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Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik Poem
Broken promises
Makes noose
feels regret
Copyright © Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik | Year Posted 2014
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Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik Poem
They say
Rock
I say
Hard place
I say
Happy
Mind says
Depressed
Mind says
Worthless
Heart says
Worth Everything
Heart says
Find the light
Mind says
What light
Mind says
Keep going
I say
How
I say
I'm a fighter
They say
Round 57
Copyright © Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik | Year Posted 2016
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Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik Poem
All the worlds a stage
and all the men and women mearly players.
They have their entrances
and their exits and one man in his time plays many parts....
I've played my dream role.
I've seen it come to pass.
I've cried at the closing of the show whilst the show of my life continues on.
If I could reprise the role for just a day, I would.
To see,
to taste,
to touch,
to understand and laugh with the text,
to understand every nuance and quirk of the show.
One last time and serve it justice.
To make sure that the show never closed
So if for whatever reason the show did close, no one would ever play it better than I. For now the play continues on.
Maybe, just maybe, one day I'll get to reprise that role.
On that day, if that day happens,
and if that day comes shining it's beautiful face to the dawn of a new tomorrow;
I'll weep golden, shimmering tears of joy.
Copyright © Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik | Year Posted 2014
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Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik Poem
Nineteen weeks
One hundred and thirty three days
three thousand one hundred and ninety two hours
one hundred and ninety one thousand five hundred twenty minutes
eleven million four hundred and ninety one thousand two hundred seconds
It will take me this long to see you again
Off you fly
Back home to Italy
Back home to Pinerolo
Home with your books
Home with your personality
Home with your looks
Home with my heart
I said I was done
Done with love
Done with Romance
Done with getting hurt
Done with these Rosalines
Somehow you made me break my word
All the pounding on my wall
Girls tried to break it down
Like Frankenstein’s mob
But along you came
So much as leaning on my wall
You made it collapse
I never thought I’d get the chance
To see the other side of that wall
Now we have said good bye
That airplane will be boarding
Carrying my heart away to Italy
But this is not the end
This is the mid season break
the one more episode on Netflix
this is A Pair of Blue Eyes
Call me a hopeless romantic
It’s completely true
I’m just an American boy
Falling for an Italian girl
I’ll be waiting
Until that plane lands again in August
Take care of my heart
But enjoy your time
Be free and run wild
If we are meant to be
We will be
Copyright © Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik | Year Posted 2016
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Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik Poem
I’m not mature??Who ever said I was mature?
Twenty years old being told everyday that I’m not perfect
I’m not pigeonholed so leave me out of your doubt that I know who I am
Know that I'm not perfect and I don't need a daily reminder.
You're not funny and I'm not amused.
Let me work on me
It’s been a long road
my whole life I’ve been left out in the cold
mocked and pushed
I’ll strain to be the man I am
but ?I don’t need your reminder
I don’t need your constant belittlement
I’m not a child but I know I’m not yet a true man
I’ll find my way
I’ll be the man I want to become
Your constant deprecation doesn’t bring to light any realization,
prophecy, or new nirvana to my life
be the friends you say you are
Because I don’t need a daily reminder that I’m not at my destination yet
I already know I’m miles from where I started
Copyright © Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik | Year Posted 2016
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Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik Poem
So much to say and no one to say it to
Well that’s not entirely true
You just don’t want me to
You have the strength of Hercules
Yet use it to hurt those close to you
You have the judgement of God
yet use it to push people away
Quick to assume
Slow to reason
like a lightning bolt out of hell
You are unpredictable
and shocking
You are Rocky Balboa
Picking fights with everyone
see who goes
Or see who stays
You are my best friend
and my worst enemy
For now we’ll lay this to rest
I’ll speak with you again
Hopefully soon
Maybe never
You hold a grudge
but do I deserve it
You have the judgement of God
So let’s see how the scales turn
Copyright © Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik | Year Posted 2017
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Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik Poem
No matter what I do
I will never be good enough
I feel I'm going to fail
as an artist
I'm going to **** up my life
I know I am not good enough
to be worth anyones' time
energy
or life
only their sympathy
Copyright © Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik | Year Posted 2014
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Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik Poem
I have to try
I have nothing to contribute
I have nothing to give to this world
I have nothing going for me
I have one more thing I fail at
I have woken up again
Copyright © Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik | Year Posted 2016
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Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik Poem
Gutted. Absolutely gutted.
I know fairytale from truth
I know not all in life has a happily ever after
I know not everything works out
I know all of this
I never knew it could happen to me
I never knew I could be left gutted
I never thought I'd be left standing in the cold rain
What happens when your princess says "I don't love you"
What do I do when I'm so deep in love I can't dig my way out
What happens when you become vulnerable and can't raise a shield
I've held my shield strong
I've held it for four years
Had my heart ripped out once
Had a transplant and said not twice
Lowered my shield
Professed my heart
Had my heart ripped twice
Need a transplant
I need a new heart
One that is harder
One that is colder
One that is sturdier than before
I've let my shield fall twice
The first I was young
The first I was fearless
The first gave me a joyless time
I said never again and raised my shield
Through my broken heart I healed
Through my broken heart I learned strength
Though my broken heart I became Hercules
More like Achilles
I became so confident
I became older
I became wiser
I wouldn't let anyone lower my shield
Until her
She lowered my shield
She made my heart feel full again
She made me smile
She made me laugh
She made me feel loved
She made me feel wanted
She grounded me
She balanced out my flaws
She made me run
She made me jump
She made me giggle
She made me sigh
She made me feel like that young, dumb, eighteen year old again
Alas, she made me cry
She struck me down
She through my shield away
She brought me to my knees begging for mercy
She told me "I don't love you"
Her I sit
Cross from her on this bus
As we ride
plans are plans
My heart is rip'ing
I'm gutted
Standing in the cold rain
Princessless
Shieldless
Melted shattered heart
Gutted
Copyright © Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik | Year Posted 2017
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Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik Poem
In the forest of my mind
The Goblins run amuck
I can not see the path
It all runs together
Stones are moved
Goblins run my mind
Fear of love
Love of fear
Afraid to feel safe
Feel safe when I’m afraid
Goblins take control
My mind is a circus
Of middle Earth??No Gandolf to save me
My order to destroy the menace
Goblins think I’m precious
At least someone cares
Depression will always be there
Like no one else will
Copyright © Xander Nathon Joale Chapclik | Year Posted 2016
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