This Body I'M In

Being an empath has its ups and downs… Being an empath has its smiles and frowns… I just know when people are talking behind my back…I am but a horribly lonesome shack It’s sad that family and friends don’t have my back and weigh you down like a backpack I’m sorry I wasn’t good enough I’m sorry I wasn’t good enough I’m sorry I wasn’t significant in your eyes I’m sorry for telling you all sorts of white lies But I’m done being defeated by depression I’m done, trying to impress you when you express nothing but no appreciation I will welcome the sun, even if you won’t and remain in your abyss for life I will welcome the sun, even if it means separating peace from strife I hate when you talk behind my back Like I have no meaning in life at all I’m like a curtain without a sturdy tack As if I have no purpose to stand tall I let my guard down and lift you up some more All you do is bring me down and make me feel sore I’m sorry I don’t have trust towards you anymore Sorry, the truth hurts and the words you say tore me apart to the core You don’t even apologize Sometimes, it hurts, you know? Don’t you even realize That I still appreciate you though You glisten in the moonlight I have held you close with might But, now, I must let go, you see? Do you clearly see? Now, Know that trust in you doesn’t mend too easily with me Everybody seems to disappear in the darkest, loneliest moment in time This body I’m in screams out to You in vain as I gain more weight hopelessly…when will I be truly free? Will you accept what’s bottled up inside me — this innocent, clever rhyme? This body I’m in deems to be in disapproval in society’s standards and I moan and sigh helplessly Being an empath, this selfless, encouraging empath Has given me hope and wrath and I’ve gone the wrong path When I told you that I don’t love you the same The moment you made me feel insane and I’m the one to blame I told you through silence and such That I will never trust the one I lust Or trust the one that hurt me so much Or trust the one who backfires at me for no apparent reason — it’s a must That I leave you behind in the dust of time and beyond the river’s bend Sometimes, it hurts to the wretched core and this scar won’t mend Unless you comprehend how the hell I feel…of course, it doesn’t matter to you Because this feeling inside is killing me, but to you, it’s no big deal without rue Without you and the others that spitefully gossip, I’d like to say thank you for the bad reputation that brews around me It screws my mindset and makes me want to RIP I’d like to say you’re welcome for the trouble you cause me on the daily Manipulate me, you narcissistic, arrogant and meanspirited individual…why are you so cruel? I dare you to try to break me inevitably so I can try to escape the neglect and abandonment that play me the frivolous fool I can relate to Christ on the cross, you know? But, I forgive beyond belief I will give you some relief By being merciful to you exceedingly so By being a good example, despite my woe