Poor Peter Pumpkin had a very itty bitty head.
So the farmer made him stay inside the garden bed.
The farmer said that he was going to keep him warm with hay.
And there the itty bitty pumpkin stayed for many a day.
Finally, the farmer came to check upon poor Peter,
measured him and then exclaimed, “You’ve grown an extra meter!
I think it’s time for you to finally go face the world.”
Peter got up from his bed. He twirled and twirled and twirled!
“Oh my,” the farmer shouted, “You’ve grown two legs with feet!
You’re a special pumpkin. My daughters you must meet!”
Poor Peter heaved his hefty bulk, waddling away,
following behind the farmer so he would not stray.
They traveled rather quickly, and soon they reached the house.
The daughters saw the pumpkin and grew quiet as a mouse.
The silence lasted just until at last one daughter spoke,
“A pumpkin with two legs? Is this some kind of joke?”
Her father knelt beside her and whispered in her ear,
“Do not be afraid, my child. You’ve not a thing to fear.
We can carve a lantern. It will be your Halloween treat.
Then we can make lots of pumpkin pies for us to eat.
Peter trembled and grew chill to hear their horrid plan.
Jumping out the door, he yelled, “Catch me if you can!”
He ran into the pastures. Then he tumbled down a hill.
As he rolled he bumped into the couple, Jack and Jill!
“Oh dear me,” cried Peter, “I do not wish to be
a lantern for this Halloween. Please, can you both help me!”
Jack and Jill then led him to the land of Nursery Rhymes.
His sad fate has now been told to children many times.
For he ran across a guy named Peter Pumpkin EATER.
Maybe you can guess now what became of our poor Peter!
Written by Andrea Dietrich and Jan Allison, for the
Halloween Co-Writes Poetry Contest of Diane Locksley
On the eve of All Saints Day known as Halloween
We've a night where nothing is ever as it seems
Abraham, Martin and John hosted a grand ball
In heaven’s huge castle, a white marble town hall
Dancing and singing just like every other day
One old soul grew weary of celebrating this way
She found nothing special in the harps and trumpets
A more exciting venue she had come to covet
St. Peter partied, his gate was unattended
So to a room below the bored soul descended
A place where heavy metal was all the rave
Deadheads converged to stomp violently on graves
She was tempted to join in their revelry
As demons eyed her with curious envy
One grabbed her halo, howled when it burned his hands
Others confronted her with obscene demands
Only then did she recall escaping this place
When God sacrificed his son, mortal sin to erase
Although hands of the wicked tried to hold her down
She struggled, pushed forward and made her way uptown
Fearfully she cried while knocking on heaven’s gate
St. Peter found her in this emotional state:
“Why didn’t you learn to resist temptation,
During your tenuous Earthly incarnation?”
At a loss for an answer, she pled for mercy
And Peter felt inclined to deem her unworthy
But the Master heard her prayers, granted a reprieve
He blessed her and uttered, “Welcome home again, Eve.”
Her departure from Eden seemed so long ago
And now most certainly one thing she did know
She should have stuck with Adam when he first said, “No”
Instead of bobbing for apples with the demons below
* For Tony Brooks' “Halloween Hustle” contest
Great white bird high in the sky
Take me away, take me away
Off to some exotic land
Take me away, take me away
Fly me off to wonderland
Take me away, take me away
Let me unwind on soft golden sand
Take me away, take me away
Let me forget my cares for a day
Take me away, take me away
In dreamland I just want to stay
Take me away, take me away
27th October 2014
We had just got married - was the month of June
This is the saga of our disastrous honeymoon
We started off in a hotel in Norwich
The bedding was itchy just like doing ‘porridge’
Back home to Birmingham to get ready for our cruise
To the Norwegian Fjords - stunning scenery to peruse
I had already started to get a horrid cold
My sneezing was totally uncontrolled
We arrived in Norway and I was feeling ill
The fjords were smooth no need for sea sickness pill
I started to brighten as we began the cruise
Hubby and me together we had nothing to loose
Enjoying the scenery and the fresh cold air
Watching the waterfalls oh how we did stare
We arrived at the first hotel and got ready for the night
We were on honeymoon and wanted everything right
Climbing the stairs to our hotel room
Separate beds – you could sense the doom
Well we got over that hurdle… details I won’t discus!
But when we saw the tour guide oh how we did cuss
Next day we got onto our honeymoon boat
Enjoying the experience whilst we were afloat
On to another hotel as part of the tour
Separate beds yet again – oh what a bore!
Every hotel we stayed at we had separate beds
Hardly ideal scenario for a pair of newly weds!
Finally it was time for us to go our journey back home
One more meal at the hotel – oh how time had flown
Disaster struck – it could only happen to me
I got food poisoning I was as sick as a flea
Firing from both ends it was absolute hell
My honeymoon disaster – oh I remember it well!
A pretty accurate description of our honeymoon in June 1991…
but despite everything that went wrong we are still together!
Contest: Memorable Vacation – Shadow Hamilton
~awarded 2nd place~
My good friend Jerry’s unemployment had run out
I feared print journalism’s future was in doubt
But while we commiserated on Christmas Eve
A disheartening report was broadcast on TV
Local law enforcement had been busy that day
People found living in the woods had been cast away
These homeless families had set up tents on state land
And police had ordered these squatters to disband
How heartless it seemed that these souls should be tossed out
Poor folks who had nothing and learned to do without
We shut off the TV, couldn’t take it anymore
And headed for a café with joyful décor
Just twenty degrees as we drove down the highway
Where a sight neath a bridge caused far more dismay
A couple and their small child huddled together
Trying hard to stay warm in cold winter weather
Sad images of Bethlehem flashed through my mind
With no room at the inn for the savior of mankind
I looked at my friend and he returned my glance
We both felt this family needed a second chance
“Pull over,” he murmured, “we can’t just leave them here
These folks deserve to share in our holiday cheer”
So money that could have bought steak dinners for two
We used to buy hamburgers for our five-member crew
Some cash left over for a room at Motel Six
Not a real solution – a temporary fix
We returned Christmas Day; our church would take them in
But they had checked out; it was half past eleven
For long I’ve wondered what happened to this family
And what each Christmas holds for those who are needy
*Recollection of Christmas, 2007, when the economy started to fail.
, , , ,
here I am in NYC...packing after a safari –theme night party
with Soup members two nights ago, filled with awed revelry.
shrieks whistling on linked arms during a photo shoot,
as live cheers of Constance and Andrea went “ whoot!”
while Debbie and Michael hosted “Tag, you’re ‘It’ “games
bringing Nikko and Sara to compete in spelling members’ names…
I still remember Robert H. reciting his comic spiels, what a blast!
our jaws locked from clapping at Dr. Ram’s impromptu dance act,
till Kashinath segued into a sitar rap in his flashy jungle attire
prompting Linda to donate PM prizes, much to our hearts’ desire.
on our table, an exciting blend of brew amped repartee’s pitches
amused by Brian fleshing parts of short forms without glitches,
enter wacky Sydney applying geographic values to long verse usage
with footnotes on how worlds expand over time from poetic vantage,
oh, how Gwen sparkled with pleasantries as cups of jokes poured
most memorable of all, the warm personal shares of soupers' world
that drew us closer as real people with scraps here and there
recalling red-cherry days and funny bloopers’ wear and tear…
and as I leave from 8th street hailing a taxi to catch a plane,
notes and album tugged this heart, anticipating next gang’s chain.
, , , , ,
DEDICATED TO P.D: get well soon and take your daily dose your soup!
*notes: with admiration for soup members included herein... all in the
name of pure fun!
* Gwendolyn Rix, Brian Strand, Sydney Peck, Myself
* For Michael Falotico’s Table for Four/ P.D Soup Contest
* by nette onclaud
He was a very handsome lad
A very good life he had
Out proud he held his chest
More beautiful then the rest
So it was him that we picked
The others were very ticked
They didn't realize how lucky they were
As we took Tom and walked out the door
I sat here today and my fingers I did lick
This was the best turkey we ever picked
Your Choice Verse contest
for Brian Strand
Came home just the other day
Caught my kitties well at play
Cats like to climb up trees it's true
They have the Christmas spirit too!
But not my lovely Christmas tree!
They looked as innocent as can be
With ornaments hanging off his nose
One came out smelling like a rose
For his little sister was worse than that
She was a silver garland-wrapped cat!
Oh they had such fun 'til I came home
Their saucer eyes so brightly shone
I couldn't stay mad for very long
Soon was singing a different song
Found the camera and flashed some shots
Cleaning up all the messy spots
Re-hung the ornaments on the tree
Again it was lovely as could be!
I bought all the candy for Halloween night,
Into the cupboard, it sat in plain sight
When later I looked, I just about flipped!
I saw empty wrappings, the bags were all ripped!
The treats were all missing,...so back to the store
I bought several bags, at least three or four.
Now back in my kitchen, I climbed on a chair
To hide them up high on a shelf that was bare...
Behind an old crock pot that he'd never use...
But would you believe, he discovered my ruse?!!!
The big night arrived and much to my grief
The candy had been eaten by that darn sweet toothed thief!!!!
The door bell was ringing, trick-or-treaters had come
I ducked out the back door, and fast did I run!!
Right back to the store, I flew like a witch...
The clerks heard me cursing, like a grouchy old b - - - -!
The store had no candy, sold out every piece
No Big Hunks, no Snickers, no Hersheys or Reese
I bought bags of apples.... gave them out in disgrace
Every kid on the block had disgust on his face
The next Halloween, I'm not buying ahead
I'm a last minute shopper for the candy, instead..
And to all you folks, who buy treats in advance
My advice to you all, is don't take such a chance!
Something else you should learn, from this frustrating tale...,
Next time you buy candy, attach some loud bells!!
------------ P.S.... (A Moral to the story, for an evening so gory)....
He was licking his chops, while he had his sweet binge
But goblins were watching, ........and took their revenge....
That Halloween scrooge...Mr. Thief in the Night
He chipped his back molar, as he took that last bite!!
Submitted for "Funny Spooks" contest
Sponsored by Carol Brown
The tragedy of a Miracle started today
Our Lord’s brutalized body passed away
Of all the tragedies in the history of man
This is one I try to grasp, but never can
For some reason I find it impossible to see
We crucified the greatest man in our history
Through all of the gain and all of the loss
It was a predestined coin man had to toss
I wonder how Pilot must have felt that day
He washed cowards hands in a cowardly way
Beaten and tortured, his skin ripped to shreds
As a thorny crown dug holes into Jesus’ head
While nailed to the cross he had one final goal
Through the mercy of love he saved another soul
He saved that soul and then our Lord Jesus died
Can you imagine the countless tears that were cried?
As we all know Jesus' body was placed into a tomb
To my minds eye it was no less than a spiritual womb
And from inside that womb salvation was born
For the tomb was found empty come Sunday morn
This is not how the story ends it is only how it starts
The Lord now lives up inside each one of our hearts
Even those lost in Prison, the ones like I used to be
Can turn to the Lord and then they will be set free
Freedom is a thing that I think we all strive to find
It is etched in our heart and engraved in our mind
I was locked up in a cell nestled tightly away
Facing several years that I would have to pay
Up inside of that cell I made my own decree
A true miracle was taking place inside of me
I was a very evil man and I was so proud to show it
In the wink of an eye I was transformed into a Poet
I learned there is only one way to truly be free
Ask of the Lord, “ Jesus please come unto me”
And just as the Lord Jesus Christ rose up out of his tomb
We can all live with-in the comfort of his spiritual womb
This poem covers the greatest story ever told
Greater than all the kings and all their gold
This story will bring about deep reflection
Starting with the Immaculate Conception
Of all the stories this is the greatest of all
A complex child born in a simple stall
Quickly the news covered the land
A virgin would be Gods right hand
Inside of her womb a God to a son
Imagine this story has just begun
Everyone knew this child was born to design
Just open your heart and look for the sign
Harrod was driven by fear of not being so great
The first-born son was Harrods fate
Jesus escaped the King and awaited the call
To become the greatest glory of all
This is my master this is our Lord
He is the wielder and we are the sword
He chose his disciples of simple men
Hear tell one was straight out of the pen
The Pharisees called on Pilot the king
At the end he said, “I wash my hands of this thing”
I wonder if when Pilot stepped up to the gate
Jesus washed his hands to seal Pilots fate
Or if he opened his arms to welcome him in
Forgiving Pilot of all of his sins
We took our Lord then nailed him to the cross
As far as humanity that was our greatest loss
But through all the loss just look at the gain
Bought by our Lord through sacrifice and pain
Over 2000 years after this child was born
He came to the prison to make my heart warm
Gave me a gift then our Lord set me free
I reckon the rest would be up to me
As you dress up the tree and hang up the lights
Think of the story of our Lords plight
MRS. CATHY NEEDS SOME SNOW
I called up the thunder; I called up the rain;
I left a message; and gave them your name.
I left a deposit; at Your Rent to Own;
As soon as they get some; they'll deliver it home.
I e mailed the Governor; with request for some snow;
But nobody answered; they're busy you know.
Frosty the Snowman; says he'll try his best;
To grant you your wishes; for this special request.
I got in my car; and drove in the dark;
To that special place; where angels do hark.
I entered the union; of Unity Hall;
They said they can do it; they'll give you a call.
At Natural Disasters; they all agreed;
They guaranteed me; you'd get what you need.
I yelled up to Heaven; I asked for the boss;
St.Peter then told me; for you there's no cost.
Early this morning; was a knock on my door;
Good God it was Elvis; singing let the snow pour.
Cathy my dearest; worry do not;
Sweet heart I'm on it, with all that I got.
With His deathbed, He staggers straight up a bleak hill.
Bless those who will help him as the others stand still.
So reluctant to shoulder the harsh timber He bore,
We all remember his name and the rest we ignore.
This woman’s small gesture in defying the crowd,
Refutes modern science, embossed on a shroud.
Near the end, his expression of truth and belief
Mark him always as good for he died as a thief.
For these smallest of mercies they did for a Lamb
Intercede for us, always, to the one called “I AM.”
Little pumpkin very sad
for in white he'd been clad
To be a lantern was his dream
but woeful he was white as cream
So I said, to his delight,
that I liked his coat of white
Now, because I liked him most,
my Jack O' Lantern is a ghost
Inspired by Raul Morenos' White Pumpkin contest
I'm borrowing a gorgeous country
I may borrow it as often as I can
I accept their courtesy and smile
I smile back and are happy to provide a helping hand
I am enjoying the sun in this sunny land
I think of autumn and the rain back home
I'm enjoying the day with all my enjoyment
I hope the day could've been much longer
I am delighted with the floral scent that fills the air
I listen to the waves rolling along the seaside
I listen to the prayer that comes from the mosque
I feel a quiet peace lowered into my body
I'm borrowing this beautiful country, just for fourteen days
I am free of thoughts, free from time ..... I'm in my paradise Turkey
Turkey - 20.09.2012
A-L Andresen :)
Copyright © All Rights Reserved
2011 was here but is now gone away
2012 is here now with one extra day
I am not going to make a resolution
Simply because it causes me confusion
Wishing the best to all I hold dear
Joy,love,good health for this year
I cherish the Christmas time of the year.
People are in the streets grinning ear to ear.
Children faces light up with joy.
Pondering on their favorite toy.
This the season we remember to give and share.
It is a way to let others know we really care.
We are told wise men came to a manger to seek
Later wise men would hear this child speak.
If I had but one Christmas wish,
It would be for you to know a Christmas bliss.
Edward J Ebbs - Christmas 2003
My youngest child taught me something today
That I had almost forgotten along the way
At this precious age the focus isn’t money
Or finding the promised land of milk and honey
As soon as we decorated our Christmas tree
She placed a gift beneath it saying, “For mommy from me”
It wasn’t a gift from a catalog or store
This special gift was so much more
She ran to her room, found her favorite toy, you see
Then placed it in a cracker box and gave it to me
No wrappings or ribbons just the heart of my child
With glowing eyes and a tender loving smile
That, my friends, is how Christmas should be
Because the best gifts aren’t found beneath the tree
Copyright © 2009 Lena “Lolita” Townsend
“…and a little child will lead them.”~ Isaiah 11:6
I do believe in Santa Claus.
Although I'm scared he'll see my flaws.
I think he knows I pick my nose
and play with jam between my toes.
He probably knows I bite my nails
and burp and fart to no avails'
But what I know for sure is strange.
That I am stubborn and will not change.
I do believe in Santa Claus
who sees me when I'm sleeping.
And hide beneath my pillow
when I think that he is peeking.
I know I've made the naughty list
and even changed my name.
Unless he knows my old address
and holds me to my shame.
I do believe in Santa Claus...
but I am cautious just the same.
I thought I would just say
Have a Happy Thanksgiving Day!
For all of You Souper people are
In my estimation, the ones who care.
It is wonderful to have your comments, too
When I write something here for all of you.
The joy of reading your works and words
Goes well beyond the things I've heard.
And in the short time that I have around you
Friendships through words abound, too.
I say that you are the cheeriest bunch
With whom I have never sat down to lunch.
But I'll say a prayer of thanksgiving for all
And hope that the Lord hears my call.
For tomorrow when we remember the good things in life
I'll count all of you in, with a thought none too brief.
With you I feel like I am a true part,
So, I say "Thank You All, from the bottom of my heart".
I was the youngest kid of eight
Halloween was never that great
Orange clown shoes were too big
An old purple horrendous witch's wig
My sisters tutu I that wouldn't use
My brothers cape smelled of doo doo
Superman pants that didn't latch
And that makeup covered eye patch
That Halloween I knocked on this door
The lady was laughing and kicked the floor
Her husband then came around to peek
Then laugh so hard his knees got weak
She said "Oh honey, let's give him the lot"
He agreed, only if I posed for a snapshot
She said "you stay right there, don't move"
I took off so fast, I lost my clown shoes
I was enjoining my afternoon siesta
Just wearing my knickers no vest’a
When the noise of the fire bell arose
Oh heck I was wearing few clothes
My hubby said ‘Jan that’s the bell’
I said ‘On no!’ With a yell
I jumped out of bed with a leap
Found all my clothes in a heap
I struggled to find my white vest
(It covers my large hairy chest)
Phew! The sound of the bell it did stop
So back into bed I did hop
30th October 2014
I'm wondering how far down in this featherbed I can sink
Late December skies are changing from gray to pink
Heavy frost covers winter's lifeless ground
Roosters crowing - the only sound
Christmas is over and I had fun
Love my family, but glad it's done
I feel as stuffed as the Thanksgiving turkey
But want more of mom's home made candy
I think I'll just lay here and snooze all day
But wait......the smell of coffee is drifting this way...:-)
In The Moment
Town malls are cluttered with Christmas shoppers,
toting packages of last-minute-list-droppers.
Carols echo from high pillared ceiling,
leaving one and all with a charitable feeling.
Door frames draped with assorted Christmas light,
center stands a lit tree, what a glorious sight.
Children align mall walls waiting for Santa Claus,
to listen to their wishes and wants, just because.
Long grueling lines wind through department aisles,
confirming it is Christmas with occasional smiles.
Feet are aching from walks to distant shop,
shoppers sitting on benches, some refuse to stop.
Copyright © 2011 By Caryl S. Muzzey
It's my turn to burn the turkey this year.
We'll all drink too much and end up in tears.
Relatives we love and those we hate
Will all show up, there'll be a debate.
Cranberry sauce or Cranberry jelly?
Would serve them all right if I didn't serve any.
At least one item I love will be broken.
At least one thing said should not have been spoken.
We'll start with compliments, lies of course,
Sing off key, laugh till we're hoarse.
Try to keep the arguing down to a dull roar.
Watch out for Uncle Harold, the man is a boor.
The children are the best behaved of the lot.
Uncle Harold's now loaded, the man is a sot.
Would everyone please just sit down and eat
And why does everyone want the white meat?
Two more glasses of wine and I will get through it.
Next year it's Mexico. Family? ..Well screw it.
Purely fictional, meant in humor , please take it as it is, a joke
You Inspire Me
What inspires me?
A song lyric-------a brave, determined person (Man or Woman)
A gifted child
An Innovator, innovators are individuals that are firsts to do something.
That inspires me and by the way…
O mother you inspire me (most of all)!
Two teachers were given this precious gift, with your guiding hands.
One daughter they named Mali and she has all your lesson plans.
To choose the best for Mali, with all the fear and doubt you raised.
This gauntlet that was posed and run is a testament of their praise.
They have surmounted each obstacle and hurdle that was made.
With fear and doubt they have fought so, she won't be dismayed.
Lets pray, a long life for this child, breathing this earths fresh air
Creating a deafening echo from all of us repeating the same prayer
I'm seeking a miracle for two teachers, a parents simple request
Mali wins life after BMT, defeating Hurlers Syndrome, is my request
That these two children grow together to live a long and happy life
Would be Grandpa's wish for his Christmas, in this world of strife
May tranquility reign and grace your Thanksgiving board this year,
As you thank the Good Lord for all the blessings you hold dear!
I pray that it will be a time of good cheer and not a free-for-all,
As in the dysfunctional family described below, ending in a brawl!
Grandpa said grace that rambled on interminably while stomachs growl.
Grandma had heard enough of that and poked him with a warning scowl!
Pompous Uncle Blimp boasted about the democrats winning the election,
While saner heads steered the conversation in a more innocuous direction!
Ne'er-do-well Cousin Cletus who was recently released from prison,
Wailed about being falsely imprisoned saying the cannabis wasn't his'n!
Aunt Louise complained that she didn't get the turkey gizzard as was her due!
Dad was happily sozzled having consumed too much of his homemade brew!
Little Marvin slopped gravy on grandma's prized heirloom tablecloth!
Nana screeched about controlling your brats - she was most visibly wroth!
The kid howled and mommy hugged him saying, "It was not your fault!"
In the aftermath, little was said except an occasional, "Pass the salt!"
Elbows flew and the hapless turkey's carcass was stripped clean and bare!
Grandpa removed his teeth to take a snooze, fed up with the whole affair!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved
Happy Holiday to each and everyone of you
May your hopes and your dreams for the new year all come true
It'a magical time for children of all ages
To show how much we care and try to remember the reason we are all here
To love and show compassion
Not just at holiday time
But all through the coming year after year