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Soul, Breeze, Echo

Ruben O. Avatar Ruben O. - LIFETIME Premium Member Ruben O. - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Soul, Breeze, Echo which was written by poet Ruben O.. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Soul, Breeze, Echo

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                             Absolve the sound
                             its reflection, my repetition:
                             I came slave — flame
                             with the wind — blind

                             Mud in footprint — looking	
                             To place bricks in a row — I owe	
                             To bend over backwards			
                             To forget — I sweat
				
                             Don't say a word — sword			
                             allow me — free				
                             to light the moon — soon				
                             from the period to which all belong

                             I could have done some more
                             Don't say a word — unheard			
                             allow me — Could it be?
                             a mark burned in my tongue — dung

                             I sold myself to the future
                             wound and suture				   
                             and I stayed slave
                             as an aimless compass. Alas!

                             a weathervane in a storm			
                             So did youth — truth				
                             So do tears — fears 
                             I couldn't keep trying

                             I ought to have been inside out
                             I couldn't shout
                             Don’t say a word — it’s absurd
                             allow the breeze to sneeze 
                             our dust — our rust

                             When will the end end?
                             My hands so poor — pure
                             through every pore — gore			
                             will you close the door? — sore?
		
                             At least ... at most ... at last
                             will you bury me?
                             because, leave? — live?
                             I can't ... I can't ...












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  1. Date: 3/22/2015 9:21:00 AM
    Should have been top three my friend.. Your pen is deep and your ink beautiful!

  1. Date: 3/21/2015 10:21:00 AM
    Whaaaa ??????? An HM ??????????? No way !!!!!!!! You are one talent I can only hope to learn from...... Anyone reading this more than once can see the true depth of you and your pen....

  1. Date: 3/19/2015 10:04:00 PM
    check your soupmail in a few minutes :)

  1. Date: 3/19/2015 4:46:00 PM
    Hey! :) There you are, I was wondering... I have missed your smiling face around here. Love and hugs, catie :)

    O. Avatar Ruben O.
    Date: 3/19/2015 4:52:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    No, it's not. : D You're the one who's awesome. How are you, dear Catie? <3<3<3
    O. Avatar Ruben O.
    Date: 3/19/2015 4:49:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Lindsey Avatar Catie Lindsey
    Date: 3/19/2015 4:47:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Oh yeah, oops. Congratulations on your win in the contest. It IS an awesome poem. :)
  1. Date: 4/13/2014 12:06:00 PM
    Congrats on your win, a powerful poem with a lot of depth when taking the time to absorb its message

  1. Date: 4/11/2014 7:46:00 PM
    It is me again, visiting your GEM poem here for the second or third time. CONGRATS, Ruben. You deserve it.

  1. Date: 4/11/2014 4:31:00 PM
    very interesting and modernistic, as so many of your poems are, and it almost seems like a new kind of form - a rubenesque! I loved the play of words - congrats on your win in my contest :)

  1. Date: 3/13/2014 10:25:00 AM
    Hi Ruben, sometimes the poetry can be so good that I just don't quite know how to vomment. This seems like one of those times my friend. This piece touches the heart, touches the Soul. Sorry, all I can say is excellent. Have a good day, catch you later. Your Friend always....MIKE.

  1. Date: 11/21/2012 3:54:00 PM
    Oh, Ruben, you do worry my heart.... Your words speck softly to me, revealing pain and sorrow. I do wish for your true happiness always. Hope you know that! So... until next time...love and hugs, catie :)

  1. Date: 6/14/2010 9:20:00 PM
    Intersting how you combined rhyme with the free verse in this one. It's obvious how much you love words! thanks for your blog comments to my candy blog too. You little almond joy, you!!!

  1. Date: 2/8/2010 5:08:00 PM
    such a searching striving verse! Light & Love

  1. Date: 2/8/2010 5:08:00 PM
    such a searching striving verse! Light & Love

  1. Date: 9/11/2009 3:58:00 AM
    you can live.Celina

  1. Date: 7/18/2009 6:12:00 PM
    Ruben,..such a fine write friend and congratulations having it featured !!! james

  1. Date: 7/18/2009 2:43:00 AM
    cong. on being feature,well deserved feature-you re the best--charma

  1. Date: 7/15/2009 1:19:00 PM
    Absolutley amazing. This is one of few poems I've read that I have really been flabergasted over. Good job.

  1. Date: 7/15/2009 8:24:00 AM
    Congratulations on your poem being featured this week.

  1. Date: 7/14/2009 2:19:00 PM
    Ruben, congrats on your feature...Raul

  1. Date: 7/13/2009 7:03:00 PM
    great feature! Ruben! love the leaps following the pauses! really cool effect! and thanks for your kind comments on all my work!! jim

  1. Date: 7/13/2009 3:57:00 PM
    Congratulations on your well deserved featured poem this week Ruben. Love, Carol

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