Your Baby Is Really Ugly

Your Baby Is Really Ugly By Elton Camp At no time and in no way Will anyone these words say For electing to tell the truth In such a case is too uncouth Wise folks play the praise game Even when the words sound lame Tell the parents what they’d hear Or never again, to them, come near The baby’s head come to a point And its nose looks out of joint Plus, it is terribly cross-eyed And couldn’t smile if it tried There’s nothing that it can do Except from its orifices spew Spindly leg and undeveloped arm Blue skin should sound an alarm But if the truth you ever dare to tell Expect to hear, “You can go to hell.” If words you are compelled to utter, “Oh, how cute,” you’d better mutter