Black

Enveloped in black Darkness of a living death The black shroud tightens Heightened frenzy of thrashing Pinned in the arms of Black Knight For Andrea's Color Tanka Contest May 14, 2013

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

David Scott

Date: 6/10/2013 12:05:00 PM

I LIKE THE COLOUR BLACK LOVE YOUR WRITE XX DAVIDSCOTT

Eileen Manassian
Date: 6/10/2013 12:09:00 PM

Why thank you, David. Glad you stopped by!

Timothy Hicks

Date: 5/15/2013 3:32:00 PM

I wish to explain myself on The Nameless. It was based off a Lovecraft story I read awhile back. I was wanting it all to feel like one big facade, the world as he knows it, coming apart at the seems. Why? Who knows... like Lovecraft's stories he never explains the why, which is the reason they are so eerie.

Eileen Manassian
Date: 5/15/2013 3:37:00 PM

OH! Thanks for the explanation! :) I did get that eerie feeling with yours! You did well!

Painted Hunter

Date: 5/15/2013 6:57:00 AM

Hey you! How the heck are ya? This is great, Eileen. I especially love it because black (outside of camo) is my favorite color. I was going to do one for this contest but it never really took off for me...I had black in mind, though.

Eileen Manassian
Date: 5/15/2013 7:02:00 AM

You know what they say....Great MINDS think alike! :) Missed ya!

Timothy Hicks

Date: 5/14/2013 11:52:00 PM

Very creative entry! I'm not sure if I feel more imprisoned or protected... just what is this black knight's true intentions? he he he... I'm not sure why, but I figured if you would do the contest it would have been Pink or Purple... surprised to see you do Black though... you're surprisingly unpredictable sometimes... lol!

Eileen Manassian
Date: 5/15/2013 5:48:00 AM

Well...I was going more for the imprisoned bit with the last line reading pinned in his arms. Well...PURPLE is my favorite color, then pink so you got that right, but I wrote one on purple and thought it was a Tanka when it was a Sedoka...so I didn't want to revise. Just found a new thing...AND good to be unpredictable. Keeps interest going, yes?

Richard D Seal

Date: 5/14/2013 5:46:00 PM

Hmmm is black actually a colour my little Desert Orchid, trust you to be awkward, lol, yes I think you've done all right here. You do like your Knights, shiny or dark ha ha. Take care, Richard

Eileen Manassian
Date: 5/15/2013 5:50:00 AM

Well, if you must be difficult...white is the absence of light and black is the presence of all colors, but...really Richard...must you be difficult??? ;) Perhaps you've gone from dragon slayer to dark knight? Can't keep up with you! I think I like you being a gardener who tends to his flowers the best! :)

Demetrios Trifiatis

Date: 5/14/2013 3:05:00 PM

Excellent! H.M. Good luck, athough not necessary!

Eileen Manassian
Date: 5/15/2013 5:51:00 AM

From you, always necessary, my dear poet! :) I value your high marks greatly!

Heather Ober

Date: 5/14/2013 9:38:00 AM

Wow!! Very creative entry for Andrea's contest. You should write tanka more often, lady! :)

Eileen Manassian
Date: 5/14/2013 11:54:00 AM

I've missed you, Heather! :) Thanks for the visit!

Poet Tacito

Date: 5/14/2013 7:17:00 AM

The darkness, shines. This was very intense.

Barbara Gorelick

Date: 5/14/2013 7:02:00 AM

quite the description of black! A bit on the dark side...lol. enjoyed. BG

Eileen Manassian
Date: 5/15/2013 5:46:00 AM

Thanks Barbara....thought I'd be a little on the dark side! I usually write romantic mush! A change is always good! :)

Russell Sivey

Date: 5/14/2013 6:07:00 AM

This is quite a brilliant dark poem...dark only as the color my friend! It is a truly wonderful piece, one that I enjoyed reading immensely this morning! What a powerful poem, a intriguing write, Great Work!!

Eileen Manassian
Date: 5/15/2013 5:45:00 AM

Well...I'd done a sedoka on purple...cause I thought I was writing a Tanka...imagine. So...had to go with another theme and I thought...why not? Thanks for the visit! :) I appreciate it.