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The Sparrow That Fell

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Below is the poem entitled The Sparrow That Fell which was written by poet Sara Kendrick. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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The Sparrow That Fell

                                                 Bird wiggles
                                              Upon concrete
                                     Downy feathers, weak feet
                                                 Death waits

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  1. Date: 8/13/2011 8:54:00 PM
    Sad tale - I remember seeing an injured bird near the N.Y. subway - I told the police about the poor animal - I doubt they did anything. Nice poem but I suggest changing the last word to "awaits".

  1. Date: 8/11/2011 1:29:00 PM
    Thjis one is so sad Sara. One can only hope it'sw parents will come along before anything happens to it. This happens when they are tryng their wings. God Bless, JB

  1. Date: 8/9/2011 2:21:00 PM
    This is a sad one Sara, lovely write.. You made me smile with your comment on "The Faceless One"

  1. Date: 8/7/2011 3:53:00 PM
    oh so sad to see this happen ..we found a dead bird down here at the beach having been struck by lightening last night it seems... lovely presentation Sara.. though tragic..

  1. Date: 8/7/2011 3:04:00 PM
    aww such a sad thing! Nature seems cruel sometimes. I have to watch for those things around here esp. for squirrels that get too careless. We've 12 cats prowling the yard between house and the barn. Great poem Sara. Made an impact

  1. Date: 8/7/2011 2:49:00 PM
    I can see the cat coming closer! Good write. xoxo Robert.

  1. Date: 8/7/2011 2:23:00 AM
    what an ouchie, sara.. so sensitively portayed.. can't satnd animals getting hurt.. lovely as always..:) huggs

  1. Date: 8/7/2011 12:15:00 AM
    Sara, a very sad fall.. this happens in my back yard often... well lost eggs i see mostly.. I don;t like what awaits for the baby birds when they take that wiggle of the branch... thanks for sharing,..p.d.

  1. Date: 8/6/2011 10:00:00 PM
    you know i really hate it when i see a baby sparrow fall from the nest, so young, never got a chance at life. a very good poem will put it in my favorites. sorry i have not read any of your stuff for a while hurt my back, still hurts, to sit very long and i have been doing that for some time, trying to catch up with my comments that goes back almost a month.

  1. Date: 8/6/2011 8:22:00 PM
    Such a sad situation, yours words paint it so well.

  1. Date: 8/6/2011 7:41:00 AM
    Smile, *^_^* “You Know, Sometimes I Find Myself A Tad Speechless *^_^* And Yet Better I Believe In Certain Lights & Measure That I Do *^_#* But Always My Dear Precious & Priceless Sara Kendrick *^_^* Passions Poe!” === My Love & Warmth to You Always & All You Love, Jasper *

  1. Date: 8/5/2011 10:39:00 PM
    Awww how sad. But well told! I enjoyed how you used the form for the poem quite well. Keep up the good work!

  1. Date: 8/5/2011 8:29:00 PM
    oh, sara, I did one like this a long time ago, only it was about a quail. It's so sad, isn't it? I like how you did yours.

  1. Date: 8/5/2011 7:57:00 PM
    Strong cinqku on the poor baby sparrow, Sara. Reminds me of a poem I wrote about a baby swallow....concrete was the scene as well.

  1. Date: 8/5/2011 6:33:00 PM
    oh i hope it doesn't die...but i think it might. poor bird. a great cinqku. I can picture the bird now. p.s. my poem cardboard ceiling was purely fictional. thanks for commenting!