Three Am Thoughts

Another night, i can't sleep Another day, another me Everything that i know, feels like a grand illusion Everything i own, heaps on me A mass confusion. Middle kid of history with no purpose or cause Only thing i know to be real is survival and loss the left ram against the right one is clearly a scam but the other more... appeasing. which causes more worry to a man. can i trust it? when everything ive known, is practically a scam? i cant even deal with my own problems, much less take a stand. my own problems weight me down like a lead belt my own seemed to reject me more, the further i knelt. Im lost and internally alone.. everyone i become attached to either rejects me or disposes of me after a period certain uncertainty is all ive known like a turtle with only its shell as a home.