I Need a Soul

I've lived a pain that horrifies me in reflection and ran so deep that it changed my DNA. I need a soul who sees the courage that it took for me to live day by day with this pain because I knew that my children needed their father. I need a soul who realizes that I was not born with my kindness, but that it came at a price. I need a soul who has had her own pain. And like me did not let it conquer her love. I need a soul who cares nothing of titles, but revels in my insight into her daily trials. I need a soul who loves to laugh, but loves to cry more. I need a soul who seeks to love with such passion, that her eyes cry out to God for more compassion. I need a soul who has a mind subtle enough to grasp the mystery of our circumstance and so judge no man for their belief. I need a soul who puts up with my recurrent pot belly, depending upon whether I am in "exercise season" or not. I need a soul who loves the sun, but can make the best of the rain. I need a soul who despises shame, but is contrite for a wrong in moments. I need not a housekeeper or surrogate parent, for I know how to raise my children. But I need a soul who will listen to my rantings all night long, and call herself blessed for the experience. I need a soul, who loves the world, but never lets it define her. I need a soul who wants me but who will leave me in an instant if I violate her sanctity. I need a soul who sees me when she looks into my eyes, and whose eyes speak volumes to me. Until I find her, I will walk this path with the many who love me, but always with a longing for my beloved. Always with a longing for that soul, with whom I grow old and ugly. Perhaps I have already grown ugly, and old will have to suffice. I need a soul.