Daddy, why did you go away,
Don't you know I wanted you to stay!
Daddy, when you left mom,
Don't you know you left me too.
Now all I do is cry and cry
--- I want to die!
Daddy, mommy say's it's better this way,
What does she know!
There's not enough band-aids to cover up the blues
Mom's kisses can't heal this kind of pain.
Daddy, I look around
No one stands in your garage
Daddy, You took every tool
Except the hammer and sitting stool
Daddy, I still miss you
--- I love you.
Dear Daddy, I'm all grown up now
Haven't seen you since I was 10
Daddy, I sit on your favorite chair,
No longer do I miss the way you caressed my hair.
Daddy, I'm taking the old hammer and this BRAND NEW saw,
It's time to patch all the holes mom punched in the wall
*The day you walked out on us*
Daddy, don't worry about the times I tripped and fell
Mom, found someone to fix the loose boards,
Got tired of scraping my knees
Daddy, I finally realized I'm okay,
I agree with mom, it's better this way.
I hold three magic rocks, in my hand. Rolling them over and over and over. Leaving this
reality behind, far behind I stepped into the magic mirror and there I was back in 1959. It
was the same month, November. I looked around and it was the same as I remember it had
been then. Mom looked so young and beautiful and said, "The school bus will be here in a
few minutes." I looked at the calendar and saw that it was November 25th, the day before
Thanksgiving. I said, "But mom, I haven't been in school in forty years." I got this strange
look from her but she didn't say anything. Walking toward the door I caught a reflection of
myself in the hall mirror. I was so young. My hand immediately went to my face and I
stopped and stared at myself for a few minutes. I said, "Mom, can I stay home and be with
you today?" Again I got that strange look from her, then she smiled and said, "Sure, it's
your last day before Thanksgiving anyway, why not?" She and I sit down and talked for
hours. Then I said, "Do you mind if we go next door and visit with Maw Maw and Paw Paw?
I haven't seen them in so long and I've missed them terribly!" Again another strange look
from mom. Next door I saw Maw Maw and Paw Paw as they had been in 1959. I wept and
they all looked at me so strangely. I hugged them and kissed them all and we talked for
hours. Dad finally came home from work and I ran and hugged him so hard. "Dad why did
you have to leave us in June?" Again I got strange looks from everyone. My tears were
falling. I saw Aunt Frances and Uncle Bill who lived beside Maw Maw and Paw Paw. "I've
missed you both for so long." Strange looks again! They didn't understand because to them,
it was just another day in 1959. The day grew late and I knew my time was soon ending. I
got near the magic mirror and mom and dad were standing there so young and healthy. I
said, "Mom I'll see you on the other side of the mirror, but dad, I'll see you another time,
another place." They didn't understand. I stepped back through and my reflection was as it
had been before. Mom was sitting in her chair at age 84. I said, "Mom, do you remember
the day before Thanksgiving, 1959, when I stayed home from school and we spent the day
together?" She said, "Yes, it was so strange that you could never remember anything about
it. It was as though you had amnesia.
Year of the Acorn
(For my Father who
has Parkinsons &
Out on a winter walk
you solemnly put an
acorn into my hand.
Something in my head
"Keep it safe
and he'll be safe".
I kept it to this
One candle on my
burned into my
mind's eye forever.
You took a
to keep me in the
My sister arrived in
You took me to feed
she greeted us with
I fled, covering my
Mother told me the
facts of life.
You kept well out of
A disco at the end
of a long, quiet
You always drove me
safely there and
You were judge and
of all boyfriends.
Year twenty three.
You gave me away
to the best
boyfriend of all.
A montage of eras
replay in the bright
lens of memory
till the year of the
and the acorn.
And I kept it safe
so you'd be safe,
only now it looks
cracked and old;
not quite like an
and you are not
quite like you.
One of my earliest remembrances in this place; life
Was when I was about three or four years of age
The fear overcoming my heart thinking if ever
I were to be seperated from or lose, my father ?
Within my minds eye I see a small child in spirit
Walking hand and hand with their own beautiful
Father amid heaven turning back to smile; John
There he goes, my dad and myself left sorting....
About this flesh; bittersweet, tides through time
Which touch every life yet in faith I know that all
Shall one day be well; as I wave and into the light
Their beauty's go rejoicing a soul; wiping love's tear.
...."John Harrison Sadberry ˜ March 26th, 1939 ˜ Beauty ˜ To,
December 19th, 2012, &, 'Forevermore ˜ I Love You Dad!'".... *
He was always so happy
strong and bold.
He'd give you the shirt off of his back.
He had a rough life
growing up through the depression,
but like he always does,
he got through it.
He has two boys, of whom he is so proud.
Moved from Regina, to Victoria.
He had the best life anyone his age could have wanted.
But ever since his wife died,
he has not been the same.
But like he has always done,
he got through it.
just a little forgetful.
That's how it always starts out...
But like always, he powered through it,
He is not the same person that I used to know.
He been sentenced to the prison in his own mind.
Possessed by the thoughts of his dogs ashes.
He likes to play the blame game,
but we know he doesn't remember that it was him.
He wakes up in the night
shaking with pain,
tears streaming down his face.
There is nothing we can do,
Two more tylenol.
Hold on to hope
for as long as you can,
It's only a matter of time now.
He gets vocal, a very loud tone.
He'll block you in your room
and make false accusations
But we know that it's the pain induced monster in him.
Tick tock, tick tock...
You can't handle the stress anymore
you have to leave.
Just hope for the best,
maybe it will get better.
Surprise, it doesn't.
Your denial is foolish, everyone knows
what happens next.
All results of
This is a poem about the future I'd love to have with the boy of my dreams.
None of this has actually happened yet (besides us falling in love with eachother) but it's how I would like it to happen.
Once upon a time, I became the luckiest girl in the world. I fell in love with a gorgeous boy with blue eyes, and he actually loved me back. He was like my prince, he treated me like his princess and would do anything for me. Today, we're united as King and Queen. It's been years, but walking down the aisle I'm still staring at the cutest, most perfect guy I've ever seen. When our lips finally meet after parting to say "I do", it tastes like Heaven.
Once upon a time, I married a gorgeous boy with blue eyes. And today, I saw those perfect blue eyes light up when he first held our little girl in his arms. She's got her Daddy's blue eyes and just a little bit of her Momma's brown hair. She's going to be spoiled and loved more than possible. She'll know we support her no matter what, and she can tell us everything. It will be perfect.
Once upon a time, one set of blue eyes became two, and we were made into a family. Now, that second pair of blue eyes is walking out the door to college, with a suitcase in one hand and a boy's hand in the other. He better love her and treat her just as well as her Daddy does.
Once upon a time, I fell in love with a gorgeous boy with blue eyes. His hair has dulled and grayed but his eyes are the same, and they've seen a lifetime's worth of happiness and love. My baby had babies with the boy she walked out the door with, and I can tell she loves them as much as we loved her. Now it's her time to live.
You irritate me.
You touched your daughter.
Actually, you touch not just yours,
You sick and twisted man.
You try your hardest to get it in
But she knows better than to let you.
You detest what a father should be
and act like nothing happens after.
All this, you see, will just past away
is what you say.
But no, Memories last through time.
Who could forget what you did?
You sick and twisted man.
But one thing irritates me the most,
how this has affected her soul,
how this affected her outlook on life.
how this has been embedded in her,
making her feel like a computer with a virus.
You sick and twisted man.
I want to do bad things to you,
like kill you,
or banish you to hell.
But, I have been taught “we also forgive us who sins against us”.
So I forgive you, and love on you as if you are me.
it is written “Love your neighbor as yourself”
and I will.
You lost and forgiven man.
The evening star glowing in a dust choked sky.
A girl stands by a window, with a tear in her eye.
She stares at the scene, hardly visible through the grime.
She whispers in the wind, “Bring my Dad home this time”
She opens the window, and climbs outside,
Having a flashlight, in her hand, as her guide.
Its glow shows the sides of the street.
She’s afraid for what the light will meet
Bodies piled everywhere she turns,
She wants to go home, and never return.
What brought this fate upon her town?
All her emotions are stripped and torn down.
A frightening sound explodes in her ear.
Shadows in the road now appear.
She run and hides behind a broken wall
Praying to god the rest doesn’t fall.
Footsteps coming closer to her
She can’t tell who because it’s all a blur
She backs away further so not to be seen in light,
Quieting her heart pounding from fright.
Gun shots and screams fill the air,
All these sounds, her ears couldn’t bear.
A slight whimper slips from her lips,
And over the broken stone she trips.
The shadows run closer, showering her heart with fear,
She wishes they would just disappear.
They pass by her; she fills with delight,
She just wants to see her dad tonight.
She shines the light, to show her place,
And to the shine comes a familiar face.
She doesn’t understand who’s to blame
Because on the tag shows her father’s name.
She holds in her tears and refrains from crying.
She falls to the ground where her dad was lying.
She lifts his arm and buries her face in his chest.
She closes her eyes wanting to forget the rest.
The shadows emerge yet she doesn’t see,
How close the end for her would be.
They look down at her, aim, shoot, and fire.
Being with her dad is her only desire.
The night had ended causing a little girl harm
But she took her last breath, in her father’s arms.
Gathered at the table during recess
The playground was muddy and cruddy so we had to stay inside today
All the games in the game closet were taken except this one—SCRABBLE
I knew we didn’t have enough time to play it because mom and dad used to sit at the kitchen table for hours
Hours upon hours
Lunch and supper would even pass and they would be giggling and laughing over nothing
Nothing but a bunch of corny words that folks don’t even use now days
After the game was over, they would disappear into their bedroom and giggle again for a while longer
I remembered thinking to myself, “Who is the real kid here?”
They loved this game…
Well, it was my turn
Everyone else had drawn their 7 tiles
The worn black velvet bag had only 7 tiles left
With only 15 minutes of recess to go, they kept talking and burning up the clock
Just like mom and dad used to do as though time stood still
I placed my tiles on the table hiding them from Stephen
How is it possible that I drew an entire word?
Once I drew an entire word with mom and dad when there was a snow storm
They tricked me into playing all afternoon
I drew E-Q-U-A-T-O-R and they thought it was a miracle
Their laughter filled the room and I became an instant hero
This time wasn’t so great even though I won the game in one turn
I hate this word!
A seven letter word that tore my entire universe apart
How ironic that I won with those seven powerful tiles
There is no winning in divorce
My heart bleeds
My tears rush
Stephen’s parents are still together
He wouldn’t understand the pain
All I can think of now is how much I hate divorce and how I hate SCRABBLE…
Emotional embarrassment saved by the recess bell
Written for Nancy Jones' Contest~SCRABBLE~
by Gwendolen Rix
I recall . . .
Dad's work shed to this day
The scent of wood and dust in the air
Cobwebs in corners and crooks
Sun flooding in through windows
His scarred and scored wooden work table
And the countless tin cans of nails and screws
And Dad working on a new plan
His coffee cup forgotten and ignored
And I would bring him flowers
Precious dandelions, buttercups and daisies
Which he would place in a dirty container of some sort
Smiling, he would lift me up to sit beside him
We would ponder his scribbled sketches
O, the grand ideas he had
I still have those doodles and outlines
And the lazy afternoon would pass
For me and Dad
And later we would sit on the rusty porch swing
Side by side, just swinging
And I would hold his hand so tight
Like I never wanted to let it go
But, God had a plan
Written in the book of destiny
And who am I
To question what is written by God
So, I had to let go
But today, I sure am missing Dad
April 14, 2013
Placed First in Poet Destroyers Surprize Contest, 2013
Submitted to #1 Poems Only Contest