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Sympathy Funny Poems | Funny Poems About Sympathy

These Sympathy Funny poems are examples of Funny poems about Sympathy. These are the best examples of Sympathy Funny poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

Details | Rhyme | |

A Good Appearance With A Bad Intention

My adored is here, Oh Vincent! Charming with your perfume's scent not minding if it costs just 50 cent. Wishing to lean on you and form a crescent on your well endowed body which is like an expensive present. Stealing a kiss from me is decent but pulling me back and forcefully keeping my legs bent; even with my resistance, you would not relent makes you a pathetic Dog 100 percent. And I am regretful of my time badly spent. I escaped, when you were a little complacent as you rudely smiled like a badly trained Adolescent. And all these while, I thought you were innocent. How dare you try to penetrate without passing through my consent? Now that the beast in you, you represent, the only thing I have to say to you is REPENT!


Details | Verse | |

Enigma's Calling

Extraordinary, I am 
Craving for unusual thoughts
Endless exploration without boundary
Understanding  the gift I shouldn't fought
 
Invisible drawings in my mind
Playing with the words in my head
My passion
The food of my soul
 
I feel so lucky
The random thoughts
A lifetime companion
A self esteem builder
A goal planner
Be my forever life saver
 
I write more
I talk less
I want to please
I chose to bore
 
What tickles me the most
Is to know what I'm for
Thinking is my love
When  my mind goes empty
That's when I hate
 
My day dreaming lust
Organizing things in my mind
Playing roles of simulation
Where images of art is my vision
And words of attitude is my heart


Details | Epitaph | |

Floating.....

Wish I could have taken better 
Care of my body... 
Wish they could have stopped 
the cancer sooner... 

I'm just a spirit now, 
Floating over my own funeral. 

If I had my way, I'd pick another church. 
At least one that spelled my name right 
On the obituary. 

I wonder if they knew, 
That I truly loved Sonya, 
but married Adele out of convenience. 

Wish I could have told my brother, Kenny 
I forgive him, maybe he wouldnt cry so hard. 
Wish I could tell Aunt May that hat is too big. 
I wonder if Tara knows the deacons 
Are looking up her dress. 

Im just a spirit now, 
Floating over my own funeral. 

I wonder if the choir knows 
How much I really hate that song... 
Hope they know the Pastor's lying. 
I was not that good of a man.. 

That suit is not the one I would have picked. 
My body looks so much smaller, 
and that make-up makes me look too light. 

Im just a spirit now, 
Floating over my own funeral. 
Free from pain, free from it all. 

Wonder if they know, 
In spite of my short time on this earth...
i truly enjoyed it.
I truly loved it all.


Details | Free verse | |

What doesn't kill You only makes you weak

I down poison and sleep for days
trying to take the heart ache away
I swallow rasorblades to take the headaches away
but nothing matters its always the same
what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger
liar liar pants on fire!!!!

Overdosed and dieing
survived it and now paying with liver damage and internal bleeding


The car crash of the drunk driver
how relaxing
nail biting aftermath
and another reason to go out and party
for the celebration
of the alcoholic
who just took the life of his best friend
I'm the victom
I'm the victom
I'm the victom he says
but low and behold the survivors in the other vehicle
stronger than ever
all crippled and in wheel chairs
know that
they should really thank the drunk driver and condemn
all the hippocrits who know nothing of survival

so here i am
wishing to be more strong
why bother to exercise
they surely have it all wrong
why pay attention to science any way
all those cliches can tell you about apples and sunshine
but we know what doesn't kill you makes you stronger
so i think I'll cut off my leg
go play in traffic
or fight the wars by doing too much drugs
the place inside the fire can tell you
what doesn't kill you will only make you strong

A second lease on life
a new found reason to get up and go
and find god and praise life
and all the things i should have done
and all the newfound glorious reasons to cry
why oh why oh why oh why
thank you lord thank you Jesus
thank you wars thank you liars thank you lies
thank you doctors thank you poets
thank you psychologists
thank you preachers for truly understanding an age old cliche
I'll peel off this apple to keep the doctor away throw out the core
and know
if it doesn't kill me
I'm probably just weak
and after all the rehabilitation and speach therapy i still don't feel like me



Details | Lyric | |

Dad

Dad is not perfect, but, a wonderful man;
He’s honored by his wife, daughter and son.

Whether a naughty girl or an angelic boy,
He’s ready to buy a gift or make a toy.

Dad is whom you want to be with,
When you’re down or you’re in need.

He is always there for you, giving hope;
And loses his temper when you’re in dope.

Dad was born, indeed, to make us laugh;
Especially, when he shares his funny stuff.

In one’s heart, he leaves his memories;
A true friend, a brother, a man of peace.

So this is what dad means to me;
Am I ready for this? Let me see.

Hmm, I’m thinking; nope, I pass.
I’m old, just 90. You boys don’t rush.



Details | I do not know? | |

Your Mistake

'Love is patient'
'Love is kind'
The thought of love
Can turn you blind.

But... Now we must
Take some steps
To verify those
Deep regrets.

The first problem you see
Was that. . .
He lied about
You being fat

That in turn 
Led ya to
Beleiving that
He 'accepted' you.

Mirrors were made
For a darn good reason
And thinking you are nothing special
Is high, high treason...

But no!
He's perfect
And no! He's kind
Seriouslly sister
You've lost your mind.

The recipe to love Is that
You have to love your self.
It's not about your facial features
Or the size of ya belt.

The man should be a rock to lean on
And not! A heartless swine.
So please next time. Do pick him wisely
Make sure he has a spine!


Details | I do not know? | |

The break up- Footle contest

Cold stares
heart tares


Details | Free verse | |

Conspiracy: Who Killed The Easter Bunny

A crowded table, all suspended in shock 
The sound of the shot dimming to a ‘knock’
Only silence, except for the marching clock
The weapon still smoking; an anonymous glock
WHO KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY?

Loud cries arise from the elongated table,
Jack Frost is shocked, the Tooth Fairy unable
To speak whilst Santa is checking the stable
For clues on the erstwhile maidservant Mable
WHO KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY?

They searched for hours, called in C.S.I,
Panic set in, would the children all cry?
Sandman confirmed the bunny had died
Batman suspected somebody had lied
WHO KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY?

Guests were quizzed, interrogations began
The mystery unfolded when Santa Claus ran,
Grabbing the pies, he tried escaping in a van
But was stopped in his tracks by superman
SANTA KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY!


Details | Haiku | |

Haikus About God: V

Omniscient guy
Yet he lets bad things happen
How can he exist?


Details | Limerick | |

remedy required

I ache from my nose to my knees; I sniffle and snuffle and wheeze. A small tot of rum might settle my tum, but what should I take for a sneeze? ~


Details | Terza Rima | |

A FEROCIOUS LION

Anyone who thought that I follishly picked a rabbit, a cat,
a sheep, a bird or frog as an animal for my impersonating:
must have the wrong assumption...it would be a big insult!


How would anyone see me becoming one of those?
Has anyone thought of me as a ferocious lion instead?
I would be the king of the jungle, but it could get worse!


I will be demanding obedience and loyalty from every small and big animal
that I have recorded in this book and as their leader I'll be just and pliant,
but wouldn't they envy me for my pretty lioness queen so gentle and beautiful?


Only lions have the ability to lead, solving the issues of justice, equality and fairness;
others may not seek the powerful ivory scepter I'll be holding in my claws,
and from this throne made of straw...they'll admire my sovereignty and mighteness!


Who's laughing in the noisy trees, where lots of monkees devour ripe bananas?
Who's shaking the brenches to make them fall and and land where I stand?
Don't they see the crown I'm wearing which intimitates the elephants and giraffes?


Nobody should be afraid of a docile lion that would turn ferocious...
if the jealous ones continued to ignore me and flashed looks of contention,
and although I am a self-appointed king, I can be kind, not atrocious!


Entered in Kristen Bruni's contest,
" If I Was Animal What Would I Be? "
written by Andrew Crisci


Details | Lyric | |

The Unhappy Moth

She chose a red scarf. The most red 
of them all.
Of a dark red, a sweet and thick red color,
just as wine.

She carved from the red scarf
from the middle
to the size of a Martini glass.

Then she carved one more glass,
and she kept carving 
till she fell asleep.

Yesterday
she saw her Beloved Moth 
flirting with a Younger Moth, 
carving together from a sweater
while she was getting busy,
carving in the shelves.

The Unhappy Moth drank lots of wine
woolen wine, 
last night.
She drank lots, too much
for a Moth.
The Unhappy Moth got drunk
and fell asleep
on the red scarf,
unhidden
with a heart filled with peace.

She was not afraid no more. 
Now she could be seen easily,
laying on the scarf
and easily crushed.

The Unhappy Moth was not 
afraid of death no more,
at least, now she knew 
how wonderful the red scarfs are
and that they taste
like red wine.


Details | I do not know? | |

Softer Toilet Paper

In this bathroom of Dr. Heath's,
The tissues so tough you grit your teeth.

No soft toilet paper anywhere to be found,
By the time you get through, how does Charmin sound?

You wipe with sandpaper til you bleed,
Soft toilet paper your bottom will need.

In this kit, relief  you will find
From toilet that is much more kind!


Details | Ballad | |

Always Remember Tooth Paste

Tears for fears.
Tears throughout the years.
Tears that fallen from my peers.
A tear so sincere that will shred us from this dreadful fear.
That someday we all will die.
But have u gotten a slice of that pie.
A pie so delicious u can almost taste.
That u cant let it go to waste.
Maybe next time I'll remember tooth paste.


Details | McWhirtle | |

Romeo the Great Lover


I’m really amazed by 
Romeo the great lover 
who boasted his greatness
of loving my friend Tess.

Oh, Gee! How hard it is 
for him to display his trademark
of love, for her 
in the presence of his wife.




Details | I do not know? | |

FEAR!!!!!

I RUN from FEAR.

I HUNT for FEAR.

I HIDE in FEAR.

I FIGHT cause of FEAR.

I'm FAR from you.

I'm SCARED cause of you.

You're the FEAR that I HUNT.

You're the FEAR that I FIGHT.

You're the FEAR that SCARED me for LIFE.

*Comment if you have any thought and if you like it. oh and some of the poems i write arn't 
always my feelings. their some times just to get through other people so they can have 
something to read that just fit's them.*

                                              -Angel4eva23


Details | Ode | |

The Dime

There was once upon a time, 
Unexpectedly, a very small dime. 
He did not do much of anything,
Apart from gazing. 
He just stared longingly at the sky, 
Counting the clouds that drifted by. 

Dear old Dime, not very bright,
He did not shine, not a ray of light. 
Dark and rusty, 
Old and dirty.
Everyone did not care, 
Though they could use him and buy a bear. 

They did not want to touch, 
This old thing of such. 
They did not want to feel. 
That sick disgusting bill. 
He was old, rusty and dim,
But he hated the way man treated him.


Details | Rhyme | |

SPECIAL TEDDY BEAR

this magical toy was handed down to me,
by no other but my family.
yet to be recognized and told,
never to be sold.
in first sight it was mystical,
it never likes a brat.
so to it's meaning;
you shouldn't always be mean,
show that you are not easily upset,
and is always is a fair kid.
it could protect you,
will always be by your side.
calm you in the storm,
brave you through a fight.
will be there for you through thick and thin,
no matter how your destiny ends.


Details | Rhyme | |

A PROMISE THAT DWINDLES WITH TIME

Politicians will do anything to get elected on this coming November second:
from fierce attacks on integrity, sensitivity, character and morality...
and lie they will to win at the polls, promising all streets of glittering gold;
good folks, before you choose those candidates, be aware of reality. 



Every media is swamped with ads with messages that convicinvigly say,
" I approve of this message." Should we endorse and trust them?
The Mayor wants to be the Governor, and the Governor President...
anyone can run for any of these prestigious offices on that lucky day.



In their vibrant words truly convincing...all you hear is changes for the better:
less taxes, more jobs, drug-free streets, pristine cities and minimal crime,
but how can they afford all these expenses, if not on the hard-working tax-payer? 
If they constantly swear: their promise is a promise that dwindles with time.



Details | Cowboy | |

guitar band dementia

camera three is having 
an existential crisis; 
his long languid lens 
has suffered in silence, 
an impotent shard of 
quixotic resistance, 
for his vision won’t 
focus on faecal injustice, 

camera three is having 
an existential crisis; 
mascots, despots, 
or other devices,
just won’t solve the problem,
or even negate, 
this delicate time 
in his delicate state,

camera three is having 
an existential crisis; 
Osiris, Anubis, Oasis and Isis, 
have all shed the skin of 
guitar band dementia, 
wheeling out wisdom 
for the fear of inertia,
camera three is having 
an existential crisis…


Details | Rhyme | |

Will you ever be a poet

Did you ever have a lover
with long red hair?
For long red hair
seems too unfair.

Did you ever have a lover
and then another lover?
For there's added gain
if you feel no pain.

Did you ever have a lover
who loved your eyes
and never ever lied,
and let you cry?
Whatever was the trouble.

You'll never have a lover.
if you have no time for others
for love needs care,
say,what is here.

Here and there are many lovely people
who live with their lives with scruples;
if you're scruple free,
then let it be.

Oh,let it be is fine,
Except for the divine.
I want to be involved
For I can't please all the folk,
Who touch me with their talk.
My heart has melted down...
and now I've grown a world
completely on my own.

Were you ever quite alone
Like a toad under a stone?
Did you ever hear a groan
as you wrote your poem?

For you'll never write a poem
that makes me laugh..
Because my feet are in the shower
but my body's in the bath.
My head is on the shelf...
and I've lost all of my teeth...
Yet you will love me
Evermore.
What allure!
so clear..

Evermore and evermore
You'll be standing on the shore
Watching the horizon,
wondering what she lies on.

Oh,you'll never be a poet,
Unless you learn your notes..
They take you to the limit.....
Love.whatever is it?

Evermore ,evermore...
The words seem like a roar...
I love your heart's deep core.
Ever more and ever more.


Details | Rhyme | |

Poetry About Poetry

Shades of color bounce within
Singing their hues dancing in place
Vivid lines colored outside
Rules broken with empty space
A midnights dream heard and seen
Gleaming from the twinkle of a eye
Wings touched flown and plucked
Gliding like a bird up in the sky
Wishes from pennies thrown into tears
The reservoir over flowing with pigments of pain
Drowning from the shadows 
The flood paints the day
Words speak volumes of silence hidden
Their sounds blind to what they see
Mirrors of nouns and verbs 
Their meaning and secrets lost at sea
Emotions ruled by laws of language
Spelled in boxes of glass
Melted from sands inside
That voices strangle to grasp


Details | Free verse | |

Down And Out Haiku Slam

<                                          whispers of the wind .........
                                            speak to enchanted sea .........
                                            bp ........  going down


Details | Narrative | |

Creature

Observing. 
Frozen in time,
captivated by this enormous being,
the size of a small car.

Pondering, 
his every move.
The way he used his hands;
so child-like.
With all the consciousness of the world, 
and graceless coordination.

Aware.
of the visitors,
as they briefly called out for his attention.
Only for a moment,
then they were gone.

Untamed,
in an orderly sham. 
He sat there,
in his dark cave.
As if he was waiting for the light to find him.

Perched,
on a boulder, 
squatting, and primitive.
Drawing in the dirt with one hand. 
Swatting a fly with the other.

Surreal,
His nature,
as he rushed to consume his food.
The females hovered behind him,
watching intently, 
like me.
His movement mechanic.
His presence powerful.
He was the king of his domain.

Studying, 
his magnificence, I watched.
How smart was he?
Could he feel my presence? 
Engulfed in the very essence of all that was him, 
I watched. 

Wondering, 
how he felt, I watched.
Did he think he was still in the womb of Mother Nature?
Or, did he know the iron bars which embrace him now?

Then 
it happened;
our eyes met.
He noticed my presence.
His gaze intimidated me, 
But I did not look away.
He approached me.
I felt his eyes inspecting my soul.
A chill ran down my back,
I turned behind me,
only to find no other presence there.
When I turned back, 
we were face to face.
Separated by the sham,
And a two inch piece of glass.
Just me and him,
the two of us,
and the females hovering behind him.

Wise,
His old eyes spoke to me,
They said 
“I am like you. 
I love, I feel, I hurt.
I am, like you.”

Sympathetic,
I put my hand on the glass
and with all the 
consciousness of the world,
he did the same.
With tears in my eyes,
I smiled.

Then, he pooped in his other hand
and wiped it on the glass.
This was a sign of endearment.
I laughed out loud.
And I swear,
He smiled back.


Details | Ballad | |

Woods, great place to hide from bullies

Beneath the soil lay our roots
Multi-legged insects walking on moss
Working hard to get the fruits
Like lost souls running to the cross
Or hungry new army recruits
With no care of profit or loss

We are the bugs
Commission on narcotic drugs
Watch as we steal the rain
Plants are ruining our brain

We feast together in the swamp
The spiders just want to push us around
They see us and want to stomp
We hide under the ground
I’m here, no fear of the chomp
It’s our other way around

We are the bugs
Commission on narcotic drugs
Watch as we steal the rain
Plants are ruining our brain

One day I hope it will change
The flower tell us one day
Not to far gone to rearrange
Apex of the sun’s way
Move to the balkan mountain range
Rather than be part of the buffet

We are the bugs
Commission on narcotic drugs
Watch as we steal the rain
Plants are ruining our brain