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The Last Moment

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Just a young boy with my head in the game, my value of fortune far less than the fame. My buddies and baseball we're all that I knew, then fate threw a curve when I noticed you too. Off in the distance you silently stayed, never a word, you just watched as I played. Would you have smiled if I looked back at you? You had no idea I was watching you too. Each game on the monkey bars there you would sit, so hard I pretended to not notice it. Listening clearly to laughing and play, then one day I heard your voice call out my name. Heart in my socks and feet frozen in place, I shifted my eyes without moving my face. There you were, smiling and waving at me. With the raise of my hand, change of plans, destiny! The story so goes but in fear I forget the story so sweet of the day that we met, my warm colored canvas still moment in time, before all my reason was being your rhyme. -Jeannie Minor 12/04/2015

Copyright © | Year Posted 2015




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Date: 5/6/2019 5:06:00 AM
Very beautifully said! Nice work!
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Date: 3/5/2016 5:51:00 PM
Lucky guy! Enjoyed the read. Peace my dear:)
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Jeannie Cronin
Date: 3/6/2016 2:45:00 AM
It was a fun and interesting contest.
Date: 12/16/2015 9:15:00 PM
JEANNIE :) CONGRATS ON YOUR WIN...... SKAT
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Jeannie Cronin
Date: 12/16/2015 9:45:00 PM
Thanks SKAT
Date: 12/16/2015 5:04:00 AM
Well crafted, Jeannie. First love..sigh. Congratulations.
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Jeannie Cronin
Date: 12/16/2015 8:19:00 AM
Thanks, Lin. Always nice to hear from you.
Date: 12/7/2015 2:05:00 PM
BRILLIANT Jeannie! Beautifully written with skillful rhyming and smooooth flow. Such a well developed story with a saaad ending! BRAVO YOU!! Best wishes, Keith
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Keith Bickerstaffe
Date: 12/7/2015 3:19:00 PM
It would be tough to make it any better without real, substantial change... and I think that would spoil it. You a true Creative writer! Keith
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Jeannie Cronin
Date: 12/7/2015 3:16:00 PM
Thank you, Keith. I had so much fun with this. Unfortunately, I didn't read Eve's blog that had given a bit of background info on her painting before I wrote and submitted. Definitely would have impacted my creative direction!

Book: Shattered Sighs