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Below are poems written by poet Derek Chos. Click the Next or Previous links below the poem to navigate between poems. Remember, Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth. Thank you.

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Ramblings of a Devil Survivor

I finally made it out of that dead end town, huh?
And yet I go back every weekend to feel safe again
And even so, I'm more trapped than ever there
Lest I risk running into the past again

Two years ago, all I wanted
Was to take her by the hand
Start running north or west
And not stop until I dropped dead or had a family

One year ago, all I wanted
Was to pry my throat from her hands
Start running north
And not stop until I dropped dead or got my degree

Today, all I want
Is to find a reason to live
Learn how to walk again
And not stop until I drop dead or see the end

Next year, who's to say?
So much changes in so little time around these parts
And in the same way
Every little thing stays exactly the same

Let's call '14 a world of my Paladin Soul
And '16 a world of Self-Preservation
Where I'd have died to save everyone back then
And where I'm dying now for trying to save everyone

Then '14 wasn't my only Paladin Soul
'09 through September '15, I never came first in my mind
And when I chose to live for myself last October
I got to watch my skin bubble up from the flame

Two years ago, I nearly died on the operating table
And spent a painful two months learning to live again
Only to find out a few days ago
They messed up, back on the table I go later this month

This time, I'm going it alone
No voices to keep me sane when my legs seize up
No warm caress to help me sleep after 48 hours of haunted eyes
No words on either screen to ensure safety at every moment

It's enough to make me want to scream
To lash out and keep everything at bay
But no matter how hard I fight
It's going to have to happen, no matter how bad it'll hurt

I've survived some particularly nasty devils
I've rewritten enough worlds to be called one myself
But, man oh man, they're gonna keep on coming
Til they can finally force me to cry uncle, aren't they?

Copyright © Derek Chos


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