What Is

I switched my head to off. But my mind wonders. She wants to stay on. I cannot argue. She is in control. I am caged by her viscous hate. I am bound to her lustful desires. I am him. I am she. I am him to be a she. I cannot sleep. She is awake. I am high inside the lowest shadow. I am high outside the deepest shallow. I swim when I am unable to walk. They are many sharks. None with one fin. Watching me. Starring freely. They want my flesh. Unfortunately, I am poisoned. My curse is scarred deep into my soul. I smack my veins everyday. Violet rakes my arms. In between the needless and the dotted lines. Pain inflicted by my help of self. I am healing. Only if I am let be. Only then I am free. Is am burning ash to the fire. What is. Was never suppose to be me.