The Giant and My Son

I married Jane sister of Glen His my best imaginary friend And now we have a son When it came to children we wanted only to have one Anyway, here is a true story of something that happened when he was four By the way I am not writing about the funnies anymore My son was playing outside one day Mmmm I think it was around the middle of May All of a sudden he came running in soaked and began to cry So I ran to him and asked him the reason why? He said he was playing and having imaginary tea Then this giant came over and, and weeeeed on meeeeeee!!! “What?” I said Horns were growing out my head, My eyes were red Axe in one hand, baseball bat in the other Through gritted teeth I say “I’m going to kill this mother.” (No swearing Sid) Outside, inside I’m soaked through My son cries out “He got you too.” Now from all this commotion My wife comes down stairs, moving like a locomotion With a blow dryer in one hand and a curling brush in the other Here came “Don’t you dare mess with my Son’s” mother Like a woman possessed Still sporting her night dress I even saw Satan cower in the corner But hey, before I could warn her Out, in, it must have been two seconds at that She was standing in the kitchen looking like a wet rat I began to laugh and my son said “IT’S NOT FUNNY!!” “HE GOT ME, HE GOT YOU AND NOW HE GOT MUMMY” Then my son got all brave which made me proud He opens the door and shouted out loud “PICK ON SOMEONE YOUR OWN SIZE YOU BIG RAIN CLOUD”