To Her Highness

These here are the facts, very nearly true, about this lady I knew who ate kale. She thought it was good for you. Of course she grew a bit mad, but that's not all, she grew far less short than she grew tall, and had more than a little way to fall. So when she became not wholy sober, one day, one month, before October, surprise, surprise ... she toppled ober. She claimed to be only a clumsy goose, or did she get so tight her gait got loose from that old familiar juice abuse? And ought her mother have taught her daughter, that to keep more erect and grow more shorter, she should eat less kale and drink more water?