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Krystal Steele Poem
"Do it, come on, what's the harm?"
I pondered, thinking, this raised alarm.
"You know you want to, it'll make you joyful!"
I sweat, pressured, I'd end up remorseful.
"God didn't mean what He said. Go ahead and do it, you'll be glad."
I clenched my fist fighting, I was getting mad.
He examined his nails and let out a laugh,
"God doesn't know all, He only knows half!"
I swallowed, swaying, shaking in my spot, was it just me or was it getting hot?
He tapped his foot glaring, watching me shake.
"He didn't really mean it-those rules are a fake!"
I furrowed my brow still keeping my stand.
There was something really wrong with this old man.
"Let me ask you something" he said, voice low,
"If God didn't want you to do something, would He not let you know?"
I thought over this, trying to think. I couldn't believe it! My conviction was starting to shrink.
"I cannot do it, God wouldn't be pleased."
"Ha! Why don't you be a man?" A fire lit behind his eyes, and I knew in that moment... I was going to die.
I drew in a breath, igniting passion to my soul.
"I'm sorry Deceiver but I have to go."
"I'm not finished I tell you! There's so much more to do!"
"Well I have nothing more to do with you!"
"Don't think for one moment I won't toy with you, come on now do what you know you'll eventually do!"
I started to once again question myself, oh how relief would spew but there has to be another view...but I give in.
Oh, but it was such a trick! And I am the one he had picked! He sneered and said,
"How do you think it makes God feel, to see His child causing themselves destruction? To think it's the only way to out! Of course you had to doubt!"
I had no response I was down.
How could this have turned around?
Now I'm lying on the ground.
In a gown of grief and shame.
"God, are you happy now? How could you of let this happen? If only you wouldn't have let him. What shall I do now, you wouldn't want me back, I disobeyed you and turned by back, will I ever be forgiven?"
"Child of mine, stand up off the ground. Wipe the dust off the bottom of your feet, for I know that you've been weak. Go, listen to him no more, for he is nothing but poor. I have opened another door freedom at last! Because I love you so much it will forever last."
Copyright © Krystal Steele | Year Posted 2016
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Krystal Steele Poem
If you could see past the beauty you'd see the bruises she refuses to show, nobody can know he's abusive because she thinks if she loses him she'll lose her identity.
If you could see past the sarcasm you'd see someone who is afraid of being honest because they don't want to face the truth, if you only knew what they'd gone through you'd understand why they try so hard to make you laugh.
If you could see past the weight you'd wait to pass your judgment and instead understand that the way you dissect them is only a fraction of the way they degrade themselves, and perhaps they don't need your opinion but an actual friend who adores every inch of their skin.
If you could see past the prescription you'd see a life on a thread, not dead but not alive, because you tried to survive depression without losing feeling, and dealing with the problem isn't easy when your problems outnumbers the waves in the sea.
If you could see past the muscle you'd see a boy who is nothing more than a silhouette because nobody cared who he was until he started playing sports and made homecoming court. So he trains through the pain and fear of losing everything he's ever worked for.
If you could see pass the race you'd see a face that is beautifully unique but erased every trace of their culture from their Facebook because they've been ignorantly misunderstood and are scared of never fitting into this culture of Hollywood.
If you could see past the age you'd see a spirit inside an old soul who is waiting to be asked what their story is, a lifetime of knowledge, laughter, and tears. But years of growth mean nothing if they're not acknowledged.
If you could see past the pregnancy you'd see her praying for protection over a baby that was forged out of force, and of course you can't see that she never wanted to agree to this but she's stuck with the repercussions as he slips away without a single obstruction, and all she is left with is her shame and your judgment.
If you could see past the first glance you took at these people you'd see that each one has a story to finish and to tell, and that they wish that someone would actually care, but instead you stare and you try to figure them out without a doubt that there might actually be more to them than meets the eye.
I can't live like that.
I want to see past the walls, smiles, lies because we all hurt. We need someone who knows the true story and not just the front cover. They should not suffer just because I'm too focused on myself to see who they are because it's not too far from my own war.
I've worn a mask most of my life and filtered every flaw but I finished that act and I don't want your applause. I just want to live, love relentlessly, extensively, unconditionally, that means I choose to see every side of you, and love you even more than I did before, and now your war is mine and you don't have to try and do this alone, because if you could see through the eyes of someone who loves, you'll be slow to judge and quick to listen, and you won't just listen, you'll actually care and that, that's where I want to be!
A place where everyone loves who they see.
Copyright © Krystal Steele | Year Posted 2016
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Krystal Steele Poem
When I say “I know undying love “I mean I'm loved no matter what and nothing will change that.
When I say "I'm saved by grace" I mean I've been given new life I don't deserve, because an innocent man sacrificed himself so I could be set free and forgiven.
When I say "I've been forgiven of my sins" doesn't mean I can do whatever I want and have no guilt, it means I know I've slipped up and I earnestly, honestly seek forgiveness and boldly proclaim it and lay it down for all to see.
When I say "I have overflowing joy" doesn't mean I haven't suffered through hardships, it means I've overcome them because He overcame and a beautiful spirit prevails through it all.
When I say “Hosanna in the highest " it's not another phrase, it's a desperate cry for help with arms stretched wide.
When I say "I am yours" it mean I'm surrendering all that I am, giving it all up, this life is not my own, I live for you, I long to be with you, I'm asking for you to open my eyes to the things unseen, to learn to love like you have, and to break my heart for the things that break yours, everything I am is for your Kingdoms cause.
As I walk into eternity it's like spring time with you making everything new.
When I say my prayers I can feel, hear, and see by the power of the holy spirit, his divine enablement placed in me, because here I am, I'm found on my knees as I'm drawing nearer I'm desperate for Him, to know every part of Him, to stop holding on and let Him hold me in His arms.
He drenched my soul when mercy and grace unravel, I hunger and thirst like His Almighty storm stirring within me, like a rushing crashing wave breathing inside me.
That is what I say.
Copyright © Krystal Steele | Year Posted 2016
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Krystal Steele Poem
We've been through a lot, you and me.
If we just press on, I know we can make it through.
You've seen me crying tears of pure pain and with every page I bleed on, I'll never be the same.
But I wouldn't trade not a moment I've lived.
With every word I pen, a part of my heart, yeah that's what I give.
You let me come and write, because I couldn't speak.
You've taken every ounce of my hate.
You just listen quietly through every sentence that I make.
This is an illness, I am sick to the bone.
My biggest fear is that I'll run out of paper, when my ink well runs dry.
But I don't need a canvas, my stories begin behind the tears that I cry.
I've abused you,
But you never stopped me, you let me rearrange!
I've twisted you into something that I know you aren't.
But you've never rejected me.
You simply take my abuse, knowing beauty comes from ashes.
But do us both a favor, don't let me near those matches!
You are my release, you let me scribble madly.
You never interfere, you listen gladly.
Never do you lash back, when I deserve a hit.
Nah, you're just always there, making sure I don't quit!
Because there's days when I'd rather die,
But you diminish my strife.
I come to you when happy, when horrible sore.
You've seen me giddy, but also laying broken on the floor.
I was just a kid when we first met.
But look at us now, look how far we could get.
We're an inseparable team, you and I.
I've gotten mad and ripped you.
But you never let me give in.
Nah, you let me get it out so depression can't win.
Sometimes I've got no other way, to release all this pain.
I'd this a remedy, or am I going insane?
I'm a sick human, writing all over my walls.
But in rage I take up a brush, and pain over the rhymes.
Even if I don't feel it, anytime I write, you're working.
this is a gift, granted by God.
But I cannot believe that, till he turns this snake into a rod, I’m faithless, nameless, one hundred percent hated.
Even I don't deserve the words I pen.
What's a quill going to do for my brokenness?
It can't mend! I don't hear sense, unless it's said nice n' loud.
All along I was finding respite in all the wrong places, are you starting to see where my mental state is?
So you got to understand, when I come to you I'm bleeding all I have left.
You've always been there, so I don't have to fake.
But are you really helping me or just keeping me awake?
I punch the walls, rage swelling inside. I don't know where to turn, so in you I hide. You're my notebook always there, not just a fad.
Copyright © Krystal Steele | Year Posted 2016
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