Tiktok Dancing

There was richness to our story There was flavor to our past Once, there was Michelangelo Up there at his ceiling so vast In spite of all that greatness, Humility kept us in check Just fingers on the hand of God — Just cards in an ordered deck Then, one day, the rivers flooded No face’s image could be seen Narcissism conquered the land With its vain and fevered dreams And where once there was culture, In its place went reality shows Now the scene is comprised of scavengers And here’s how their little dance goes: Synchronized simpletons Learn a few simple steps Put on something tight Over their fat And they’re all over the internet Even the sight of TikTok dancing Makes me want to shoot up the place People used to invent things People used to write books People were more than the sum of their parts — Not man-buns and fleeting looks But now Jalaiah is doing the Renegade And the Siren Beat is all the rage High hopes for my daughter One day she oughta Be dancing in an algorithmic cage Just the mere sight of TikTok dancers Makes me want to shoot up the place Nothing makes me hate people Like a series of choreographed steps So take your flash mob on the subway track And your “Tootsie Slide” right off-a the deck ‘Cause the slightest mention Of TikTok dancing Is enough to make me shoot up the place Philadelphia