The Spreading of Gifts

As if life wasn't hard enough. Today made it so much more tough. My self-confidence almost didn't exist. Now it is all but dismissed. Finding a decent women is hard task Now I feel I shouldn't even ask. I don't even want to try anymore. They have slam shut and locked the door. I am lost, don't know what to do now. I must push on through but I don't know how. There are so many questions I have like why? No one will answer me, no one on which I can rely. It has been five long years since my last time. Now my life was stopped on a dime. So to my girlfriend who cheated on me a long time ago. Thanks, but the gift you gave me will never go.