Trans In Reverse

Trans In Reverse By Lola Im ill today cause the sky is gray A strange sort of comfort in the mood of the day I hide in the darkness between rays of sunlight I dont have a fever, but i feel sick every night I cant leave the bed, because the feedback’s too loud The noise holds me down and welcomes in the crowd I breathe in the fumes of a dying man outside Killing myself slowly when I’m out of space to hide I don’t look like the other girls I know and always see There doesn’t seem to be a place for me inside those dreams And when I show my trans face to unconditional love I end up in the cold cause family will never be enough My mind unravels slowly; the sun will never rise I lose myself in her and drown my best disguise Drifting through the void of me in wake of everything I see The sideways stares; the fear they show....it’s really ME I’ll never be A menace of the fringe; eyes alive with despair and rage Tattoo my hands and face to scare the masses from a cage My bones and skin begin to change; I die a little every day Baby trans in Purgatory to tell the truth that I am gay I see a woman that smiles at me with a defiant Cheshire slope I have the power that I seek to make the world alive with hope My breasts, my lips, the way my hips begin to swing Surreal as life are diamond rings; the weight is held in little things