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Young looking lady in the tunnel

mon carlo tamine Avatar    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Young looking lady in the tunnel which was written by poet mon carlo tamine. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Young looking lady in the tunnel

As I passed on
The sign on
The chair that says:
Martin place

A young looking lady
With brown hair
And blue dress
Smile at me.

I myself smile at her
As a response
And I think its a very reational response
Instantly about 5 seconds
Our eyes f*c*k.

She didn't say word
I got some of it
In my head 
Unspoken though

Then the tunnel exhales
Wind sweeping
On her perfume
Only small amount
I could smell

The train blows its breath
And its approaching like a bull
Then it stops in front of her

She expand her chest
And I can hear my eyes screaming
For her to stay there
And continue this sensual
Eye romance
Just for one minute 

Strangely I think
She heard my inner scream
She stop and give a smile
But her feet takes her
towards the train

The door close
As she disappear
I Try to look for any resemblance of her
I think it was also blown by the train
Even her scent was gone.

Now Im alone 
i felt like smoking
I grab my left pocket
And I still have a half of it
The cigarette

I lit a stick 
Rode the escalator
I feel like walking on
the crowded street of George street.

Maybe I will one day
see her agin 
hundred days from now
young looking lady
With blue dress who smile at me.

-comments please mate- TY

Copyright © mon carlo tamine

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  1. Date: 6/19/2013 1:49:00 PM
    Mon, thank you for sharing this story about a lady, down your path. Dropping in with a nice warm WELCOME to poetry soup. I’m here to invite you on over to my latest contest. You will find the contest page on the top left hand side* please consider my contest* hopefully you find this place to be the comfort zone your pen is looking for. If you ever need or seek feedback on a certain poem, click on my name any time you like. I’m looking forward in following you and your poetry. Hope to hear from you soon. You will enjoy this community; we are one big happy family. (Drama & Love. LOL) ~ Take Care!! From: your new poet friend Linda

  1. Date: 6/19/2013 8:01:00 AM
    Hi Mon Carlo, hopefully you get to see her again one day. great imagery, Stopping by with a nice and sweet Welcome to Poetry Soup. Wishing you the best when it comes to your poems. I hope you get to meet all the nice poets around here. Starting with me. SKAT :-) Please drop a hello and tell me a little about yourself if you like. I would like to be your newest poetry soup fan....... God Bless........... Hugs* SKAT

  1. Date: 6/19/2013 5:11:00 AM
    Hey, Carlo! - Pleased to read your first poem in the P-Soup! - You write very well. - Welcome to P-Soup, hope you will get much pleasure from sharing your thoughts and words here with us :) - Here it is: give to get, comments - then you will get feedback on your writing - I love get feedback on what I write. - Wish you luck my "new friend" - Have fun with poetry! - oxox / / Anne-Lise :)