The Perfect Man

The perfect man would always bathe Before making love he would shave Take out the trash without a reminder To my pet cat, he would be kinder The perfect man would sense my mood He would try to help any way he could He would always choose to take me out He would never wear that old camo cap The perfect man would not snore Or scratch in public, or me ignore He would only go hunting when I had things to do with my friends The perfect man would never fart He would love me with all his heart He would try to please me every minute And prove to me his heart was in it The perfect man would make lots of money Then hand it over, “say here you go, honey” He would buy me a brand new ride And drive that old truck of his with pride The perfect man could cook and clean He would never, ever treat me mean He would do all the things that I like He’d never tell me to go take a hike The perfect man wouldn’t pick a fight Or make me watch hunting shows at night He would know what gave me pleasure He would buy me things that I would treasure I haven’t found the perfect man I‘m not so sure that I ever can So I guess I will have to settle for you Your less than perfect, but you will do!