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The Perfect Bath

Before her glassy eyes, crystal bubbles seem to strangely dance. Slipping down into the water as deeply as she can, she revels in the liquid warmth enwrapping her. Such contrast this is to the crispness of the air around her! Before running her bath, she felt compelled to turn off all the heat in the house. Now she reaches for her glass on the edge of the tub. Bringing it to her lips, she savors one last time the wine, her one small taste of "heaven" from the bottle now lying nearly empty where it spilled out to wet the floor’s cold tiles. Very relaxed, she sets the glass back down beside her. It topples over. The woman hears it shatter. . . yet she lies still. Intoxicated (as was her plan), she lays the sharp edge of a razor blade against her wrist. Making sure to clutch it well, she slices through veins but feels no pain. Then the other side. . . Red fluid threads stream among the fading fizz (all that now remains of the dancing bubbles). And as she drifts off into numbing unconsciousness, it dawns on her that her tub has somehow become unplugged! She is too lightheaded. . . too feeble now to move. The heated fragrant water slowly and steadily subsides. A sharp chill invades her body. With her final breaths, the woman thinks of how her one last plan - to be discovered immersed completely in water - has ended up just like every other messed up thing she ever did and how her plan, like the water of her "perfect" bath, has just gone down the damn proverbial drain. 7/7/13

Copyright © | Year Posted 2013




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Date: 7/26/2013 6:03:00 AM
Its no wonder you won with this poem.Fabulous imagery!
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Date: 7/18/2013 10:06:00 PM
Nice to see you on Debbie Guzzi, winning list...... Congratulations! Hugs* SKAT
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Date: 7/18/2013 4:30:00 PM
What a heart wrenching write. Well deserved win Andrea, Big congrats! Truly moved the reader.
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Date: 7/18/2013 2:25:00 PM
So real Andie, just a heads up this could be flash fiction or with the addition of a few haiku, a haubun! Big Congrad's on your fine work taking the top spot! Light & Love
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Debbie Guzzi
Date: 7/18/2013 2:26:00 PM
killer ending too! ;)
Date: 7/18/2013 8:28:00 AM
bravo, andrea! this is a wonderful poem - so easy to picture every step of the way and so sad! congrats on a well-deserved top win!
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Date: 7/17/2013 3:20:00 PM
this is a powerhouse of a piece, andie.. big congrats on your win!..:) huggs
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Date: 7/17/2013 1:33:00 PM
Great winning work..Congrats on your great win..Sara
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Date: 7/17/2013 7:10:00 AM
congrats on your win. great write
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Date: 7/17/2013 6:48:00 AM
congrats on a great win Andrea
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Date: 7/16/2013 10:58:00 PM
Congrats, Andrea, nice work !!
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Date: 7/16/2013 8:25:00 PM
Ow gee..this is so different.It gives me chills iy spine..A very.dark and sad poem.I love how creative you are here.You are able to write any type of poetry..Well done sweet lady.
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Date: 7/16/2013 7:26:00 PM
Ok I remember commenting on this earlier saying that I thought this was your best effort so far and I see that Deb apparently agrees...This really shows you are willing to go to the dark side, a place I don't remember seeing you go much before... I see the ending as almost humorous (the way you wrote it anyway) but I can hear her saying something like this to herself as her whole life begins to fades away...
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Date: 7/16/2013 5:40:00 PM
This is as chilling a scene as it gets......a perfect bath....written to perfection. I love the way you ended this.........down.....the.........drain.............. !! Kuddos!
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Date: 7/16/2013 5:19:00 PM
A great congrats on your superb win, my friend. Loved always, bl
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Date: 7/13/2013 6:54:00 PM
Yes, stunning write Andrea, strangely as I read this I had still pics flashing through my mind, good luck in the contest. Take care, Richard
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Date: 7/13/2013 8:54:00 AM
Beautiful poem penned nicely and enjoyed a lot. Good luck in the contest. Loved always, bl
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Date: 7/10/2013 7:00:00 PM
An excellent write Andrea, but oh my gosh, chills run up and down my spine with this too real image. Provokes an uneasiness within me as if I witnessed her suicide. I didn't see this coming, but, wow! Warm Smiles, Connie
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Date: 7/10/2013 4:08:00 PM
very nice write Andrea....best wishes
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Date: 7/10/2013 5:16:00 AM
Wow wow and even more wows,
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Date: 7/9/2013 3:51:00 PM
wow, this is so good!! Just love this one, Andrea. A sure winner
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Date: 7/8/2013 6:21:00 PM
Andrea..these haunting too real poems unnerve me but I admire the talent it takes to write them...I may have to try one someday...this is really awesome..
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Date: 7/8/2013 1:19:00 AM
Andrea, the poem evokes fear of futility from a progressive plot of actions. Love. Angel
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Date: 7/7/2013 11:12:00 PM
creepy work. I like it. sorry I haven't been around much. had to check on everyone.
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Date: 7/7/2013 10:31:00 PM
A misleading paradise. Spectacular!
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Date: 7/7/2013 9:30:00 PM
What a dark picture you paint here! It is very vivid - almost scary. Good luck in the contest! Peace & Love Matthew Anish
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Book: Reflection on the Important Things