathers heart is darker than mine.
Because my mother cannot find the light.

Because my inside is as beautiful as the surface

Because I am, who i am.

Details | Verse | |

Home Is Where The Heart Is

Where do you come from?

  I crossed parched deserts, climbed rugged mountains,
  gazed at steep canyons, ford a few fast raging streams,
  flew over dark storm clouds where eagles never dared,
  gusts blowing on my ears with each story they bared.

What place do you call home?

  I have been all over the world, either real or in my mind,
  giving way to this wanderlust, surrendering to the wind;
  I went to places where mythical goddesses once lived
  ere coming to a spot where the real God was revealed.

Are you from the Far East?

  When I was younger I saw the far corners of America
  and before I die I dream to be on safari in dark Africa;
  just  to behold the majestic Sphinx and the Pyramids
  sums up all the experiences much more than I need.

Man, you are not answering my questions!

  Oh yes, I heard you alright but you were not listening.

  Home, my friend, is not a boundary, locality or a place,
  you cannot find it on a map but on some stranger's face;
  home is a state of mind, anything that you want it to be,
  home is where the heart is is what this rover has to say.

Details | Lyric | |

Eternity in a Riddle

So this dark redeems me
All the pain burns my hatred away
And as the sun becomes nothing
So does my sight turn to dust and decay

For the lust I’ve been wanting
For the wanting that lusts for my life
I proclaim my deception
For deception to pull you inside

Eternity in a riddle
The paradoxes that plague every noise
Too alive for the lessons
But far too dead to believe there’s a choice

And ever realising
That the world can not take what I am
For if I was to end this
I would awake with the strength of the damned

So this dark redeems me
All the silence you hold will be mine
And as the moon becomes nothing
So do my crimes eclipse the horror I find

Details | I do not know? | |

Downward Trend

     Bleak city scenes
            by dark shadows
a cat runs
            into an alleyway
which winds its way
               between two 
grey stone apartment buildings
Tired eyes view a dark metropolis
     everyone who has a 
           is on the
way there
         the moon casts
its rays
           on the night people
  who (with eyes that pierce the darkness)
         seek out  the
light which is coming soon
      in the all - too - real

Details | Verse | |


in a dark place
a light finally shines
and the peace it brings
revitalizes me

like a full moon 
on a dark night
like a monsoon rain
or a sweet refrain

it is enough
it is finally enough
what you give me to keep
is enough for me

Details | Ballad | |


I step ashore 
I now know............ 
What is is all for 
To come this far so 

These people mingle, 
my thoughts tingle 
These spirit lights, 
change these dark nights 

This ethereal glow 
Emanates from the isle 
Known only to us so 
The ones chosen to be......................... 
The happy 

Dark glassy sea, 
protects me 
Those who live, 
those who forgive..................... 
Come to be 

Golden lives, 
step ashore 
They now know, 
what it is all for 
What the spirit contrives, 
golden lives 
Carried by golden dhow 

This golden dawn, 
new lives reborn 
The golden throng 
This is where they belong 

For the life now passed, 
the golden soul continues to last 
The spirit lights, 
that mingle 
Light up the dark nights, 
their thoughts tingle 

This happy place to be 
So far,far away, 
on the dark glassy sea 
Is much more than I can say, 
for the golden spirits mingle.................. 
and play 

Spirit world, 
my golden light unfurled 
Spirit light 
on an island 
So bright 

Details | Free verse | |

out of the box

ancient ancestor's fervently sought
a truth , neither to be traded or bought
to discover , uncover , recover the mold
a beginning , spinning , facing sarcasm cold

learned men had to cypher , code their belief
undaunted critisisms , they found no relief
from those of power , whom would have them cower
recant their statements , or destroy the tower
imprison the mind , the body , the soul
burn the remnants of ideas was their goal
instilling of ignorance , bathed with fear
washing of hands , without facing a mirror
deep down ,subconscious , dark ages grew
contained in the cauldrons of their faulty brew .

school of hard knock's , pandora's box
too many blocks within' that rock
corners have been turned , while bridges burn
rushing , oblivious , of the lessons to be learned
little white lie's swept under the rug
uncomfortable feelings give conscious a tug
deeper thoughts , become a shadowy bug
persistent visions of the hole that's dug

like a thundering rainstorm , dark clouds overhead
releasing it's fury , letting go instead
floodwaters , overflowing , bursting dams and levies
like a burden withheld , that's become too heavy

keeping it all locked up in that box
differing peace , at the end of that walk .

Details | Lyric | |

Counting into Dreams

Gently my thoughts find their places
Through the drums and past dark spaces
An over-thought of panicked races
I close my eyes and count their paces

Alleviations, inner changes
Congregating me in stages
Deprivation of my rages
I count their signs and see the sages

Lighting me with every wisdom
The universe becomes decision
And through my flowing I see visions
The dark and light seek out collision

Every dream that I can measure
Becomes a claim of evil pleasure
But every dream that I can treasure
Cleanses darkness through true weather

Into breaths of deeper meaning
There comes a place that I’m believing
Reaching into further dreaming
The love that fills me knows no deceiving
Even counting back, I’m never leaving

Details | Narrative | |

I Walked with the Reaper

One night I awoke to a dream
A figure of prominent terror hovered 
Over my bed and asked me
If I’d travel with him 
I joined him though my skin crawled
At every breath he heaved
Raspy and gurgling behind his dark tattered cloak.

I dared not look at him for fear he’d look back
Crippled over and cracking with every step.
I walked with him to a field
Laden with even laid stones
No names, just the stones.

He stood in a painful position I thought
And I wondered why he lingered at this spot
“Torment knows no names,” he said
And rose upright so high that it startled me
And my core felt penetrated as if frozen in ice

He was the Reaper I thought, 
He’s come for me.
He then lowered back down, and silence,
More hallowed then death itself,
Haunted my thoughts.

‘I’ve walked this road alone each night
For as long as I can remember,” he echoed
“You’re the first to come with me.”
I felt a sort of strange pity come over me
And I placed my hand on his shoulder
As we stood in the dark shadows.

Suddenly the sound of distant voices circled my head
Beautiful voices singing from a brilliant light.
“the dead don’t walk with the dead,” he said softly
“the Living do.”
As he finished his words, his cloak fell flat
And he was gone. A pile of rotting black cloth remained.

I awoke to a woman who was hollering out
“My child, I nearly hit you!”
I was standing in the night air
In the middle of a covered bridge.
The headlights so bright I couldn’t see past them.
She wrapped her coat around me and
Walked me to her car.
The coat she wrapped me in

Was a black cloak.

Details | Free verse | |

Slippin' Slowly

Dying in bits,
Pieces each day...
No matter what I try,
I don't know what to say...

"Reality" is a concept,
I find hard to believe,
Is there more to it?
Or do I self-deceive??

Slippin' slowly
Into another world,
Mists of time and place,
Confuse me so bad,
I don't know how to face...

The future is past?
Time is a joke?
The Universe is endless,
Matter wears a dark cloak?
Dark matter,, dark energy,
What is the truth?
Guess God is alone,
In his ability to know,
I don't think that ever,
Humanity will grow

To the point where the
Last question's been asked,
The last riddle solved,
The Universe and time,
Completely dissolved

I'm just one little man,
Facing the "now"
Elusively confused,
By why and the how...

Not for me to know,
Just to wonder the why,
Someday I will go,
My soul will then fly...

This is a matter of faith,
Not science concrete,
Someday I do hope,
God I will meet.

Details | I do not know? | |

Night Time

Night Time
Night Time 
I love the Night

It's Dark out
It's Dark out
I love the Dark

Dark Night 
Bright Night
I love the Night

It's Night time
It's Night time
A Wonderful Night.

Details | Free verse | |

Philosophical Phrases and Phases

The brooding nature of boredom,
The painful fear of panic,
The mysterious magic of wonder,
Of stories yet untold...

The rich joy of knowledge,
The power of the pen,
The pulsating passion of music
The dark, dark sting of loss...

The confusion of confusion,
The despair of deep dark doubt,
The searing jolt of betrayal,
The light lilt of lovely love,
The fantastic fact of faith,
The terror of the unknown,
The paralysis of indecision,
The fear of fateful failure
The joy of joyful giving,
The sweet  taste of tender sharing,
The almond bitterness of envy

Only a small sampling...
Of things we must endure
Remember one thing,
if no more...
You are what you are,
And it is what it is...
You can change it not...
Make the best of your existence...
Not that you have a choice...
But God is surely be with you,...
And he hears your poetic voice...

One more thing,
for you to consider,
To me too awesome
to ignore...
Your poet's words,
Will last through time ,
Your thoughts,
They will endure...
And your words will touch
other's hearts..
Of that you can be quite sure.

Details | Ballad | |


Shadows, flew 
across my heart 
Dark too 

Such dark beauty 
Such mystery 
Shadows too, 
in the heart 

Amidst the shadows 
A light grew 
A spark... 
A rose... 
That was me 

Spilling out 
Petals falling 
Colour calling, 
I heard it shout 

To travel 
so far... 
Mysteries of the heart 
Such dark beauty, 
becoming light 

The smokiness within 
The battle of light 
The battle of dark 
A curious whim 
A curious spark 

Light and shadows, 
flew across my heart 
Such beautiful things 
Cannot rest in the 
mysteries of the heart 

Details | Free verse | |


Stop the presses roll the presses stop the presses roll the presses stop the 
presses roll the presses stop the presses roll the presses man is just a 
murdered victum just an ad campaign gone wild just a circumstantial incidental 
mark in time a blood red smear in some dark alley way a thing to be uncovered 
and then covered over in the dark but wait it has not happened yet a man is 
moving in his day a man is writing all eye say he is still typing on his keyboard 
and watching all the words making sure this time that the spell check is on he is 
undercover of the day light and the darkness flees away he is me and he is eye a 
poet and a birthright an occidental gentleman turning time back into usage of 
forgiveness and some privileges. It is just a poem after all they say who reads it 
anyway who has the time who has the time to learn the way of GOD. In Peace a 
Poet is the one. I am only a statistic after all.

Details | I do not know? | |


Your friends have gone 
tears shed 
What have you done? 
Was it something you said? 

You have said goodbye 
This dark water to tread 
The friends you made cry 
Was it something you said? 

Where have you been? 
This dark water to tread 
Was it the things you had seen? 
Was it something you have said? 

Dark water still 
Dark deep 
Your tears begin to spill, 
your tears begin to seep 

These friends have left, 
family gone 
You feel bereft 
Dark waters to tread 
Was it something you said? 

This dark water, 
on a dark night 
Dark water to tread, 
all dread 

Dark water 
Salty tears that seep 
Dark water, 
fears you keep 

Dark water 
your friends have gone, 
everything lost 
What have you done? 
Still water you tread 
Was it something you said? 

Salty tears, 
on a salty sea 
all alone with your fears 
you decided this you see................. 


Details | I do not know? | |

Beginning and the End

I’m sitting back and letting days slip by
The window stares and shows me so much hate
My heart still fades as I resent its lies
I disappear as there’s nothing left to hide

Holding me away from hurting you
I could bring you pain and burn you up inside
There’s still a part of me I think is true
But if I looked I know I’d shoot you through

The dark in me has claimed another day
The things I see are begging me to stay
The lies I hear still tell me it’s ok
But to be free I’ll screw it all away

The light is false, I know because I saw
The space above is just a natural whore
Without the dark there’s no such thing as law
The light I see is a reaction and a door

I’m taking you apart
I’ll get inside your heart
I’ll bet you feel so smart
I’ve screwed your mind and taken you to the start

I’ve taken me apart
I am inside my heart
I am my work of art
I’ve screwed my mind and I must now restart

Details | Narrative | |

Gone, As With the Wind

It was dark and cold as he wandered the streets of Chicago
Strangers were the only people he saw, he had no friends
Searching nightly, he had never found her, the one he sought
He needed to find her, for without her, his destiny ends

Strangers were the only people he saw, he had no friends
He was new to the city, but felt welcomed, when their eyes met
Two in a crowd, for a moment, they shared a glance
A face of an angel, truly a face he would never forget

Searching nightly, he had never found her, the one he sought
For she wandered in to the crowd and was lost then from view
He ran, he stopped, he started again, searching everywhere
Until, as the sun had gone down, his spirit did, too

He needed to find her, for without her, his destiny ends
He feels in his heart, that the two of them were destined to be
Alas, he could not find her, in this big cold dark windy place
But he would never stop trying, else his heart shan’t be free

Details | I do not know? | |

Your Light

The light of the sun will shine down
Hiding all of those little frowns
The rainbow is painting your mask
Illusions are an every day task

The heat of the sun will delude
The greatest minds are its fruit
It helps you become your belief
Your sun is not my relief

I live in dark I can see
Your hate, pain and envy
I thought I just saw you die
In my eyes you’re just another lie

The minute that I step into light
It’s blinding, it’s far too bright
Stop me before I am dead
You’re pushing, killing instead

Please, show mercy on me
Controlling what wants to be free
Just because you cannot see
Doesn’t mean I cannot believe
You’ve killed me

I lived in dark and could see
Your hate, pain and envy
I know you have died
So many times, how much lies?
I crawl back into the dark
Your lies have just hit their mark
Darkness is now the thing that I crave
Anything else is just another grave
Lift me up and surprise
I now feel so high
The mask will fade from my face
I’m free now in every way
You keep trying to pull me from this
Why can’t I be with bliss?