The Infamous Scottish Muse

The time has come your passing has happened Your desire to live was never dampened The great Scottish debate for you to stay or go I screamed yes, but the haggis of your heart said no The split of our nation represents the split in my heart But now the time has come and we must part Much like our dreams of reaching the sixth form debate final “Page 32” you crowbarred into conversation infuriating Ash to the point of self-immolation your self important boasts of superior knowledge turned my my weakened soul into watery porridge You were not a stereotype, despite what many said Unlike most Scots, you ate more than simply fried bread Your challenge with crackers so lascivious that I lost my thread And since then I yearned for a way to do more than simple observe your bed But your aggression was endearing, cutting and clear Tearing opponents to shreds, speaking to all that will hear But I was behind a glass wall, simply shedding a tear As a limp invitation to a party was the closest I could near I sit here now and remember our lark Our time together, characterized by a battle with a shark The verbal brutality was shocking that situation was stark But your retorts were quick witted, but often loaded with snark This took so long to write as my heart still bares scars An open mouth like yours could give hour long seminars Yet you still saved me from being bundled into one of Bennet’s cars Yet I must hope that we meet again, underneath heaven’s stars