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Way Back When

My heart is heavy with remembered pain unhealed... Messages of the past beg to be reread memories beg to be relived and though it brings pain The pain is bitter sweet I go through past poems trying to capture forgotten times experiences shared friendships made teasing words terms of endearment written no longer true now a different hue all the same steel grey my rainbow’s gone away I read little messages a sad smile tugs at my lips I wonder, What happened? What changed? Did I? Repeated themes repeated lines echoes of the past haunting me still... My heart begs, “Be Still. Leave the past behind. Find your peace of mind. Let go. Let go and live." I quiet my heart’s voice and let the tears spill looking for those faces that live with me still if only in my mind I need to live again the magic... the pure magic Of way back when Eileen Manassian

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Richard Lamoureux

Date: 11/9/2016 9:18:00 AM

Sometimes looking back can be good. Still there is magic to look forward to as well.

Kabuteng P.Ink K.

Date: 10/7/2014 11:24:00 AM

Sighs....hmmm. I can definitely relate to this, and I just have this bittersweet smile on me right now-- you put my thoughts in words here, Eileen. The question that you pose here-- I have also asked myself. & in all honesty, I think I have changed, for better or worse? Hmm, I am not sure. You captured so much here in this sighing beauty. That's how I'd describe this. I hope you're doing good-- my dad's still not feeling well, so is my mom. I just wanted to drop by a quick hi and hug.

Richard Lamoureux

Date: 10/6/2014 2:06:00 PM

I meant I have no plans to leave. This site is doing weird things.

Eileen Manassian
Date: 10/6/2014 2:16:00 PM

:) Thanks for explaining....Anything new for us tonight? Night....my time! Correcting outlines! ;(

Richard Lamoureux

Date: 10/6/2014 2:05:00 PM

Robert Lindley

Date: 10/5/2014 11:02:00 PM

Past, present and future, could theoretically be all happening at the same time. Is time just a man made concept? A way to cope because our limited minds can not truly fathom eternity? Great and deep write my friend. Enjoyed the read much!

Eileen Manassian
Date: 10/6/2014 12:45:00 PM

Thanks ever so much, Robert. Ahhhh...time. I have that in limited supply. I'm always aware that the days are passing....My daughter just turned twenty today. It's so hard for me to imagine....So hard to accept the fact that I'm no longer in my twenties. Oh dear....I happen to be very nostalgic. I'm Melancholy Sanguine....What a temperament! Ah...I've waxed eloquent. Thanks for your lovely visit, Robert. Will be by to see you soon.

Liam Mcdaid

Date: 10/5/2014 10:53:00 PM

this is so deep very beautifully painted piece eileen i tip my hat

Eileen Manassian
Date: 10/6/2014 12:42:00 PM

Thank you, Liam. I'm glad that you found something beautiful in this piece to comment on.

Harry Horsman

Date: 10/5/2014 4:16:00 PM

powerful oh so powerful,,i can so easily relate to this Eileen,,although touching on this subject before,,again i say,,,it is the nostalgic past that as created your today' s strengths and abilities to enchants us all with your poetry . this is so good so human, so truthfully honest.

Eileen Manassian
Date: 10/6/2014 12:41:00 PM

Thanks, Harry. Honesty is so precious and dear to me. I've known the loss of it....Thank you so much for this lovely write. You are one of the friends of my past whom I always love to hear from. :) You bring joy with every post. Thank you for being so kind to me. Hugs

Justin Bordner

Date: 10/5/2014 2:32:00 AM

The foundation of future magic rises on the mystery of love unforgotten...we make love when we need love, we sing anew when we remember the songs that passion grew. There is always a rainbow waiting to be chased by eyes of hungry hue. This poem of salty shine has a humble honesty that induces optimism. You know how to show all the colors of your heart Eileen...J.A.B.

Eileen Manassian
Date: 10/6/2014 12:39:00 PM

Justin....I love how you use words to express yourself. You write....so differently than I do, and that is why I find your writes so captivating. You see all the colors of my heart, Justin, because you have a rainbow colored heart. Intricate and detailed....and beautiful. :)

Richard Lamoureux

Date: 10/4/2014 7:53:00 PM

Brighter days ahead my dear. Sometimes the ebb and flow of waves feels like a retreat when in fact a larger wave of goodness is picking up steam. Do not be disheartened, you are much loved and appreciated.

Eileen Manassian
Date: 10/6/2014 12:33:00 PM

I hope so, Richard. Truth of the matter is....it won't be the same without those dear to me...and that's the truth. Yes, there are new friends, but the old friends are still a big part of my heart....I miss the other Richard. You know? The one who would tease me no end? I miss being Desert Orchid. :( That's the truth. I miss Richard most of all....I'm glad you are still here. It worries me when I think you might leave. You bring me joy...stick around, ya hear?

Tim Smith

Date: 10/4/2014 4:32:00 PM

I hear you loud and clear Eileen...I have similar feelings when I go back to where I lived with my kids. It still feels like home but I don't live there and miss that feeling....I love your pen and your heart my dearest Eileen...hugs Tim

Arthur Vaso
Date: 10/4/2014 5:37:00 PM

My friends often tell me to move on, however they never once said to me "move in"

Eileen Manassian
Date: 10/4/2014 4:57:00 PM

Tim, I feel with you and for you. It's so hard to move on.....Thank you for being such an encouragement to me today. You've always been kind and sweet. I'm privileged to know you.

Jan Allison
Date: 10/4/2014 4:47:00 PM

It must be difficult for you Tim, but you have moved on and you still have memories of happier times:-) hugs Jan xx

Arthur Vaso

Date: 10/4/2014 3:29:00 PM

Wow wow wow wow, you have outdone yourself yet again Eileen, I begin to think you have a bit of Rumi's soul in you!!! Hugs :)

Tim Smith
Date: 10/4/2014 5:43:00 PM

lol....you can move in with me on one condition...you have to cheer for the Blackhawks :)

Eileen Manassian
Date: 10/4/2014 5:04:00 PM

What a complete!!! A bit of Rumi in me...wouldn't that be something, Arthur. You are a dear. Hugs!!!

Charmaine Chircop

Date: 10/4/2014 3:23:00 PM

Sorry my reply button isnt easy to use with.phone.I will send some mail and soup mails tomorrow and see

Charmaine Chircop

Date: 10/4/2014 3:22:00 PM

Is Drake still doinf the show?I remember when I called to read my poetry and talked to him,you,another time to Richard,Nette,JimboScribe,Nikko , and other soupers.Then He asked me to be his guest,but I.refused cause Im a bit on the shy side,but aw it was fun getting online together.I used to go back on blogtalk radio and listen to.past episodes.He disappeared from here too.There are others I really miss too :.(.How about trying to recontact them ?Becca and others etc

Charmaine Chircop
Date: 10/5/2014 9:49:00 AM

You know i cant find becca s email either.Im surei had itcause we shared emails.Could it be she removed the email account?

Eileen Manassian
Date: 10/4/2014 5:09:00 PM

I'm in touch with Drake on Skype. No...he hasn't done one since the last time which was Raymond N. Yes, I listen to the older programs as well. I'm sad that you didn't accept to cohost with him, sweetie. You'd rock the place. I can't get to Becca....I thought I had her email address, but I can't seem to find it. I'd love to leave her a message. I wonder how she is.

Charmaine Chircop

Date: 10/4/2014 3:03:00 PM

Eileen this poem misty eyes.It reminds me of friends who were closest than family,but now are gone or hardly here.This poem took me there to those times of fun,of poetry shared.Yes lady people change,I change,and who knows tomorrow where I'll be..Heartwrenching.Come here,let me give you a big hug .

Charmaine Chircop
Date: 10/4/2014 5:35:00 PM

I will get to.her tomorrow and tell her you wish yo het in touch if you wsnt dearNo..I am shy ,a bit shy even when I call,even though Drake makes me feel at ease.Two hrs would be too long for me :.)..But i really like his show..If you talk to him pls tell him.to get back.to write : )

Eileen Manassian
Date: 10/4/2014 5:07:00 PM

I know....it's hard to lose friends. I'm glad you are still here, my sweet. I appreciated the nice warm hug. Don't worry too much about me....I go through these ups and downs....as is normal for me. Tomorrow is a new day....Hugs

Charmaine Chircop
Date: 10/4/2014 3:07:00 PM

Misted

Jan Allison

Date: 10/4/2014 2:46:00 PM

I can relate to this poem so much Eileen I look back on comments from people no longer here and it makes me so sad ... I can't bear to log onto Jadazzle I miss Darren so so so much. Big hugs to us both Jan xxxxx

Jan Allison
Date: 10/4/2014 5:24:00 PM

I think we have all become experts at giving advice but not heeding it ourselves Eileen :-) God willing he I will hear some news soon hugs jan xxx

Eileen Manassian
Date: 10/4/2014 5:01:00 PM

Oh...you know my pain then. I've lost some wonderful people here. People who would read my work and comment and make me smile...I'm getting misty eyed. I don't know why I can't let go.... :( Jan, hope he gets better soon, dear and can come back and you two can dazzle again! :) Keep positive....I can at least say that to others when I can't think that way myself. Hugs

Charmaine Chircop
Date: 10/4/2014 4:39:00 PM

I pray for him dear

Jan Allison
Date: 10/4/2014 3:19:00 PM

I have no idea how he is - I am only in contact via the family and heard nothing now since 10th September and I get more and more concerned for his well being as time passes:-( I hope and pray he is continuing to recover and will be back in our lives once more when he is fully better hugs Jan xxxx

Charmaine Chircop
Date: 10/4/2014 3:06:00 PM

How is He dear? I miss him too though I was just beginning to know him.I miss many soupers and some more than the others. :.(

Brenda Meier-Hans

Date: 10/4/2014 2:14:00 PM

So sad Eileen. I want to give you a hug. You poured out your heart making a beautiful poem. OO

Eileen Manassian
Date: 10/4/2014 2:16:00 PM

Nostalgia is hitting me hard, Brenda. Night time isn't a good time to write....I'm usually down in the evenings...oh well...My heart is heavy and I had to vent. Thanks for listening. ;) I need a hug.