The Alphabet of Broken Love

A is for angst, the lacerating emotion you spark inside my guts when I think of you… B is for Bingo…boy did I win at that game… C is for cherish, those precious moments you and I shared on the bleached white sand D is for diabetes, the illness that nearly stole you from me on the crimson wings of death – incidentally another word beginning with ‘D’ E is for evening, those long lonely hours I spent on my balcony watching the sun set while I listened for your car F is for fragrance, the heady scent of your freshly washed hair and talcum-powdered skin G is for god…you’ve nearly convinced me you are one H is for hatred, the dual side of our lovers’ coin I is for insanity, the manic voices that whisper in my ears when you’re not around… J is for jealousy, your sardonic variety and my engulfing passion K is for knots…the tangles in your silken hair, the bigger ones in my throat, the massive one you tied in my heartstrings L is for love, the obvious, the beautiful, the destroyer and the architect of you and me M is for music, it brought us together, it bore us along on its screaming wings, it consoled and comforted and consumed… N is for nails, the ones that are hammered into my wrists now that I’ve lost you, crucifying me on the cross you carved out of infatuation and despair O is for “Oh my God”…how I love you, how you anger me, how beautiful you look when you don’t even have to try… P is for pleading, begging you not to cut me off, while the cell phone slips and slides against my sweating palms Q is for quiet, that soft blanketing calm we shared on those sunrise vigils while the dew glistened on the lawn R is for rage, the incensed gleam in your eyes, the hot knives stabbing through my veins, the grappling beneath a street lamp one tawdry night… S is the first letter of your name T is for how tenuous our bond is now, how it hangs by a thread, so close to breaking U is for unkind, you were that day you broke my heart V is for vanity, your primping in front of the mirror in your rock star threads, my arrogant belief that I deserved you… W is for wine, the copious glasses of ruby red that help ease the agony of our separation and then give me a head ache in the morning to match the one in my heart X is for your first wife, who stared stonily down at me from the pictures that still hung on your wall… Y is for you, my angel, the harbinger of my despair, misery monger and beautiful heart breaker Z is for zero, for emptiness, nil, nothing…the death of our great love