Why?

Why does life have to be so complicated? Why is it that everything I ever wanted and dreamt of as little girls is the complete opposite? Are my expectations to high? Am I too hard on myself? Why do I doubt my ability of being good mother? Did I fail as wife or did he fail me as a husband? It’s hard when someone means so much to you but you don’t mean the same to them. Insecurity has brought a dark shadow over me, I feel as if I am not worthy of being me, I am no longer beautiful, but have I ever been? The doubts that cloud my mind bring upon an unexplained sense of insecurity that make me doubt myself in so many ways. I used to be strong and full of joy and laughter. Am I going through a change of life or is my life being changed by someone who does not share the same dreams as I do? Do I keep fooling myself that one day I will be that person’s priority? But how can I be a priority to someone else if I’ve lost myself in the darkness of complete distrust. Why?