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Trying To Hold On To the Past

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I never expected it to be easy but by clearing the home in some ways I feel like I am losing mum as well and that is quite heartbreaking. Hugs Jan xx

Mum, I never dreamed our lives would be so tough I want to run away, I’ve just about had enough Once you had a husband and you were a wife Now we’re clearing out relics of your life For six months now you’ve been in a home Dad has passed away but you are never alone Now the house has been sold and we must clear All those precious things you once held so dear We’ve got to be strong and see it right through Sadly it’s a difficult job we have got to do We cannot continue to hold onto the past Still our memories remain and forever will last 29th August 2015

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James Fraser

Date: 11/21/2015 2:38:00 PM

Sad within the realities of life. Jan, your writing doesn't just excite, it soothes, and that's quite special ~~~~ xx ~~ James ~~ xx ~~~~ <*> Septembers comments tomorrow night, our Sunday :)

Jan Allison
Date: 11/21/2015 6:23:00 PM

Thanks James I truly have no control over where my muse will take me and that is what I find so exciting about writing:-) hugs jan xx

Robert Nehls

Date: 9/28/2015 5:55:00 AM

Hi Jan. This is a very moving and heartfelt poem you have shared with us. That must be so difficult to be clearing out your moms belongings. It is truly a sad time but the most important parts of the past are the love and joy that was shared. Please try to be strong and may god bless you.... Robert.

Jan Allison
Date: 9/28/2015 6:14:00 AM

The house was totally cleared by the auction company - so heartbreaking to think of something you held so dear is worthless to anyone else... but we have to let go and move on and I am blessed to still have mum:-) hugs jan xx

Sandra Haight

Date: 9/15/2015 3:14:00 PM

Hi Jan, stopping back to congratulate you for your 2nd Place win for your emotional, sad write. Hugs, Sandra

Jan Allison
Date: 9/15/2015 3:22:00 PM

Thanks Sandra it is an incredibly emotional time for me at the moment but the house must be cleared pending sale:-( hugs jan xx

Skat A

Date: 9/14/2015 12:54:00 PM

Jan, Congratulations on your win, SKAT

Jan Allison
Date: 9/14/2015 1:01:00 PM

Thanks Skat:-) hugs Jan xx

Tim Smith

Date: 9/12/2015 6:00:00 PM

Congratulations Jan on the big win

Jan Allison
Date: 9/12/2015 6:07:00 PM

Thanks Tim:-) hugs Jan xx

Paul Callus

Date: 9/12/2015 9:34:00 AM

Pleased to see this poem flying high on the winners' list, Jan! Congratulations:) [Been so busy...!] Hugs // paul

Jan Allison
Date: 9/12/2015 9:48:00 AM

Thanks Paul... I've been busy clearing the house but not today we have been gardening at home as the weather is lovely .. there is only so much I can do!:-( hugs jan xx

Kp Nunez

Date: 9/11/2015 11:04:00 PM

Back to read this moving write and to congratulate you on for your great win! hugs! PS. Been so busy lately...was not even aware of this contest.

Jan Allison
Date: 9/12/2015 6:14:00 AM

Thanks Kim:-) chat soon:-) hugs Jan xx

Kim Merryman

Date: 9/11/2015 8:27:00 PM

I've been through the same thing, Jan. It is a difficult situation with all manner of emotions involved. You expressed your feelings well in your poem! Congrats on your win! Love, Kim

Jan Allison
Date: 9/12/2015 6:14:00 AM

Thanks Kim it is very tough going:-( hugs Jan xx

Sandra Haight

Date: 9/11/2015 8:11:00 PM

Dear Jan, your poem is very moving...it echoes the emotions so many have to endure in their own lifetimes. You've expressed this sadness so well. Congratulations on our fine win. Hugs, Sandra

Jan Allison
Date: 9/12/2015 6:13:00 AM

Thanks Sandra its an on going process at the moment and it is hard:-( hugs Jan xx

Eve Roper

Date: 9/11/2015 4:31:00 PM

Back to congratulate you on your win. Hugs Eve

Jan Allison
Date: 9/11/2015 4:34:00 PM

Thanks Eve I was at the house twice today - the heartache continues until it is cleared hopefully then things will be easier:-) hugs Jan xx

Joseph May

Date: 9/11/2015 3:53:00 PM

A heartfelt write Jan...Congrats on the win

Jan Allison
Date: 9/11/2015 4:00:00 PM

Thanks Joseph:-) hugs jan xx

Caycay Jennings

Date: 9/11/2015 4:41:00 AM

I have gone / am going through this. It is definitely one of life's sad seasons. We aren't sure 'how to get it right', a balancing act of logistics and emotions that bruise. I'll be thinking of you. Oh, first line of last stanza, I'm sure you want to insert "to" ... got to be. Be easy on yourself ... CayCay

Jan Allison
Date: 9/11/2015 6:50:00 AM

Thanks Caycay I've just come back with mum - continuing to clear the house its simply heartbreaking throwing 'treasured' memories and items away but we have to be hard and then let the house clearance people take away the rest and get a bit more money for it:-( will add to to the stanza - thanks:-) hugs Jan xx

Duke Beaufort

Date: 9/8/2015 6:19:00 PM

You have this exactly right. It is hard, but we do have to move ahead. There are no enduring physical manifestations--they all gradually or even quickly deteriorate. Sad but true.

Jan Allison
Date: 9/9/2015 1:05:00 AM

It is VERY hard on me but I have to do it we can't hold on to the past and need the money from the house sale to pay mum's care home fees:-( hugs jan xx

Mama Bear

Date: 9/4/2015 3:15:00 PM

The hard thing is to let go of stuff It has memories but it is only stuff. Your mum is still there and that is worth more than the things you are letting go. Hope she is happy and getting used to being with out Dad It is hard to say good bye to what we once knew and it will be harder if Mum was gone too. Keep on holding on and hugging her and forget about how hard it is to get rid of stuff. You never lose love and that is the important stuff. Love and hugs Edith

Jan Allison
Date: 9/4/2015 3:18:00 PM

Wise words indeed Mama Bear - it is almost like I am losing mum getting rid of so much but we still have each other and that is the important thing - these are material possessions we still have our memories:-) hugs jan xx

Judy Konos

Date: 8/31/2015 4:27:00 PM

All the best good wishes for your mom's new home. May she find many new friends to share her life with and may God continue to bestow his blessings upon her and your entire family

Jan Allison
Date: 8/31/2015 4:33:00 PM

Thanks Judy she is settled in the care home she moved into in March we are just selling the family home is so so tough so many memories and not enough room for everything she would love to keep:-( hugs jan xx

Ravi Sathasivam

Date: 8/30/2015 7:35:00 AM

Excellent. Very deep and beautifully expressed. .Enjoyed. Thanks for sharing it.

Jan Allison
Date: 8/30/2015 9:58:00 AM

Thanks Ravi. I very much enjoyed your wise words on your poem today :-) hugs Jan xx

Demetrios Trifiatis

Date: 8/30/2015 6:52:00 AM

Very moving and powerful poem so beautifully expressed, dear Jan. Despite the pain in our hearts we have to advance in life. Fortunately the clearing of the house is done by you and not by other forces as it happens to many parts of the world!

Jan Allison
Date: 8/30/2015 6:55:00 AM

We are going every day clearing cupboards and drawers - very difficult time for us both but it has to be done:-( hugs Jan xx

Franco Gonza

Date: 8/30/2015 3:55:00 AM

I am deeply moved by your intimate feelings, Jan. This was taken from the heart and soul while I remember the passing of my father some years go. Thank you for taking time to read my works. Condolences and prayers.

Jan Allison
Date: 8/30/2015 4:00:00 AM

Thanks Franco yes it is written straight from the heart - I do not know how I would have coped with issues in my life if i hadn't started writing poetry about 18 months ago:-) hugs Jan xx

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 8/29/2015 5:32:00 PM

oh boy, my time for this will be coming up maybe in 20 to 30 years.Hopefully not before that, but one never knows. It's so difficult to clear up our lives, which includes the material relics. Oh my I don't even want to think of it. Good poem, Jan, very good. the capcha reads "her")

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2015 6:30:00 PM

Oh Andrea I love it when Captcha's are meaningful. With so many other things going on in my life you can guess how hard emotionally this is:-( hugs Jan xx

Paul Callus

Date: 8/29/2015 2:01:00 PM

Hi Jan! Many of the things in a house constitute a lifetime of memories. Some tough decisions must be made, especially since your mum is still alive. Take your time, while being practical without being unkind. Hugs // paul

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2015 6:29:00 PM

You have ht the nail on the head Paul but trying to get the contents of a house into one room in a care home is impossible and lots of things have to go:-( hugs jan xx

Kp Nunez

Date: 8/29/2015 11:50:00 AM

A well written emotive write that so many can relate to, Jan. You've said it all and I can only agree. hugs!

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2015 11:59:00 AM

Thanks Kim :-) hugs Jan xx

Josefina Costales

Date: 8/29/2015 9:22:00 AM

Sad and poignant. You make holding on to the past a very brave act. Moving on is often very difficult

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2015 9:25:00 AM

I am finding it so draining emotionally not sad I am having to be strong for mum but just the act of helping mum clear her house is so so difficult I am sure many people can relate to what I am going through:-( Hugs Jan x

Eve Roper

Date: 8/29/2015 12:15:00 AM

Wonderful write, Jan, you have said it very well of the emotions one goes through those rough times. Hugs sweet Friend

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2015 1:06:00 AM

Thanks Eve I simply hate having to do it:-( hugs jan xx

Arthur Vaso

Date: 8/28/2015 8:57:00 PM

Well, this is beautiful and even knowing the story, this really applies to so many of life's tribulations! Well done!

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2015 2:13:00 AM

:-) thanks Arthur I am blessed to have the support of some wonderful people who have helped me so much through the most difficult periods of my life - I know if I hadn't started writing poetry I would have found it pretty difficult to cope with everything that has been thrown at me especially over the last year:-) hugs Jan xx

Arthur Vaso
Date: 8/29/2015 1:21:00 AM

I am happy you are, however, I hope you know, you have my support and many here! :) Hugs

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2015 1:05:00 AM

Yes I agree Arthur it applies to many - I just had to put it into words to reflect my situation - it is emotionally tough but am coping pretty well I don't get teary and still smile:-) :-) hugs jan xx

Theresa Cw

Date: 8/28/2015 8:43:00 PM

My heart is breaking and crying for you dear Jan, if I stay and comment more. I fear I will just start to cry and won't be able to stop these tears I thus cry. Be and stay strong, for I feel you're a very strong heart and aptitude. Just hold onto those all sweet memories..... Hugs and wishes. 7x over.... Theresa

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2015 1:03:00 AM

It;s worse clearing out as mum is very much with us - it's like I'm losing her too in a way - having to make decisions for her is the hardest thing I have ever had to do:-( hugs jan xx