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Elisa Escalante Poem
Silence and violence,
but never any solace.
Blaming and shaming.
Never any taming.
This side or that side?
Never any combined...
forces for the good,
no one is understood.
A senseless cycle,
an endless spiral.
Sad thing of tragedy,
is it's predictability.
From the first crisis,
to the endless...
reinforced programs,
coddling the madman.
We care, then we don't.
We pray, then we hope.
Woke and then helpless.
Tired and then restless.
Brave, and then not.
Action! Then, we stop.
Copyright © Elisa Escalante | Year Posted 2022
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Elisa Escalante Poem
They didn't say it would be this way.
They promised happy sober days.
But the world I lived in,
was not lined with plated gold.
I had to consume to fill a void,
no self love means self destroyed,
and the world I lived in...
grew fast as I grew too old.
When all I felt was violence,
almost died, then finally chose silence.
The peace feels like a sin...
I just might give in and fold.
Addicted to lows and highs,
with my life masked in disguise...
need so damn badly to win,
and kill this demon that I called home.
Copyright © Elisa Escalante | Year Posted 2022
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Elisa Escalante Poem
I don't believe in Freedom.
Because even when I am free,
I don't have the freedom to show,
that other side of me.
I don't want to feel freedom.
Because if I feel that alive,
when it get's taken away from me,
it will leave a hold inside.
And what is freedom anyways?
If we can do what we want?
Because it's only when they catch us,
when it is free that we are not.
They say that we have freedom,
and if that thought may be...
why don't I feel I've got the right,
to say that I am Free?
Copyright © Elisa Escalante | Year Posted 2022
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Elisa Escalante Poem
You were there, in both reality and dream.
Bringing the facts right back to me.
My mind twisting through death and life,
the present, getting harder to come by.
Screamed in the rain down on my knees,
while the flood came pouring out of me.
I had you there, but I was still alone.
Struggle must always come back home.
Bending the shapes, up in the heat.
I wondered if they had ever loved me?
Had I been there? Had I done that?
Where was my mind? Would it come back?
I was born again, at lightning speed,
as reality was granted back to me.
You were there; the killer, and the crutch.
I'm done now, I think I've had too much.
Copyright © Elisa Escalante | Year Posted 2022
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Elisa Escalante Poem
All I can think of, is the million different ways...
that you will try to screw me over.
And I can't change my mind.
I've got the worst kind.
Sabotaging,
Anticipating,
Spiraling,
Catastrophizing.
I don't think Love is for me.
It always comes with pain.
Even when good and healthy,
my mind still thinks this way.
Ruminating.
Contemplating...
in disbelief.
But, still believing.
Warned you once, and then twice. Then again
and again and again.
Wasn't kidding, at all when I said...
my mind'll spin and spin and spin.
Be everything I need, and all that I want...
and what I never had before.
I know it's crazy. I'm unrealistic. Void's been
burning me deep to my core.
Do you deserve better? Do I deserve more?
Do I need hate?
Can you still adore?
All I can do is put trust in something,
even when my heart is torn.
Believe that this love is worth all things;
the terror, the pain...
the crazy... the dizzy...
the anxiety.... the agony...
the want... then the hate...
my heart is just too damn sore.
Copyright © Elisa Escalante | Year Posted 2023
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Elisa Escalante Poem
The highs, the greatest of highs.
The lows, the darkest of lows.
Feeling rainbows and butterflies.
The pain of fear, and lost control.
You love me? I know, I think so...
I'm not worthy? I guess not...
they love us, it's all for show...
you hurt me, but won't get caught.
You're screaming, but I'm to blame?
Throwing things, but my fault?
It all feels... too insane...
I yell back, and then I'm wrong?
Losing track of how it began.
No sense in all these choices,
I should have kiss and ran,
trapped in... promising voices.
Chewed me up, spit me out,
this rage, too indescribable.
Why did I not trust the doubts?
This end... was so damn probable.
Copyright © Elisa Escalante | Year Posted 2022
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