Why Am I Alive

I've been in the worst hellholes on earth in my youth, full of arrogance and hate due to the perceived injustices all around me. Attacking alone without backup, sure to fail. No secrets of God available to guide me there. Promises made to the Son, just to cover my ass and escape the danger soon forgotten when safe again. What has changed since then? Only the person I love the most was saved. So I learned to love again, setting my unfeeling heart free to do it's thing, trust His voice thru the Spirit whispering gently through my intuition.Just suggestions,never orders,my choice to heed the secrets or act alone again.When you hear the father and you listen to the son's secret's thru the children's voices,you will feel that your little ones are one with you, that they are the very essence of your life, and you will bond so close to them that you seem to feel every movement that they make, reason to be alive?