The First Time

Somehow I knew it would be amazing. The romantic I found in you kept my fantasy hopes anxiously high. First smiles, first long stares and first kisses, all the best, causing my longing hope of finding real love to swell with aching sensitivity. Anticipations rising of all it would be and all it wouldn't, I gave myself to you, for the first time. From the moment your eyes fell warmly on my naked skin, pursued by a soft gentle touch, we reveled in disbelief. Time stood still as we spent hours exploring hidden pleasures. Overcome with sensation, I was desperate to share everything with you, uninhibited, for the first time. Consumed in surrender I lost myself from appearances and expectations. Holding your gaze, I found you seeking the chance to peer deeply so as to coalesce our mysteries. At heights of flowing passion and in fear of cheating myself once again of sharing the sensational pleasures of it all, I allowed you to see me, for the first time. Bodies weakened of strength yet replete with affection, loved far beyond the physical and never more satisfied, I lay in the safety and strength of your arms. Spooned in warmth and comfort while drifting into a deep sleep, I will always remember my last thoughts of asking myself "Why wasn't it like that the first time?" It was then I realized, my own fear of painful vulnerability had protected my virginity. This night, in the fiftieth year of my life, I made love, real love, for the first time.