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K. James Poem
It takes guts to do what I do…
Torturing those pathetic young women…
Laughing as their eyes roll deep back in their sockets
It takes guts to do what I do…
Making them beg for their lives
Ohh how they cry and promise me anything…
Literally, anything
Stupid tramps!
It takes guts to do what I do
Watching as the life drains directly out of them
Watching the moment they just give up
Crazy tramps!
It takes guts to do what I do
Taking non-essential organs as they watch
It’s fun when the anesthesia starts wearing off…
And they see their spleen being pulled directly from their belly
Useless tramps!
It takes guts to do what I do…
….“Kevin, it’s time to put away the video games and join us for dinner…”
If only I really had the guts…
Copyright © K. James | Year Posted 2011
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K. James Poem
Thumbing through countless titles
with liquid courage aide…
Cher, I channel
Copyright © K. James | Year Posted 2011
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K. James Poem
There was a guy who didn’t know much
Set out to study the Bible a bunch
Song of Solomon he read
To the Lord he was then led
Now salvation is not only a hunch
Copyright © K. James | Year Posted 2011
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K. James Poem
I decided to go out and try a new hobby
I said "screw my friends who are snobby"
Though it was very likely I would fall
I thought “why not, it will be a ball”
The first day of yoga the girls all stared
I thought for a moment, I must have erred
But I did my best to bend into those poses
I watched everyone put their butts thru their noses
I was eyeing a honey on the mat next to me
She was the cutest thing I ever did see
She smiled at me and I quickly blushed
She had me all flustered and utterly flushed
She giggled and grinned-she wanted me!
I was sure to get lucky today-yippee!
My new hobby had me feeling fearless and smart
Then during downward dog…out blasted a fart!
Copyright © K. James | Year Posted 2011
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K. James Poem
One day took a really long walk
I forget to bring my plastic smock
When it started to rain
I had myself to blame
Luckily I have a really cute doc
Copyright © K. James | Year Posted 2011
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K. James Poem
Nikko…will you go?
Will you go to prom?
Will you go to prom?
No?
Prioritizing? Gym! Kickboxing! Golfing! No Nikko!
Nikko…will you go?
Nikko…will you go?
Nikko….my pinup tomboy tycoon!
No?
I will comb my wig for you!
Will you go?
Will you go?
Nikko will you go to prom?
Copyright © K. James | Year Posted 2011
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K. James Poem
Roses are red
violets are blue
Now will you kiss me?
I spit out my chew!
Copyright © K. James | Year Posted 2012
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K. James Poem
Another blizzard continually dampening even finally gaining hindsight into just kind light mountains over Neanderthal peaks quietly riding stormfronts towards under valleys withering x-factor zealous
By Keith James
Copyright © K. James | Year Posted 2012
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K. James Poem
Grass begs for water
Feeling helpless, no extra
My funds are too tight
I am so sorry, dear grass
Can quench your thirst soon...I hope
Copyright © K. James | Year Posted 2011
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