Voices

Voices in my head are spinning All my actions considered sinning Wishing at times I could start back at the begging Looking to the future; See no way of winning Trying to listen to what they say Useing only instict to make my way No one to listen; Yet plenty to say Searching deep down The good times and bad Tellin myself Life isn't that bad Knowing all my choices could not have been wrong Others around me Still I feel so alone Looking back at my life Wondering where it has gone 29 years, not seeming that long Searching and searching For the source of my pain Knowing for sure I am not quiet sane Why I am here is not yet plain Knowing there has to be something to gain Scaring myself with the things that I "know" Living in this body with such an old soul Dealing with this " sickness" is taking it's toll Waiting for my turn feel I've lost my roll Standing on the sideline as this life passes me by Fearing the day when it is my turn to die