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Star Funny Poems | Funny Poems About Star

These Star Funny poems are examples of Funny poems about Star. These are the best examples of Star Funny poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

Details | Narrative | |

My Cousin's Wedding

My cousin shared her wishes and dreams, On our star gazing night, she whispered them so sweet As a shooting star glided down from the sky, She said, I wish ….. I wish…. all I wish are these tonight Someday, I will marry a smart, rich and handsome guy And have a grandiose banquet on my nuptial rite We’ll be dancing like a lovely prince and princess , With all my wedding sponsors on their best suits and dresses All in pink ,that’s the motif I will surely request. She kept into her dreams as several years passed by, Still searching for her prince charming who’s hard to find Unconsciously going beyond the age to give birth to a child, In a hurry at age of seventy, she took a rich ninety years old guy. The wedding was held after a day or two, The guy seated on his wheelchair with rheumatism on his toe She headed slowly at the alter to accept his shaking hands, Two nurses followed, so with sponsors dressed up in printed brown. The highlight of the wedding rite started at once, They held tightly with a nebulizers on the other hands, But the words of oath, they took time to pronounce False teeth were both misplaced and nowhere to be found. Reception followed grandiosely in the guy’s mansion, I saw many old men and women still eager to dance on the floor, With hunched back, shaking knees, they twisted rock and roll Then, sweet music played and my cousin danced with her groom. But, we all wondered how did he stand alone? He’s so heavy , I knew my cousin couldn’t help him at all, With our great surprise, his nurse was at his side like his crutch Everyone thought , he’s really a smart guy! Was he not? Then, everyone followed them so happily on the spacious hall, And in trio, they held each other so tight and moved like a fool.
Written: Sept. 15, 2012 First Place Contest: My Cousin's Wedding (funny poem) Contest Judged: 9/30/2012 Poet Sponsor: Joann Grisetti


Details | Limerick | |

Guiding Star O'er Washington

I pray a  bright star will shine in the air

    O'er Washington to guide some wise men there

        Bringing gifts of commonsense

            And harmony to dispense

                To a nation that is in disrepair

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved


Details | Limerick | |

Strumpet Meets Star Wars

For trick or treating Stella the strumpet

Got dressed up as a butterscotch crumpet

     Caught his eye – Jabba the Hutt

     He had hunger pangs in his gut

No more strumpet; Hutt plays "Taps" on trumpet


*For John Freeman's Halloween Limericks Contest. ©

If you haven't seen Star Wars, you can see an image of Jabba the Hutt at:

http://www.google.com/imgres?
imgurl=http://almostdorothy.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/jabba-the-hut-1-
749957.jpg&imgrefurl=http://almostdorothy.wordpress.com/2010/02/16/kristine-
snodgrass-an-interview-with-a-fledgling-
starlet/&h=425&w=351&sz=44&tbnid=ydiaMK997cAQVM:&tbnh=126&tbnw=104&prev
=/images%3Fq%3Djabba%2Bthe%
2Bhut&zoom=1&q=jabba+the+hut&hl=en&usg=__vXVHk5so6VdAvMm6AFFu5s1vark=
&sa=X&ei=ssnJTL2DEIGC8gamr-jsAQ&sqi=2&ved=0CCYQ9QEwAQ


Details | Bio | |

Solitude: To Yoda, An Ode

Green bark a prism creates,
Feel the pull of earth, you must.

Rotates, a slime of endless hates,
Can hold me not, this world’s crust.

Friendship’s ties, isolation Deflates,
Succumbs, my spaceship, to bitter rust.

Mist, my soul forever permeates,
Lift-off, booms the rocket’s thrust.

My spirit when light returns, elates,
Swamps swell, swallowed hope’s swirling dust.

Trapped, I am, until student from fate
Arrives to learn; Cloud City or bust.


Details | Limerick | |

Star Wars Limericks

I write Star Wars limericks with aplomb.
'Cuz Star Wars is simply the bomb!
But they don't appear
On this nice website here,
They're at Starwarslimericks dot blogspot dot com!

No special effects there, I'm sorry.
A few pictures but nothing too gory.
I start at the beginning
And I keep on spinning
Retelling the whole Star Wars story!


Details | Ballade | |

The archer of laughter Sagittarius

The Archer of laughter
[Sagittarius]

He needs to know; not trivia
But all those deeper things
Needs a higher education
He wants his life to bring
All the answers big and vast
He wants to travel too
Cause he has heaps of energy
He loves to do things new.

He cannot handle boredom
He must be on the go
If not in the physical
Then he will have to know
Everything about anything
He’s a philosopher, this too
He loves to have his high ideals
And he’ll always say what’s true.

But most of all he loves to laugh
To him life be a game
He doesn’t do traditional
And he don’t like things the same
He can be over bearing
But you’ll like him anyway
Though he will really pee you off
When he has too much to say.

1 August 2013 @ 0727hrs.


Details | Free verse | |

Jabba Dabba Doooo -- Star Wars--

Jabba the Hutt has a spur up his butt that makes him as mean as a wasp If you stop for a look, at that glutton of glop, his looks will not help him a lot! His rotten demeaner, gave Vadar the radar, to hide out in deep outer-space Hutt's face and his figure could fracture a mirror ...and the glass of a whole universe! There are millions of creatures, with much better features, that Jabba can never embrace! Jabba is gruesome, a big gooey nuisance! He looks like a big wad of gum! He grossed out Chewbacca....... who likes his tobacco,.....(this may be a slip of a tongue)...., But... a wad of his chew, missed the spittoon, and hit Jabba, in his hut, with a zoom !
To view this unsightly, gruesome character: _https://www.google.com/search?q=Jabba+the+Hutt&rls=com.microsoft:en-US:IE-Address&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=sU4dUpjQG4HViwK1kYCoDQ&ved=0CEAQsAQ&biw=1920&bih=897 _____________________________________________ For P.D.'s Star Wars Contest: By Carrie Richards 8/27/13 Star Wars Rules !


Details | Light Poetry | |

More Somewhat Twisted Thoughts of the Day

I made a wish upon a star and really got burned
I made a wish upon a star and left Madonna breathless
I hitched my wagon to a star but forgot my spacesuit
The stars in my eyes turned out to be black holes

I couldn’t rise to the occasion so I took some Viagra
Did Harvey Wall Banger? Nope, Willy-Nilly slapped him silly
I once had sex on a golf course but wasn’t up to par and got penalized three strokes
A sex therapist counseled a maggot couple to make love in Earnest

I decided to take a brisk walk but there was this plank…
I WALKED that plank but they drained the pool so I cracked up
I walked the line and it was a very thin line (A very fine line though)
I walked the straight and narrow and had to stop for directions

I made a molehill out of a mountain and the EPA was NOT amused
I made another molehill out of a mountain and the CLIMBERS were not amused
I made ANOTHER mole hill out of a mountain but some mole dug up some dirt on me
I was shamed when the scandal was published in The Holey-Moley Enquirer
So I dug up some dirt on THEM and completely ruined my manicure…

If life is a rat race, God needs to set out some traps
Life was a bowl of cherries til I cracked my tooth on a pit
Speaking of pits, I escaped The Pit and the Pendulum but (Oh, rats)
Speaking of rodents, three-blind-mice ran into a herd of stampeding lemmings and quickly took the plunge…


Details | Sonnet | |

Topping The Star Charts

Voyager 1’s “The Sounds Of Earth”

Eleven billion miles from the sun
a record, golden when it left these parts,
a runaway hit on Voyager One,
at Ophiuchus, sure to top the charts,
will introduce Mozart to other stars,
not to mention Berry’s “Johnny B. Goode”.
The knock-offs sold in alien bazaars
will knock their socks off or at least it should
make them extend their eyestalks in surprise.
They’ll soon begin to learn to sing along
to whales recorded and the baby’s cries —
adepts might even master Earth’s birdsong.
Should Beethoven not prove to be their fave,
Then Guan PingHu’s GuQin could be their rave.


Details | Limerick | |

Hedgehog - adult

I ONCE MET A MAN IN PORN WHO’S TOOL WAS BIGGER THAN CORN NO TWITTER NOR BLOG THEY CALLED HIM HEDGEHOG HE HUFFED PUFFED AND BLEW HIS OWN HORN


Details | I do not know? | |

The Porn Star Prayer

Lord,
We do give thee thanks for the abundance
That is ours in glorious nudity
Even though some of it is saline
And some with silicon
Bless each and every one
~~~
Tell your mind what your body 
already knows
~~
Understand this,
They wanna be you, they wanna be just like you
Because right now, you are the sexiest
Woman on God’s green Earth 

Amen
?

NOTE: This piece is NOT about pornography, it is a satire, a humorous jab at 
the Industry
Please enjoy with this in mind or skip over it completely Thank you


Details | Rhyme | |

Wishing Star/Candy Bar

If you want to lose some weight
Here's some advice you may want to take

If you wish upon a star
While you eat a candy bar
Very soon you will see
You can't wish away those calories

A healthy diet and exercise plan
Can help you more than  wishing can
So, while you wish upon that star
Throw away the candy bar


Details | I do not know? | |

Five star restaurant

(This is a fictional poem)

My arms, legs and ribs have been broken and I'm wearing a neck collar.
It happened when I went to a five star restaurant and was charged three hundred 
dollars.
All my wife and I had were a couple of steaks.
When i told the owner that I didn't have enough money, a lot of bones started to 
break.
He dumped a pot of linguini and clams over my head and then jabbed me in the 
nuts with a fork.
He burned my hands on his stove and I started crying like a little dork.
He started beating me and he wouldn't quit.
He beat me so hard that it made me ####.
You may be laughing at me, you may think it's funny.
But you won't find it so amusing if you ever go to that restaurant without enough 
money.


Details | I do not know? | |

Voices in the wind

    A tear drop falling into space I hear you voice and I go crazy. It's something I 
can't explain. Maybe it's someone that sounds like you, But I can hear it and I know that 
it's you. At least that's what my mind tells me. I get all nervous and look your way, 
maybe this is a mistake because I could deal with that. I want you so much and then I 
don't want to see you again because I don't want to deal with it. Isn't that smart? I 
want you with my body and soul but then my soul plays tricks and I just want to let you 
go. I can't feel like this, this isn't natural. I wanted all of you and now i'm afraid. 
What if you did suddenly appear out of thin air and walk right over to me. I wouldn't 
know what to say I would be completely star struck, your now a star but in my heart you 
make me weak to my knees and I can't stop. Shivering, stuttering being around you can get 
me that way. Maybe it's not meant to be. Honestly please, I don't want to be that nervous 
wreck girl see what you do to me. I can't hold on and I can let go but then again this is 
me and as I hear you voice in the wind I faint.


Details | I do not know? | |

So fly

How do I describe  sun, moon,stars
In  the sky
 I saw shooting star pass by ,
I wonder why 
it was so high
I want to touch the sky,
every
 time a shooting star pass by
I often dream that I can fly
Souring through the sky ,
bye
Up up and away
That what always say
Each and other night and day
My boo  said can I fly too babE-Y
I said come lets go lady
Remember not to close your  eyes
 We are On our way
To the top
Then I wake up when the night drop
The day bring day dream though
As I am munching on that toast
Then out the door 
I go,
no flying though