Poetry Forum

hjquinn - all messages by user

6/22/2023 11:56:38 PM
Titan poem	The Titan The world was waiting, Watching, Hoping… Could life be salvaged from the Titanic wreck? Recued from the underwater graveyard? In the hidden depths, an eerie echo Haunts the oceans. Deep. Down. Down. Was the banging a cry for help? Did desperate fists pound the inside of that tomb? I imagined them: In that airless chamber; Gulping their last breaths. Time was running out, Oxygen was running out, Hope was running out. And yet, the debris suggests They were already Dead. At the bottom of the ocean. Breathless. Living amongst the relics of the Titanic – Sleeping with souls who had already Sunk To a silent eternity. HJQuinn 22/06/23 edited by hjquinn on 6/23/2023
6/23/2023 12:19:44 AM
I'm new and want advice on my poetry	You obviously love your dog, and that shines through. I like the smiles in the eyes. You could develop the structure. Also, could you develop more descriptions or imagery? Keep going
6/23/2023 12:48:20 PM
The Rougarou	I liked the myth element, and it was sad depression never left... shows myths arent the answer
6/23/2023 12:52:43 PM
Titan poem	The Titan The world was waiting, Watching, Hoping… Could life be salvaged from the Titanic wreck? Recued from the underwater graveyard? In the hidden depths, an eerie echo Haunts the oceans. Deep. Down. Down. Was the banging a cry for help? Did desperate fists pound the inside of that tomb? I imagined them: In that airless chamber; Gulping their last breaths. Time was running out, Oxygen was running out, Hope was running out. And yet, the debris suggests They were already Dead. At the bottom of the ocean. Breathless. Living amongst the relics of the Titanic – Sleeping with souls who had already Sunk To a silent eternity. edited by hjquinn on 6/23/2023
6/23/2023 12:59:57 PM
My poor poem needs a bit of loving from the masses	i like the mass of images and the ideas it makes me think of... if not a bit wierd!
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