Anyone who clings to the historically untrue - and thoroughly immoral - doctrine that violence never settles anything I would advise to conjure up the ghosts of Napoleon Bonaparte and the duke of Wellington and let them debate it. The ghost of Hitler would referee. Violence, naked force, has settled more issues in history than any other factor, and the contrary opinion is wishful thinking at its worst. Breeds that forgot this basic truth have always paid for it with their lives and there freedoms.
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The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive.
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Cheops' Law: Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.
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Small change can often be found under seat cushions.
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Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks.
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Sex should be friendly. Otherwise stick to mechanical toys; it's more sanitary.
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In the absence of clearly-defined goals, we become strangely loyal to performing daily trivia until ultimately we become enslaved by it.
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If it can't be expressed in figures, it is not science; it is opinion.
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A long and wicked life followed by five minutes of perfect grace gets you into Heaven. An equally long life of decent living and good works followed by one outburst of taking the name of the lord in vain-- then have a heart attack at that moment and be damned for eternity. Is that the system?
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By the data to date, there is only one animal in the Galaxy dangerous to man-man himself. So he must supply his own indispensable competition. He has no enemy to help him.
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History does not record anywhere at any time a religion that has any rational basis. Religion is a crutch for people not strong enough to stand up to the unknown without help. But, like dandruff, most people do have a religion and spend time and money on it and seem to derive considerable pleasure from fiddling with it.
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A poet who reads his verse in public may have other nasty habits.
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People who go broke in a big way never miss any meals. It is the poor jerk who is shy a half slug who must tighten his belt.
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Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.... Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition. The immature mind often mistakes one for the other, or assumes that the greater the love the greater the jealousy.
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Money is a powerful aphrodisiac. But flowers work almost as well.
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Get a shot off fast. This upsets him long enough to let you make your second shot perfect.
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A generation which ignores history has no past and no future.
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That old saw about the early bird just proves that the worm should have stayed in bed.
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Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwards.
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Sin lies only in hurting other people unnecessarily. All other 'sins' are invented nonsense
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Sex without love is merely healthy exercise
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Specialization is for insects.
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Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea
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A motion to adjourn is always in order.
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To be matter of fact about the world is to blunder into fantasy -- and dull fantasy at that, as the real world is strange and wonderful.
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