Time Saving Tips

My life it is so busy these days I need to save time where I can So to shave off a few minutes here and there I've come up with a master plan Astronaut underwear That's just a given How much time that's going to save I need not even mention I'm going to wear my glasses below my nose That way my nose for itself can see Whether it needs picking or not That's going to save my finger and me a lot of grief Soap on a rope will go around my neck I'll bathe in sinks as I get ripe To save on minutes and energy I'll do one pit at a time I'll pull out my agua blue polyester leisure suit That I've saved from the 70's I'll wear it all the time, even to bed at night Those suckers stay wrinkle free My toothbrush I'll paste up and place in my mouth When I hop into bed for a good nights sleep In the morning I'll be all freshened and brushed From a night of grinding teeth I even got the brilliant idea One night while watching my dog A device on his rear so he can mop While he scratches his butt across the floor These are just a few good ideas I'm sure I'll think of more Once I have all this spare time Sitting around bored outta my gourd