The Possibility

what is it but the possibility of excitement that really excites us? for when some hear news of a storm coming, they gather all their things & their mouths are in constant babble with others, as if they’d never underwent a storm in their lives. when sexual excitement is possible, when the plausibility of an encounter is on the horizon, the parties at hand might have their hearts racing faster, sweating more furiously & salivating at the lips, even more so than when the deed actually goes down. ay, but the rub is the actuality of things--- the utter disappointment in a storm that had been predicted to be horrendous, ending up to be only a drizzle, only a few fleeting clouds, and the tearing off of another’s clothes, ending up in nothing close to resembling the rumbling passionate fantasies that provoked the whole incident. and in both cases, when the storms move past us, when the sex moves out of reach, we are left dry & desolate, learning not from the mistaken delusions that lead us here, but rather, mustering more fantasies, so as to do it all over again (achieving nothing but the same outcome).