Shawn and Shauna fell deeply in love
And were on their way to be wed
When a car, on that day, took their lives straight away
As both of their bodies, lie dead
But their spirits were both drawn to heaven
As they stood, in front of the gates
Saint Peter was there, at the top of the stairs
When Shawn hollered loudly “Just Wait"
Now Peter looked puzzled, at Shawn
And said "This is no time to tarry "
Shawn spoke again, and refused to go in
Without being properly married
Saint Peter replied very softly
"We don't do that kind of thing here
But if you're willing to wait,
“I’ll see if I can, get it cleared”
Three months went by, while they waited
Saint Peter, show up with a Priest
"I know it was slow, But I want you to know
You’ll be married Forever at least"
As the wedding was getting started
Shawn asked a question, with doubt
What happens here in heaven
“If this marriage just doesn’t work out”
A silent filled up the heavens
Saint Peter, was shaking his head
And once he regained his composure
This is what Saint Peter said
“It took Three Months to find a Priest
In this Heavenly Foyer
How long do you think, I’ll take for me
Up here, to find you a Lawyer ?”
Copyright © Jerry T Curtis | Year Posted 2014
May we always address dis-complacency, the vacancy,
And remove all opposes, to our roses,............................................................(Acts 18:4-6)
Here at Poetry Soup, completing love’s 100% loop, in our soup,
For an authentic rose, from God it grows, always knows,
It’s own heart, from which it grows,
For authenticity’s, dis-complacency
Displaces a rose, from which it grows, then only heaven knows,
A rose, from which it grows,
Then it tis the mind’s dis-complacency, from it’s own heart,
Then does it’s part, hid from it’s own heart,
Redresses the rose, then rose begin an oppose,
To it’s heart, from which it grows,......................................(II Thes.2:3-5) Ego mind persona
A displaced rose, is still a rose,
By it’s own authenticity, it still grows,
As the heart, still does it’s part, from the very start,
For it tis the mind, lost in it’s wilderness time, must realign,
With beginning of time, love of heart’s kind,
For it tis, redressing of mind, with heart’s beginning of time,
That undresses the rose, from it’s dress of the oppose,..........................(II Timothy 2:24-25)
For a rose, is still a rose, from whence it grows,
Not death’s oppose,
Like a tree, grows from inside itself, you see,
From an higher intelligence, to be,
That being, from it’s own heart, it’s love of start,
Like a dog, is a dog, not a hog,
Tis it’s central intelligent being, does it’s seeing,
Not it’s bureaucracy of fleas, hidden in it’s leaves,
Nor living in the hairs of your scalp,- Yeeeeeap!
Taking their ease, if you please,
As a nation, we have bureaucratic fleas, living in our leaves,
The fleas are in control, should a flea be so bold,
To tell the truth, tis growing old,
Should a parasite raise our taxes, should the parasites waxes us,
In our town hall meetings, try to ignore our pleadings,
And begin their elite minded proceedings,
By saying we are criminals, and it they are the emeralds,
Tis our freedom of speech, being bleached, under siege,
Should not even a dog own his own fleas, guys pleeeeease!
Our government is not a party to our rose,
They are opposed, to our rose, the fleas that grows,
From the power of our rose,
In our leaves, if you please,
A parasite, out of sight, must take flight,
Tis their complexity, the hex, no flex, too complex,
Will bring our nation to it’s knees, so please,
Use your voice, of choice,
Our fleas have become to numerous, to humor us,
Not a plus, but like a rust,
Our fleas in charge of us!!
Copyright © john freeman | Year Posted 2009
I stand naked by the mirror
Looking at myself
I look like ummm
Something off a dusty shelf
My ribs stick out
You could play them like a harp
And my eyes bulge out my head
Like a half squeezed Chihuahua pup
My legs they call them lucky
They like two fighting swords
I have the knack of amusing people
With them I even won awards
Now my wife is a total contrast
She’s short, fat and round
It takes me three hours to spread the fake tan
But she still comes out unevenly browned
Just the other day I thought
She threw the duvet over me
But when I opened one eye
I saw it was a crusty bikini
I love to watch her dressing
It makes me shake at the knees
I feel like grabbing a handful of ripples
And give them a gentle squeeze
Driving the car is a challenge
Her ripples stop me changing the gear
And when we walk down the street
We look like a shield with a skinny spear
But to her I’m her half finished pepperoni
To me she’s my fluffy bread bun
We always do things together
I’m telling you, we have so much fun
And now I would like to announce
The arrival of baby number seven
We may seem like the oddest couple
But it’s a match made in heaven.
Copyright © Sidney Hall Mad Poet | Year Posted 2010
His lovely wife is named Heaven
She scolds him seventy times seven
Yet, Big Joe just never really cared
In Heaven he lives happily, hearing impaired!
Stacey Brown 2-6-14
Dr. Ram Mehta contest
Husbands are in heaven
whose wives scold not
Copyright © Stacey Brown | Year Posted 2014
He starts singing songs of Ireland and we are home in a jiffy
"What's a jiffy," my mother wonders
"Guess where we went Granny?"
"I don't know but I have a feeling you are gonna tell me," answers my grandmother
"And Don't call me Granny!"
"We went to church so Poppy could ask secret questions."
"The priest gave Poppy a shot and a beer and Poppy sent me next store and he gave me money for taffy."
"He told me not to tell anyone especially you about the priest cause it's only for the priests ears."
"He said God would take away taffy and I'd never get another goodie and God would strike me dead if I told."
"So I can't tell anyone."
"He did," and she starts yelling and grabs a weapon,"what kind of idiot would be scaring a little child?"
Granny is standing on Poppy's toes and and asking him questions of where he'd been and getting a sniff of his breath
"So what did you tell the priest and him giving you consolation and a shot and beer."
"That little rat ," and thinks about the money for candy
Later, Granny is chasing Poppy with that big iron frying pan and poppy running and singing
"In Heaven they have no beer, that's why we drink it here."
"You damn fool I'm gonna bust you in the head, "and throws the pan at his head
Cousin Francis has bill collectors come to the house looking for him
Granny was four foot seven inches and she starts kicking him in the shin
My Mother grabs his Dick Tracy hat and she jumps on it and flattens it
I ask my mom where I was when this happened and she pauses
" You were in Heaven Patrick waiting with your brother!"
The truancy officers bang on the door and want to know where Uncle Charles is
Granny shrugs and says, "He is upstairs and the sound of the window going up sounds
They all run upstairs and see Uncle sliding down the tree and running as fast as his
seven year legs can move
He comes home later that evening holding a goose under his arm
And Poppy has a soft-boiled goose egg for breakfast every morning
I ask Uncle what happened to that goose and He said,"one day he came home and
they had chicken for dinner."
And Poppy was gone to heaven to get me and my brother ready Mom says
And Granny sits my brother and me on her lap and says,"you two knuckleheads listen up."
"This is very important so don't forget it."
"Treat people the way you want to be treated, because you never know who is going to hand you your last glass of water"
Copyright © Patrick Cornwall | Year Posted 2012
Yet he lets bad things happen
How can he exist?
Copyright © Dan Keir | Year Posted 2013
Please move it on sir
you are holding up the line
Could you repeat that? Oh, yeah!
See that ‘Been-There-Done-That’ sign?
Copyright © Tim Ryerson | Year Posted 2014
im livin in a world, where all eyes on me.
trying to curve my own route.
but route 66 keeps finding its way to me.
ive been plenty sick, in all the events layed before me.
even when i reflect to my lowest points
i dont regret any of the choices
That I’ve deployed in my era
A lot of it by error, but hey
We live in hell conditions and there ain’t no air condition
Or any guidelines when life throws you in the sidelines
But when hindsight twenty twenty hits
You’ll begin to understand life’s a bunch of equations and you in the mix of it
An you’ll have to think twice, before running into a situation and becoming the best of it
it’s what got me here, it’s what got us here
Ran with my thoughts blazing up to her place and
Guess what happened next
She opened up heaven’s gate
And just before late I slipped out
I’m a Grown ass man
Doin his thing, waitin to blow up like an old land mine
In doin what he drools over
But time after time
Something decides to creep up and cover the light
Lost my way
Then I revoked to ever know, I ever thought that way
But in the in between time, that in the mean time
Spent a lot of time
Gettin pissed off just to medicate and lift off
Don’t need Don Perion to sip off
Already had my way with the bottle
Even thought to get back with the trouble and rejoin the hustle
That’s just what happens to a man who really knows his old ways
Whos tired of making ends meet and ponders getting back to the streets.
Memory sets in and he remembers an O.G. saying
No matter how tall your pockets stand when you ball
Eventually times gonna make you fall
And I as I pull myself together
I don’t wanna end up like the twin towers rubble
I mean no offence to nine eleven but at that time I probably could have used a reverend
But all that’s irrelevant now
because i live with a different perspective now
there you go you made it to the end :-) comment if you like, constructive criticism wanted as well.
Copyright © pat roswell | Year Posted 2013
Dancing with the devil
Like I never danced before
Doing the fiery tango
On a fire flaming floor
In the crook of his arm
Our hips pressed together
Curving me round and round
Like I'm a weightless feather
Our feet move to Milonga
While forsaken souls watch
White cheek pressed to red cheek
His breath smells of age old scotch
My foot darts between his shoes
A fancy leg twist around his calf
Capturing the heat and passion
While trying not to hysterically laugh
If I can dance to perfection
Ironically I'll get to leave
Angels give me strength
And let my soul win reprieve
For I was meant to dance
In paradise on a white cloud
Sent to hell for dancing the tango
In Heaven only waltzes are allowed
Copyright © Cecilia Macfarlane | Year Posted 2013
My girlfriend’s love never ceases
My girlfriend loves me to pieces
My girlfriend takes away my breath
My girlfriend just loves me to death
Too young to be passing so soon
(Services will be held at noon)
For: Poetess Darkly's contest
Copyright © Tim Ryerson | Year Posted 2014
it seems like an eternity
since ive seen ur smile
the fact that uve been gone
still has me in deep denial
a lot of stuff has happened
since ur smile left this earth
gatherings, eagles losing, parties
life changes and brooklyns birth
a lot of people miss u greatly
n think about u everyday
our last picture together
on my dresser it will stay
ur deep voice, ur humor, ur kindness
is what i tend to miss the most
ur passing forever broke my heart
but our memories i hold close
i must admit, i did hit rock bottom
drugs n alcohol i used to cope
i took ur passing very hard
i started to give up hope
but i looked into brooklyns eyes
n caught a glimpse of u
u probably would have kicked my ass
sober now i stay true
mom also met a fine fella
u actually would approve
no need to kick this guys ass
hes good to her n the kids to
madison is so smart n beautiful
byron is turning into a handsome man
there both striving so well
u should be a very proud dad
two of ur friends got engaged
there so cute n its exciting news
i hope they live a life of happiness
i know u would feel the same to
ur brother misses u the most
hes coping the best he can
he misses u as much as i do
he was ur biggest fan
ur neighbors n friends
also stop by ur page
reminiscing about the good times
the laughter n good chatter ud engage
thank-god for all the music
its a good way to deal with pain in life
cause without u here with us
its like eating steak without a knife
im over trying to understand
i feel ur in a happier place
you had ur own reasons
your demons u finally faced
but in a couple days
ur birthday we will celebrate
the big thirty seven u turn
teasing u old man woulda been great
your always in our hearts
in our thoughts forever jay
so while ur up in heaven...
smile...cause its ur birthday :)
Copyright © Jamie Yost | Year Posted 2013
Halloween was coming and the angels thought they'd have some fun,
Since they sometimes thought of dressing up before the Holy One.
They all got together and decided to do just that,
Dress up in devilish costumes...Surprise the Lord like some earthly college frat.
Each one was to make his costume from the ethereal
A very inexpensive and unusual type of material.
Then, when the Lord was looking down at earth
Don the costumes for some Heavenly mirth.
It'll be a costume party for us here in our Heavenly abode
Different from always wearing these white sophisticated robes.
We'll have a good laugh and God will understand
We're just having a laugh here in His Heavenly plan.
The moment came, all the costumes had been made
And when the Lord looked up, Heaven was a different shade.
"Something is amiss, here." , He said in the shades of that red hue
Perhaps I'll bring Satan here, to find out if this is something new.
It would be difficult to invite that guest into heaven you see
As he had been banished for all the eons of centuries.
But nothing is impossible for the Lord for He can do any feat
And just when he was to summon Satan, the Angels all shouted
"Trick or Treat"!
Copyright © Daniel Cwiak | Year Posted 2010
~~Johnny Depp Wrapped in ChocolateThat Would Be Heaven Sent~~
Bonjour môn amies a ballade to write, will be my fait accompli
The trials of a woman to bring love - in a village that did not play.
An alluring female chocolatier opens a choclaterie-e
Hated by the Mayor she wished her plans she never did lay
Ooh la la !! Her dress was racy - but still they began to pay
Johnny Depp was her gypsy lover when on the river they went
But she had to win the love of others to fulfil plans, come what may
Johnny Depp wrapped in chocolate - that would be heaven sent.
A village so French - a so called femme fatal-e
She determined to change there outlook and stay
Viva la difference, but one by one she turned them to see
Her chocolate treats did melt in mouth - in secret they did say
C’est manifique - they whispered with authority
Her sweets bites bought together those she thought were meant
Even though some tried to block her treats others made a silent plea
Johnny Depp wrapped in chocolate – that would be heaven sent.
To church the lady never went an illegitimate child the Mayor did see
But slowly the French ladies turned to love this alluring woman and say
Her chocolate they thought magical- her raison d’etre it must be
Her tête-à-têtes were to open hearts, and bring peace and love to stay
Reconciliations made in her chocolate shop - their thoughts began to sway
But no chocolates were they to eat, and the reason - it was lent…
But those that did dare to try - found on their tongues it did dance and play
But Johnny Depp wrapped in chocolate - that would be heaven sent.
Prince Depp my piece-de-resistance, is there for all to see
My joie de vivre if I had been there, even though it may be lent
I would have paid money just to see…
Johnny Depp wrapped in chocolate - that would be heaven sent.
For the Un Deux Trois contest....well at least I tried ha ha
Copyright © Mandy Tams The Golden Girl | Year Posted 2012
Lately I’ve been thinking about heaven
And the renowned paradise up there
Plus getting to see my brethren
And memories that we’ll get to share
But a thought came into my noodle
An idea I’ve never thought before
That my kin, of which there must be oodles
Of maybe ten thousand or more
Coz I expect most my past relations
Have made the trip above the clouds
And if they’re all there since creation
Then they must have formed a large crowd
So that not only grandparents I’ll see
Yes sure enough, dead cousins too
Plus there’ll be grand’s to the tenth degree
In a couple of miles-long queue
Yes, they’ll most likely all know my name
And introduce me while giving their own
But after hugging great, great, great aunt Mame
All the other names will remain unknown
Yet, in heaven we’ll all be happy
And enjoy each day of the week
That is until great to the 8th grand pappy
Loses his teeth and refuses to speak
David Fisher 1/17/2015
Copyright © David Fisher | Year Posted 2015
The crocs were lined around the rim,
catching a nap after their swim,
until hearing, "Wake up guys,
supper's falling from the skies.
I'll race you for a share of him".
Inspired by Carolyn' contest 4th place
Copyright © Joyce Johnson | Year Posted 2010
My father-in-law, Frank was a man that loved to shop,
We were two peas in a pod, we shopped til we dropped.
One spring day we decided to shop out of town,
We shopped best without my husband around.
We left my husband happily on his tractor on our land,
Then set off for a shopping day oh so grand!
The sun was shining, and we had Sinatra for the ride.
We couldn’t have picked a better day if we had tried!
We had lunch and then shopped in all the stores,
Happy we weren’t at home stuck doing the chores.
We started to get tired and decided to leave.
Then walked outside to a sight we couldn’t believe.
It was a mini tornado and not a soul to be found,
But the strangest thing was the money blowing around.
Money was falling from the sky, and our hands and feet were flying.
It was like a dream… catching the money was intensely gratifying.
We informed the store about the cash from above,
Then counted the money in the car we were so undeserving of.
A man knocked on the window when we were counting the dough,
It was about seventy-five bucks the wind fortuitously bestowed.
The man said to Frank, “ Oh sir you forgot one,” and handed him a five.
Frank took the five, said “God bless you,”…and I wanted to hide.
Later my husband scolded, “You should have given him the five, it wasn’t yours to keep!”
Frank replied, “What the hell, it wasn’t his either, God dropped it at my feet!”
Copyright © Brenda McGrath | Year Posted 2016
What makes you happy?
Is it the stars at night?
The sound of the chirping birds?
Or is it because you received a blessing?
Are you happy because your chicken already laid its first egg?
Or because you've been enrolled to a school?
Is it because you've been rewarded a new pair of slippers?
Or because you got what you wanted from the mall?
Are you happy because your mom allowed you to have an ice cream?
Or maybe because your dad brought you to Disneyland?
Is it because life taught you a new game today?
Or because you enjoy some game on your iPod?
Are you happy because you've perfected the taste of your coffee?
Is that grin because of a bet you've won?
So why? Tell me
Is it the fact that there's still fresh air that you're breathing?
Is it because you just finished a novel?
Or because you've composed a song yourself?
Are you glad that you've designed a perfect house for you?
Or because you gave yourself a car?
Are you smiling because of your high grades?
Is it because you made a new friend today?
Do you feel great for having an awesome pet?
Or is it because your family loves you so?
Why are your dimples showing off?
Is it because you feel God's presence?
Or is it because you can now smell justice ahead of you?
Is that what makes you happy?
So what exactly makes you happy?
Who created that rainbow in your eyes?
Are you happy because you feel it?
Or are you just happy because you say so?
Copyright © Aiken Ylarde | Year Posted 2013
Poor Clem was hanging off the shed rafters,
His angry outback wife strutting underneath,
" You've gotta come down some time Clem,"
Said angry Etta through grinding teeth.
"I've never heard of anything so despicable,"
Poor Clem was hanging on in dreaded fear,
"You think you know a man so well,
Then he goes and takes your beer."
Copyright © john williams | Year Posted 2015
When I climbed out of my bed today
The first thing that I wanted to do was pray
Thinking of all the foolish things I had done
All being done in the name of such good fun
I tried to live out a happy,and joyous life
Found a highschool sweety,that is now my wife
Every year has always been truely such a blast
Each new one usually,being better then the last
We now live in a town,where we both went to school
Back then this town was always,the coolist of the cool
I guess that is why we decided to stay
Never even thinking about,ever moving away
My life in a flash,has seemed passed me by
Getting older now,the time just seems to fly
Honey I hope to stay with you,in your heart and mind
As I slowly reach the end,of my lifelong line
If I go to heaven,I will try to save a spot for you
So you better make sure,that you will go there to
Don't leave me sitting up there,by myself all alone
Wondering where in the heck,has my sweety flown
Copyright © Dan Kearley | Year Posted 2011
Rays of yellow and orange sunlight
Your eyes beaming with delight
Strolling hand by hand along the garden
Where flowers blooms and sweetness blend
Tucking an orchid behind my ear
Drawing me so close and so dear
I smell your musky natural scent
Twirling and filling me with sense
Quietly, we sat and had a small talk
Unminding even, as night falls
On the grass, we lie down
Staring up and pointing to heaven stars
Under the shadowy gleam of the moon
There and there, we shared one kiss
Next to you in a warmth loving cocoon
Copyright © Olive Eloisa Fraser | Year Posted 2014
Adam and Eve
Thoughts of a lover friend; Cleverly Yet tenderly
Synergy, independence, stunned in; Yet meant in; Value
Truth is, Let me see where to begin; Lovely you look silly
From a boy to a man; a lady to a woman; smile
Early then young ceremony pledged
To thee on our branches edge do we be
I WED THEE
Blown by what's not known; unexplained
Adam's Apple plucked from this Tree "The Life of We"
Working for this ship thoughts for miles; Sitting branched yo yo-in
Who's to blame not to be plain; repenting is cycling say no to Insanity
First time said; you meant it gladly; Shrugged shoulders "Heyy" relations
Conflicted wrongs from the design of nature's man; confessed in
Peered sin; Then opposed from our unique profession
Companions foundation never ends; but factor
Look this bush I surrender thee to "We" Look Its The Bird's and The Bee's
Adam and Eve from Happily became Ever and After
Reality is rhythmically; Our purity came with virginity
Growth lessons to be free; Thinking a baby will make three; Its A wedding
The value of this band learned as child; A sir, A ma'am that rhymes with I AM
"Hold On" to be we; Just being fruitful and multiplying
Nothing far fetched just a lesson; Remember to sit for a session
"Perfection" Message!; Life a blessing
Doors opened "Enjoy Heaven"
This letter starts with Our vowel A
By. D. Stokes
That's All Folks
Copyright © Darius Stokes | Year Posted 2016
All people that on Earth do Dwell
if you have sex you'll go to Hell
unless of course you share a ring
then God will let you do your thing.
But you of course must play the game
that hypocrites shout in his name;
the rules are clear you must not stray,
don't question God, it's just that way!
But who interprets God's true word
the story really is absurd,
his rules of course were set in stone
by Moses looking for a home.
But even he thought they were crap,
his temper led to that mishap
when even stone was forced to break,
the rewrite.... just a second take?
In name of God, from broken stone,
we must not stray from those at home
or you will find without a doubt
that from your home you'll be thrown out.
But was it not another deed
forbid by God let Eve conceive?
For only when he cast both out
did birth of Mankind come about.
All people that on Earth do Dwell
if we have sex we'll go to Hell.
But when we're in that deepest pit,
as long as everyone can fit,
I'm sure we all will have some fun
where with our friends we're joined as one
and maybe when down there we dwell
we'll share the Devil's wife as well!
Ivor G Davies
Copyright © Ivor Davies | Year Posted 2015
Standing all alone,
at the edge of time.
With no where to fall,
and no where to climb.
I feel like I'm standing
at the end of the line.
Of that soul collecting train
that I missed the first time.
It don't matter much to me,
I'm just going to stand here and wait.
For that golden train to pull in,
taken me to the pearly gates.
When that train pulls out
your going to hear me yell.
As I'm leaving this place
that's now a man made hell.
Where all the politics and corruption,
of this once great place.
Turned into need and greed
that just fills me with disgrace.
Now I'm far from perfect,
God knows that is true.
But, I'm praying for forgiveness,
and I suggest you do too.
So when that train pulls in
to take us from this man made hell.
Grab the seat next to me
and we can both yell!
Dan Kearley: 3-24-16
Copyright © Dan Kearley | Year Posted 2016
McGee was late again
It seemed like his, 'Whole' life
"I promise, to be on time"
He said to his new wife
The city, was so crowded
And at such a hectic pace
He drove around the block
But there was no parking space
So he glimpsed up to the heavens
Begging help, from God on high
And that he'd give up drinking
Go to Mass and never lie
If God would grant a parking space
So he could park his car
McGee would give up all his vice
And be a better man by far
Then , just then, there appeared
An empty parking space
It popped up out of nowhere
Before McGee's own face
McGee glanced at the heavens
And said "Thank You Lord Your Grace
But it's Ok, Forget it
I've just I found me-self a space"
Copyright © Jerry T Curtis | Year Posted 2014
If there ain't no Bacon in Heaven
I'm gonna keep right on sinning
For hell's where I rather be
If I can enjoy my BLT
Now don't be a judging
No use of nudging
If there ain't no Bacon in Heaven
Then Heaven ain't for me
That pure smell of delight
That gets you to jump up from night
Bacon for breakfast, yes siree
Bacon Bacon all for me
The smell of Bacon
The taste of Bacon
The flavor of Bacon
Crispy, chewy, fry or bake
Bacon Bacon for goodness sake
If there ain't no Bacon in Heaven
That's hard for me to believe
For how could there be no Bacon in Heaven
When Oscar Mayer is the patron saint of meat candy
Yes there is Bacon in Heaven
Saint Peter those angel wings are mine
The taste of Bacon can only be Divine.
Copyright © Fritz Purdum | Year Posted 2015
I do not know?
So it is way, way down by the Sea,
that vision comes,
As the waves touch upon the feet
of the shore line.
As soul wades in.
So it is way, way down deep, to walk upon...
leaving the shore,
catching a breeze,
...setting the sails,
walking upon the winds,
So swing low, sweet the chariot,
that lifts the spirit,
...just to reach a little shack by the road,
with a hole in the roof,
and the boards on the side fall often times,
the winds do blow
through the holes,
Yet, here is where
a little poetry comes.
Copyright © Marrio Biggs | Year Posted 2014
How I Got Richer and What I Did Next
I struck a sly deal with some Wall Street investors.
I shorted 'em stocks that didn't exist!
But they got me back (those post-empty-nesters)
by making fake deals I couldn't resist.
So I made a bold plan. I'd get big and still bigger.
My dream was immense: I'd conquer the market!
How would I do it? I'll bet you can't fig'ure.
I'll whisper my plan. (Shhh! I won't bark it.)
What I make is no secret. My dream is the thing.
My stuff the world uses. It can't do without.
My competitors fear (while secretly hoping)
I'll become a cartel and buy them all out!
So here's what I make (a simple thing really).
You use it at dinner, at breakfast and lunch,
when it's hot and it's steamy or cold and it's chilly.
Donuts to dollars you must have a hunch.
It fixes most things, an all-purpose tool.
It will open a can, pull the cork from a bottle,
even fix all your plumbing (now isn't that cool?).
Under the hood it'll fix your car's throttle.
I know that you're anxious. I know you can't wait.
I'm making the point. Sit still and don't fidget!
Now no more pondering and staying up late:
I make what you use: the Gadget and Widget!
Making millions and billions takes plenty of people.
My company grew, got huge and kept growing.
A company needs growth. A church needs a steeple.
You see how it works? I just kept on going.
I hired by hundreds and thousands and more.
I worked 'em like slaves, paid dimes even less.
They threatened to strike, even steal the store
but I had the power! I could hardly care less.
I'd fire 'em in masses, by hundreds and dozens.
I gave them no notice, I paid them no pension.
I fired them all, brothers sisters and cousins.
I paid off the media; they gave me no mention.
But shedding the people only solved half the puzzle.
I still needed gadgets! Work had to get done.
Just how could I do it? I put hands on my muzzle.
No output, no profit. So how could I run?
At midnight one day I awoke with a start
My plan was so clear, so cool and so cunning.
I'd go overseas! My plan was quite smart.
I knew with assurance I'd keep right on running.
I worked day and night 'til after sunset.
I worked without stop. I even skipped meals.
I outsourced production and then flew by jet
to scour the globe for even more deals.
Gov'nments with greed – those were our game.
Why, you might ask, do business with these?
The answer is simple: except for the name
they've two things in common: the gov'ment takes fees
And labor's dirt cheap (it costs odds and ends).
The less I pay out the more left for me!
It works like a scale: when their side descends
my side goes up. It's logic, you see.
My scheme soon paid off. I spanned the whole globe.
I owned my competitors by tens and by scores.
To find where I wasn't you'd dig and you'd probe:
just gadgets and widgets in millions of stores!
A few years of this 'bout did me in.
I crawled to my bed and I slept a deep sleep.
I dreamed a strange dream of goodness and sin.
I chatted with God about what I could keep.
He said in the end it was all up to me
but my state of affairs just didn't look good.
Pearly Gates entry he couldn't quite see.
Suddenly in front of St. Peter I stood.
We discussed and we bargained, tried to see eye to eye.
Well most of that's true. He discussed and I bargained.
(I knew I would lose but I still had to try.
I thought that maybe he could just be out-jargoned!)
But this wasn't happening! It was just a dream.
No need to worry. My life wouldn't change.
(Dreams being dreams things aren't what they seem.
Abandon my business? I couldn't. Too strange.)
St. Peter spoke more. He had some suggestions.
“Do something useful. Help orphans and widows.
People have needs. Look ' round. Ask some questions.
And ask your friend Sid. I'm sure that Sid knows.
And oh by the way, those countries you mention?
At least say you're sorry. It surely can't hurt.
Don't make a big show. Avoid causing tension.
Just say it with meaning. Try not to be curt.”
I blinked, rubbed my eyes, then blinked a bit more.
I stretched and remembered I had to call Sid!
Now what was his number? I had it before.
Just have to remember where I had it hid.
I looked in my book. No Sid in there.
I started to wonder: did I even know Sid?
Did I sleep? Am I up? I'll pull out a hair.
Ouch! I'm awake! So I never did!
I recalled Pearly Gates. I remembered a dream
and trying to bargain at the Gates with St. Pete.
That stayed in my head (strange it may seem).
We'd discussed and debated. St. Pete's hard to beat!)
I'll allow he's a point. I won't pick a nit.
I've mostly been right (just a little bit wrong).
Okay, okay maybe more than a bit.
If I set things to rights, we could get along.
But St. Pete asks a lot. (This really does sting.)
If stuff needs some doing ... I might maybe could.
Now give me a moment to ponder this thing.
If I knew what to do, I'm sure that I would.
(He went to his office. He sat and he thought.
He called for his staff. But they'd left, the whole bunch.
So he made a few plans with ideas he'd caught
then got so excited he even missed lunch!
All the people he'd fired? He hired them back.
He said he was sorry. He tripled their pay.
He asked them their names. He said, “Call me Mack!”.
The sun rose much brighter the very next day.
He did all he promised, or so we are told.
He did what he said. He even did more!
He began to think friendships were worth more than gold.
He laughed right out loud – hadn't done that before!
He perked up his ears, St. Peter did.
When he heard that guffaw, that belly-roll laugh.
His laughter was joyous, like it came from a kid
St. Peter stood up, took hold of this staff.
I think he's found what he used to lack.
He's learned the difference twixt evil and sin.
When he gets here one day I'll shake his hand, pat his back.
I'll open the Gates and welcome him in.
Copyright © John Mudge | Year Posted 2016
To Heaven With Me
With my poems will set entire world on fire
Which is my destined desire that will not expire
Even though in some straights now so dire
Or geared up gas prices go higher and higher.
After gathering in one more mere glance
Was wondering if there could be a chance
Even though horrible when I do dance
My love will leave her in a terrible trance.
Not fearing all of the things I have done
Poems are popular and people won't shun;
Poet Laureate will probably be the one
Whose title and dastardly deed fell upon.
Poets have become of an epic proportion
Distinctively not result of any distortion
Poems were best ones there could ever be;
Out of jealousy took them to heaven with me.
James Thomas Horn
Copyright © James Horn | Year Posted 2015
At times, the world demands too much
And more than I can give
So then I close my eyes and dream
A special place I'd like to live
There's calmness, peace and warmth in the air.
Copyright © Carl McKever | Year Posted 2006
Heaven for Some
It's said, by those who have been there and back,
that hell can at times be a boring place, pink
lightening and women that endlessly try a new
frocks on. Here are pools of banal sin, rivers
of pornography and small time crooks trying
to sell you fake religious icons, but not one evil
dictator around repenting his murderous ways,
or a capitalist swine now regretting cheating
workers of their pension rights. Where do they
go? Are they pardoned and sent to a privatized
heaven where they play high stake poker with
senior seraphs? I'd like to know before I rob
a bank. I'm fed up with stealing children's toys.
Copyright © jan oskar hansen | Year Posted 2012