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Tomb

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March.11.2024
Threadbare, Tearful, Tattered, Tomb Words Poetry Contest
Sponsor- Constance La France
~ Placed First~

 

“I feel my life so empty. It is preferable to fill a tomb to being doomed to live out a life that is empty” ~ By Poet.
Darkness encompasses my space. My future is seen so bleak where feral beasts hide. Not even a glow worm to throw light. I see no chance of deliverance. Through the mazy depths of gloom, I wade, Struck with the pestilence of rejection and hate. Hopes are now like shredded threads, Frayed away from a rope. I seek shade under a leafless tree. I hold on to a crutch as a prop. I curl up like a helpless embryo, Floating and whirling in lucid agony. Shutters of Distress is about to close in Before that, I should invite death. Lying in death is preferable to living with death. I must cross this cursed field. My tomb I see under a humble stone. I shall rest there, no more haunted by the fret of life. It could be just a mound of earth, My lone resting place in a deserted corner Where no one will ever visit this nondescript. Where no one comes with a bouquet of blooms, Where dandelions may sprout from cracks, To honor this mongrel of a man. * * * * * * In the absence of pallbearers and a hearse I totter carrying my orphaned corpse, And walk the deserted road, Inching my way to my grave.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2024




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Date: 4/23/2024 5:16:00 AM
Valsa, congratulations on your win in my contest with this outstanding poem, I love the quote too, Constance
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Date: 3/20/2024 2:23:00 PM
Congratulations friend
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Date: 3/17/2024 6:07:00 PM
I remember Donne's " Death Be Not Proud." The ultimate reality of an universal theme with personal touch, melancholy, mood, solitude, all components are merging in rhythm in confluence.
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Date: 3/15/2024 9:46:00 AM
Congratulations on your win. I enjoyed reading your very sad/wonderful "Tomb" write. Great quote/Great ending... Have a blessed day/weekend writing away.................
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Date: 3/13/2024 7:48:00 PM
Sometimes we feel death would make it easier but what if it doesn't? We will never know until the bridge is crossed. Life presents us with intense pain and challenges that make us question our lives. This is a lovely piece that isn't just a quest for death but a shallow question of our loneliness, would there even be flowers or would the tomb be empty? Valsa dear, you have done well with this bright imagination towards reality.
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Date: 3/13/2024 2:27:00 AM
Emphatic!! Each and every line clutches the heart. Loneliness, death, darkness, hopelessness, so enigmatically, stunningly personified!!
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Date: 3/12/2024 1:30:00 PM
A haunting, ghostly story which is perfect for the contest category. I like horror and I feel your poem rocks.
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Date: 3/11/2024 1:25:00 PM
An excellent poem dear Valsa.. Your poem is a poignant exploration of despair, loneliness, and the contemplation of mortality. Its evocative imagery and raw emotion invite readers to confront the darkness within the human soul and reflect on the fragility of life and the search for meaning in the face of suffering.
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Date: 3/11/2024 6:54:00 AM
What a deeply moving take on tomb, i felt so much reading this very well woven poem, especially the descriptive manner youv painted imagery and made your lines flow in such soulful eloquence. So many lines stood out for me but i love the lines “ Where no one will ever visit this nondescript. Where no one comes with a bouquet of blooms, Where dandelions may sprout from cracks,“ that hit so deep and gives a sense of loneliness and being forgotten even in their tomb: made me feel so much: another one of your poems that I absolutely love as i love dark poetry. And emotions and you’ve not only included that but also used such creative wordplay! Pleasure reading your work. Fave it is
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Date: 3/11/2024 6:18:00 AM
The poem is on darker side of life. After all it is about a tomb. You have created an unimaginable imagery. Kudos.
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Date: 3/11/2024 4:41:00 AM
I love dark poems. Need to write one. Your poem is so full of emotion and imagery.
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Date: 3/11/2024 3:15:00 AM
Expressive and emotive work. It reads like someone who is very depressed about how things are going in life. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings with us. Sara K
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