What's Fair Is Fair

What’s fair is fair I walked into Macys Department Store the other day thinking I’d buy a few items for the summer I entered on the first floor and was met by counter after counter of cosmetics and perfume with finely made up women in fancy smocks just waiting to apply the latest from Estee Lauder or spritz the newest fragrance from Lacome. Then I wandered through the labyrinth of ladies shoes, Every style, color, material, pattern, shape and design known to man, well maybe not man Low heels, high heels, stilettos, pumps, sandals, boots running shoes, dress shoes, casual shoes and don’t get me started on the purses, Coach, Michael Kors, Dooney and Burke…clutches, handbags, wallets, totes, big bags and even bigger bags I took the escalator up hoping to find something to my liking I walked from one end to the other, nothing but women’s clothing Calvin Klein, Ralph Lauren, J.Jill, Hilfiger, you name it, they had it. Tops, skirts, dresses, work attire, dinner attire, after eight attire There were weekend outfits and morning, noon and evening wear Low cut, high cut, hip huggers, sleeveless, three quarter sleeves, short sleeves, long sleeves, ruffles, leggings, shorts, t-shirts, gowns denim, leather, cotton, polyester, nylon, fringed, hinged…I cringed Another flight up, my fingers crossed…OMG, ladies lingerie. I had no idea there were that many bras in the world, it seems like the entire alphabet is used for the sizes and sometimes it is used twice, A.B.C.D.E.AA,BB,CC…and so on… There was also rack after rack of panties, Spanx, body suits, nylons. pantyhose, knee high, thigh high, lifting, supporting, separating, holding in, back support, front support, butt enhancing…butt enhancing? Negligees, robes, pajamas, and bathing suits, millions of bathing suits One more flight up and needless to say I was becoming quite aggravated I scanned the floor then finally asked an employee where the Men’s department was? He said, “It’s way over there in that corner, just past the toaster ovens, luggage, dinnerware and bedding, tucked in behind the Children’s s department.” Then I asked him one more question because at this point I was very curious “Where are all of the female customers today?” He answered, “Oh, they are all downtown protesting how the world is so unfair to them.” Note: Macys is a department store in the states. Similar to The Bay in Canada or Fenwick in the UK 5/15/17 Written for the Foreskinfedora For Poets Who Identify As Men Poetry Contest Sponsored by John Lawless