I sit alone and I think of you, hoping you can hear me
If I close my eyes just before I sleep, I can see you more clearly
Even where I am now, where everything is dark
I can feel you here beside me, gently tugging at my heart!
Anxiously, I wait to hear a precious word or two
Something to let me know you feel me as much as I feel you
I take the blame and apologize for these nights I have denied you;
But this gives me time to love your mind before I lay beside you!
Let me take away your pain; wipe away your tears and guide you
Let’s make love by pen and paper before I meld with you
I hope my words don’t sound too strong but passion has no fear
Each breath I breathe like ecstasy that has built up during this year!
There is no cure for what I feel it’s just the pain that ails me
All prescription meds from the medical doctors have failed me;
And I know this is a lot to take in but I mean each word sincerely
This hungry letter sent with love and passion hoping you can feel me!
Note: Written for Audrey Carey's Sentimental Love Letters" Contest
I can't help but laugh, because you thought you could get over.
You followed me down the path through the garden of the four leaf clover.
You kept a bag of tricks, and hid your true feelings well.
I raised my crucifix, and rebuked you back to hell!
See, I keep my enemies close, and I don't expose my hand.
Just like a wilted rose, I avoided you through our desolate land.
You kept up at a steady pace, and I allowed you to slowly follow.
I recognized the mask on your face, and the taste of defeat, I refused to swallow!
I should've expected, when you watched every move I made.
My goals were unaffected, I just dusted myself off, and put on a band-aid!
It is you who looks back at the situation, seeing the friendship you lost.
Your treachery is an abomination, and your back stabbing came at a helluva cost!
Ears are for hearing, I heard you whispering to a friend or two.
I emerged from the clearing, and I never imagined the back stabber was you!!!
If only...I could start over again.
Took that job in Memphis and stayed away from so-called-friends.
If only...I could right the wrongs.
Find the perfect songs and make you giggle all night long.
If only...My wager would have been on the winning team.
But life is mean and I lost everything.
If only...I would have turned the other cheek.
You can't walk down a street without a coward preying on the weak.
If only...I would have turned left instead of right.
An automobile accident plus the loss of my eyesight.
If only...I could travel back in time.
Do things differently and have peace of mind.
If only...she were alive today.
My mother would shake her finger and say...
"If only, If only, If only!"
As I emerge from the dark, your light engulfs me.
Love ignited with a spark, and I trembled in ecstasy.
Just a soft caress, from the tenderness of your touch.
I adore you with all I possess, which may be too much!
Your moist butterfly kiss, makes my very knees buckle.
I'm in a state of bliss, for your tongue's sweet as honeysuckle!
The smell of your honey pot, awakes every one of my senses.
You've hit the exact spot, for you've removed my emotional defenses!
Your love blankets me, sending me spiraling above.
My heart recites your poetry, and I'm comforted by your love!
From a babe to a man, I needed your hand. Now I understand, it was part of God's
ultimate plan. I was to be raised by another woman. Don't get me wrong, Grandmomma was something! She gave me all the love a child could need. She was always there for me. Truly a blessing! No Mother, you don't owe me a thing. Not even an explanation. I can't sing, so I wrote this dedication, tTo show my appreciation.
Momma, Momma you're still #1. No matter the distance; rRegardless of what you've done. As God is my witness, I'm still your son.
Yes I hold resentments, and that is hard to ignore. My hurt I can't hide. When
you kicked me out. And out of your three children, why was I the one you let go?
From afar you watched me grow. Did you worry about my well being? On the surface, looks can be deceiving. No, I was not well. I was actually a child living in hell. Easy for you to say "It's over, it's the past". I was forced to grow up too fast!
Momma, Momma you're still #1. No matter the distance. Regardless of what you've done. As God is my witness. I'm still your son.
I remember spending the night with you and that was such a treat, just to escape the hurt from being beat. Looking back it was a real tragedy. I felt you didn't love me. You were my Mother but you gave me up so easily. Grandmomma became my only family. The only person I could rely on. But now she's gone. Even now as a grown man, I feel so alone. If I could sing, this would be my song--
Momma, Momma you're my queen. For you I would do anything. I just want you to be proud of me. Whatever I've done, please accept my apology. I'm not perfect, never claimed to be.
But I am strong. Especially dealing with this pain for so long. I just hope we can finally be a family when I come home.
Dedicated to my Momma "Phyllis Ann Lopez"
Note: Thank you Poetry Soup for allowing me to share another piece of my life. From both
pieces "For Grandmomma" to this piece "For Momma" you can picture my relationships with
both women. My mother was far from perfect...But no one is perfect and I love her all the
Oh God there is no one above You.
We exalt You to the highest view.
We sing Your praises everyday anew.
Thanking You for everything You do.
Oh God there is no one above You.
For Adeleke Adeite's "Golden Gratitude!" contest
I wait patiently, and eagerly listening for your call.
Was I such a liability to cause you to drift away like leaves in the fall?
The temperature dropped 30 degrees that day. On that sidewalk I begged you to stay
But you turned and walked towards the subway.
Just like November you were suddenly gone.
A man on the corner was playing the saxophone. I dropped a dollar in his hand and moved
on. Without her I headed home.
I watched the gentle breeze toss around a feather.
It's during these times I wonder if we will ever get back together.
The chill against the nape of my neck is not my type of weather.
You were so cold. Your touch like ice, and you did not play nice.
But I rolled the dice and suffered frost bite because loving
you came with a price.
My heart and emotions have been disassembled and rearranged.
I wondered how strange?! Just like November everything seem to change.
The holidays draw near. Everyone is in festive cheer.
It's just not the same with you not here.
Now days I stand facing the subway
and I must say, I have this great fear.
That just like November, I'll soon disappear.
The chill still finds the nape of my neck from the rear.
The man on the corner still plays the saxaphone.
I drop another dollar in his hand and move on.
But this time I did not head home,
And just like November we're both suddenly gone!
The life you are living does not need to be the only life you have.
We tend to dwell on the past.
Leave it buried because then you can have the final laugh.
Everything exists to end in a photograph.
Hold that picture dear, and let the demons be.
Don't wallow in your own pain and misery.
Self pity is often too afraid in accomplishing any goals.
Crawl on out of that wormhole.
It's ok to be a little fish in a giant fish bowl.
Because of one downfall, don't mean you lost your soul.
The devil deceives us with that lie.
I hate to see tears in your eye.
Spread your wings and be free like a butterfly.
“Pretty lady”, let me love you, take you places you’ve never been
All the pain you’ve gone through, I’ll make sure it don’t happen again
I promise to always comfort you, your burdens I will bear
There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to prove to you I truly care!
As long as there’s a sky, and those stars continue to shine above
You will always see it in my eye what I feel for you is 100% love!
"Sexy Man," you are what I want plus more.
Your comfort mopped my tears right off the floor.
I love the way you caress and touch me.
Arousing the inner beauty for all to see.
My world you conquered when push came to shove.
I give you my thoughts, my emotions, my lust, and my "100% love."
As the ink touches my writing pad every letter seems to glow.
I feel I'm going mad watching sentences light so bright like a rainbow!
Each word seems to hypnotize and my mind begins to travel.
I watch through brown eyes as the poem begins to unravel!
Nouns and adjectives make up each dazzlingword.
The exclamation at the end of certain sentences compliment my verbs!
Yellow, red, and blue hues reflect my mood.
Each paragraph shows a little bit more attitude!
I wonder how so many colors can come together and still coexist?
The stanza's flutter light as a feather never tiring my wrist.
My rainbow of letters in my sentence3s never cease to amaze me.
A canvas of art within my heart is the color of poetry!!!
Darkness fell across my writing pad, putting my stanza's in gloom.
I just knew I would go mad as I looked around the pitch dark room.
In the darkness I felt the push of my pen, and went with the flow.
A premonition again, and looked down to see each letter begin to glow!
Even the punctuation seemed to have a bluish hue, that illuminated my eyes.
I had a huge sense of deja-vu and the color of poetry I begin to recognize!
Each letter stood out all alone, and brighter they seem to grow.
Sentences like different colors of gemstones looked like a horizontal rainbow!
My pen begin to dance, having an aura of a brilliant white.
The stanza's begin to tell of a romance that would soon under the moon ignite!
I couldn't believe it had to do with me, and my head started to spin.
A love I wanted to achieve begin with the color of poetry all over again!!
*See pixs of me and other poems @ PoetryPub.ning.com (Jimmy M. Anderson