'Tiny Bawb' Always Wins His Fights

‘Tiny’ Bawb Always Wins His Fights - (in “Phonetically-Edited" Rhyme - for my Brit and Ausie Mites) Just before the Ausie, ‘Tiny’ Bawb, commenced to swingin’...tryin’ to knock the hooter off o’ Reggie Badger’s fice... Folks was placin’ bets that ‘Tiny’ Bawb ‘d whoop his **** for chattin’ up his sheila in a way that weren’t real nice! Now Reggie weren’t the jammiest lad when looks was divvied out...whilst ‘Tiny’ Bawb’s companion was a right fine lookin’ skirt... And folks was bettin’ perty big that - when their brawl was done - Reggie - bein’ fairly sloshed - ‘d be the one most hurt! Ezmerelda Poltergeist, ’Tiny’s’ bit o’ floff, felt the tension building and remarked - to warn the sod - “Bugger off, ya’ smarmy dweeb”...then grabbed him by the belt, slammed him up against the ba’ an’ kneed ‘im really hod! “‘Tiny’ Bawb’s the toughest bloke in Sydney,” she proclaimed, “and take my word - yer ‘bout to be the victim of a crime If you don’t feal yer boots right now...before this goes too fa'...an’ I ain’t all that keen on bein’ the one who takes the blime “For what that man ‘ll do to you! You’re ‘bout to take the biscuit for "dumbest wanker breathin'" - and to lose a buncha teeth! In fact,” she added, “I just flutt'ed twenty quid myself that ‘Tiny’ Bawb, without a doubt, ‘ll beat you half to deeth!” “So do yerself a favor,” she continued, “on yer bike, ‘cause rackin’ off’s the only way you’ll live another dye! All them sca’s’ on Tiny’s fice should give ya' some idea of what that squiffy beast ‘ll do to make his rivals pye. “It’s not that I’m not flatt'ed, and - if Tiny weren’t aroun' - although yer hod to look at - we’d’a prob’ly wound up mites, But, as it is, he’ll kick yer **** if you don’t leave right now, ‘cause ‘Tiny’ Bawb - I'll guarantee ya’ - always wins his fights!” Cheers, Mark S. FYI: My latest poetry books and Audio CDs of poetry are available at: writerofbooks.com