The Realization of Heartbreak

because baby, if I lost you, my heart would break into thousands of pieces, just waiting for you to come back. even though I know you wont my heart just couldn't possibly never let you go, even after all the months, they say how it only takes 21 days, 21 day to break my habit, yet it's been 16 months, yet my habit of loving you had only grown stronger. and it because of you, it's because being in love with you, that everything fell apart. I guess we both had different meaning of love. it all happened because I fell in love with you. if I didn't fall in love with you none of this would have happened. you wouldn't have ignored me, you wouldn't have left, I wouldn't be sitting in my bed all day, waiting and waiting and waiting, just for you to come back. it was hard you know, not being able to go out placed anymore. because every time I went out, I saw the places we went, I remembered all the memories we had there, every time I left my house I saw yours and I just fell to the ground, if I just kept my mouth closed, you would still hold me close, but holding me close was the worst choice you ever made. you made me think we had a thing. we never did, we never had, we never will. sometimes I just think it would've been easier to keep everything in. but it's hard lying to your best friend, your best friend who you've loved I've loved him for 6 years. even though I'm 18, it don't mean you were too young to love him, it sorta just happened. we've known each other since I was born. it's been almost 2 years now. yet I'm still waiting, I haven't been healing, I'm failing my classes, I lost all my friends, and it's all because you decided to leave. yet through all the pain, I still love you baby.