Where Are You Now

He got a speeding ticket on a lonely road in Montana. It was 3AM. He was alone. All the “support” groups were declared “non-essential” by the AI super computer and sent home to “shelter in Place”. A Satellite reported “thermal” imagery of movement around a fire in the woods of Washington state. A “self-driving” EV drove off a cliff. The “accident” was deemed an “algorithmic anomaly” caused by an “unknown stressor”. A body lay motionless in a city park. A police officer called for an ambulance as he administered “Narcan”. A group of “onlookers” videoed his every move. It was immediately posted everywhere. My “cell phone” is a “RAT”. It is in constant contact with its handlers, reporting my every move. If I leave it home “other” handlers search for me. When found I am admonished and told how “important” it is that I always “take my phone with me”. My GPS hates me! I turn it on and then don’t follow its directions. I facetiously tell people it is just another “woman’s” voice I don’t listen to. I am a “GUY”. I used to be a “MAN” but by definition “they no longer exist anymore”. I like to “figure stuff out”. Y’know, like, before GOOGLE. Y’know, like, sit down and think about it, make a diagram on the box, “improvise”, get it done. The TV tries to tell me what I would like to watch. My computer tries to tell me what I would like to purchase based on a profile they claim they don’t have. My mother stopped feeding me baby peas when I spit them out the second time. Why doesn’t the computer have that “profile” stored in its “algorithm” of asinine profiles? Anyway, I’m off to the Tattoo Parlor to have a “third eye” tattoo placed on my forehead just to screw with the “facial recognition” feature of my allegedly benign “cell” phone. Don’t forget your “phone” and “keep both hands on that freakin’ steering wheel” . Hugs and Kisses They Know Who