The Purranha

The missionary had a cat, which travelled in the hold That missionary sat beside a lady with a cold She had a pointed hat and sneezed when they were due to land Her book of spells flipped open and then things got out of hand… In the hold where creatures were returning to the wild The beasts all got mixed up, and then a Tigerilla smiled From his tank the ugly fish crash landed with a splat And then he saw the open door and flipped and flopped to that The fish flapped all around; his bid, to find the Amazon But everywhere he looked he found the Amazon was gone He couldn’t know the plane had landed elsewhere on its way And when he found a water hole he said a quick, “Hooray” The missionary’s cat said, “Wow, that pool’s a lucky find, But watch out for the hippo with his really huge behind, And also, what is lucky, is we haven't mixed together, Like all those other creatures which are now as one forever.” The ugly fish leapt in the pool, with just his head still out He said, “I’m a piranha, I eat anything about.” I guess, Dear reader, that I have no need to tell you that What this fish had for dinner… was the missionary’s cat There was a tremble in the ground, a sparkle in the air And suddenly there was no cat and no piranha there What there was was crazy, it had fins and it had fur And anyone around would swear they heard the damned thing purr So now we find another creature, mixed up by a spell A creature that might just come crawling from your water well Is it a fish, is it a cat and does it matter that It’s a creature that might leave a shin bone on your mat Of course, in science, every single thing must have a name And Mister Missionary seemed to have no sense of shame Maybe he was sidetracked as he nibbled a banana But it was he that came up with a name for it… Purr-anha So if you’re walking late one night and hear some tyres squeal Is it a hedgehog in the road or something more surreal But let me reassure you it wont be a cat with fins And it wont be a fish that creeps up close to bite your shins For this is the Purr-anha and the jungle is its home Until it learns to fly a plane it isn’t free to roam So in the jungle there’s a fish with claws and it seems tough That we once thought a fish with razor teeth was bad enough