"This is dedicated to all who understand this. Whether we like it or not." -D.J.E.
I wasn’t gonna write this
Emotions are stirring high
How much time has passed
Still feel your presence
Of the slowest death
To these present seconds
An ugly revelation
Tainted the sunshine
That bared on our souls
365 days ago
So many tears
Had filled the ocean
For love’s river
Were held back by presumption’s walls
The dam’s of what could have been
Here I stand
In this present moment
Your essence still lingers
Like the flakes of a dandelion b r e a k i n g f r e e
From its home
Tormented echoes of “why”
“Please don’t go”
“I love you…I love you so much”
High pitched resonations
Rafts of secondary importance
This heart still knows
For it will always recall
Played me a fool
While you held hands
Across my shoulders
Left me uncomfortably numb
All my rights
And all the while
My foolish hopes
Continued to warp my mind
Maybe if I didn’t look back when you walked away
Like the rules said…
These soft acoustic riffs
Replay in my head
You were my “Wonderwall”
“You could’ve been the one…to save me”
But I overcame
Didn’t want to be an inconvenience for you
Colors of Fall
Your favorite season
You were like Summer & Winter
Knew when to turn up the heat
Make me sweat
Each new arrival
A summer equinox
But, when it was over
Nothing but cold
Even solace’s bandages
Could not heal
But, I weathered the storm
And would do it again
Cause it was for real
Here I am
52 weeks have past
Of that hourglass
With no more sands
Buried in dragon’s chest
You are in my silent prayer
Even though you are contained
Within my heart’s asylum cell block home
I loved you
With all that I had
That you will be the only regret
I will ever be proud of.
© Drake J. Eszes
If only I can ask the world
To gather all the love
Each person has.
If only I can feel the love
Free of inhibitions in some extent
And share it with everyone.
If only I can be
With the love of yours
So that I can have my last wish.
If you permits me to live and die
Unconditionally with and without you
Oneness reflected indeed.
"Stygstrome" is the Afrikaans version of "Updrafts", one of my earliest poems (including some showcased naivety :D), and is the first poem that I ever publicly posted online, right here on poetrysoup.com, 3 years ago to the very day.
I am also including the English version to this post.
Swart vere absorbeer altyd
die meeste sonskyn -
'n Volmaakte fusie
van donker en lig.
Ebbe oë glinster
hoog in die kalm, koue hemelruim.
'n Vinnige daling
die byna onsigbare
digte Winter se mistigheid.
Sterk strome strik skielik,
'n Voël van staal
breek die antieke fokus
met sy dreunende, magtige brul.
in 'n stygende vlug
van suiwer vergenoegdheid.
Swart vere absorbeer altyd
die meeste lig --
Black feathers always absorb
the most sunshine -
a perfect fusion
of dark and light.
Ebony eyes glitter
high in the calm, cold sky.
A quick dip downwards,
the nearly invisible
thick Winter's fog.
As currents suddenly catch hard,
a bird of steel
thunders by overhead,
breaking ancient focus
with its loud, powerful roar.
in a flight
of pure contentment.
Black feathers always absorb
the most light.
*A warm thank you to the ever-lovely Christine Ueri for finding
the perfect Afrikaans words to poetically translate this poem.
Did you close your eyes? Did you think of them?
Memories come every year and I weep, alone and wondering
if at the top and at the end you had a fear of heights
as if the answer could make a difference.
Yet I'm dismayed to watch it again, acrophobic, imagining...
a room afire and the smoke making signals to the World
no easy means of escape, no places to hide, no exit.
Suffocated in that vision, I stay breathless trying to perceive...
Hot gasses in red eyes begging for the luxury of fresh air
a burning window and the fall-space: coin with just one side
pieces of crystals in livid hands without time to wave
sticky blood warming fingers in a last cold morning.
And I weep, helpless and thinking in what you saw from above
that pandemonium of alarms, yelling and the sound of the fire
just an instant to decide how to face it, how to accept it
an instant in which you may comprehend our brevity.
Perhaps, you could say goodbye... Did you have time?
Did you close your eyes? Did you think of them?
in their faces, their eyes, their voices, their scents...
Behind, below, inside...Death, waiting for your decision...
And I weep for your innocence... for your panic...for you
I'm with you now, terrified... yet, I can't follow you...
But you drag me and I jump with you, as every year
as the only way I can remember you...feeling you, being with you ...
And I weep...recoiling to that morning that will live in infamy
in its intense impact, in those images
Because the towers disappeared in its collapse
but you, through the years...you're still falling.
Footnote: This short video is very disturbing; it shows people falling and jumping from the towers. I don't recommend you to watch it because it may offend or hurt your feelings. However, it shows the true horror of that day and I think that it's the true extent in which those innocent people lost their lives.
I sat in the darkness and waited
For the music to begin
For the words that were to come;
He picked up every strum of stress
And sent it to the Northern Hemisphere
Where Angels sieve, retrieve
I lost the strain of my attempts only to regain
My long lost strength;
As I sat in the darkness to wait,
Something beautiful came raining in,
His light and his might;
When first I came to know this world, my eyes were young and hurt,
And O're the years I came to know, the expression in my heart,
I fought my way through love and pain, through heart break, and much worse,
Until one day I found a man, who could love me at my best and worst,
He would drive me to the point of insane, yet bring me back to laughing tears,
He could make my eyes weep in shame, yet hold me close and i would heal,
18 years, it took to know that I would never leave his side,
For when I was born I knew this man; Inside my soul, the knowledge survived,
I found him after 16 years, And knew I loved when i reached 17,
Now the age of womanhood is apon me, and if asked Ill respond,
it is his wife I shall gladly be,
Sweet eyes so young, but aged too,
my love today, I explain to you.
My Son Moon and Star ~
Approaching the celebration of his Birth
cherishing the gift I received
within weeks of conception I knew
something amazing was in Creation ~
the Stars held a party
sending me with one of their own
Gazing at 3 shooting stars twinkling crossing the sky
It was magic It was destiny taking its flight.
In love with an October full moon
drawing and painting I liked
thinking of Vincent Van Gogh ~
caught in a loss of time
Hours going by as choosing my color
a wittness to three falling stars
A clear night sky sparkle's
A once Famous Star was sent
inspiring the tiny child inside ~
Never a doubt in my mind at all
child bearing was worth any pain received
yours will be in a pursuit of a dream ~
one to cherish and hold
My Son was born the following August ~
working on the set of Grimm 3rd season this year
as the set of Leverage for 3 years .
Has done a Indie movie here
In Paris it was seen and honored
coming soon filmed in Portland ~
"The House of Last Things "
awaiting the credits , you will see
1st Assistant Director ~ production assistant
My Young Lion Mans dream ~
A proud mom I watch every show and the credits
as foretold in a whisper to me 25 years ago
My Son & Moon and Star
A name you will all know ~
Happy Birthday to my creative Son
you will exist in my heart forever~
for the present.
The present through
past and current
our strong foundation.
To my dearest heart of hearts, it
doesn't go in vain the love you’ve
given to me. And I myself must agree, that
as a man, I’m sincerely lucky to be me.
Knowing that…When I stand…
then We stand
singular while holding on
to life hand in hand.
Regretting not anew the treasures
and experiences we’ve shared amongst
each other with no one else
to compare… And for that,
I love you, I love you, I love you
i sit here thinking about the days.
remembering the time we first met.
i was crying in the rain,
feeling the water and the pain.
until you came, and wiped my tears away.
you were like an angel in disguise,
you never ever fail to make me smile,
you were a stranger in my world,
but you made me realize my worth
when you touch my hand
i know that you understand.
I feel so safe whenever i'm with you,
the way you hug me tight when i feel blue.
you are just like a dream come true.
i wouldn't need anyone else but you.
and from now on i offer you my heart..
so i thank you for coming into my life,
for bringing the sunshine and making me feel alive.
you made my life complete,
baby, you're all i need
you are my missing piece.
PS:wrote this 2 years ago. i had this poem hidden and reserved for Mr. Right. :-)
When I emerged from the black ~~~
Acrid smoke and dust impaired my vision ~~~
Once settled ~~~
Iconic giants were no more ~~~
History reminds us, where we were at that time ~~~
(1)~when 2~I 3~emerged 4~from
5~the 6~black (7)~Acrid 8~smoke
9~and 10~dust 11~impaired 12~my
13~vision (14)~Once 15~settled (16)~Iconic
17~giants 18~were 19~no 20~more
(21)~History 22~reminds 23~us
24~where 25~we 26~were 27~at
Freedom I long to hear your bells ring
If you only knew what it would do to me
Auspice and a pair of Jacks, its sudden destruction
And the Poetry World's composure was completely destroyed
As we complete the circle of Life and Avalanche and bury the Poets
The organ plays and the funeral starts
As they compete with a man of God
Angel's and Chariots of fire
A demonstration of God's Power on earth
Extraordinary as her performance, I express myself
Court is convened now, she got the message
A star falls, I expand,
Lost Treasure discovered inside ourselves
How could I deny the fact
You gave me strength when no one else was ever there!
We treat it like a marble
in our pocket for a while
we win it
we lose it
but no matter where it goes
it always holds
the warmth of our hands
This morning I
Allowed God to open his hands
I wanted to see
My space in the universe
To find some meaning
For the the sixty years I traversed his grace
And never reached the edge of it
I wanted see again
The zig-zag path of my search
But the water gnawed the sand
Where my footprints were stored
In the world of God's hand
This morning I
May never know where the road bends
Or where it will go up a hill
I only know that I follow a calling
That following it before
Make all meanings strange to me
For faith determines nothing
More than an agreement to be pliable
No matter what
The sunrise comes to me
And the sunset leaves me here
In God's hand I
Have no where to go
Nothing more to know
Than there is no edge near my feet
April 12, 1861 the cannons could
be heard for miles around,
the war had started,that
led both sides to a long
and hard struggle.
Why was this site
chosen to start the fight,
it may have been that
this fort was not prepared
for a battle of any kind,
a shortage of cannons,
and other weapons,
hardlyl gave them any
chance to defend the fort
Abe Lincoln later in
his most famous speech,
said A Nation divided cannot stand,
which is a true statement.
The Civil War was to become
the bloodiest war in our history,
before the firing
on Fort Sumter
it was an unknown place
to most of the people,
now it stands out
as a major landmark
in our country.
I had a candlelight dinner last night. My love and I was feeling alright.
Neither one of us was frustrated. We cherished the moment and our
love was so elevated.
We both stared into each other's eyes, our heart racing oh so fast, just
sitting and thinking how long or love would last. We each touched each other
and felt sheer pleasure, we could not forget about this special moment we
both enjoyed, it helped relieved some of the pain and struggles that we
had confronted that day, right at this moment nothing seemed to get in the
The candlelight shining so clear and bright gave reflections of the way in
which we felt that night. It was so peaceful and serene, nothing but our
souls and spirits feeling one another, there was no trouble.
We both felt blessed to have enjoyed such memorable moment at the
present time we were in, just he and I sat there sipping on some gin.
For making it a little easier to get up in the morning, and putting up with my less than friendly
For making everyday that much better because you are a part of it....
For spending your nights dreaming with me, and working everyday to make those dreams
For being a great husband and father, and helping to make our home a loving place to be....
For spending the last 14 years loving me and making me feel like a special part of your life....
For being my best friend, and always being there for me no matter what....
For all these things and more, I LOVE YOU! Happy Anniversay to the love of my life!
Oh my delicate Mother,
with zest, stood up from the wheelchair
then began tapping dance steps
under new moon rising.
Like a floating butterfly
guided by notes of a theme song,
hands trailed away around the room,
while she gracefully led her pace.
And thirty roses decked a love-couch
enlivening cheeks reddened by bliss,
while her feet regaled in eased motion
unmindful of trickling heartbeat.
We gazed at Mom, awed by surged vim
lovely in a crimson dress billowing,
as joyous Dad grasped her for a slow waltz
highlighting their fateful pearl anniversary.
Mystic Rose’s The Good News Paper
by nette onclaud
As I sip on aged Cognac
swirling in circular sadness,
contained within cup made
of broken stained glass memories,
Witnessing Cloud 9’s silhouette
surround this glued enigma.
Lionel Ritchie was the rock for this moment’s bliss.
“Truly in love,
Emanating across cathedral uncertainty,
breaking its glass.
This was a celebration of priceless Silver.
A currency only earned by the Philanthropists of Love.
Creating justifiable fantasies
with attainable dreams.
It was amor, maintained.
While I sip on Cognac’s remnants,
mixed with retina’s loneliness,
with smile craving soul-pack solution,
In “Deep Sigh” Symphony: No. 9.
With my ventricle chambers
kissing subconscious on forehead,
in preparation for dream come true.
Because one day,
© Drake J. Eszes
Regarded as cruel
I wrapped all my tears, to see you smile.
you are the best, always by my side.
I tell you my feelings will get you crying,
you must think I’m out of my mind.
You don’t know, what I know,
all the angels let me go.
We were born to teethe and die,
you will grow to be so fine.
Fall in love, feel your softer side,
Remember me when life is kind.
When you go, let me know,
don’t walk away like the world and go.
Life is rough and the world unkind,
fight them down and you will be fine.
The truth of live is a brutal sight,
make no mistakes, you can learn from mine.
You have a strong heart, you are unique
I treasure times when you smile at me.
Live the life, I could not find,
be there for me, when I say goodbye.
Love is a wonder
shared by one another
it's the only reason
I'm not six feet under
Love in which I believe
in a will to sustain
I give back to life, now
in dormant states of pain
The power of Love
may not alone be enough
locked inside my dreams
escape only from above
higher than any human being
has ever gone before
I must have evolved
rise above hate, great once more
My Father taught me wisdom
I am imprisoned no longer
now an beast not of burden
I am no lion, I am stronger
on my shoulder sits twin dragons
long awaiting the day
evil forces come forth to
take what Love is left, away
A Hero of Love light
are what the world needs
angels, not demons
exist where ever you believe
follow your heart's direction
and you shall achieve
objects of affection
rid of materialistic greed
My bright energy
has awakened to a fire
never consuming the source
as the flames just grow higher
that is the desire
of a product we call Love
Fear, the counterpart
what I was once made of
I am slowly learning
how to win when my peace
is harder to sharpen
so I have given my pen leave
the sword has its uses
I must say I believe
to vanquish the evil
in the minds too diseased
to serve any purpose
except their own selfish ones
tomorrow a new day
in the clarity of the sun
where we two are now one
and one done now does
bring about a great change
lit by the righteousness of Love.
Reflections of imperfections
have shown me a way
that I can move mountains
through my power of faith
even though I can't see him
I know he is real
through the power of prayer
and a Love that I feel
It's growing inside me
like a flower in bloom
shall I reveal my powers
or is it too soon
I am reading the signs
through my darkness I find
a reason for belief in
the light of mankind
that I know shall overcome
the greatest of odds
the Love I seek amazes me
especially through the flaws
because now I am inspired
through the hero's that bring
my throne through the darkness
on which I return on as your King.
Your love is
quite sensational –
Your laughter tastes
like spring-time rain
Your tears smell
like sweet lemon flower petals
Your voice looks
Your heart sounds
like exquisite violin and harp concertos
And your eyes!
Your eyes feel
like early autumn sunset’s amber-gold lengthening glow
Oh, my love, your love
is entirely, completely,
(in memoriam, Eugene Lawler, d. January 29, 2012, aged 83 years)
--- Note: "The singing machine" is a not so tongue-in-cheek reference to Gene and his penchant for singing whenever and wherever he wished, as well as to his karaoke
equipment and his nickname at bars that featured karaoke nights. ---
You fancied yourself a singer,
and indeed you were.
What songs we heard from you
you had made your own,
and you gave them freely
to all who would listen
(though we were just a few
who were, at times, inattentive.)
Time and remembrance may color
the images you left behind,
and the sentimental songs
you sang (and scribed on silver disks
for us to hear when, and if, we will)
may prod us to recall
your willful, dour demeanor
which could bloom into benevolence
or darken further in stormy sneers
at tardiness, or at perceived
maltreatment of any sort.
You were your own arbiter of behavior
who kept before you expectations
of what was appropriate, for yourself
and for us, the others of your kind.
We were few (still fewer now),
who flocked together on occasion
to celebrate, in quiet fashion,
whatever anniversary we chose --
perhaps your passing date
will become another to be marked.
And your voice, reproduced mechanically,
amplified, may remind us of our loss,
and of yours.
In late October the reddest moon didn't change its phase,
it remained in the same spot to watch the witches' ballet;
the loud music matched the mood of the mystical night: tambourines
and flutes frantically played; sneers, jeers, giggles of the ugliest witches
mixed with the goblins' roars while they danced around a huge, hot fire.
I smelled a foul odor, the wild dogs feasted on a bloody oar,
" Leave some for us, or we'll turn you into bats! "
the hunched witch snarled with menacing eyes,
but they roared and threatened her with sharp teeth,
then Olga began to speak Latin words to cast
a spell on them and before it worked, they fled.
Glad that they had left, she dragged the dead animal
and hung it on a long rod to roast on the sparking fire;
hungry witches continued to dance with forks and knives
in their hands, anxiously waiting for their Halloween treat.
Written by Andrew Crisci
for Russel Sivey's contest,
" The Ultimate Halloween Contest "
In a time
When men stood out
Being courageously stout
I saw a man
Raising his children
He was not perfect
But was Gods' elect
He had some flaws
Concerning his laws
But with help
From the Lord
The children grew
And were made new
Becoming Men and Women
Fulfilling Purpose and Destiny
A chosen generation
Sent to the nations
From God above
Just like the dove
Through one man
This man is YOU, Dad
HAPPY FATHERS' DAY
Scaly small lizard
Eats bugs, but not very often
Where’s the beard?
It has no hair
A single horn
From the center of its forehead
Beauty in its essence
Life and death
Are mysterious things
You love a living one
in your Heart,
By your heart
You also love a dead one
But in your Mind, in your memory
When your beloved is no more
When she is dead
Your love shifts places
From Heart to Mind
You want her corpse to be removed
as soon as possible
and buried, burnt in fire
Or left to the vultures
depending on what last ceremonial plan
you believed in
and chose to perform
Living ones are loved
Dead ones too
but death is so scary
that whenever someone dies
one tries to get rid of him atonce!
We were on the road
the road that ended somewhere
something flew right into my eyes
I closed my eyes for a while
but then you were gone
we could have made it
to the end where our dreams
were waiting for us,
but then they were shattered into pieces
somehow you changed,
those pieces were not small enough for you
then you broke them into even smaller pieces
and still all those broken pieces
if it were to be re arranged would
have your name on it
we had our share of fun, laughter
and great memories, that will
walk with me to my deathbed
but now its too late to be reminded it
your face with a stranger
everyday on the electronic screen
I'm still the same way you left me some
four years ago,
and you're not the same person that you were
things have changed,
they've been rearranged
nothing looks familiar anymore
but I still cannot forget those times
and even though I hate you for what you did
how could I forget this day
even if those memories in your head
lay there alone to rust
Happy Birthday to you, old friend
and Happy birthday to us!