Yestersyears Afterpaths

How do I write what I am thinking? How do I put on paper these feelings I have within? They all seem to be racing Racing in my mind For some recognition For some sort of understanding. For once they all had meaning They all stood for something They played a part in my life. But now thinking back Those Yestersyears All seem to be gathering as one. For nothing of then Has any meaning of now. So why must I remember them? Why must they carry A place in my heart? Why must the mistery Of them weight heavy Sometimes in my brain? But my thoughts go there So many times unwilling. They go there without My permission. So when I am forced To recall those Yestersyears I have to keep myself busy I have to make myself Remain strong. For I cannot change them I cannot make them disappear. They will always harbor my body They will always dwell within my mind. Is this what life is suppose to be? A long journey of uncertainties? A life time of afterpathes? I may never know of the true meaning Of all the Yestersyears Of my life. Nor may I witness the impact Of my life as of now. All I can hope for is an understanding Of today And to pray for a brighter toworrow As this day slowly fades away.